A Taste of Pink (Shades Book 4)

by Stephanie Hoffman McManus

  “Are you listening to yourself? Did you not just say it was a bad idea to fake a relationship with someone you have real feelings for? What about your feelings, Hunter, or was the article just a lie to help me?”

  “It wasn’t a lie, Riley. I meant every word of it, and I know this is a bad idea. For me. But I’d rather have you break my heart, than watch him break yours anymore than he already has.”

  I looked away. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m fine.”

  “Bullshit,” he whispered harshly. “I could see you weren’t fine on the press tour, just like I can see you’re definitely not fine now. Luis is right that you have to take control of the media circus, and you need someone on your side. Not just Luis, or Angela, who can sometimes forget that we’re more than a job. And not someone you’re paying to be on your side either.” That little barb was clearly directed at James, and it stung. Because it was true. Well at least it had been. He said he didn’t care anymore if I paid him or not, he was staying. But even then, I didn’t know if it was for me, or because he didn’t know how to not do the right thing. In his eyes, he’d taken a job and had to see it through.

  “You need someone at your side who gets it.”

  “But why do I have to lie at all?” I sighed. “I’m tired of faking it, maybe I just want something real.”

  “Don’t we all,” he laughed dryly. “In the meantime, Mila, and Derrick aren’t going to back off until their version of the truth is the one everyone is buying, so Luis is right. You’ve got to give them something else. Something bigger and better and juicier. That’s me and you.”

  “So, I just what? Dump the real-life American hero I just spent weeks convincing the world I was falling in love with, and convincing them to fall in love with him too, for one of the biggest actors in the world? Because that won’t make me look like a bitch?”

  “No, you tell a version of the truth. That you were being stalked and harassed and needed the security. You and James became close while he was protecting you. He was there for you, and you hoped it might discourage Warren if it appeared you were in a relationship, but you two are only friends.”

  “Wow, sounds like you and Luis have already plotted and scripted everything.”

  He grinned annoyingly. “We had time on the flight.”

  “Hunter,” I sighed, still not on board. More lies and pretending couldn’t be the only solution.

  “Riley,” he responded, waiting for me to say something else.

  “I don’t think I can do this. Not with James anymore, and not with you either. It gets too complicated and messy. I don’t do drugs. If I tell the truth about Warren Baker, then that will include the accident. He caused it. That has to be enough for them, and if it’s not, if they still want to believe Mila and Derrick, then maybe I just walk away. It’s not what I want, but I could do it, and it might be best for everyone. Hell, it might even be what I need.”

  “I don’t buy that. You love what you do and you’re an incredibly talented actress who hasn’t even begun to show the world what she can do. You can’t let them take that from you. And who knows, maybe I’ll be able to make you fall for me and forget all about Captain America in there. I’ve been told I’m quite charming and irresistible.”

  I chuckled softly. “You should have gotten here two days ago, you would have loved it. I had to tear posters of you down off my bedroom walls.”

  His face lit up with delight. “Really? You had me on your walls? Oh baby, tell me I got you through the dark, lonely nights on this ranch as a teenager.”

  “Eww,” I smacked him. “See, that’s exactly why I had to tear them down, because I knew if you ever found out, you’d be impossible to deal with.”

  “So then why tell me? Because you were right. I’m never going to let this go. Not now that I know I have a chance.”

  “I didn’t say you had a chance. I just told you because I want you to know that in a way, this is sort of a dream come true, but that was then, and dreams change. Teenage girls grow up, and sometimes they realize everything they thought they wanted isn’t what they thought it was, and what they really want is something they didn’t even know existed.”

  “I don’t think I like what you’re saying.”

  “I can’t use you, Hunter. I can’t do it. You said you were okay with me breaking your heart, but I’m not.”

  “I was mostly kidding, Ri. I know the score. It’s not going to stop me from hoping, but I promise, I won’t let you break my heart. You heard Luis, we don’t even have to be in a relationship. We just have to let them think we are. All you have to do is spend time with me, and since I’m awesome, it’s a win win for you.”

  I laughed again, and Hunter smiled wider. “See, being around me is good for you. You don’t look sad when you look at me the way you do when you look at him.”

  I ducked my eyes again, but he reached forward and lifted my chin, bringing my gaze back up. “I won’t put any pressure on you, Riley, and we’ll do it your way. I don’t care about Luis or anyone else. I just care about you, and I don’t want to see Mila win. Mean people can’t win, Riley. You can’t let them.”

  “You dated her,” I pointed out.

  “She might be mean but she’s hot. And good in bed, so sue me.”

  “I might. After all, she hates me because of you.”

  “No. She hates you because she knows the truth,” he said intently. “She’s the girl guys want to fuck for a little while. You’re the one they want to fuck forever.”

  “Oh my gosh,” I smacked him again.

  He shrugged. “It’s true. You’re the girl we want to keep.”

  I shook my head. “I’m not sure which of us is crazier, but okay. I’ll do it, but not the way it was with James. I can’t hold your hand and kiss you in public like I did him. I just can’t do that right now.” No matter how badly I felt now, I just couldn’t. I couldn’t make those moments with James into nothing by stomping all over them with Hunter. Regardless of whatever story, whatever “truth” I told the rest of the world, I would know, and he would know, that it hadn’t been nothing.

  Eighteen

  James

  I could see it in her eyes, or more accurately the way her eyes wouldn’t meet mine when she returned from the kitchen with Hunter. He’d talked her into it. She was going to keep playing Luis’ games. Letting him manipulate her. He could see it too, and the bastard didn’t even bother to hide his smug grin.

  He was smooth. Said all the right shit she needed to hear, but it was obvious, to me at least, that they were only words. He’d say whatever he had to to keep her under his control. I didn’t know if Hunter was a part of it or not. I couldn’t tell what his motives were in this situation. He was either here to get something he wanted, or she was what he wanted. Either way, I didn’t like the guy.

  Riley faced off with Luis, arms folded, face serious as she told him how it was going to go, and he nodded like he was taking everything she said to heart and pretending to be properly put in his place. I was better than most at reading people, the subtle things that gave them away, and that bastard couldn’t have been more pleased, even if Riley couldn’t see it.

  There was part of me that wanted to march up the stairs, collect my shit and catch the first flight to Seattle. I could be done with this mess and her, but I couldn’t do it. At this point I was physically incapable of walking away. Not when I knew she could get hurt. This prick in the suit. The pretty-boy. Warren Baker. They were all after something. They all wanted a piece of her, and I’d be damned if I let them tear her apart to get it.

  Mission wasn’t over.

  Don’t ask me exactly what the mission was, because things had gotten a little blurred, but it wasn’t over ‘til it was over.

  God, this was going to suck.

  Fuckity, fuck, fuck.

  How had I gotten in this deep?

  Nineteen

  Riley

  Luis left.

  Hunter stayed.

/>   James disappeared.

  Well, not disappeared disappeared, but he bailed at some point during my chat with Luis and Hunter. I knew I should go find him and talk to him, but it was almost easier to let him avoid me. I had no idea what he was thinking or feeling if he felt anything at all.

  I only knew that in the second our eyes met when I walked out of the kitchen with Hunter, he looked disappointed in me. It was only a moment, but I saw it before he steeled himself. I couldn’t dwell on that though, because if I let myself think about it, then I’d have to admit I was maybe a tiny bit disappointed in myself.

  I gave in when I said I wouldn’t. I was doing exactly what Luis wanted me to do like a good little girl. I had stood up to him though. I made sure he knew we were going to do things my way. I was in control this time. At least I kept telling myself that. Made it easier to stomach that tomorrow I would be hopping on a plane back to L.A. With Hunter.

  When did my real life become as twisted and complicated as something from a movie?

  When did Riley become the part I was playing?

  I know, I know, poor me, I had to pretend to sort of date the most desirable actor in Hollywood. And he was sweet and funny and genuine—totally deserving of his desired status—and he wanted to help me. There were worse things I could do to save my career.

  “He’s in the barn,” Hunter broke through my thoughts.

  “Huh?” How long had I just been standing there at the window staring at nothing?

  “You were looking for him, right? James. He’s in the barn. Saw him slip out there while you and Luis were arguing about interviews.” Luis wanted me on every talk show over the next week. I agreed on two.

  “Oh. I wasn’t looking for him,” I lied. “I was just lost in thought, still trying to convince myself it’s a good idea.”

  Hunter closed the distance between us and placed his hands on my arms. “Don’t stress it. Everything will be fine. We’ll save your image and then you can kick me to the curb.” He winked.

  My shoulders sagged as I breathed out a heavy sigh. “What if this all does more damage than good. What if when we call it quits on this charade, people hate me even more for breaking their golden boy’s heart?”

  He chuckled and gave my arms a squeeze. “Number one, remember we’re not going to comment on our relationship when asked, so when it’s over we’ll be able to deny we were ever dating.”

  I rolled my eyes. “You know no one is going to believe that.”

  “I know, but that’s why it’s genius. We refuse to come out and say we’re in a relationship, which will only further convince everyone we are, but then when it’s over, there’s no messy break-up, because we were never in a relationship.”

  “Your logic makes my head hurt.”

  “I’m not done. Number two, you could still fall madly in love with me and we could live happily ever after.”

  “Remind me why you didn’t leave with Luis?”

  “Because a visit to the ol’ family ranch to meet your dad is going to be a hot story as soon as the media gets wind, which Luis will make sure they do. It’ll look better if we fly out together tomorrow. More importantly, me being here is going to make it incredibly awkward with you and Captain America, and I’m not about to miss that opportunity. Now show me to your bedroom while your dad is out so I can take advantage of you like we’re a couple of teenagers sneaking around.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

  I picked up a pillow from the sofa and smacked him in the face with it. “I don’t think so. You get to sleep in the barn.”

  “Ha ha, but really, where am I staying?”

  “I’m serious, you’re sleeping in the barn.” I smirked as I watched his face fall.

  “The barn?”

  “Mmhmm,” I kept on grinning. “But don’t worry, it’s the old barn. After Dad had the new one built, he converted the old one into a shop and furnished an apartment upstairs for our ranch hand who used to live on the property.”

  His brows pinched together. “Where is James staying?”

  “In the bedroom across from mine.”

  His scowl deepened.

  “You asked for this,” I reminded him playfully.

  “I know,” he replied grudgingly. “Can’t you kick him out to the barn?”

  I chuckled. “Sure, you go ahead and tell him.”

  “On second thought, I’m sure the barn will be lovely. Never slept in a barn before.”

  I patted him on the back. “It’ll be great. I’ll show you.”

  He scooped up the single small duffel he’d brought with him for the quick trip and I showed him out to the shop. The apartment really was nice for being in an old barn. Even he agreed it surpassed what he’d expected when I said ‘barn’. It was sparsely decorated with the necessities. Nothing fancy, but it was still cozy and charming.

  “If you need me, just shout,” I told him. “I’ll be close by, tending to stuff in and out of the house. Just watch out for the rooster, he’s a dick.”

  With that warning, enjoying the slightly alarmed look on his face, I retreated from the apartment and left him alone to settle in. James was across the drive, coming out of the new barn when I stepped outside. We both paused in our tracks. Our eyes met briefly before we both continued toward the house, meeting at the porch, where again, we both stopped.

  “What were you doing?” I nodded toward the barn.

  He glanced back over his shoulder, kicking at the gravel beneath his feet. “Just helping Rick haul some more hay.”

  “You hungry? I can fix lunch,” I offered, not knowing what else to say.

  “I could eat.” He followed me inside to the kitchen. “Will your new boyfriend be joining us?” He asked, sliding onto a stool at the counter.

  With my back to him, I huffed out a breath. “He’s not my boyfriend. Just like you weren’t.” I pulled out all the ingredients for making wraps and started laying it all out on the counter.

  “Sorry, fake boyfriend.”

  I spun around, a head of lettuce in one hand, the other on my hip. “You don’t get to do this. You don’t get to try and make me feel bad for making the best choice, given everything.”

  He let out a humorless laugh. “The best choice? You mean the easiest?”

  “Nothing about this is easy.” I turned and set the lettuce with everything else on the counter and then dragged out a pan to grill the chicken.

  “Not how it looked from where I was standing. You gave in and you know it, because you’re afraid of standing on your own.”

  I slammed the pan down on the burner and turned to face him again. “I didn’t give in. I made a choice. Just because you don’t like it, doesn’t mean it was the wrong choice. Luis knows this business better than anyone. He’s the reason I’ve been so successful. He got me to where I am. Without him, I wouldn’t have any of it and that means something to me.”

  “Bullshit. You got you where you are. You’re the reason you’ve made it this far. You don’t owe him just because he was the first to see what was right in front of him and hitch himself to you for the ride. He’s manipulating you and you let him, because he’s got you so convinced that you need him, it’s pathetic.”

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” I sputtered. “Luis’ mom came to this country from South America when he was three. They had nothing, but he still rose to became this. He’s an incredible businessman who I should look up to. You know nothing about this business, or how anything works.”

  He rose from the stool. “Maybe not, but I have fucking eyeballs and I can read people. He’s using you. And you’d rather let him tell you what to do than figure your life out on your own. I had you pegged as a lot of things, and I already admitted I was wrong about most of them, but not once did I ever think you were a coward until now. When it really matters, the right choice is almost never the easy one. But making the hard choice is usually worth it. We could have been worth it.”

  My lips parted but nothing came out. I want
ed to rail at him and tell him how wrong he was, but all my words dried up.

  “You know, I’m not really that hungry after all.” He turned and walked out of the kitchen and all I could think was, what have I done?

  My appetite gone as well, I shoved everything back in the fridge, and stole away to the swing on the back deck. There were a million other things I could be doing to help Dad out. I knew how hectic it was for him after a shift at the firehouse. Rick and Joey were hard workers, but there just weren’t enough hours in the day for two guys to get everything done that needed to be done here on any given day, especially during the spring.

  Before I left for L.A. I’d have to try and convince Dad to bring on another hand. He and Rick were both getting too old to keep pushing themselves so hard, no matter how much they’d both argue that.

  The swing swayed back and forth. I lay there, curled up, and let it lull my brain and body until I dozed off. I didn’t sleep long, just enough to wake up feeling more tired than I had before. I didn’t want to go back inside. I didn’t want to see James again. He made me so mad and made me doubt myself all in the same breath.

  “Have a nice nap?” As if my thoughts had summoned him out of thin air, James was suddenly there—okay, not suddenly, he’d clearly been sitting in that chair for a bit, but it nearly startled me right out of the swing.

  “Shit,” I gasped, sitting up. “How long have you been there?”

  He shrugged. “I came out here to find you, but you were sleeping.”

  “Think of more reasons why I’m such a pathetic coward?”

  “No. I shouldn’t have said that. I seem to keep saying the wrong thing. I’m sorry.”

  I sighed and leaned back in the swing. “I’ll accept your apology because I don’t want to fight with you anymore, but we both know you meant it. That’s what you think, and there’s no point denying it. It is what it is. We’ve never been on the same page before, why would it be any different now?”