Down By The Water

by Cruise, Anna

  It was all fucked up. There was no other way to describe it. But I really wasn't sure what she wanted to do about it. Like it or not, we were stuck there. Hell, she didn't have to be stuck there. She'd chosen to come, even after I'd told her not to.

  “You can go home,” I told her. “My car will be fixed in a day or two. Kyle probably wants his car back, anyway.”

  She rolled her eyes. “All Kyle wants is the blowjob I promised him for letting me borrow his car. He's fine.”

  I grimaced. I knew my sister wasn't the image of innocence but the last thing I needed to picture was her mouth wrapped around Kyle Paulsen's dick.

  “You sure you're gonna feel like giving him one?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. “'Cuz it sorta looks like you have the hots for a guy here.” I tried to keep my tone light but there was an edge to my voice.

  Her lips curved into a smile and she shrugged. “Maybe.”

  “Whatever,” I said, trying to stem the nausea I felt at her admission. It wasn't anything I hadn't already figured out but I hated hearing her say it out loud. “But you don't have to stay here and babysit me. I'm fine. I'll get the car fixed and I'll get to Madison.”

  Her mouth twisted and puckered. “I don't like you being here by yourself.”

  I instantly thought of Ty. “I'm not by myself.”

  “You know what I mean.”

  I did, but I wasn't sure having her there was helping me at all. If anything, her flirting with Ty was pissing me off and the thought of walking in on them doing something was just one more thing to potentially freak me out. Ty hadn't shown much interest in her but my sister could be very persuasive. Especially with her shirt off and her pants down.

  “I'll stay,” she said, standing from the bed. “I don't want to leave you.”

  “Jesus, Jenna. I'm fine.”

  She folded her arms across her chest. “Whatever. I don't think you should be here alone.”

  “Why? You think Rosie's ghost is gonna come get me?”

  She cut her eyes to me and I could see the anger flare. “Don't say shit like that, Lily. Not cool.”

  “Well when did you get such a sense of sisterly love?” I said, frowning. “Because I'm pretty sure the only reason you're hanging around is to try and pull Ty into your bed.”

  She raised an eyebrow at me. “Is there some reason I shouldn't try that?”

  My cheeks flushed. “Uh, because you have a boyfriend.”

  She waved her hand. “Please. I don't give a shit about Kyle. You know that. Hell, he knows that.”

  I wasn't sure he did but I didn't say anything.

  “It's Ty, isn't it?” she asked. A knowing smile crossed her face. “You want him for yourself. Better move fast, sis. You don't have much time to put the moves on him.” Her smile deepened. “Maybe you should take notes from the pro. I'll totally show you how it's done.”

  If we'd been in our own house, I would have thrown something at her. Instead, I shook my head and said, “Just go to bed.”

  She walked to the door, put her hand on the knob, then stopped. “Look, I'm just giving you a hard time about Ty. You want him, you can have him.” She fingered the knob and stared at me. “I only came here to help you. Maybe you don't buy that, but I did. Even if I can't help, I wanted to make sure you were okay. Because I know that if it had been me that had gotten stranded here, I wouldn't have been okay.” She pulled the door open. “So maybe cut the bitch act with me, alright?”

  I felt a pang of guilt.

  “And Ty.” She ran her fingers through her hair. “Make sure you let me know if you don't want him. Because I do. Maybe you're just not sure how to hook him. I could show you...”

  She closed the door behind her before I could pick up the lamp and hurl it at her.

  THIRTEEN

  I was awake early the next morning after a restless night of sleep. I'd tossed and turned, drifting between dozing and snapping awake, overtaken by memories. They were memories that had been unlocked by my walk on that trail, memories I'd tried to put away forever. When I heard other people begin to stir in the house—the sound of the front door opening, a metal something clanging to the floor in the kitchen, I finally gave up. I pulled on a pair of denim shorts and a tank top, wound my hair into a loose ponytail and went downstairs.

  Ty was already at the breakfast table with his dad and I could hear his mom banging around in the kitchen.

  “Morning,” Ty said, smiling as he held a coffee mug in his hands. His hair was slightly mussed, like he hadn't yet combed it, and stubble covered his chin. It looked like he'd just rolled out of bed and I felt a little shiver of excitement run through me. I didn't want to wonder what it would be like to wake up with him next to me. But I did.

  “Hi,” I said.

  Colin grabbed a slice of toast from a plate on the table. “Sleep alright?”

  “Yes,” I said. I sat down next to Ty. “Thank you.”

  “Your sister was out early,” his dad said.

  This was news to me. I hadn't heard her moving around upstairs. But the front door had opened and the three of them were all still here so it was easy to put two and two together.

  “Running, right?”

  He nodded. “That's what she said.”

  It didn't matter how hungover she was, it didn't matter who she'd slept with, and it didn't matter where she'd woken up. The one consistency in Jenna's life was running. She could've earned a college scholarship if she'd wanted, but she'd quit the cross country team halfway through her freshman year of high school, complaining that the coach was a dick and her teammates were idiots. But she'd continued running, first thing every morning. She'd joked with me one time that it was to blow the smoke out of her lungs. There was probably some truth to that, but I was pretty sure it was more than that. Maybe it was her way of coping, her symbolic way of running away from the past that neither of us could elude.

  Sheila brought in a serving bowl filled with scrambled eggs and a plate of slightly burnt bacon. “Good morning, Lily.”

  “Good morning.”

  She sat down and they all piled their plates with food. I scooped a small serving of eggs and accepted a piece of bacon from Ty as he passed it around the table. But I wasn't very hungry and I didn't do more than nibble.Within minutes, Ty's father excused himself, saying he had some paperwork to attend to. The phone rang and Sheila hurried to answer it and Ty and I were alone.

  “So, what's on tap for today?” he asked as he polished off the last piece of bacon.

  “Car,” I told him. “Gotta figure out what's going on with my car. Then at least I'll have some idea of what I'm dealing with.”

  He nodded. “Sven should be in around nine. I can give you a lift over there if you want. Unless you just want to call and talk to him.”

  “No, I should go in,” I said. “So a ride would be awesome. Thanks.” I picked up the half-full glass of orange juice sitting in front of me and took a sip. “What about you? Any more kittens need rescuing?”

  He shot me a withering look. “None that I'm aware of.”

  “It really is a sweet thing to do,” I said. I meant it. I didn't know very many guys who'd volunteer their time to help a litter of motherless kittens. “You must really like animals.”

  He shrugged and I could see the color creep up his neck. “Been doing it since I was a kid. I like helping. Making a difference.”

  “Is that what you want to do?” I asked. I realized then that I didn't know very much about him. I mean, I knew where he lived and I knew he was a nice guy but I didn't know squat about his goals, his plans, his future. It seemed like an odd thing to wonder about, given the fact that I'd only known him a couple of days, but I couldn't help it. I wanted to know.

  “I don't know what I want to do.” His color had returned to normal and he smiled at me. “Which is sorta why I'm sitting right here.”

  “Did you go to school? After graduating, I mean.”

  He pushed away from the table. “Let's talk outside.�
�

  I suddenly felt bad. “No, it's fine. I don't want to keep you from anything.” I'd just launched into a full-on inquisition and I was pretty sure he'd just been making polite conversation when he'd asked me about my plans.

  “You're not keeping me from anything,” he said. “But it's nice outside and it's supposed to storm later so if we're gonna talk, we should do it where we won't hear my mother cussing in the kitchen.”

  I grinned. Sure enough, his mom had retreated to the kitchen after her phone call and, as if on cue, something clattered to the floor. I followed him through the hallway and out the front door. He sank down on the middle step and I sat down next to him, one step up. My leg brushed his as I positioned myself and the feel of his skin against mine was like a jolt of electricity rocketing through me.

  “School,” he said, picking up where we'd left off. “Uh, I'm not much of the school type.”

  “No?”

  He leaned back so his shoulders were against the railing. “Nah. I mean, I did alright. Got decent grades and stuff. But graduation came and went and I was pretty much done. So I moved to the Cities for a few months. Bussed tables at a couple restaurants, made some decent money, goofed off a lot.” He smiled. “But I missed this.”

  “This?”

  He motioned to the road, to the grove of trees, to the pool where the first visitors were already arriving, a family of four strolling in through the gate, armed with floaties and pool noodles and a stack of brightly colored beach towels.

  “The resort.” He tilted his head back. “The town. The river. Minneapolis is great—tons of green space and water. But it's not this. It's not home.” He straightened and looked at me. “You know?”

  I didn't know but I nodded, anyway. I'd never felt any attachment to my home. Well, maybe at some point I had. But all of that had disappeared when Rosie had died. Home was a constant reminder of what we'd lost, her bedroom door sealed off and closed, everything left untouched, an eery shrine to her memory. I couldn't walk anywhere without being reminded of my youngest sister. Not home, not school, not the tiny town we lived in. Everything held traces of Rosie and I couldn't wait to be rid of them.

  “So, here I am.” He kicked at the lower stair with his flip flop. “Work is steady around here. Don't really have to worry about being fired.” He grinned. “And I like it.”

  “That's all that really matters,” I said.

  He cocked his head. “What about you?”

  “What about me?”

  “School in Madison. Why?”

  “Well, I'm not sure if you're aware, but there aren't a lot of schools in North Dakota.”

  He laughed. “There isn't a lot of anything in North Dakota.”

  He was right about that. My home state felt like a veritable waste land. I didn't know if that was because it really was devoid of anything or because we had turned it into that over the last ten years. Whatever it was, I knew one thing coming out of my two years at the local junior college. I needed to get the hell out of there.

  “You know what you want to study?” he asked.

  “Psychology.”

  “Wow.” He looked and sounded impressed. “Like, be a doctor?”

  A bird screeched overhead and I looked up, startled. A hawk circled the trees and I wondered what prey he saw.

  “A doctor?” I shrugged. I didn't know what I wanted to do with a psychology degree. But it was the only class that held any appeal to me during my stint at the community college. And I might have held on to some illusion that majoring in psychology might do more than just provide a career opportunity. It just might be an avenue to try to fix myself. “I don't think so. Maybe.”

  “Well, you've got time to figure it out,” he said. He was quiet for a minute. “And what about that sister of yours?”

  I snorted. “Jenna? She barely graduated high school. She's got some job lined up at one of those daycare places.”

  Ty raised his eyebrows. “Daycare? Your sister doesn't seem like the daycare type.”

  “No?” I stifled a laugh. “What type does she seem?”

  “Stripper,” he shot back, his eyes full of amusement. Then he sobered and said, “Shit. That was totally out of line. I'm sorry.”

  I held up my hand. “Don't be. You're dead on.”

  A smile played on his lips and I was overwhelmed with the urge to talk to him and sit with him all day. He was funny and easy to talk to and it didn't hurt that the way he looked actually made me ache with wanting.

  I noticed then that eyes were on me and the air suddenly felt charged between us, like a bolt of lightning was hovering just overheard, ready to strike. But the sky was clear, a soft powder blue, not a cloud in sight, and I knew exactly where the electricity was coming from.

  Ty shifted his gaze. “And here she comes,” he said, focusing on the path that cut through the trees.

  And, just like that, the moment was lost.

  I followed his gaze and I heard the footsteps first, then saw Jenna loping along the trail. Her long hair was pulled back away from her face and she had on a pair of black shorts and a matching jogging bra. Her skin was covered in a fine sheen of sweat, her cheeks flushed. Her eyes were focused on the ground in front of her and she seemed startled when she came to a stop and found us sitting on the steps.

  “What are you doing?” she asked, her voice slightly accusatory as she looked from me to Ty and then back to me.

  Talking and staring and wanting to throw this guy down on the steps and attack him, I thought. But Ty answered before I had a chance to.

  “Sitting?” he offered, more amused than anything.

  “I can see that,” she said, still trying to catch her breath. She glanced back over her shoulder, then looked at me, leaning down to put her hands on her knees. “You call on your car?”

  “Not yet,” I said. “Ty's gonna run me over there in a bit and then I'll see what I can find out.”

  “I can take you,” she said.

  It was the first thing I expected her to say and the last thing I wanted. “I'm good.”

  She tucked her chin in so I couldn't see her face and I knew she was probably frowning. “I'll bet,” she muttered. She popped back up, her hands on her hips and stared at Ty. “I run every day.”

  Ty nodded. “Awesome.”

  “Gives me great stamina,” she told him. “And an ass made of steel.”

  “Uh, good for you?” He glanced at me and I pursed my lips so I wouldn't burst out laughing.

  She walked toward us, totally ignoring me now. She put a hand on his shoulder and smiled at him. “I'm gonna go shower.”

  She hopped up the steps past us and let the front door slam shut behind her.

  Ty chuckled. “She could save herself a lot of time and energy if she just asked me to fuck her.”

  His words stung a little because I knew that was exactly what my sister wanted. I just wasn't entirely sure what his answer would be if she offered.

  “Don't think she'd like the answer, though.”

  “No?” I asked.

  He shook his head and smiled at me. “Not interested. In her.”

  My heart sank a little more. “Girlfriend?” I asked. For some reason, I thought back to the name his mom had mentioned when she'd been on speaker that first night he'd called her, when he'd driven us home from my broken-down car. Caroline. And then the next morning, hearing him in the hallway, talking in a hushed voice on the phone. Of course he would have a girlfriend. How could he not?

  “Nope.”

  His eyes stayed on me. I didn't think I was imagining what he was intimating. It occurred to me that maybe I should just chicken out, let the moment pass and not address it. That was what I would have done in the past. But something kept me from doing this, and it wasn't just because Ty Reilly was drop-dead gorgeous. A tiny part of me was beginning to think that maybe I'd gotten stuck in Minnesota for a reason. Maybe it wasn't just a bad motor or a haunting reminder of the past I'd been trying to leave behind. Maybe
there was something good to come from this unexpected layover in the town that had destroyed me ten years earlier.

  Before I could say anything, though, his dad called for him from inside of the house.

  With an urgency that gave me goosebumps.

  Ty jumped to his feet. “Out here!”

  Two seconds later the front door burst open and Colin Reilly appeared, pale-faced, his expression tight. “I need you. Lot 17. The Phillips family.”

  “Why? What's the matter?” Ty asked.

  The phone was clutched so tightly in his hand I thought it might shatter. “Missing girl.”

  My heart stopped.

  Ty's mouth hung open for a minute as he tried to comprehend. “What? Who? Dave's daughter?”

  “The guy from last night?” I asked, pushing myself off the steps.

  His father nodded. “Yeah. Go. I'm gonna call the sheriff's office. I'll meet you down there.” He dashed back inside the house.

  “Shit,” Ty said. “Not again.”

  I swallowed the golf ball-sized lump that had formed in my throat.

  “I gotta go,” he told me.

  I didn't think, just reacted. “I'll come with.”

  “You don't have to,” he said, hopping down the stairs toward the truck.

  But I was right on his heels.

  I was going.

  Again.

  FOURTEEN

  The scene at the campsite was utter chaos.

  Other campers had gathered there, the news of the missing girl having spread like wildfire. Ty immediately found Dave, who was pacing back and forth in front of the tent, his hands on top of his head. A woman in a T-shirt and khaki shorts was crying, the little boy I'd seen yesterday clutching her leg and crying, too. Ty talked quickly with Dave, listening intently, nodding every few seconds. Then he started barking orders at the campers who were gathered around, sending them out in small groups in different directions. They hustled off as ordered. He put a hand on Dave's shoulder and pointed towards the crying woman. I assumed she was his wife and the little girl's mother. An image came back to me, clear as day, of my own mother at a similar campsite. Tan capris, a black v-necked t-shirt. Tears streaming down her face as she scoured the camp site, trying to convince herself out loud that Rosie was just playing a trick on all of us.