Montana Love Letter

by Charlotte Carter

  She checked her notes. “Two bedrooms, one and a half baths, carport. On a quiet street.”

  “You’d probably want to enclose the carport. Winters here aren’t as bad as some places in Montana, but it’s still cold enough that the lake freezes over.”

  She shivered. “Not exactly Seattle weather.”

  “Lots more sunshine, though.”

  True. Clear skies and clean air. She liked that a lot.

  When they stopped in front of the house, Hailey said, “It looks like a doll house.”

  It did—a doll house on a small lot that hadn’t seen an occupant or a lawn mower the entire summer. Broken lawn furniture, chunks of wallboard and other trash were piled by the side of the house.

  They all clambered out of the truck. The girls raced up to the front porch to peer in the window.

  “Oh, ick!” Hailey cried. “It’s a mess in there.”

  Janelle looked through the window. Just like the outside, the inside was a disaster. Janelle’s heart sank. No question—either the former owners or transients had vandalized the place. The carpet had been torn up. Boxes were strewn about, and a hole had been punched in the wallboard beside the brick fireplace.

  Surely she could do better than this.

  Raeanne tugged on her hand. “I don’t like this place.”

  “Neither do I, sweetie. We’ll find something better.” She glanced around the unkempt yard. Her gaze landed on a gnarly old apple tree. “Hey, the house does have one redeeming feature—a crab-apple tree. Let’s pick a few. I’ll add them to the wreath on the front door.”

  The girls scurrying to gather some apples lightened the mood by the time they returned to the truck and drove on to the next house on Janelle’s list.

  Three drive-bys later they stopped in front of a small log cabin. A non-native maple tree in the yard was beginning to change color. A row of cypress trees formed a windscreen on one side of the house.

  “What does it say about this place?” Adam asked.

  “Two bedrooms, one bath and a loft. They call it a ‘cozy vacation home.’”

  Adam lifted his brows. “You want to take a closer look?”

  “Might as well. It looks better than the others we’ve seen.” Cozy was good, she told herself. She could raise Raeanne in a cozy house. Unfortunately, the image that came to her was Adam’s house, which was far larger than this cabin but still cozy in its own way. Unfortunately, Adam’s house did not appear on her list of possibilities.

  Maybe she should have stayed in Seattle. She and Raymond had had a nice house not far from the university. But that place was filled with sad memories for both Janelle and Raeanne. To compound her problems, he had refinanced the house a couple of years ago to put money in an investment that he’d claimed couldn’t fail, until it did. After she sold the house, she was sure that that cash would serve as an adequate down payment for a new house.

  A misjudgment on her part.

  A few drops of rain spattered down on Janelle’s head as she looked in the windows of the cozy cabin. Though small, it appeared neat and livable. Still, her stomach twisted with disappointment. A dream lost.

  * * *

  By the time they got home, the rain was falling steadily and looked as if it would last awhile. The girls and Janelle were playing a board game. Adam decided to work on his reading lessons at the computer.

  He brought up the program and stared unfocused at the screen. He didn’t want Janelle and Rae living in that tiny cabin. They deserved something bigger. More in keeping with what they were used to.

  Something like his house.

  He clicked on the next lesson in sequence. He had to quit thinking about Janelle living with him permanently. That would mean marriage. Why would a woman like Janelle even consider marrying a garage mechanic who couldn’t read worth beans?

  Except now he could follow the ever-cheerful Ollie the Owl’s instructions to pick out the words starting with B: Boy, Box, Buy, But. The letters were finally beginning to make sense. In the lessons, at least. He hadn’t tried reading anything else yet. He figured he was a long way from being ready for prime-time reading.

  Hailey popped up on the chair next to him. “Can I help you with your homework?”

  He angled a glance in her direction. “I thought you were playing a game with Janelle and Rae.”

  She shrugged. “I went bankrupt. Raeanne beat the socks off me.”

  His lips twitched with a smile. “Ah. Tough competition, huh?”

  She grinned. “Sometimes I let her win,” she whispered. “Like Mom used to let me win.”

  He gave her a one-arm hug. “Good for you.”

  “I wish she could live here forever. She needs a big sister to watch out for her and teach her stuff.”

  Just how did Hailey expect him to arrange that? “She’s got her mom. Janelle can teach her what she needs to know.”

  “But Janelle’s old. She can’t remember what it’s like to be a little kid.”

  He sputtered a laugh. “You do know I’m older than she is, don’t you?”

  “That’s my point, Dad. Raeanne needs someone like me who knows about kid stuff. And I...” She turned her head away, but not before Adam caught the glimmer of tears in her eyes. “I need a mom who can teach me grown-up girl stuff.”

  He felt as if he’d been sucker punched. He knew Hailey missed her mother, but he hadn’t realized how much. Or that she was on the lookout for a replacement mom. Someone like Janelle.

  Chapter Sixteen

  On Monday, Janelle took Raeanne for her checkup with Dr. McCandless, a longtime pediatrician in Bear Lake. She was given a clean bill of health, both for her head injury and for enrolling in kindergarten. At lunchtime they all celebrated with root-beer floats.

  When Tuesday rolled around, Adam found himself under an old Chevy that leaked oil. He hadn’t made much progress finding the leak. All he could think about was that Janelle was off with Sharon. House hunting in Polson this afternoon. The girls had gone to a movie matinee with one of Hailey’s friends and her mother, who had promised to keep a close eye on Raeanne.

  Janelle was going to make a decision soon. School registration started next Monday. She wanted to list her new permanent address.

  What was the big deal? She could use his address just as well. Nobody would care.

  He lay there thinking about the smell of grease and oil that was so much a part of his life. Lisa had never cared.

  Granted he cleaned up as best he could when he went in to dinner. But he doubted he washed off all the scent of the garage. The smell of how he made his living. Hardly an enticing aftershave aroma.

  Janelle had never said a word about his smell. He wondered how she felt about it. And him.

  Somebody kicked the bottom of his shoes, which were sticking out from under the car.

  “You gone to sleep under there, boss?”

  Adam winced. “No, I’m not asleep. I’m trying to find the leak.”

  Vern grabbed hold of his legs and pulled him and the creeper out from under the car. “Hey, cut that out!”

  “You been acting funny for two days. Like you got a bellyache or something. You shoulda been able to fix that leak in fifteen minutes. You been under there for an hour. What’s goin’ on?”

  Adam struggled to his feet and wiped his hands on a blue cloth. “None of your business, that’s what.”

  “We got cars stacked up waitin’ to get fixed. You’re gonna ruin your business if you keep actin’ this way.” Vern narrowed his pale blue eyes and wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you was lovesick.”

  Adam took a step back and collided with the car. Sweat broke out on his forehead. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “I’m not
so sure about that. Seems like that pretty little lady and her daughter’s been hanging around here for more’n three weeks now. A man could get used to a thing like that.”

  “You’re out of line, Vern. She’s out hunting a house to buy right now. Soon as she finds something she likes, she’s gone.” A burning sensation scorched a hole in his stomach.

  “And I’m guessing you’ll be one sick puppy when she up and leaves.”

  “Tell you what, old man.” He slammed the wiping cloth onto the concert floor. “You’re so smart, you get under there and fix that leak. I’ve got other work to do.”

  He marched into his office and shut the door. Something he never did. Since the office was all glassed in, closing the door didn’t keep nosy folks from watching him anyway. Keeping an eye on him and coming up with too many questions.

  He switched on the computer. The truth was, he’d been in a blue funk since Sunday afternoon. Hailey wanted a mother. He wanted...what he couldn’t have.

  These had been the shortest three weeks of his life. And yet he felt as if he’d known Janelle forever. After she moved out, she’d only come around when there was some bookkeeping to do. Maybe a couple of mornings a week.

  No more sitting out on the deck or stargazing with her. No chance for sharing hot chocolate on a snowy winter night. No more sitting around the table eating the meal she’d cooked and helping her clean up after dinner.

  He yanked open the file drawer. All those ridiculous red, green and blue file tabs mocked him. She’d created a system she thought he could handle. A system any five-year-old would understand.

  Yeah, he got it. She thought he was about as smart as your average five-year-old.

  “You’re a genius when it comes to fixing cars,” she had said.

  That sure hadn’t been true today.

  By the time Janelle got home, Adam had managed to rouse himself out of his dark mood enough to install an oil filter in a SUV.

  “Aren’t the girls home yet?” she asked as she walked into the garage. She’d worn tan slacks and a peach sweater for her house-hunting efforts. Under the overhead lights, the outfit made her hair shimmer with streaks of red.

  “They should be back soon. I imagine they went for ice-cream cones after the show.”

  “So much for having an appetite for dinner,” she said with a wry smile.

  “How’d it go in Polson?”

  Her shrug was less than enthusiastic. “We saw a couple of houses that would do. But I’d still rather live here. In Bear Lake, I mean.”

  Had that been a slip of the tongue? Here, meaning at his house?

  “I think I’m going to settle on the cozy log cabin we saw on Sunday. It has good year-round insulation and the school bus stops reasonably close. Sharon’s going to talk to the owners. They live in Billings. I gather the wife’s health isn’t too good, so they haven’t used the cabin in a couple of years.”

  “They’d be glad to get it off their hands, I guess.” He looked back at the oil filter and twisted a nut down extra tight. Somebody would have a hard time getting that nut off next time they wanted to change the filter.

  “I’m going to go collapse for a few minutes until the girls get home. I’ll see you for dinner.”

  “Yeah, I’ll be there.” He braced his hands on the SUV’s fender and drew a shaky breath. It wouldn’t be long now before she’d be gone.

  Better start getting used to it now, guitar boy.

  * * *

  His mood was still sour when he went to the Rotary meeting the next day. He shook hands with his friends, endured their jovial back slaps and good humor, but his heart wasn’t in it.

  Charlie sat next to him during lunch. “You look like someone died. Are your folks okay?”

  “I guess. I haven’t talked to them in a couple of weeks.” Longer than that, he realized with a rush of guilt. Maybe he’d call tonight. But what could he say? He had a beautiful woman living in Grandma’s cottage and he didn’t want her to move out? That would get his mother on the next flight to Montana. Probably to help with the wedding plans. A wedding that was as unlikely as Bear Lake freezing over in July.

  “Then what’s going on? You sick or something?”

  He wanted to tell Charlie to lay off him, but he was a good friend. They’d been buddies for a long time. No reason to bite off his head like he had Vern’s yesterday. For which he’d apologized this morning.

  “I guess I’m just tired.”

  “Maybe you need a vacation. I could use one, too. We could both close up shop this weekend. Leave the kids with somebody and go up north. Do some hiking and fishing. The tourists are beginning to thin out now.”

  Adam raised his brows. Under normal circumstances he might do just that. But his life didn’t seem normal at the moment. “Maybe in September when the kids are settled in school.”

  Charlie cut into the sauce-covered chicken breast on his plate. “Guess that’d be better.”

  Adam had eaten about all the chicken and julienned squash he could gag down when Joshua Higgins, dressed as always in a suit and tie, called the meeting to order. He went through the usual run of announcements, pointed out that it was Harry’s birthday, which caused him to drop a five-dollar bill in the health-and-welfare kitty, to the roar of much good-natured laughter.

  “Now then, folks,” Joshua said. “We’ve got a problem. Our nominating committee has come up with a full slate of officers for the coming year except for one rather important slot. No one has agreed to serve as president.”

  Adam tried to shrink into his chair.

  “Owen, would you please present the report from the nominating committee,” Joshua said.

  Owen stood at his place across the room. He thanked his fellow committee members and listed those who had agreed to be nominated for the various club offices.

  “We on the committee had made a unanimous choice for who we wanted to see as president next year. Unfortunately, he declined to accept the invitation. Without a very good reason, I should add.”

  Adam sank down even farther.

  “According to our rules, in the absence of any candidate for an elective position, we can nominate someone from the floor. The chair will now entertain nominations.”

  Immediately, Charlie stood. “I nominate the committee’s unanimous choice for president, Adam Hunter.”

  The members cheered and applauded.

  Adam clinched his fists, ready to punch out his buddy. A muscle in his jaw flexed. “I told you I don’t want the job and won’t take it.”

  “You’re the guy everyone wants. Step up to the plate, man.”

  Adam stood and threw back his chair. “Like I told the committee, the answer is no.”

  Voices all around him started asking why not. Telling him that he’d be great as president. Calling him a chicken.

  His instinct to fight or flee kicked in. He whirled and marched to the door. He wasn’t going to stay around to listen to their catcalls. Listen to them make him the butt of their jokes.

  He reached the door. The members had fallen into stunned silence. In that silence he heard Janelle’s voice: “They’d understand if you told them the truth.”

  Slowly he turned back to the meeting. His heart beating hard, he stood at the end of the table, taking in these men and women who had been his friends. Most were older than him by a dozen or more years. A few were younger. None had been his classmates who had witnessed his failures in school time and again. They were friends who respected him. Who deserved the truth.

  But would they really understand?

  He cleared his throat. “The fact is, I’m not qualified for the job.” Several members started to speak, but he held up his hand asking for quiet. “The president has a lot of jobs to do. A lot of those jobs involve, one way or another, being able to read and writ
e.” The lump in his throat persisted despite his effort to clear it away. “I can’t read and write. I’m dyslexic.”

  No one spoke. There wasn’t a whisper in the room. He imagined whatever respect he’d built in the past thirty-plus years, he’d shattered in one single truthful moment.

  He hung his head. “I’m sorry.”

  He turned to leave again. Charlie stopped him.

  “Don’t go.” He joined Adam at the door. “We didn’t know.”

  “Now you do.”

  “Now we can make some accommodation. Make it work with you as president.”

  A bitter laugh escaped Adam’s chest. A circus horse who could read would work fine.

  Charlie looped his arm around Adam’s shoulders. “If Adam had an assistant who could handle the paperwork, he could lead us as president. He’s got the ideas that will make this club a leader in the Rotary nation. I volunteer to be his assistant.”

  Stunned, Adam shook his head in dismay. “You’re crazy.”

  Apparently the membership didn’t agree. “Let’s hear it for President Hunter!”

  “Hear! Hear!”

  “I move we cast a unanimous vote for Adam and the entire slate of officers.”

  “Aye, aye.”

  The treasurer-elect joined Charlie and Adam. “I’ll coach you on the budget. You’re smart, Adam. You won’t need to read it to understand the numbers.”

  The secretary-elect and program chair added their support for Adam.

  “There you have it, ladies and gentlemen.” Joshua pounded his gavel on the podium. “Our slate of officers for the coming year.”

  Charlie pushed Adam in the direction of the podium. “Get up there, man, and tell us what a great year we’re going to have. I may be your assistant, but I’m sure not going to give your speeches for you.”

  Staggered by the outpouring of support, their friendship and respect, Adam made his way to the podium.

  Joshua shook his hand. “You’ll do fine, son. We’re all proud of you and what you’ve accomplished.” He handed Adam the gavel.

  Conflicting emotions left him speechless. Him? President of the Rotary? That was the biggest joke he’d ever heard. Yet, here he stood, gavel in hand.