An Heir to Bind Them

by Dani Collins

  An imposition? He was truly pathetic if that’s how she thought he regarded holding a happy baby.

  “It’s fine,” he said, disgusted with himself for giving off such an impression, but having a child was still a shock. And he was still so worried about damaging him he preferred to keep her close. If she wasn’t hovering, how would he know he was doing everything right?

  She must have read something in his tone. She glanced toward her laptop with indecision.

  “Go ahead,” he insisted, refusing to be frightened of a kid who couldn’t even stand up on his own. “From what I’ve overheard, this place is still transitioning from good to excellent. You’re doing a stellar job in pushing them gently, by the way. Obviously in your element. They’re lucky to have you.”

  She checked and looked back at him. “Do you mean that?”

  “Of course. I’m not surprised, either. Your knack with this kind of work was obvious to me the first time we met.”

  She cleared her throat. “Thank you. You’re not just anyone. You know what it takes, what the pressures are. Your saying that means a lot.” She gave a tiny sniff and wiped under one eye as she scooped up her laptop and moved into the bedroom.

  Women. He’d like to see a male manager get all soupy from a pat on the back.

  Of course, he was just as bad, still basking in her praise that he was giving his son some enjoyment. The boy had spring-loaded legs, seemingly incapable of tiring.

  His son.

  His chest walls gave an internal shudder as he faced a grinning countenance that seemed both foreign yet familiar. All the babies were crawling their way under his skin, but Zephyr was different. With the other two, it was easier to let himself develop some affection. There wasn’t the same depth of responsibility. He imagined he’d be a fallback for the rest of their lives, attached by bonds that nature cast like a spell for exactly this circumstance: to keep little ones alive if their primary caregiver was absent, but he wouldn’t have to worry about Evie and Androu 24/7 the way he’d worry about Zephyr.

  He took a moment to examine that nagging, anxious sensation. For all his concern that he’d crush this boy’s confidence, the what-ifs about his future were worse. What if he was wet and this neighbor lady didn’t notice? What if Quentin talked Jaya into taking the boy to some third-world country with exotic parasites and deadly spiders? What if something happened to Jaya?

  The way Zephyr chewed a finger and thumb while staring deeply into his eyes—much the same disconcerting way his mother had, as if he trusted him implicitly—was a heart punch. It was as if the little guy was already relying on Theo to make sure all the what-ifs were mitigated. Who else would do it? Theo had a lot of faults, but shirking responsibility was not one of them.

  His guts wobbled, like he’d taken a misstep on a high wire.

  No, he didn’t shirk responsibility. If Jaya had said that to him last night, rather than trying to prod him into admitting an emotional connection to the boy, she might have had him.

  But who would look after Zephyr if something happened to Jaya? He’d seen what babies were like when Mama wasn’t near. They were distressed. He wouldn’t want Zephyr to go through that. Hell, he didn’t want to go through missing Jaya again and he was a full-grown man.

  Swearing under his breath, he tried to take back that thought, but it was acknowledged now. Was that why he was stressing out about Zephyr’s future, he asked himself? Because the tyke was his best excuse to hang on to the mother?

  No. He did not just see Zephyr as a means to an end. When he contemplated walking away from Jaya or Zephyr, everything in him went bleak and gray. His sense of responsibility toward the boy was quickly shifting beyond the desire to provide food and shelter. Quentin might be the better father figure, but Theo couldn’t shake Jaya’s comment that maybe he’d never developed any deep relationships because he didn’t cultivate them.

  It wasn’t fair to Zephyr to not even try, was it?

  Zephyr stopped bouncing and gave an exhausted sigh, like he’d finished chopping a cord of wood. Theo found himself grinning in amusement.

  “Finally worn out?” He settled the boy against his chest where Zephyr let his head droop, fingers still in his mouth and eyelids heavy.

  He wasn’t a man who cuddled, preferring his own space unless he was busy with a woman between the sheets, but there was an addictive quality to a baby’s snuggled warmth against his shoulder. It was a sense of all-powerfulness. Success at creating a moment of contentment for another human being. After a childhood of being found wanting, he wallowed in Zephyr’s unconditional appreciation of having his simplest needs met.

  It’s just Mother Nature’s plan, he tried to dismiss, but a very tiny voice—feminine and lilting with an Indian accent—whispered that maybe it was a father’s nature to be happy when his child was happy.

  Stunned, he swallowed a lump of emotion, hands cradling his son tenderly as the connection between them wound through him like a creeping vine, hooking into his vital organs in such a way there’d be damage to both of them if they were pulled apart.

  Jaya’s quiet voice grew louder, speaking to Evie as she appeared with the girl. Her eyes went soft when she saw him holding Zephyr so close, making Theo feel as though he was out on that high wire again, a brisk gale cutting up the canyon toward him.

  He lowered his gaze. This was too personal a moment to have even Jaya witness.

  “Trade?” he asked in a voice like sandpaper, reluctant to let the boy go, but he was so shaken by his flood of primal instinct to protect and nurture, he let her steal the sleepy baby and tried to distract himself by coaxing a smile from Evie with a promise of a swim later.

  It was soon back to chaos, Androu waking shortly after Evie and both of them hungry. He was washing mashed banana out of Androu’s hair, using the wet cloth to spike it into a Mohawk, wondering if he was getting the hang of this parenting thing after all, when a knock at the door interrupted them.

  Jaya was in her room, answering emails while Zephyr napped in there with her. He sidled to the peephole and saw Nic, Rowan and Adara distorted by the fisheye lens.

  Never one to appreciate unexpected visitors, he snapped open the door. “Why didn’t you call?”

  “Are they okay? Where are they?” The women rushed past him like fans into a rock concert, invading his space.

  Nic entered at a more laconic pace, scanning the suite in the way of someone who made his living by sharp observations.

  Theo suppressed a prickle of irritability. The place was littered in toys and dirty dishes. Much as he didn’t really care about being judged over something like that, he also made it a habit to keep from providing opportunities to be judged.

  “They were anxious so I chartered a helicopter,” Nic said. “Gideon had to stay with the ship. Everyone is okay, but what a mess. I don’t envy him. There’s my girl.” He broke into a wide smile as he caught Evie reaching from Rowan’s arms into his.

  “It’s not that we didn’t trust you, Theo. We just missed them so much,” Rowan said, her light touch on his arm apologetic.

  He gave a jerky shrug, subtly removing himself from her uninvited touch even though he didn’t hate it. She was nice enough and being sincere. It was just he wasn’t at his best, accosted by a lot right now with their unexpected visit and a distant, illogical disappointment he didn’t want to examine. He didn’t need her standing too close, sensing his tension, reading his vibe for him.

  “It’s fine, I understand,” he said, and strangely, kind of did. His chest filled with pressure at the way his sister was smothering the life out of Androu. Her eyes were closed, her lashes wet. He had a new understanding of how precious their babies were to them and was suffused with a weird self-conscious pride that he’d been able to keep their offspring safe for them, whether they had really trusted him to do so or not.

 
“I knew he’d be fine. He knows you,” Adara said, voice thick. “But Gideon threw you into the deep end with both of them. I’m glad you called Jaya—she’s perfect—but what made you think of her? How did you know she was here? Where is she?”

  Before Theo could get past the suffocation provoked by questions about Jaya, she said, “I’m here.”

  They all turned toward her voice.

  “Sorry,” she said with a flash of anxious eyes at Theo. “The commotion woke him and he needs a drink.”

  Zephyr looked sweaty and flushed, hair damp and pushed up in tufts around the face he buried in Jaya’s neck to hide.

  Theo moved to fetch the boy’s cup, distancing himself from something he didn’t want to face, then kicked himself just as quickly. This was exactly the kind of abandonment he would hate himself for inflicting on his son. Or Jaya, for that matter.

  “I’m sorry we spoiled his nap,” he heard Rowan say and glanced across to see her peeking at the boy over his mother’s shoulder. “What’s your name?”

  “Baby Zepper,” Evie provided from her happy perch on Nic’s bent arm.

  “Zephyr,” Jaya corrected softly, smiling at Evie. “You’ve been my best little helper, haven’t you? She’s been very sweet with both of them.”

  “Zephyr,” Rowan repeated. “That’s lovely. Greek god of wind, right?”

  Theo absorbed the meaning, wondering if it was a deliberate reference to his love of piloting, thinking, I really don’t deserve her, as he crossed with Zephyr’s sipping cup.

  “Thanks,” Jaya said with a flickering gaze of apprehension as he approached. She rubbed Zephyr’s back to get his attention. “Want your cup, sweetie?”

  Zephyr lifted his head and spied the cup, but rather than wait for Jaya to take it, he leaned out for Theo.

  Theo was getting used to the boy’s impulsive launches. He caught him in what was becoming a practiced scoop and hitched him up against his chest. The air in his lungs stopped moving as he held the cup for the boy, aware of how telling his actions were, how much like a father he must appear. How close a copy of Androu Zephyr was.

  Zephyr’s little hands settled over his big one while profound silence fell over the room like a dome.

  Theo forced himself to lift his gaze and meet each pair of stunned eyes. They had to be reading guilt in him. It sprang from ignoring Jaya’s attempts to contact him and thinking he could ignore someone as important as his son. He was ashamed of himself, not Zephyr.

  Disgust with himself made him blurt, “He’s mine,” aware that it was the clumsiest possible way he could have announced it, but he couldn’t dance around it. Not when Nic was drilling him a look that said, You lucky bastard.

  His half brother blinked and the envy was gone, replaced by a doting smile at Evie, but it was the reinforcement Theo needed to keep inching across the hot coals cooking him from the soles of his feet to his collar. Maybe he wasn’t doing this well, but he’d figured out what was right and he’d do that much.

  In his periphery, he saw Jaya lift an uncertain hand then fold her arms defensively. Don’t, he wanted to say. Don’t be embarrassed for me. I don’t care how stupid I look, only that I not fail where it counts.

  Over Zephyr’s loud gulps, Androu made a noise and put out his hand.

  “I told you before, sport,” Theo said, trying to sound normal while emotions log-jammed in his throat. “Yours is the green one. It’s on his tray,” he told Adara, nodding to the high chair where Androu had been sitting before she arrived.

  He hoped she’d move away and begin to defuse this charged moment, but she didn’t. Her gaze was fixed on Zephyr’s face.

  The boy looked at her with his unblinking brown eyes. Makricosta eyes.

  “Theo.” She spoke his name with myriad inflections. Shock, awe, surprise, approval. Exasperated disapproval.

  As he braced himself for whatever she would say, he felt a feminine hand rest on his biceps. Jaya. If he’d had a free hand, he would have wrapped it around her waist and pulled her in close. He might be willing to face the scrutiny of his family without apology, but it wasn’t easy. How such a slight woman could be his shield against them, he didn’t understand, but he had an intense need to wield her in just that way.

  “He didn’t know,” Jaya said. The tips of her fingers dug into his tense arm. “Not until I told him yesterday.”

  Had it only been a day?

  He drew in a breath, realizing he’d neglected to take in air for several seconds. Looking into Jaya’s eyes, he let her know she didn’t have to protect him that much. It was his own damned fault he hadn’t known about his son.

  It’s okay, she seemed to reassure with a softening of her touch on his arm. Our secret. And therein lay her appeal. He feared every stumble, too used to being knocked down a second time for daring to err. She was a forgiving person, though. She was so softhearted, she’d help him to his feet after a face-plant. He wanted to kiss her for it.

  Hell, he wanted to kiss her, period. He dragged himself free of their locked stare in time to hear Rowan ask Nic, “Will it be a full Indian wedding, do you think? I’ve always wanted to go to one.”

  Jaya’s touch on his arm fell away.

  Theo stiffened, struck anew by rejection.

  “I’m making assumptions, aren’t I?” Rowan said with a blush and a reach for her daughter. “Come on, Evie, let’s find Androu’s cup for him.”

  “I’ll help,” Nic said, taking Androu as he passed Adara. “Drink, champ?”

  Jaya watched the Viking blond media mogul and his petite wife distance themselves toward the kitchen, leaving Adara staring at their ill at ease vignette.

  Zephyr was comfortable enough, she supposed, taking a break from draining his cup to huff a breath and stare after his cousins, but she was hyper-conscious of Theo statue-stiff next to her.

  “Will he come to me?” Adara asked, approaching with hands raised.

  Her intense focus, the way she caught her breath as Zephyr went to her, the way she enfolded him and pressed her smile into his hair, all made Jaya want to turn her crinkling forehead into Theo’s chest.

  Having Zephyr accepted by Theo’s sister was beyond her dreams. She wished she’d known it would go this well or she might have tried harder to reach him. She might have gone directly to Adara.

  “I should have—” Jaya began.

  “Don’t.” He caught her wrist. “I should have,” he said, as if he knew what she’d been about to say. His hand slid to mesh with hers, palm to palm, fingers entwined.

  It was such a startling gesture she could only cling to him, at sea as to how to react. He’d surprised her by claiming Zephyr so openly when she’d been expecting to be treated like a dirty little secret. Having him hold her hand as if there was something between them besides a baby was a kind of magic she knew she shouldn’t believe in, but she wanted to.

  “I never thought I’d hold your baby,” Adara said with a misty smile. “I hoped Androu would rub off on you, but— Wait a minute. How old is he?” She pulled back to study the boy, eyes narrow as she lifted them to Theo’s culpable swallow.

  “It was—” Jaya started to excuse, but Theo squeezed her hand. Her entire being was warmed by his firm grip, radiating heat up her arm and into her chest.

  “I’m not going to offer excuses—or details. Fire me if you have to,” Theo said.

  Adara gave him a look between stern and maddened. “I’ll assume that if you deserved to be fired, you’d say so. Demitri is the one that needs reminders about employees being off-limits. Besides, I can’t be mad. We have a nephew. Gideon will be over the moon.” She smiled at Zephyr as the boy reached for Jaya, letting him go.

  Jaya had to pull her hand free of Theo’s to take Zephyr and secure him on her hip.

  In the carefully emotionless way that Jaya was mor
e familiar seeing in Adara she heard her ask Theo, “What are your plans?”

  In the blink of one glance, a lot of teeming undercurrents were exchanged between brother and sister. It niggled at Jaya in a way she couldn’t interpret. They seemed almost telepathic and it made her feel left out.

  She imagined there were considerations with regards to the Makricosta fortune, though. Publicity to finesse and old-fashioned concern for family. Given Theo’s dismay at learning he was a father, she expected him to request Zephyr’s existence be kept quiet.

  With an impactful look at Jaya, Theo became super tall, his posture and air very authoritative. She’d seen him take a hard line when it came to accounting rules, but had never seen him turn such an uncompromising look on her.

  “I don’t want to miss any more of Zephyr’s life than I have,” he said.

  Oh. Jaya’s heart fluttered, surprised by this evolution in his attitude. He’d been tentative yesterday, but she supposed that had been shock. This morning he’d seemed to accept he had a son, even if it had still been a perplexing addition to his life.

  Now she could see acknowledgment had moved into something more implacable that was both heartening and threatening. It had never occurred to her that she might have to fight him for her child, but she saw something in his eyes that was resolute and possessive. Something that told her Zephyr had taken up residence inside him in a way she’d been dreaming of doing since Day One.

  Why did that make her jealous? She ought to be happy.

  “We haven’t agreed on how we’re moving forward,” Theo continued. “But whether it’s a big wedding or not—I’ll be pushing for marriage.”

  CHAPTER NINE

  THE WORDS CAME between them in an eclipse-like flash. For a second Jaya couldn’t breathe, couldn’t see.

  No. She’d already told him no. Hadn’t he heard her? But what she’d really been refusing was a marriage of convenience. If he loved her... Did he?

  And how could he just announce it like that to his sister without consulting—without even asking her first?