Clark, Rachel - Alicia's Awakening (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour)

by Rachel Clark

  He was almost tempted to grab her out of the shower and put her in her chair. Her chair—that was how he’d come to think of it.

  He scrubbed a hand down his face. In a few hours she wouldn’t even be his sub anymore. He had to get a grip. She was just like any other sub he’d trained over the years. When her training was finished, he would let her go.

  Now, if he could just think that thought without anxiety gripping his belly and disappointment clawing at his heart.

  Chapter Sixteen

  I slide into the newly made bed with fresh, clean sheets and finally realize that the whole time I’ve been here I’ve done no housework. I know Doug has a housekeeping service that comes in twice a week when he’s working, but he told me that he cancels them when he’s on vacation. Since I got here, Doug has literally done everything—cooking, cleaning, and taking care of me.

  I’m a little surprised at how selfish I’ve been. The least I could have done was offer to help. How many times has he sat me on the stool in the kitchen and ordered me to bring myself to orgasm while he does the dishes? Okay, so he has a dishwasher, but still…

  For now I’ll do as my Dom says, but I plan to speak to him about letting me help more.

  Unless… Is that what he wants? Maybe being in charge and doing everything his way is part of his Dom personality. And I certainly can’t argue that he enjoys watching me shatter on that damn stool each time. I shudder at the memories. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to sit on a stool again without remembering each and every mind-blowing orgasm that Doug has given me.

  Somewhere along my musings I must have fallen asleep because I wake to find my arm being fastened to the chain at the top of the bed. I wriggle my legs and realize they’re already locked into place.

  “Doug?” I whisper sleepily. I’m certain it’s him but I seem to have been dreaming about Lachlan, so the abrupt transition is a little confusing. It’s also a little concerning that I’m still dreaming about my best friend when I’m sure I’ve fallen irrevocably in love with Doug as well.

  “Yes, little sub,” Doug says reassuringly. “I have a gift for you.”

  “A gift, Sir?” I ask hopefully as all sorts of wild ideas run through my head. Never let it be said that I don’t have an overactive imagination.

  “But first…” he says as he climbs onto the bed between my thighs. He doesn’t finish the sentence, but the first touch of his tongue has me lifting off the bed. Oh boy, there is a definite difference between oral with a dental dam and oral without that soft latex barrier. He pries the lips of my pussy open wide, then licks up to my clit, reverses direction, and stabs his tongue into my channel. Over and over he torments me, growling at me to behave each time I’m on the verge of coming. God, I’m strung so tightly I can barely breathe, but there’s no way I can defy him. He’s become my world, my center, my anchor.

  I cry out when the door chime rings through the apartment.

  Now?

  Someone is visiting now?

  I want to sob as Doug levers himself off the end of the bed.

  “Back in a moment,” he says with a smile. I get the impression he meant it to be a wicked grin, but he didn’t quite pull it off. Perhaps he senses my disquiet because he cups my face, tries a slightly more genuine grin and adds, “Stay here.”

  Uh-huh. Considering how well my Dom likes to restrain me, I’m not going anywhere.

  He winks as he leaves the room, his face still shiny with my juices. A part of me is terrified that he’ll answer the door like that. A larger part hopes that he will.

  My heart almost stops beating when I hear a familiar voice.

  “Hi, Lachlan,” Doug says in that friendly, calm way he has of talking. Nobody who knew him outside the BDSM lifestyle would realize how bossy he is. Even I hadn’t believed him until he’d spanked my ass and forced me to come. Fuck, talk about birth by fire. I hadn’t even considered any kinky type of sex before Doug. Now I doubt I could think of sex without it.

  Maybe it’s even why I fantasize about Lachlan joining us.

  I feel my pussy pulse, my juices leaking onto my already-wet thighs, but then I close my eyes and think about how shocked Lachlan would be. He’s been my best friend all my life. I can’t imagine my future without him. It’s why I’ve never confessed what I feel for him. My heart pounds heavily, the sharp ache testament to how much our friendship means to me.

  But Doug is important to me now, too.

  “Am I on time?” Lachlan asks Doug. On time for what? I have no idea what he’s talking about and I start worrying that Doug made plans and then forgot them. Fuck, what could he have forgotten?

  “Your timing is perfect,” Doug says as he closes and locks the front door. I can hear the clunk of Lachlan’s heavy boots on the tiled floor as he and Doug walk across the living area, but as the footsteps draw closer to the bedroom I can feel panic drilling through my belly. Surely Doug remembers I’m naked in here. To say I’m not dressed for visitors is a huge fucking understatement.

  “Sir,” I whisper in distress as his broad shoulders fill the doorway. I can’t see Lachlan yet, but I know he’s there. I plead with my eyes for Doug to at least cover me with the quilt. He glances at the discarded bedding, clearly understanding what I’m asking, but shakes his head and gives me a sad smile.

  “I’m afraid this submissive is feeling rather shy today, Lachlan. Perhaps you can do something to help her relax.”

  “Of course, Master Doug,” he says with a dip of his head as he steps through the doorway.

  My pussy is creaming, my breasts are pulled tight, every inch of me is tingling in anticipation, but yet, my mouth is hanging open in surprise.

  Lachlan is one of the most dominating men I’ve ever met. I think it’s partly what attracted me to Doug’s dominating personality in the first place, but I have absolutely no idea why he’s addressing Doug like that. I know they’re friends, but even though I’ve talked to him every night he’s been away, I’ve never discussed mine and Doug’s kinky Dom-sub sex life with Lachlan. Yet, when he looks at me, he doesn’t seem the least bit surprised.

  Of course, when he steps into the room, his gaze on my wide-open pussy, I can’t help but moan. Maybe I fell asleep and I’m really only dreaming. I mean, how the hell would Doug know my deepest, wildest, most frightening fantasy?

  Lachlan’s gaze reaches my face, a frown marring his handsome features for a moment. He looks confused, maybe upset, and I’m worried I’ve hurt him with my reaction.

  “What is her safe word, Master Doug?” he asks as if I’m not in the room.

  “Cabbage,” Doug says with a grin. He finally knows the story behind my choice of safe words. It’s obvious by Lachlan’s wide smile that he remembers the “cabbage incident” all too well. It sure put me off watching scary movies. There’s just something about knocking over a display full of cabbages a few hours after watching a show filled with killer-cabbage-type aliens that leaves an impression on a girl.

  Lachlan gives me a wide smile, and I find myself relaxing just a little.

  Well, I was sort of relaxing, but when his fingers softly trace over my foot and then skim over my trapped leg, circle around the knee, and then move up to my inner thigh, relaxation is the last thing on my mind.

  I tremble violently when he swirls his fingers through the slippery juices coating my thighs.

  “Would you like to use your safe word, sub?” Doug asks as he also steps into the room.

  “N–No, Sir,” I manage to force out between panting breaths. I’ve dreamed of this for a long time. I never thought it would happen—especially now that Doug and I are nearly at the end of our contract—but I’m sure as hell not walking away. I have the insane urge to giggle. Considering the restraints, walking away is not really a choice figuratively or literally.

  “Good girl,” Doug says as he glides his hand up my other leg and joins Lachlan’s fingers between my thighs. But then he drops the Dom façade for just a moment and sits on the bed watching
my eyes as he talks. “I know that your experience before we met was rather vanilla.” He reaches out, touches my face, smiles at whatever he can see in my expression. “But I was hoping that you would let me stay while your new Dom introduces himself.”

  “Yes,” I whisper, a little frightened to talk too loudly in case my fantasy dissolves before my eyes. My best friend is a Dom? Lachlan grins and releases a breath I hadn’t noticed he’d been holding. He leans forward and presses a kiss to my lips.

  “Thank you, Alicia,” Doug says as he also moves to press a kiss to my mouth. “I promise you won’t regret it.”

  Hell, regret is the furthest thing from my mind.

  Lachlan presses a kiss to my mouth again, this time lingering longer, tracing the seam of my lips with his tongue before pushing past my teeth. He explores with his tongue at the same time that his fingers move higher, caressing over my hairless pussy, before thrusting inside me. I gasp, my body reacting out of proportion to the physical stimulus. I’m almost embarrassed to realize I’m on the verge of coming.

  I can feel Doug’s warm lips nibbling gently at my breasts, his hand still caressing my inner thigh as Lachlan slowly finger-fucks me. It’s almost lazy, a soothing, relaxed movement in and out of my already-throbbing pussy. When thick fingers push in beside his, I gasp, trying to move against my bonds.

  “Please,” I whisper, not even certain what I’m pleading for.

  “Soon,” Doug promises as he pushes his fingers farther inside me. “First Lachlan is going to fuck you with his tongue. Isn’t that right, Lachlan?”

  Lachlan gives me a quick look, breaking the moment by not answering straightaway. But I can sense his concern that this will change things between us. It’s obvious that he knew why he was coming here tonight, but maybe the reality is more overwhelming than he’d realized.

  “Please,” I whisper again, a sharp slap landing on my thigh for talking without permission. But it’s enough. Lachlan gives me a bright smile and then turns his full attention to Doug.

  “Yes, Master Doug,” Lachlan says as he immediately moves to lie between my legs. The first touch of his warm tongue has me lifting off the bed. I gasp, dragging in a sharp breath as Doug slaps the outside of my thigh again.

  “Stay still, sub, or I will get the knee straps.”

  I nod my agreement and force my legs to relax. Doug knows I hate the knee straps. The one and only time he used them I freaked out. They make me feel even more vulnerable than being spread-eagled. There’s just something that terrifies me when I’m pressed completely flat against the mattress. It’s something I’ve promised Doug I will work on, but so far I haven’t been able to give up that last little bit of control.

  But right now I force myself to lie passively, waiting for Lachlan to continue. He presses his hands to my thighs, throwing his weight against me, holding me down just that little bit more. But instead of feeling frightened, I’m actually glad for the help. Doug’s soft groan says that he noticed my lack of fear as well.

  “Bring her to orgasm,” Doug says in that bossy tone I’ve grown to love. “Your sub deserves a reward for being so brave.”

  I hear the way Doug described me. Your sub. Not mine. Not ours. Yours. I want to ask. I need to understand, but then Lachlan gives me a loving smile that makes me warm and tingly all over, and then dips his head to my pussy. Suddenly warm and tingly is not enough. Nowhere near enough.

  His slick tongue flicks over my already-swollen, throbbing clit, the firm touch sending electricity arcing through my body. I lift off the bed again, straining to get closer, grateful for the weight he’s pressing against my thighs, controlling my movements, forcing me to do what Doug has ordered. Lachlan wriggles his tongue through my folds, licking and sucking as wave after wave of liquid heat pounds through my blood.

  Oh. My. God.

  I scream as he forces me into orgasm, my legs and arms quivering in their bonds, my pussy muscles clenching and releasing as the extraordinary feeling goes on and on and on. I can barely breathe as heat bursts through me, the flying, soaring, spiraling sensation taking me higher than ever before.

  Finally, I seem to float back into my body. Doug has his rough, calloused hand against my face, the gentle touch so at odds to his usual demanding manner.

  “You love him, don’t you?”

  Fear streaks through me. Yes, I love Lachlan. He’s my best friend. Always has been. But I’ve fallen for Doug, too. I can’t imagine a future without him, either. But somehow this feels like good-bye. If I say yes, will Doug walk away? If I lie and say no, will I lose my best friend?

  My hesitation hurts them. I can see it in their eyes, but I have no idea how to fix it.

  Hell, I must be the most selfish person on the planet. How can I even think about keeping them both?

  “Alicia,” Doug says again, “do you love Lachlan?” This time his words are more forceful, his tone more dominating, his near growl demanding an immediate response.

  I shake all over as I try to answer. “Yes,” I finally whisper, but neither man looks happy.

  “Alicia,” Lachlan says as he moves to sit beside me. His face is still covered in my juices, his lips still shiny from my cream. “It’s okay. I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember, but if the timing’s bad…”

  It’s the declaration of love I’ve always dreamed of, but it feels wrong. I want more. God I am so fucking selfish. I see Lachlan glance at Doug, and it’s obvious they aren’t getting the reaction they expected. Something passes between them, some sort of unspoken communication, the type only experienced Doms seem capable of.

  I recognize him now. My best friend. The man who has never tried a relationship with me. Doug was the experiment. A chance to test the water without revealing Lachlan’s kinkier needs.

  Fuck.

  I don’t know what to say. My mind is racing a million miles an hour, thoughts winking in and out of my brain faster than I can process them. Did Doug ever care? Was I just a test? A favor to a friend? It felt so real. Surely I couldn’t have mistaken his emotions. Could I? Did I? And what about Lachlan? If he loved me, would he really set me up this way? Is the emotional torture a test? The torment of wanting and not having? Of having but not being wanted? Why would they do this to me? Does either of them actually care? Do they even know how to love?

  It barely registers when my bonds are undone, my limbs massaged to get the blood flowing once more. I don’t even resist when Lachlan drags me facedown over his lap. The first slap of his hand has me howling in pain. Fuck. But it stills my brain, gives me something to focus on, shows me a way to push through the confusion. The next slap is harder, my whole body shaking as instinct kicks in and I desperately try to crawl away.

  But both men hold me trapped, my ass burning in agony as Lachlan’s hand comes down again and again. Slowly I stop fighting them, loud sobs escaping my throat as I cry and surrender over his lap. Finally my mind begins to float away, the slaps on my ass no longer painful, now eagerly awaited, anticipated, needed. I hover between awake and asleep, my emotions still raw but no longer overwhelming.

  “Do you love me, Alicia?” Lachlan asks again.

  “Yes,” I answer immediately, my brain unable to provide anything but the truth.

  “Do you love Doug?”

  I nod my head against Lachlan’s leg, the exhaustion pulling at me even as I whisper the word “yes.”

  “Sleep, little sub,” Doug says as he takes me into his arms, lays me on the bed, and then curls around me like he’s been doing the past two weeks. I nod my head tiredly. I feel safe here, loved, wanted. Yet there was something I needed to explain, something pivotal, something important, but fatigue pulls at me, and like a good sub I do as my Dom says.

  * * * *

  Doug could barely contain his own reaction to what had just happened. He knew Alicia had grown attached to him over the past few weeks. It was nearly impossible for a new sub to not fall a little bit in love with her first Dom, but he hadn’t realized it had pro
gressed so far.

  For him.

  Not for her. Her attachment to him was explainable. He was the experienced Dom. He’d understood it, but had ignored it, denied her reactions, convinced himself that he wasn’t really seeing what he thought he was seeing. He’d never used the words, had tried to stay focused on Lachlan’s request for help, had never even used the words “I love you” out loud in his life.

  But he’d fallen in love with her anyway.

  And she’d fallen for him.

  “I’m sorry,” he felt compelled to say.

  Lachlan tilted his head slightly, and gave him a twisted sort of smile. “Happens,” he said with what was probably supposed to be a careless shrug. But there was nothing careless about it. Lachlan had loved this girl his entire life. He’d only asked for Doug’s help because he’d believed his best friend would never accept his way of life.

  But the truth had been far from it.

  Alicia was a natural sub, not only wanting to be dominated, but also needing it to help her function in day-to-day life. How she’d managed to hide that side of her from an experienced Dom like Lachlan had been unfathomable. But under Doug’s tutorage she’d blossomed, embracing a lifestyle she’d probably never imagined but which suited her perfectly.

  “She said she loves us both,” Lachlan said as he sat down on the side of the bed and stroked a hand over Alicia’s face. “Do you believe her?”

  Doug wanted to say out loud all the reasons why she’d probably confused infatuation and submissive needs with love, but in his heart he didn’t agree. To have hidden her needs from Lachlan for so long proved that she was a strong person who knew her own mind. She might have moments of sheer overwhelming emotion like she’d had moments ago before Lachlan had spanked her, but until Doug had come along and shown her a different way to cope, she’d handled them just fine.