Acheron Highway: A Jonathan Shade Novel

by Gary Jonas

  “Just smash them apart and don’t let them get past us. The faster we can dispatch them, the better.”

  “I can get rid of a bunch of them fast with my truck, but that’s not as much fun.”

  “Do it. I’ll handle any that get past you.”

  “The sacrifices I make for you,” he said.

  He tossed the sword to her and walked out the door. I heard a crashing sound.

  Kelly raced over and peered out the door. “They’re almost here,” she said. “Brand is smashing some of them apart as he gets to his truck.”

  The sound of his truck roaring to life drowned out the marching feet. Then I heard a crashing, smashing, crunching sound that will stay with me for as long as I live. It kept going.

  Kelly backed up to the center of the dojo. “He’s getting most of them, but we’ll be in the thick of it in three…two…one…”

  The glass door shattered, and skeletons poured into the dojo.

  As they passed the long tables, they each grabbed a weapon. Skeletons armed with swords, sais, daggers, and scimitars moved forward, and only Kelly stood between us.

  The clang of steel on steel rang loud in the room.

  My breath came fast but shallow, and I couldn’t seem to get enough air. Anxiety wrapped its loving arms around my brain, and I wanted to scream. My body shivered but deep inside, I knew Kelly would never let anything happen to me. Just this once, I wanted to tell her it was OK to let them through. It didn’t matter anymore. But I couldn’t find my voice, so she kept fighting.

  As many times as I’ve seen her in action, she never failed to amaze me. She swung the sword, lopping off arms and skulls. She spun and kicked, and although there had to be thirty or forty armed skeletons attacking, she made it all look simple. She blocked and parried and hacked. She kicked and punched. She swept legs. One tried to slip past her while she parried a sword, but she spun quickly and punched through the rib cage with her left hand and clutched the bastard’s spine. She braced her sword hand against the remains of the rib cage and pulled the spine free of the rest of the skeleton. Bones skittered on the floor. She tossed the sword aside and swung the spine around like Indiana Jones with his bullwhip. She swung high and the spine shattered but took four or five skulls with it.

  She grabbed one of the skeletons, flipped it sideways, and drove forward while twirling the entire skeleton in a figure eight. One of them slipped past, but before it had taken three steps, she threw a skull and cracked its neck. The skeleton hit the floor and shattered, and the bones slid toward us but stopped a few feet away.

  About that time, Brand entered the dojo again carrying a baseball bat. He smacked skulls. At one point, I thought I heard him yell, “Hulk smash!” but that might be the delirium talking.

  Moments later, the last skeleton hit the floor. The dojo was littered with bones, most of them piled in a semicircle in front of Kelly.

  “That was fun,” Brand said. “My truck is dented all to hell, but sign me up for round two.”

  “Later,” Kelly said. “Right now we’re getting Jonathan to a hospital.”

  Kelly lifted me and maneuvered around the piles of bones as she carried me to Walter’s car. “You’re going to be all right,” she said. “I’m here for you.”

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  When I first opened my eyes, Persephone stood above me, gazing down with her hair hanging around her like a dark waterfall of blood. Was I dreaming? Were my eyes even open? Was I dead? I tried to look around, but I couldn’t move my head. She placed a finger on my lips.

  “Don’t try to speak. Just listen.”

  I blinked but the world still seemed out of focus except for Persephone’s face. She was lovely and I stared into her green eyes and thought how nice it would be to have a picnic with such a beautiful woman. I wanted to reach up and caress her face, but my arms wouldn’t move.

  I heard a steady beeping sound, but it seemed far away.

  “I’m not known for my patience,” Persephone said. “I’ve given you time to bring Charon to me, but instead you searched for a way to prevent my loyal spirits from having vessels. I do not appreciate that. I want Charon. Bring him back to me, and everything will be fine.”

  “You’re really pretty,” I said.

  “You’re very annoying,” she said. “Don’t try to speak. You have three days to bring Charon to me. If you fail, I will kill you. Do you understand?”

  “Why wait? Go ahead and kill me now.”

  She stared into my eyes for a long time then nodded. “I changed my mind. I won’t kill you. Instead I’ll kill all of your friends. Charon or Sharon may be your friend, but now you have the choice. Do you want to lose one friend or all of your friends?”

  “Is this a trick question? What are you doing Friday night?”

  “You have three days.”

  She pulled back from me, and I saw light. The light grew brighter for a moment then shimmered and faded. I drifted back to sleep, not sure I’d even been awake at all.

  #

  The next time I opened my eyes, I saw Esther staring down at me.

  “Poor little bunny,” she said. “I thought we’d lost you.”

  “Where am I?”

  I felt a hand on my arm, and I slowly turned my head to see Kelly sitting on the edge of my hospital bed. Tubes went from a metal stand into an IV in my hand.

  “You’re at St. Anthony’s. You lost a lot of blood,” Kelly said.

  I blinked a few times. “I feel like I was tossed off the Empire State Building...twice.”

  “You got your ass kicked.”

  “They almost bumped you off,” Esther said.

  Kelly held a bottle of water for me. It had a straw in it, and after a few attempts, I managed to get the damn thing in my mouth. The water tasted like heaven.

  “The nurse will be by in a few minutes to check on you,” Kelly said. “They’re taking very good care of you. You had a transfusion, so you should feel a lot better. Well, except for the bruises. And the stitches.”

  “I thought I was going to die again.”

  “I won’t let that happen.”

  “Neither will I,” Esther said.

  “Is it safe here? No more skeletons?”

  “So far it’s been quiet.”

  I touched the bandage on my throat. “This as bad as it feels?”

  “It’s going to leave a pretty cool scar.”

  “Chicks dig scars.”

  Kelly nodded. “And how many people can say they had their throat ripped open by a walking skeleton?”

  The nurse entered the room. She was a slender black woman with kind eyes. “Welcome back to the land of the living, Mr. Shade. I’m Ree and I’ll be on duty all night. If you need anything, you hit the call button and either I or my CNA, Vanessa, will be right here.”

  “When can I get out of here?” I asked.

  She smiled. “I think the doctor will release you tomorrow. Your blood pressure is good; you don’t have a fever.”

  “And I don’t have insurance.”

  “As I understand it, your bill is covered.”

  I looked at Kelly.

  “I called Sharon,” Kelly said.

  “Can I get you anything? The kitchen is closed right now, but we have sandwiches.”

  “I’m starving.”

  “I’ll be right back,” Ree said.

  “She’s cute,” I said after she left.

  “She’s married,” Kelly said.

  “Figures. So what did Sharon say?”

  “She wanted to come back, but I told her to hold off for now.”

  “Good.”

  Ree returned with a roast beef sandwich. It hurt to swallow, but that sandwich was surprisingly good. She went back to her station.

  “I’ll be right back,” Kelly said.

  “Where are you going?” I asked.

  “I have a bad feeling that as soon as someone dies here, their body is going to be snatched by some Underworld spirit and you’ll be in danger.
”

  “As much as I don’t want anyone to die, if a body comes after me, don’t destroy it. I want to send a message to Persephone if I can.”

  She nodded. “I can incapacitate any attackers. No problem.”

  She leaned over and kissed my cheek then turned to go.

  “Kelly?”

  She turned back to face me. “Yes?”

  “Thank you.”

  She gave me a nod, held my hand for a moment, then left the room.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  They released me the next morning with a clean bill of health. Fortunately no dead bodies attacked during the night, and there were no skeletons waiting for us when we left the hospital. Assuming I hadn’t been dreaming, Persephone was true to her word. Kelly pushed the wheelchair to the door, and I hopped up and walked out under my own power.

  My neck throbbed, but it wasn’t too bad. It was snowing when we stepped outside. “Where are you parked?” I asked.

  “I’m not. Brand will be swinging by in a moment to pick us up.”

  “Maybe we should wait inside.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I’m freezing my nuts off.”

  “Man up.”

  A valet shot me a look. I guess it was uncool of me to complain to a woman. Of course, Kelly’s nerves were magically engineered, so while she can detect heat and cold, she doesn’t really feel them. The valet had on a North Face jacket and gloves and probably thermal underwear. I wore jeans, a button-down shirt, and a light jacket—the only jacket Brand owned since nobody had taken the time to go to my place for a coat and my other coat was gone.

  So yeah, I was cold.

  I hate snow. Why live in Colorado? I ask myself that question every damn winter. That said, normally the snow is gone in a few days and the weather warms up. We do get a lot of sunny days. I appreciate that, but when it’s cold, I think about hopping on a plane to Key West. Sun and beaches were on my mind then, but the wind whipped blowing snow into my face and shattered the image.

  Brand pulled up a few minutes later. He drove Kelly’s SUV. Brand drives a beat-up pickup truck, and from what Kelly told me, smashing up the skeletons didn’t improve its looks much.

  “That’s my jacket,” Brand said as I climbed into the backseat. He wore a short-sleeved T-shirt.

  “You can have it back when I get a new coat.”

  “Maybe we should stop at a store on the way home. I don’t want you wearing my jacket. It’s too big for you anyway.”

  “Leave it alone, Brand,” Kelly said as she closed the door.

  Esther popped into the backseat beside me. She didn’t speak but she kept an eye on me.

  “How did he get my jacket?”

  “I brought it to him,” Kelly said.

  In the rearview mirror, I saw him make a face, but he bit his tongue. “Whatever.”

  She turned toward him. I couldn’t see her face, but from her tone of voice, I knew she was glaring at him. “You have a problem with that, Brand?”

  He kept his eyes on the road. “Not really.”

  “You’d better not.”

  “He can keep the damn jacket if he likes it so much.”

  “It smells funky,” I said.

  Brand and Kelly ignored me but Esther smiled.

  I watched Brand in the rearview. Every now and then, he’d catch my eye in the mirror, but he instantly looked back to the road. I knew he was thinking he should be more careful because he wasn’t on solid ground with Kelly.

  My cell phone rang, and the caller ID told me it was Miranda.

  “Shade Investigations, no case too small, no fee too large.”

  “Jonathan, this is Miranda. I didn’t hear from you last night. Did you learn anything?”

  “I learned that hospital food doesn’t agree with my stomach.”

  “Hospital? Are you all right?”

  “Yeah, I’m OK. I have a lead on your heart. Is everything cool at your place?”

  “No dead people if that’s what you mean.”

  “Good. Want to meet me at Zach’s house tomorrow morning at five?”

  “That early? It’s easier for me to stay up late than get up early. What about tonight?”

  “Let’s go with tomorrow. You don’t have to be there. It’s all good. I can check it out alone.”

  “No, I want to go. Are you sure you’re OK? Your voice sounds a little…strained.”

  “I’m fine. Really. See you tomorrow.” I ended the call.

  Kelly turned in her seat. “I’m going with you tomorrow.”

  “Me too,” Brand and Esther said at the same time.

  “The gang’s all in. Should be a party.”

  Brand pulled into my apartment complex parking lot. Kelly and I got out.

  “I’m staying here tonight,” she said.

  “I’ll park and crash here too,” Brand said.

  “No,” Kelly said. “You go to my place. Be back here at four-thirty.”

  “Is this about that stupid jacket? I’m sorry I mentioned it.”

  “It’s not about the jacket. Go home.”

  He started to say something but then shook his head and closed his mouth.

  Esther watched them for a moment, glanced at me, shrugged, then popped away.

  Kelly and I started toward the apartment. Esther popped back to us.

  “All clear,” she said.

  I had a few pieces of her old typewriter in the apartment so she could go there anytime. I took special care in their locations so none of the pieces were within fifteen feet of the restroom. Privacy is a good thing. When we entered the apartment, Kelly checked the restroom first then gave me a nod.

  We sat on the couch.

  “Are you hurting?” she asked. “Need some Advil or anything?”

  “I’m good.”

  Kelly gave Esther a look.

  “I think I’ll pop over to Kelly’s place to make sure Brand doesn’t get too ossified.”

  Kelly gave her a nod, and Esther popped away.

  I looked at Kelly. “What?”

  She stood there for a moment, just staring at me. She shook her head and went right to the point as she loved to do.

  “What the hell is wrong with you, Jonathan?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You haven’t been yourself since Naomi died.”

  “I don’t have a right to grieve?”

  “Don’t play that card with me.”

  “I know it’s hard for you to believe, but I loved her.”

  “That part I understand, but this is more than that.”

  “How do you figure?”

  “None of us trusted her. Including you.”

  “So?”

  “You weren’t this bad after she dumped you five years ago.”

  “She’s dead now. That’s different. I should have been able to save her.”

  “You need to save yourself right now.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean you’ve been reckless. From what Walter told me, you fought those skeletons when you could have broken through and raced for an exit.”

  “It didn’t occur to me.”

  “Bullshit. O’Malley called me wanting to know if you were OK. He said you walked right up to a dead guy who’d just killed his wife. A guy who was armed with a knife.”

  “So?”

  “Are you trying to get yourself killed?”

  “I lead a dangerous life.”

  “You’re being stupid. I keep hearing about things you’re doing and saying. People are worried about you, Jonathan.”

  “They don’t need to worry. I’m fine.”

  “You didn’t call me when you got away from the skeletons. Walter said you sat down by a Dumpster and if he hadn’t come by, you’d have bled out or frozen to death.”

  “I’d lost a lot of blood. I was disoriented.”

  Kelly rose and grabbed me by Brand’s jacket. She pulled me to my feet and stared into my eyes. “Do you want to die?”

/>   I didn’t answer.

  She held my gaze, and when she spoke, her words were like whispered bullets. She spoke them slowly, carefully enunciating each word as if every single one were its own sentence and carried the weight of the universe. “Be. Honest. Do. You. Want. To. Die?”

  I tried to pull away from her, but she’s far stronger than I am.

  “Answer me.”

  I closed my eyes and breathed out slowly. “I don’t care anymore.”

  “You don’t care if you live or die?”

  “Not especially.”

  Kelly shook her head. “You need to explain that to me.”

  “What’s the point?”

  “So I can understand. So I can help you.”

  “No, Kelly. What’s the fucking point? What purpose do I serve? Why should I bother living this life? What good does it do?”

  “You help people. You showed me that I can help people too. That alone should make life worth living. You have people who love you.”

  “Right.”

  Kelly shoved me against the wall and released the jacket. “I love you. Esther adores you. You have friends who care about you.”

  “Come on. You’re like a sister to me. Esther has been dead for decades. Most of my friends have gotten married and are raising kids. I have no one. I feel…empty.”

  “Get over yourself, Jonathan. Everybody feels empty. We all find ways to fill our lives with as many good things as we can find. You’re trying to throw yours away.”

  “No, I’m not. I’m still here.”

  “Going through the motions, sure. Miranda is attractive.”

  I shook my head. “You don’t get it. Miranda isn’t even alive.”

  “That makes two of you, then.”

  “No. The necromancer who took her heart? That Zach guy? He’s dead. He’s buried in his own backyard. That means his magic is gone. That means her heart is not beating. She’s dead, Kelly. D-E-A-D, dead. Kaput. Pushing up daisies. She is an ex-person. She doesn’t know it because whatever Persephone did to make people rise up to try to find Sharon also made her rise up.”

  “Didn’t you trick the assholes at DGI into destroying all the dead bodies?”

  “Yeah.”

  “So why is she still up and about?”

  I blinked. “I don’t know. Maybe Von intentionally spared her because she was with me. Otherwise, she’d have been liquefied.”