Mothers and Daughters

by Howard, Minna

  Alice was silent now beside him in the car, her face turned away as she gazed out of the window. He wished he could get close to her, get back to the easy feeling they’d had between them before she’d asked him about Ned.

  He’d slept badly ever since, worried about her, tortured if he were honest, by her blaming him for Julian’s secrecy. It had to be sorted now, before things festered further, and he’d gone round this morning determined to have it out with her. He understood how upset she was, wondering why Julian hadn’t told her about Ned and if there was more to it than the simple truth.

  The first time he’d met Alice with Julian he’d been drawn to her but it was obvious that she was madly in love with Julian. Ned happily secure with his mother and stepfather in the US didn’t feature. He couldn’t remember now if he’d ever asked Julian if he’d told Alice about him, probably not as he assumed it was Julian’s business to do so. Alice never mentioned him and in those early days there were so many other things they talked about. Then after their wedding he’d gone to live in France and he hadn’t seen much of Alice and Julian together.

  He’d heard of Julian’s death through a friend, though he’d known he was ill and had seen him a few months before. Perhaps he meant to tell Alice about it when he became ill but died before he could, but now he would never know.

  But his early morning mission to go round to her and make his peace, and hopefully spend the day with her, had been scuppered by Margot’s problems, which had obviously taken over, and he must now go to the company and see what was happening, so he couldn’t stay with Alice today anyway. To his relief she seemed to have forgotten her anger with him, or perhaps Margot’s problems had overshadowed it.

  She broke her silence. ‘It’s so scary. Do you think Glen was up to something he shouldn’t be? I mean, that house cost so much more than the one they sold in Fulham and the presents he gives her, Julian often talked about it, wondered how much money he was earning and he thought the so-called shares were quite dubious.’

  He hated to see how worried she was; there was nothing she, any of them, could do, except stand by Margot. She could count on Alice. She wasn’t the sort of person to dump her friends if they were in trouble and he so hoped she wouldn’t distance herself from him because he’d told her about Julian and Ned. He’d kept away from her all these years because he loved her and she was Julian’s wife, but now he wanted to stay and hope that she might grow to love him...

  Shaking himself from his thoughts, he said, ‘I don’t know, but I’ll find out. I’m afraid I’ve seen quite a lot of this sort of thing; it’s the bulk of my work after all, reporting on various frauds and mistakes. Perfectly decent people can get sucked into things and then keep quiet as they are afraid to lose their job, lose the money they are spending on their children’s education, good holidays, a better house and all the rest of it.’

  ‘So he could be guilty of something?’ Alice asked her face strained. ‘And Margot, do you think she knew?’

  ‘Let’s wait and see what happens, not speculate until we know.’ He smiled at her. He knew all about wives accepting expensive gifts and believing whatever story their husbands chose to tell them as to how they suddenly had money to burn. It worked both ways: he’d come across a few women who’d defrauded their company and convinced the men in their lives it was legal too.

  Margot was an intelligent woman, and Alice had told him that she was apt to be cagey about discussing her husband, so did she suspect he was up to something? Or feel, as so many people did, that by pretending nothing was wrong it somehow wouldn’t be? Or was she like most wives and mothers often juggling work and home and being too busy, or just too tired at the end of the day, to confront it and demand to know what was going on? Had Alice wondered about Julian, wondered why he, Frank, never came to their house? Or was she too occupied with their busy life to care?

  He went on, ‘There are troubles in that company, but I won’t tell you about it, as they might not be true, but I’m sorry but I must go there at once. I wanted to talk to you about Julian and Ned, but I’ll have to leave that until this is over. I’m so sorry, Alice.’ He turned to her, wishing he could hold her but he couldn’t anyway without causing a terrible crash on the Gloucester Road.

  ‘It’s all right,’ she said. She turned to him, her face anxious. ‘It’s frightening that you can live so intimately with someone for many years and they can keep such things hidden – Julian with Ned and now Glen and Margot. I’ve known Margot since we were six and she’s one of the most honest people I know. She never had much money until she got a job at Colefax and Fowler, and yet she never grumbled or tried to get hold of money she hadn’t worked for. She married Glen and he had a good job and things got better for them as he climbed up the greasy pole of success in the City. Then she and I started our decorating business and made quite good money at the beginning, hardly enough to live on, but enough, and now it seems to be taking off again. But I’m worried now the tax wasn’t paid on it, we left it to Glen’s accountant.’

  ‘You must have some correspondence to prove it was paid.’ He was worried for her now. Who was this accountant, was he responsible for any tax dodges Glen was involved in?

  ‘We do. We went through the papers the other day. It all looked all right, and we’re hardly talking mammoth sums of money here.’

  ‘Have you got them at home, I could check them for you?’ He couldn’t do it now but perhaps he could come back this evening, take her out to dinner.

  ‘No, they are with Margot. Oh God, I suppose the police will have taken them won’t they in their black sacks?’ Her voice was anguished. ‘If they were wrong, we’ll be in this too. Will we be arrested?’

  He pulled over and turned to her, taking her hands in his. ‘Alice, I don’t know what, if anything, Glen was up to. But if you paid the tax on your business and had confirmation back, you’ll be in the clear. All the papers will be scrutinized, and it will take ages.’

  ‘But we’ve just started a new line which is going quite well, will we have to stop it?’

  ‘I don’t think so, but it may be better to keep all the papers to do with it at your house. When Margot’s calmed down a little ask her if any of them are still around. Do you have all your contacts so you can keep trading?’ It was so hard seeing her like this. She’d had so much to bear, Julian’s illness and death, her daughters’ drastic actions, then finding out about Ned and now this.

  ‘By luck I took our contact book home and it has the dates of our recent orders so we can finish those.’

  ‘Good, but fortunately your business is small fry compared to this huge financial firm. Does Glen finance your business at all?’

  ‘No, we were determined to do this on our own and not ask either of our husbands for money.’ She smiled, ‘It is entirely ours, so neither husband could boss us about.’

  He laughed, ‘Good thinking. Was Julian very bossy then?’

  ‘No, he wasn’t, not often anyway, but we wanted to use our own ideas and not have too much input from outside. We did our tax returns but gave them to Glen’s accountant to file, so…’ she shrugged. ‘I just hope he did them correctly.’

  He wanted to kiss her, hold her; she was so brave fighting on without Julian beside her. He wished he could help her but she was too proud to let him, too annoyed with him for keeping such secrets and no doubt felt he was ganging up on her, him and Julian together.

  He could not tell her that he’d always loved her and that he felt it prudent to move away from her. As time went on he buried his love for her deep in his memory and met and married Simone, and they’d been happy enough, though their marriage had failed, and they got on better now they lived apart. He’d made a good life for himself and had two wonderful children.

  ‘Let me out here, please Frank, I want to go on to Peter Jones and get some ribbons for our baskets, if we still have a business,’ Alice said, seeing the lights were about to change. ‘I’ll leave you to go on to work. Thank you for coming
with me to Margot’s. I’ll ring her later, see if she wants to come and stay with me for a while.’ She got out of the car before he could stop her, then leant back in. ‘I know I mustn’t ask you what’s going on, but if you find anything out about Glen, please tell me.’

  ‘I’ll have to see about that, but if there’s anything, it’s bound to come out. Take care. Let’s meet soon.’ He blew her a kiss and she blew one back, quickly as if it were a reflex action.

  ‘I know you’ll be busy with this for some time, just turn up at the wedding, that’s all you need to do.’ With a smile she was gone and he watched her through the driving mirror, her slim hips swinging elegantly as she moved away from him and out of sight.

  40

  Glen was released on bail, and Frank, when Alice, egged on by Margot, telephoned him that evening to ask what was going on, said vaguely that various complicated scams had been discovered in the bank and he couldn’t say anything about them just now.

  ‘They’ll take ages to get to court and these things are often hard to prove so they’ll probably get away with them,’ Frank said, ‘but don’t say that to Margot. It could be all over the press tomorrow though, so warn her. I’m sorry, Alice, there’s nothing I can do to stop things coming out, other journalists have got hold of the story now.’

  ‘Thanks Frank, I’ll tell her.’ She was dying to hear more, though she guessed by his tone of voice things were more serious than he was letting on. She assumed he wasn’t allowed to say or encourage any rumour before he wrote his article.

  ‘I’m afraid I’ll be working flat out for the next few weeks,’ he said, ‘and I so wanted to talk to you about Julian, I can’t bear for you to think badly of him, he loved you more than anyone, please hold on to that.’

  ‘I will,’ she said, though she felt empty inside, as if some familiar part of her had been destroyed.

  ‘I’ll be in touch when I can and certainly be there for the wedding and… do ring me if there is anything you need, Alice.’ There was a slight edge to his voice now, which she interpreted as him having other more pressing things to do.

  The case was not widely reported in the press and was only in the financial pages, which was a relief for those concerned. Margot chose to believe that Glen was innocent and most of their friends went along with that, though he and the other directors were suspended from work, and he and Margot escaped down to Cornwall to recover, or possibly hide, from the ordeal.

  ‘I’ll be back for the wedding,’ she promised Alice. ‘I just want to leave London, can’t stand all the suspicious looks people we know give us, though they say to our face that they’re sure Glen is innocent. Our best friends like you are fine but some of the others are envious about the money Glen earned and can’t believe he didn’t do something dishonest to get it.’

  Alice understood that Margot wanted to escape, though she wished she were still here as their nursery basket business seemed to have suddenly taken off, so it was now left to her to choose the fabrics and take everything down to Suffolk, not that she really minded as she could see Raffi, and Laura needed one last fitting of her dress. But there was so much else to do with the wedding that needed her attention, find her own outfit for a start, and because she enjoyed baking, Laura asked if she’d mind making her wedding cake.

  ‘They cost a fortune if you have one made and it won’t taste nearly as good as yours anyway. You make one every Christmas and it’s the same sort of cake, so you could do a wedding cake instead, couldn’t you, Mum? We only want a simple one, not masses of tiers and pillars and everything, please Mum?’ Laura begged the last time she’d seen her. She had of course agreed, though there was not nearly enough time for the mixture to marinate properly.

  She’d soaked the fruit in brandy for three days and then baked it and it stood on top of the microwave being fed from time to time when she remembered. She realized she should have made a Christmas cake at the same time, after all Christmas was just after the wedding. Who would be with her, or would she be alone?

  News must have got round that she was coming to Suffolk because just before she left London she had a call from Freya asking if she’d mind coming over for a drink; Nick was away and she wanted to talk about the wedding.

  ‘OK, see you about seven, then,’ Alice said, anxiety clutching at her. It was so annoying, tactless even, of Laura inviting them, well Nick anyway. She could imagine him schmoozing round, chatting up any pretty women and perhaps even boasting about his sexual prowess by showing off Raffi, adding to the embarrassment of having to explain about Evie’s new role as a single mother. With any luck, Freya, wanting to see her on her own, was going to refuse the invitation.

  She told Evie she was going to meet up with Freya, Evie just shrugged and asked if she’d mind keeping an eye on Raffi while she worked. Raffi was beautiful, round and plump and very smiley. She sat with him on the sofa as Evie scuttled back to her drawing, planning out a new set of illustrations for the next book. Watching him looking round chortling to himself, Alice felt bathed with a feeling of completeness of the continuity of life, though for the scene to be perfect, Julian, the man she thought he was, should be here too, basking in the joy of their grandchild. Raffi chuckled waving his fists at her; it was a bittersweet moment.

  Sitting with him on her lap while Evie worked, she thought of her youngest daughter. She seemed different; she’d noticed it the moment she’d arrived about an hour ago. She was blooming and she hadn’t once mentioned Nick. She’d been so pleased to see her too, not in a relieved way as if now she was here she could take over the baby, cook a decent meal, tidy the place up a bit, but just pleased to see her as if she wanted to share her happiness with her. Could it be motherhood giving her a sort of peace, someone to love of her own, or more likely someone else to love? Unless… and the thought worried her, Nick had decided to leave Freya and come to Evie. Was that why Evie seemed so upbeat? Why Freya wanted to talk to her?

  The thought now became a reality and she almost jumped up to go and confront Evie, tell her in no uncertain terms that having a child with a married man was bad enough but him leaving his wife and family for her was much worse. But what if Freya had chucked him out and he’d come here? If that were the case, how long would he stay, until he took up with the next woman? She glanced round the room as if expecting to see some evidence of him, a discarded jacket, the battered once expensive brief case he carried with the papers concerned with his work, but untidy though the room was, there seemed to be only Evie’s shoes flung in a corner, her coat over the back of a chair and Raffi’s things strewn around.

  She heard Evie coming out of the study and she came into the room interrupting her panic.

  ‘It’s so dreadful about Glen,’ Evie said, scooping Raffi from her arms and sitting down on the floor, putting him between her legs, propping him against her now flat stomach. ‘Don’t you remember how Dad always wondered how they’d managed to buy that house. Buying a derelict house and doing it up and selling it on for a profit is one thing, but they didn’t sell it did they, they kept it and lived in it.’

  Alice thought the same thing and they’d filled the house with expensive things, but she didn’t want to say too much in front of her children who might inadvertently pass it on to Margot and ruin their friendship. ‘I don’t know exactly what happened. Glen had shares and things and the value of the Fulham house had gone up,’ she said vaguely, her mind more concentrated on Nick and his whereabouts than Glen’s troubles. How could she broach the subject of the state of play with him without antagonizing her? ‘Have you got something nice to wear for the wedding?’ she asked to gain time.

  ‘I’ll find something, I’ll come to London a few days before and… Mum…’ Evie didn’t look at her but kept her eyes on Raffi. ‘Would it be all right if I asked someone, just one person, to the wedding?’

  Alice looked at her sharply. Here it was… but Nick had been asked to the wedding already, with his wife and Lexie who was to be one of the bridesmaids. But it
was obvious from Evie’s manner that this was not some random friend. Evie was rather self-consciously playing with Raffi, tickling his fat little feet.

  ‘We’re pretty much full up,’ Alice said. ‘Is it someone we know?’

  Evie looked at her, her face defiant, the face she always put on when she had done something, or was about to do something, she suspected her parents would disapprove of. ‘It’s just someone I’ve met, and we’ve got quite close.’ She threw it out as if it was not important, though it was obvious from the light in her eyes that it was very important indeed.

  Alice’s heart lurched; it wasn’t Nick. But if not him then who? Oh not another married man drawn in by Evie’s beauty and vulnerability? She couldn’t bear it. ‘His name?’ she asked weakly, it was bound to be a man.

  ‘Luke, he’s a sculptor. We met in the pub, he’s…’ she didn’t look at her mother, ‘we’ve become quite close,’ she repeated.

  ‘Is he single and does he know about Raffi?’ Alice asked. She was definitely going to take a gap year, escape from her family… and Frank and all the problems they kept throwing at her, expecting her to accept them without question and share the responsibility of them.

  Evie scowled, ‘Yes to both, he loves Raffi, wants to sculpt him, says his rounded squidgy limbs are perfect for something he’s working on.’

  Was that the only reason this Luke was close to her? When he’d finished his work, would he leave her or was this a more hopeful chapter in Evie’s love life? ‘So is that the end of Nick?’ she asked.

  ‘He doesn’t want to know, does he?’ Evie burst out as if she was somehow at fault for finding someone else. ‘He hasn’t been near us since Raffi was born, he pays money for him but that’s all. I suppose Freya won’t let him out of the house.’