Baby Shock

by Alexis Winter

  It takes me about an hour to reach the cabin, but I quickly unpack the truck and get to work. Keeping busy has always been the way I choose to keep my mind off things—even back when my mom was a drunk and I was the one raising my sister. I take out a bottle of bourbon and sit at the small table in the kitchen. I roll out the floor plans and start to work on the expansion. I draw a layout, adding in a staircase and three bedrooms upstairs along with a bathroom. Downstairs, I add in a dining room, expand the kitchen and bathroom, and add a porch that wraps around the entire cabin. It will probably take most of my life to build it, but at least I’ll have the plans done and ready. One thing at a time, I tell myself.

  I drink and I plan. I don’t even realize how late it’s gotten, but once I can no longer see the paper in front of me, I look at my watch to see it’s nearing five p.m. I light the lantern on the table and the room fills with a soft glow. I fold up the paper and cap the bottle before taking the lantern to the small bathroom for a shower, deciding that I should just crash here tonight given how much I’ve had to drink.

  I turn on the water and strip out of my clothes. Stepping beneath the hot flow of water feels amazing. It immediately relaxes me and eases the soreness in my neck and back from sitting in the hard kitchen chair for so long. When I close my eyes and dip my head beneath the water, a vision forms behind my eyes. I can only see tan skin and red lips. Quiet gasps fill my ears. Nails dig into my back as I thrust into her, filling her completely. She was made for me. Her body fits mine like a glove.

  My hand wraps around my length and slowly begins pumping. It only fuels my naughtiest fantasies. My breathing picks up, my heart pounds, and my muscles grow hard as my pace quickens.

  “Ethan, please. I need you. Right there.” She moans. “Don’t stop!”

  Before I know what’s happening, I’m spilling every last drop onto the shower floor. As my body calms down, my guilt picks up, eating me alive. How could I do that while thinking of her? I’m fucking disgusted with myself.

  Anger surges through my body as I step out and wrap a towel around my waist. I look at my reflection in the mirror, and something is off. I no longer look like the man I’m used to seeing. I look like a wild man who’s had his first hit of his newest addiction. My eyes are wide with fear, but excitement is also shining through.

  It was just a stupid fantasy, I tell myself. I can’t do anything about it in real life, so it was only a matter of time before it came out any way it could. I shouldn’t be mad at myself for this. I would be mad at myself if this didn’t happen and things between us grew to become that for real. Maybe this is what it will take to keep myself where I need to be: far away from her. At least my body feels like it’s getting what it wants—that’s the important part, right?

  I shake the thoughts from my head and exit the bathroom, falling onto the bed where I drift off to a deep sleep without any thoughts or dreams of her.

  My phone goes off in the morning, and I quickly stand and pull on my clothes. Instead of packing up everything, I lock the door and make my way back into town. I quickly swing by my apartment, shower, and dress in clean clothes for the day before making a single cup of coffee to take to my mom. She’s been doing really well at keeping herself in check, but I like to keep an eye on her. I knock on the door and she answers it fully dressed and ready for work.

  She smiles and takes the cup I’m holding out. “I was wondering if you’d be stopping by this morning.” She turns and leaves the door open for me to walk in.

  “Why wouldn’t I? I’m here every morning.” I lean against the counter as she moves about, getting her things ready to go to work at Amy’s coffee shop.

  “Well, word has it you started working at the tractor supply store.” She glances at me from over her shoulder.

  I nod once. “I did. How’d you hear about that?”

  “You know my old friend Dean, don’t you?”

  I snort. “Yeah, Dean, the guy who spends all day, every day, at the bar getting drunk. The one who used to babysit us.”

  She laughs. “That’s the one. Anyway, I ran into him last night and he had just left the bar where…what’s Ves’ sisters name? Aria?”

  I squint and nod.

  “Well, Aria was there and she was telling her friends about how you’d just been hired on and were to start this morning.”

  I laugh and shake my head. “Okay. Small towns, huh? Yes, I was hired there part time. It’s just something to make up for the loss of income from being knocked down at the station.”

  “Well, I’m glad you got a job you needed, but I think you need to be careful.”

  I stand up straight. “With what?”

  “With that little girl who works there, Ves’ sister.”

  I laugh. “Mom, she’s, like, twenty-one. Nothing is going on there.”

  She points her finger at me. “You just keep it that way. She’s too young for you, and word has it, she’s a little fast. You don’t need to get caught up with someone like that.”

  I shake my head, amazed that she feels the need to tell me this. “Mom, Aria is Ves’ kid sister. Nothing will happen. Not only is she too young for me, but I think our families are entwined enough, don’t you?”

  She presses her lips together and looks me up and down. “Mm-hmm, just wanted to point that out, Ethan. Come on.” She sets down her coffee cup and grabs her purse. “Walk me to my car.”

  I open the door and motion for her to go out first. I lock the door behind me then follow her to the elevator.

  “I know how you are, Ethan.”

  “What does that mean, Mom?”

  “It means I know you’ve always had a thing for wanting what you can’t have. This little girl…”

  “Mom,” I say sternly, “enough.”

  “Okay,” she mumbles, stepping into the elevator. “She’s trouble, Ethan. That’s all I’m saying.”

  “Fine,” I breathe out, tired of this conversation already. I don’t even argue with her any longer because she’s right. I’ve always wanted everything I can’t have. And Aria is no different. She’s young and sexy, and she wants me. I could read it on her face. Just thinking about how easy it’d be makes my heart pound. But I push the thoughts away, refusing to give in.

  I walk Mom to her car, then jump in my truck to head to the store. Pulling up, the parking lot is empty and the sign on the door still says CLOSED. I park and shut off the truck, knowing I can’t get inside. I check the time on the dash. It’s going on ten, the time the sign says it opens.

  Out of nowhere, a little red two-door car whips into the parking lot so fast dust swarms my truck. It quickly parks up front, and Aria climbs out, rushing inside. I laugh and shake my head, guessing she’s running late.

  I climb out of the truck and walk in. The bell rings and she looks at me wide-eyed as she counts the money.

  “Dad’s not here yet. Please don’t tell him I’m late,” she pleads, eyes wide with fear.

  I press my lips together and head to the corner to start up the coffee pot so it looks like she’s been here long enough to get her morning routine done.

  “Thank you,” she breathes out.

  I nod once, but don’t talk to her—sticking to my plan.

  Seconds after the coffee has been started, her dad’s truck pulls into the parking lot. I walk out the door, unable to stand in the same room with her without looking at her or talking to her.

  “Good morning, sir,” I say as he steps out.

  “Good morning, Ethan.” Gary steps out. “My daughter here?”

  “Yes, sir.” I nod.

  “Was she late?”

  “Not to my knowledge, sir,” I lie with a shake of my head.

  “Let’s get inside and I’ll walk you through what you’ll be doing here every day. Sound good?” He leads me in the direction of the building.

  “Good morning, Daddy,” Aria says when we walk inside.

  Her words make my dick twitch. I don’t know why, but I’d love to hear her say t
hose words to me, though perhaps a little more breathy, maybe even in a moan.

  I shake my head free of the thought.

  “Good morning, sweetheart,” he replies, leading me toward his office.

  Inside, he sets his things down and turns to face me. “Now, basically, I’m needing a salesman for the showroom floor. I’m getting older and I’d like to have more free time instead of being here working every day. And while Aria can sell the shit out of some tractors, she can’t answer all the questions potential buyers could ask. So I’ll need you to study this brochure.” He hands me a thick booklet. “Now, while you’ll be spending most of your time out on the sales floor with Aria, there will be times when I’ll need your help with deliveries. We sell more than just tractors here. We have apparel, hats, and farm tools. All that stuff comes in on Fridays, so I’ll need you here every Friday morning. I hope that’s all right?”

  I nod. “Should be fine. I’m strictly nights at the station right now.”

  “Good.” He steps out into the hallway and leads me further into the building. “We also do certified repairs here. This is the garage,” he says, opening the door to the biggest garage I’ve ever seen.

  Chapter Three

  Aria

  I’m in the restroom, looking myself over in the full-length mirror. I study my tight jean skirt, wedge sandals, and green tractor t-shirt I’ve tied up into a knot just above my belly button. I’ve also put a cut in the neckline, allowing some cleavage to show. I bend down to fix my ankle bracelet when the door opens.

  “Oh, shit,” Ethan says, quickly stepping back to check the sign on the door. The sign reads EMPLOYEE RESTROOM, not MEN or WOMEN.

  “It’s cool, Ethan. I’m done.” I adjust my shirt and smile, knowing he got a straight shot at my ass while I was bent over. His body is hard and rigid as I squeeze past him in the open doorway. My chest presses against his, and I look up at him as he looks down at me—straight down my shirt.

  “You know, we could do something like this at my place later.” I smile, knowing he’s not going to go for it, but also wanting to put it out there at the same time.

  “I—uh, I don’t think that’s a good idea, Aria.” He finally takes control of his body and steps into the restroom. “If you’ll excuse me.”

  I look him up and down one last time before stepping out and leaving him alone. Standing on the other side of the door, I hear his heavy breathing as he locks it between us. I can’t help but smile as I walk away, happy that I got to him.

  After work, instead of going home, I stop at the bar and order a Long Island iced tea. I suck down half of it the minute it’s placed in front of me, but decide to slow down and enjoy the rest now that I have a quick buzz going.

  “Hey, Aria,” Justin says, sitting next to me.

  I roll my eyes, but turn to face him with a smile. “Hey, what’s up?”

  Justin and I have had a thing going since high school. We would party together then hook up, but nothing past that.

  “Just broke up with Chelsea,” he replies, running his hand through his thick blond hair.

  I press my lips together and turn them downward. “Darn it,” I fake sympathy.

  He laughs and bumps his shoulder against mine. “Yeah, yeah, we’re all sad about it. But hey, that means we could…you know.” He grins while nodding his head up and down.

  I haven’t been laid since I graduated college a few months ago. A random hookup sounds like something I need, but someone catches my eye. Ethan. He walks in and sits at the end of the bar. I watch as he orders a beer and trains his eyes on the TV in the corner.

  “How about we catch up first?” I look up at Justin.

  “Sounds good to me. Want to dance?”

  “Sure.” I stand and slip my hand into his, and he leads me out onto the dance floor. He walks us to the center and pulls me against his chest. His green eyes meet mine, and he wets his lips.

  “You’re still as beautiful as you’ve always been.”

  I giggle shyly. “Thank you.” My eyes keep flashing over to Ethan’s back.

  “Why haven’t we ever been anything other than fuck buddies?”

  I roll my eyes. “I’m not that kind of girl, Justin. You know that.”

  “Yeah, and I’m not that kind of guy, but that doesn’t keep me from running back to you. Come on, Aria. You’ve had to have thought about it at some point. I mean, we’d make a great couple. You already know how amazing we are.” He flashes me a flirtatious smirk.

  “Well, if you want to take me home so badly, then shut up and convince me.”

  His mouth smashes against mine, and I can’t stop myself from pretending it’s Ethan kissing me. His tongue slides into my mouth and twists with my own. A shiver runs up my spine as my fingers thread into his hair, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. When he pulls away, I nip his bottom lip gently.

  “Damn,” he breathes out. “You’ve never kissed me like that before.”

  I shrug one shoulder. “I guess I’ve grown up a little since the last time we did this.”

  “Yes, you have,” he whispers.

  My face heats up, but I step back. “I’m going to grab us another drink. Why don’t you find us a quiet table over in the corner so we can catch up?” I spin and walk away, shaking my ass a little more than necessary.

  I step up to the bar and place my order, pretending I don’t notice Ethan sitting right next to me. I look to my right, then to my left, where our eyes lock.

  “Oh, hey,” I mumble, faking surprise.

  “Aria.”

  “What are you doing here?”

  He shrugs, but doesn’t tear his eyes away from the TV. “Just wanted to relax for a bit.”

  I’m handed two drinks and his eyes move down to look at them. “You here with someone?”

  “No. I just ran into someone.”

  “It wouldn’t be that someone who’s over there drooling right now, would it?” So he did notice me.

  I laugh. “Well, you declined my offer this afternoon. He didn’t,” I reply.

  He turns and looks at Justin sitting in the corner, eyes on us. “You can do better.”

  I turn to face him. My chest presses against his arm and he tenses.

  “Changing your mind?”

  “About what?” His attention is right back on the TV. It’s almost like he’s refusing to give in and look at me.

  “About my offer. I’m usually not this forward, Ethan, but I think we could be pretty amazing.”

  “You’re my little sister’s best friend’s kid sister. Does that not scream ‘wrong’ to you?” His jaw is flexing when his eyes finally lock on mine, and they’re clouded and squinting with anger.

  “Sometimes being bad feels pretty good, Ethan,” I whisper before turning and walking away.

  I quickly glance over my shoulder at him, and find him watching me, eyes filled with something he’ll never show me. But I can wait. It’s all a matter of time. He’s avoiding me now, but soon, he’ll go out of his way to find me, to talk to me, to touch me. And my heart beats with excitement just waiting for that day.

  Justin and I sit back and have several drinks while talking about what we’ve each been up to over the past couple years. We dance and laugh—genuinely having a good time—but I can’t stop thinking about Ethan. And my eyes seem to have a mind of their own. Even though I’m having a good time with Justin, they won’t leave Ethan for very long.

  Ethan seems comfortable sitting alone, drinking his beer, and watching TV. He never glances around or talks to anyone. He’s a loner and seems okay with that. I’d never be able to do that. Anytime I go anywhere alone, I always feel like people are watching me or judging me. He’s comfortable in his own skin—so unlike me. I’m always concerned about what people may be thinking about me. Can Ethan see that in me? Does he know how insecure I really am? Is that a turn-off for him?

  Ugh, I feel like I’m going crazy. Why doesn’t he like me?

  When he stands and heads down
the hallway for the restroom, I jump up abruptly, causing Justin to look at me with confusion.

  “I’m going to use the ladies’ room,” I mumble, not bothering to tear my eyes away from the hallway Ethan just walked down.

  Once at the end, I lean against the wall and wait for him to come out. My vision is blurry and my skin feels hot and sticky. It’s now very obvious that I’ve had way too much to drink and I’m probably about to make an ass out of myself. The second I decide to save myself the humiliation, the door opens and he steps out, stopping suddenly when he finds me.

  “Aria?” he asks, confused as to why I’m standing here.

  Two seconds ago, I had decided not to do this, but now that I’m looking at him, the words slip out. “Why don’t you like me, Ethan?” I ask, unable to control myself as I stand up straight in front of him.

  “What?”

  “Why don’t you like me? I’ve never had to hit on a man this many times to get him to notice me. What’s the deal? Am I too ugly or something?” I feel my eyes tear up, but I’m not sure if it’s my insecurities bleeding out, or just the embarrassment I’m sure to feel for this later.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you?” he asks, anger drenching his words, and it shocks me. I was expecting sympathy, not hostility.

  “You’re nothing but a spoiled little girl who’s way too used to getting anything and everything you want. You’re so used to people groveling at your feet for time and attention, and it’s driving you crazy that I’m not doing that, isn’t it?” His brows are pinched together and his jaw is flexed in anger.