Welcome to Hell Box Set: Paranormal Romantic Comedy

by Demelza Carlton

  He laughed. "I like that I can just buy flowers and chocolates and things, it's so much easier. Have you tried to get a restaurant booking?"

  Now both of them were laughing. "Valentine's Day and Chinese New Year in the same week? I'd never get a table! We'll be having dinner at home tonight. I hate going out for dinner on Valentine's Day, it's always so crowded, expensive and romantic. " He made romantic sound like the worst adjective of the three. Mel ducked her head to hide her smile.

  "Yeah, mate, me too. Who wants to go out to dinner on Valentine's Day?"

  Mel thought that she'd enjoy it, to be among so many happy couples, celebrating their love together. The atmosphere could be absolutely blissful. Still, she'd never be able to enjoy her meal, knowing that her table could have been occupied by another couple instead of her self-indulgent self, so tonight she planned to stay home, too. But first, they all had a full day's work to do before that could happen.

  The train stopped and Mel turned, recognising the shirts the men wore, marking the men as employees of a consulting firm in the building across the road from the HELL Corporation. She couldn't recall what the company did – its logo featured the same mysterious combination of three letters that most such companies had. The crowd of commuters leaving the train soon separated her from the two anti-valentines and she exhaled her relief.

  It was hot already, so she kept to the shaded walkways for her stroll to the office. Beneath the glass ceiling on the plaza, someone had hung red lanterns to celebrate the start of the Year of the Snake. Below the lanterns, a florist had placed a huge display of red roses. "Only $99, a dozen roses delivered to YOUR Valentine!" said the sign painted on the window.

  Mel walked past the florist. Something smelled beautiful and it sure wasn't the phalanx of red flowers. She entered the shop and the scent mystery was solved. She waited patiently for service from the angry florist and her stressed assistant.

  "Why did you order so many Asiatics? No one wants Asiatics for Valentine's Day – everyone wants red roses! Now we won't have space in the fridge for what we really need!" The florist's face was growing as red as the flowers she was shoving into the refrigerator. "And chocolates – how could you order gold hearts when everyone wants red? We'll never sell these and they'll melt out of the fridge in this heat!"

  The assistant looked about fifteen and ready to cry. "I didn't…you told me…" She proffered an order pad, pointing at handwriting that looked too old to be hers. "What do I do with the liliums?"

  "Put them out on sale! If we can't sell them at four o'clock to the desperate men who forgot to order roses, you can throw them in the bin!"

  Mel stepped up to the counter. "How much for the liliums?" The smell of them was tantalising. It had been so long since she'd had any.

  The assistant looked at the florist, who didn't deign to reply. "O-on sssale today. Twenty dollars a bunch."

  Mel smiled. "How about those chocolates?"

  "Cost price plus GST," the florist said, her eyes showing her eagerness. "Thirty-three dollars."

  Mel held out her Visa card. "Can you make up a large bunch of three of these, along with the chocolates, please?"

  "Yes, ma'am," the assistant replied, trying to hide her smile from the florist as she made Mel's flowers as pretty as possible with pink paper and ribbon.

  Five minutes later, her nose buried in the unearthly scent of her enormous bunch of liliums, Mel carried her flowers and chocolates into the office.

  "Wow," said Lili as Mel passed her. "Who are they from?"

  "An admirer," Mel replied. An admirer of Asiatic liliums who couldn't walk past them, she thought but didn't say.

  Forty-One

  Mel placed her flowers in a vase on her desk by the window, where she could smell and admire them all day. She took a pair of scissors to the large box of chocolates, so they were easy to reach in their display tub.

  This was her favourite part.

  "Good morning, happy Valentine's Day!" she sang out, handing chocolates to all of her colleagues, or placing them on the keyboards and mouse mats of those staff who weren't in yet. "Happy Valentine's Day…"

  "Thank you," said Lili, looking stunned. "This is the only Valentine's present I've had in years."

  "Thank you," said Merih.

  "Happy Valentine's Day!" replied Gerry.

  "OH!" gasped Nybbas, turning red as he lost his ability for coherent speech.

  Mephi smiled at Mel – the first such smile Mel had seen. "That's really lovely of you, dear. My husband doesn't even know what day it is."

  Mel's smile wobbled with sympathy. What kind of life would it be, to live as a demon without love? She could barely imagine it. Wavering, she debated whether to give chocolate to the CEO, too. No one could be as lonely as Luce, the head demon himself, lusty looks and all. Perhaps she could just leave it with Mephi or on his desk. "Can you tell me if Luce is in?" Mel asked, peeking into the demon's office.

  "He's at a meeting, but he'll be back shortly. Why? Did you want to see him about something, dear?" Mephi asked. "If you do, I'll be happy to slip you into his schedule. Just let me know and I'll arrange it." She winked.

  "Ah, no, but thank you," Mel said quickly. "I just thought I should leave him a chocolate, too. In the interest of fairness…" She hurried to his desk, placed the gold heart on his mouse mat, then escaped before he returned.

  With a considerably lighter tub of chocolates, Mel returned to her desk. She unwrapped one of the gold foil hearts for herself. It wasn't like the foil colour made a difference to the taste, she thought, as the high-quality chocolate hit her tongue. She decided to have another one.

  Gabi bounced into Mel's office. Mortified at missing her fellow angel from Reception, Mel offered the girl her pick of the chocolates. Gabi took several with a smile of thanks as she announced, "You have a delivery!"

  Behind her, a courier struggled under an awkward armload of boxes. "Melody Angel?"

  Mel cringed inwardly at her full name, but smiled and nodded. "That's me."

  He carefully laid the boxes on the meeting table in the middle of the office. Heads rose above partitions, meerkat-style, turning toward her. "Sign here?"

  Mel signed his electronic pad with one hand, reaching for a chocolate with the other. She handed them both to him. "Thank you."

  He looked surprised.

  Mel smiled. "Happy Valentine's Day. Call it a small thank you."

  The courier left, looking somewhat bemused.

  "Go on, open them!" Gabi urged, her eyes shining.

  Mel cut the ribbon on the first long box. A dozen long-stemmed roses lay nestled in tissue paper, topped by red ribbon and a card. "From a secret admirer," the card read.

  The other two boxes contained identical displays, only differing in the handwriting on the cards. Mel leaned over the boxes in hope, but she was disappointed. The long-stemmed roses didn't smell. What was the point of giving roses anymore? Florists' roses didn't smell. It was the scent in the oil that was an aphrodisiac. Mel sighed as she remembered receiving scented roses. It seemed so long ago…wait, no it wasn't. There was that rose from the mysterious, disappearing stranger. The mature, red, thorny one that had made her think about…

  "So are you my Valentine?" Luce asked with a grin, appearing out of nowhere with a gold heart between his fingers.

  Mel's heart sank. She'd so hoped not to see him, watching his eyes wander as he said his insincere thanks. Too late now.

  "Mel's wonderful," Gabi gushed. "She brought chocolates for the whole office to share and she's been delivering them to everyone. So sweet of her!" Mel held her breath as Gabi held out her handful of hearts, making Luce's single one seem insignificant.

  Lili stuck her head in the office. "Thanks again, Mel!" She shoved her chocolate between her teeth as she withdrew.

  For the first time, Luce looked stunned. Mel wasn't sure if she wanted to laugh or cry at the demon's expression. He'd come in with such self-confidence and now he was crushed.

  "
I wasn't sure if I'd have enough for everyone, so I only gave people one each," Mel said quietly. "I'd be happy to give you more, if you'd like." She started to smile again. "But only if you don't tell everyone else. I'm not sure if I have enough for everyone to grab a whole handful like Gabi did."

  Gabi stuck her tongue out, then unwrapped a chocolate and popped it into her mouth.

  Luce's dark eyes stared at Mel as he held up his heart. "This is the first gift I've ever received for Valentine's Day. Thank you." His expression was all seriousness – but he appeared sincere for once, Mel thought.

  "You're welcome," she said with equal sincerity. She let her lips lift in a slight smile as Luce's scrutiny continued. A lesser angel might have looked away, but Mel was more than a match for poor, lonely Luce. She felt her sense of pity awaken.

  He glanced away.

  "Whose are those?" Luce asked, nodding at the boxed flowers.

  Gabi swallowed her chocolate with a gulp. "Mel's!" she said, appearing more excited than Mel.

  "Really?" Luce asked, looking Mel up and down. "You're a popular lady!" He hurried away without another word.

  Forty-Two

  "More for you, Mel!" Gabi sang out an hour later, interrupting Mel's lunchtime reading. She was quite growing to like the book about nephilim – the heroine reminded her strongly of Persi, with her penchant for shoes. She wondered if it was a distinctly nephilim quality or simply one Persi didn't share with the angelic half of her family heritage.

  This time, Gabi held a large display box of orchids, in shades of fuchsia, gold and white. Mel picked up the card. "For my office angel, with compliments from a secret admirer," she read. She recognised Luce's handwriting, for his not-complimentary written rant was still clear in her mind.

  Gabi didn't seem to want to leave. "Ohhhh, I love orchids," she cooed over the flowers. "Who sent you such beautiful ones?"

  Mel caught sight of Luce, watching her avidly from a nearby cubicle. She turned her eyes to the flowers. "They're really lovely," she admitted. She leaned over to sniff these, too, but she could feel the chill in the petals as soon as she got close. Fresh from a florist's fridge, these wouldn't smell until they warmed a little. Disappointed, she just smiled at Gabi before going back to her project. She lost herself in looking for graphics for the unit's new phone app.

  By the end of the day, Mel had moved both the orchids and the roses in their vases to the middle of the meeting table, where the whole office could admire the display. Only the liliums remained in the vase on her desk, still wrapped in paper, waiting for her to carry them home.

  Her computer clock ticked over to knock-off time, so she shut it down and rose. She stared at the orchids for a moment, wondering whether to take them. Gabi liked them so much – she didn't want to deprive the girl of her favourite flowers. She bent and inhaled deeply, hoping to catch the scent of them to help her decide.

  Nothing. The strongest smell came from the greenery surrounding the flowers.

  With a sigh, she straightened again. They were so pretty, which almost made up for the lack of smell. Still, it would be near impossible to manage the box of orchids and the bunch of liliums on the train – and there was no way she was leaving her liliums behind.

  She gathered her things and turned to go, her arms full of marbled pink and white blooms.

  "Don't forget your flowers," Luce said, striding into the office. "You might drive one of your Valentines to despair by leaving his gift behind."

  Mel smiled. "They're all from secret admirers. I thought we could all admire them here. Maybe having them on display will give some of the admirers the courage to admit who they are." Her eyes met Luce's and she knew the others would never say, for fear of his reaction. Poor Nybbas, Merih and Zaq. "I'll have my hands full on the train, anyway." She lifted her liliums up, so the divine scent wafted through the office again.

  "I could give you a lift home, if you like, and help you carry all of these down to my car," Luce offered eagerly. "We could go out for dinner afterwards. I know this wonderful seafood restaurant, right on the water, which does the best oysters…"

  "No, thank you," she said, edging past him. The last thing she needed was a demon – especially this demon – knowing her home address.

  "Come on, Mel, you won't get a better offer than The Old Brewery. Fresh oysters, wagyu beef cooked to perfection, marron…the beautiful view over Melville Water as the sun sets…and you'll be with me." His grin widened with each new temptation, as if he felt he was saving the best for last. Mel was sure that, in his opinion, this was the case.

  "Actually, I have plans for dinner already," she admitted.

  "Who with?" he asked. He may as well have asked for the details of a serial killer who needed to be put away for life, Mel thought, not liking his tone.

  "With the person who bought my liliums," she said gently.

  "The cheapest flowers the florist had," Luce scoffed. "You can do better than him. Stand him up – come out with me instead. I promise you'll enjoy it."

  "The flowers with the most alluring scent that the florist had, making them more than just beautiful," Mel corrected. "From someone who knows they're my favourite because of their perfume. Someone who didn't need to hide behind the anonymous name of Valentine or admirer." She looked Luce firmly in the eye. "Good night, Luce. I hope you enjoy your evening and your oysters. See you at work tomorrow."

  She strode out, not slowing her step until it had carried her into the train carriage and the doors slid shut behind her.

  A kind man offered Mel his seat and she took it gratefully, balancing the flowers between her knees. She held her phone out and looked for a short story to help her pass the time on the train, having finished the nephilim book at lunch.

  While she searched, she heard a familiar voice.

  "So, did you get her present?" the annoyed anti-Valentine of the morning enquired.

  "Yep, flowers, chocolates and some earrings," replied the other. "We're going out to dinner tonight, at that new teppanyaki grill at Nishi. You?"

  "My missus booked us into Beethoven's, for their special Valentine's banquet," the now-more-stunned-than-annoyed voice replied. "Have you ever been there?"

  "No, but I've heard it's good. Have fun, mate!"

  Mel hid her smile behind her flowers. The two men who wouldn't go to restaurants had booked dinner at two of the more expensive establishments in the area, but she knew from experience that the prices at both were certainly worth it.

  She found a short story competition with a Valentine's Day theme and settled in to read some of the entries. Romance, unusual gifts and her favourite day of the year, with flowers and chocolate to scintillate her senses as she forgot all about Luce and his devious demands.

  She happily headed home, ordered a pizza and opened a bottle of wine to share with herself. Amid the scent of her favourite flowers, she thought of Luce, dining alone amid a multitude of couples, lonely with his oysters by the river. Once again, she pitied the demon and anyone else who couldn't enjoy a day that was about love – whoever you spent it with. Perhaps she should have joined him. He would have spent the whole time ogling her and missing out on the lovely atmosphere places only had on Valentine's Day.

  Poor Luce. It must be so sad to be a demon on days like this.

  Forty-Three

  Mel felt self-conscious as she stepped into the office. On the train, she'd been talking to a particularly talented artist who'd admitted to painting pictures inspired by the books she'd read and the discussion had turned to mermaids. What Mel hadn't said was that she knew for a fact that mermaids existed – and she'd met some. She and the demons could pass as humans among humans, but with mermaids it was a completely different story.

  She dropped her bag on her desk, glancing at the big south window. Her computer was already on, which seemed strange.

  "Good morning!" boomed a voice behind her. "What are you looking for?"

  Spinning on the spot, Mel came face to face with a man she'd neve
r met before. "I'm looking for my coffee cup, so I can have some caffeine before I check my emails," she replied uncertainly.

  "Oh, were you the girl who borrowed my desk while I was away? I had your clutter moved to the desk by the fire escape, where it belongs." He dismissed her with a wave of his hand. "Try looking over there." He enthroned himself on what had been Mel's desk chair and ignored her as he placed his hand possessively over her former mouse.

  Mel summoned a smile. "Thank you," she said as she left the bright shared office to return to the cramped, dark desk by the fire escape.

  Gabi was waiting for her with a box full of Mel's belongings, the box of orchids balanced precariously on top. As soon as she saw Mel, her expression turned from bewildered to sad. "Mel, some new man told me I had to pack up all your things and move them. I didn't know what else to do – you weren't here and neither was Lili…"

  Mel was calm and collected. As temporary staff, even her desk was only a temporary arrangement. Today, she wouldn't have to worry about showing off her stockings to everyone on the plaza. She could wear skirts as short as she pleased. "No worries, Gabi. It was too bright by the big south window and the air conditioning couldn't cope with the sun coming in on hot days. Thanks for taking such good care of my things. Now, if the rumours I heard downstairs on my way in are correct, we're very well placed for…"

  The fire alarm began to sound over the office PA system. Gabi's eyes widened. The beeping lengthened to whooping as Mel smiled. They were the first to evacuate via the fire escape stairs.

  Standing in Central Park as all the other staff meandered in, Gabi said, "You'll have to take your angel orchids home. They won't survive without some sun."

  Mel shrugged. "Cut flowers never last long, anyway. They were lovely while they lasted – much longer than the roses, at least."

  Gabi's eyes grew round. "Your angel orchids aren't cut flowers. They're in a beautiful pot, with soil and everything. I've been watering them for you every week – it was the least I could do, in exchange for you sharing them with me. It was heavy, but I couldn't just leave them there!"