Innocence

by Kristin Mayer

  A warrant was issued for trespassing and a few other charges to increase the sentence regarding animal cruelty.

  Of course, we were unable to find her. I wanted her out of our lives and away from our son.

  I pushed the thoughts aside. Eventually, Crystal would reemerge when she needed something. Drugs drove people to do crazy things.

  This afternoon, Ty and I were headed into town with Levi and Pam to get haircuts. It would be a miracle to get Jaxson away from the ranch with all he had planned.

  This morning we were simply hanging out as a family. A much-welcomed rest time.

  The doorbell rang.

  “I’ll get it,” I called from the kitchen as Ty and Jaxson wrestled in the living room while I baked cookies.

  Dwayne stood on the front porch with a package. “Hey, Dwayne.”

  “Hey, London. A couple of packages arrived at the gate for Jaxson. Levi asked me to deliver them.”

  “Thanks.” I took the two slender, square brown boxes. “Have a good day, Dwayne. Is everything okay at the clinic?”

  “Yes. We’ll let you know if we need anything. I’m glad he’s taking the morning off.”

  “Me too.” We said our goodbyes and I closed the door. Leaning against the doorframe, I watched as Ty worked on besting Jaxson. His muscles strained to push his dad off. Jaxson animatedly rolled to the side, praising Ty’s strength. They were two peas in a pod. A wave of dizziness came over me and I perched against the couch. I took a moment before I said anything. “Dwayne said this package arrived for you at the gate.”

  The lights within Jaxson’s green eyes danced with excitement. “Those are a surprise for you. Leave them on the couch. No peaking.”

  “Me? When do I get to open it?”

  He teased knowing how much I loved surprises. “We’ll see.”

  “Jaxson!”

  Ty jumped on top of Jaxson pretending to be a super hero. And the play fighting started all over again. I’d have to wait until later to persuade my husband to give me more details.

  My phone rang. I answered smiling. “Hey, Millie.”

  “My word. Sounds like you have a crazy house this morning.”

  I chuckled. “Jaxson and Ty are wrestling. What are you doing?”

  “Packing for the McCole Classic! And I’m bringing my 90210 seasons. We’re having a girls’ night chick-a-dee.”

  I yawned. “I can’t wait.”

  “Girl, are you tired? It’s only like nine in the morning.”

  I made my way back to the bedroom and yawned again. “I haven’t been sleeping well. I think the stress of everything is catching up.”

  “Are you sure you’re not preggers?” Millie said it jokingly, but my heart raced at the thought.

  “Yes, I’ve been taking my pills regularly. I started cramping this morning. I’ll start by tomorrow.”

  “Okay. Sorry. I know the nurse comes out in me sometimes.”

  Quickly, I rethought over the last few weeks and looked at my birth control packet. Every pill was taken. I was on the right day. I had the flu. The flu. Did Jaxson give me my pills on time? I focused on this morning when I saw spotting. That was normal for me. By tomorrow, I would have my period. Internally, I sighed with relief. We had enough going on right now. I definitely wanted children, but when the time was right.

  “It’s okay. I need to take the cookies out. I can’t wait for you guys to get here.”

  “Me either. Give my love to the boys.”

  “I will.”

  Leaving the bedroom, I found Ty coloring at the table. “Where’s your dad?”

  “In the office.”

  I ruffled his hair as I went to find Jaxson. As soon as Jaxson saw me, he put a bag in the drawer. “Now, that’s cruel, teasing me like that.”

  “I can’t wait to give it to you.” Jaxson approached and gave me a kiss. “You look like a woman on a mission. What’s on your mind?”

  Chewing on my lip, I asked, “Did you give me my birth control pills while I had the flu?”

  “Yeah, I did. Millie reminded me. Never missed a day.”

  No antibiotics were taken. Only fever reducer. Everything was fine. I let out a breath I wasn’t aware I was holding. “Okay. She just mentioned the word pregnant because of how off I’ve been feeling and I freaked a little. I should be over the flu by now.”

  Excitement danced across Jaxson’s face which confused me. I thought he’d be a nervous wreck talking about babies with everything else we had going on. “You think you’re pregnant?”

  “No. I don’t. I haven’t missed a pill. You don’t have to worry.”

  Jaxson’s hand went to my stomach causing it to flip-flop. “London, I would be thrilled for you to be pregnant.”

  “You would?” The feelings became more confusing. Per previous discussions, we were waiting for a while to adjust to married life.

  He kissed me. “Yes, sweetheart. Do you want me to get a test to make sure?”

  “Would you mind?”

  “Not at all.”

  Now, I wasn’t sure what I wanted the pregnancy test to say.

  Jaxson and I leaned against the counter while we waited for the test to render its verdict. I stared at the stick wondering what fate it would yield against the black granite countertops. It was like a beacon teasing me with an unrevealed answer.

  Ty went to Pam’s to play with Mallory. Jaxson was calm about the entire situation—truly seeming open to the idea of having a kid.

  I chanced a glance at Jaxson who watched me. “What’s on your mind, London?”

  “It’s just that the thought being pregnant scared me to death this morning. Now as I look at the stick, I’m not sure what I think.”

  Sitting me on the counter, Jaxson positioned himself between my legs. His lips grazed against my jaw. “If you’re pregnant, it will be one of the happiest days of my life.” The words warmed me. He nibbled my earlobe. “If you’re not, we’ll keep practicing until we’re ready.” His tongue came out and tasted me. “I have you as my wife. That’s all I need.”

  “Jaxson—” My breathy reply was interrupted by the timer going off.

  The stick was in Jaxson hand as he tilted it to me.

  Not Pregnant

  Those damn tears wanted to be known again and I wasn’t sure why. “Now, we get to practice while we’re alone. I fully accept the challenge.”

  As Jaxson carried me to the bedroom, the sadness abated quickly. Practicing would be fun.

  Pam, Levi, Ty and I all left the hairdresser.

  Not knowing where Crystal was had me on edge while we were in town. It was no wonder why I had been all over the place emotionally over the last couple of weeks, with all the additional stress she brought into our lives.

  Ty helped keep my thoughts occupied as we passed by a pet store with puppies in the window. He sighed as he touched the glass. “I want a puppy so bad, Mom.”

  I ruffled his freshly-cut hair which had him ducking out of the way. “I know, buddy. They’re a big responsibility. We’ll keep talking about it. Okay?”

  “Okay. But, it would be funner if we just got it.”

  “I know.”

  The storefront decorations had a fall-like feel that reminded me of pumpkins and Halloween. Last night, Ty and I convinced Jaxson to dress up with us for Halloween. As what . . . we weren’t sure. Ty and I were going to brainstorm this weekend.

  Swinging my arm, Ty gave me a smile. “Can we sip some lemonade on the front porch today?”

  “Oh, we could do some warm apple cider since it’s chilly.” Ty beamed at me, still thriving on motherly attention. He would never be lacking in love from me. “You know Granddad and Aunt Millie are coming tomorrow.”

  He jumped, nearly taking my arm with him. “I know! I want to go fishing with Grandpa and Granddad.”

  “I bet that can be arranged.”

  Stopping in front of the pharmacy, Pam said, “Hey, London. Are you okay on time if we run in here to get Levi’s prescription?�
��

  This afternoon, the caterer was coming to the house to go over the final numbers for the event. “Yes, we have plenty of time. We’ll head to the car and pick you guys up.”

  “Sounds perfect.”

  Ty and I traipsed down the sidewalk until we came to the crosswalk while talking about our afternoon plans. Fall wreaths adorned the light poles in preparation for the Fall Festival in three weeks. Something we were all looking forward to attending. I was anxious to make a homemade apple pie and other things Mom and I made every fall.

  Halfway across the wide crosswalk, an engine revved distancing me from the conversation Ty and I were having about a future puppy. I stopped momentarily and looked around. Ty tugged my hand. “Did you hear me, Mom?”

  The engine revved again and I zeroed in on the location kitty-cornered from us. Someone with a baseball cap stared in my direction. An uneasy feeling danced along my spine. Grabbing Ty’s hand, I started walking again as the old beat-up blue car shot out from the parking space.

  The engine sped.

  The car was heading right at us.

  Ty.

  I panicked.

  It took a few seconds for it to register and start moving faster. We weren’t going to make it to the other side in time. The only thing slowing the car’s progress was the squealing tires.

  Keep Ty safe. It was all I could think of as I jerked him up and ran.

  My heart sped up.

  I wasn’t going to make it.

  There wasn’t time.

  Save Ty.

  The car was close. Too close. In a moment of panic, I tossed Ty as far away as possible.

  Screams filled the air.

  He was scared. I was scared. I took off down the street away from my son. The car was closing in. I hurled myself across the next car hoping there was enough distance from Ty. Something struck my side and as I tumbled back to the ground.

  Burnt rubber filled my nose before everything faded to . . . black.

  BEEP.

  Whoosh.

  Beep.

  Whoosh.

  Beep.

  Whoosh.

  My body ached as the outside world permeated my distant thoughts. I felt like I was stuck in the abyss not knowing which way was up or down. A voice. A voice I loved spoke in the background.

  Jaxson.

  He was worried. Upset. I wasn’t sure. I kept moving through the thick sludge trying to find the source of the voice. There was no sense of time.

  A slight pressure on my hand helped further bring me to the surface. I was so close. Maybe if I squeezed back, he would know I was here.

  “London! Ken, she squeezed my hand! London! London, sweetheart! Call the nurse! She squeezed my hand!”

  The clearly worried voice rushed me to the surface as my eyes fluttered open. “Jax—” My voice silenced not wanting to work.

  Forms took shape as Jaxson leaned over me, his five o’clock shadow prominent. How long was I out? “Thank God, you’re awake.” His hands gently stroked my face. “Sweetheart, don’t move. The doctors are on their way.”

  I cleared my throat, attempting to speak again. “What happened?”

  “Crystal ran you over.”

  Choppy images of the hairdresser, then the sidewalk, then running with Ty. Tossing him. I tried to sit up. “Ty?”

  Jaxson gently pressed me down against the white cotton sheets. His was wearing his red, faded, wrinkly T-shirt. How long had I been here? “Ty is okay. You saved him. He’s in the cafeteria getting dinner with my parents.”

  I relaxed minutely. “Crystal?”

  “Is in police custody. She’s been arrested for attempted murder on two counts.” Jaxson sat in the chair and rubbed soothing circles on my hand.

  The doctor came in. The white of his coat was bright, matched with a gleaming telescope. “Good morning, London. How are you feeling?”

  “Confused. Groggy. How long have I been out?”

  “A little over a day.” He checked a few things on the clipboard he carried. “From the impact, you had a concussion and some minor swelling. Your ribs are bruised, but the baby is fine.”

  “Ty. Yes, Ty is fine.”

  The doctor paused and looked at Jaxson. A silent message passed between them. Everything still swirled about some and was hard to process and focus fully. The doctor focused on me as he put the stethoscope up to his ears. “Let’s get you checked up.”

  After looking me over, the doctor was pleased with what he saw. I’d be released in two days if all went well. There was a lot of stuff said that got lost in all the fuzziness.

  Dad kissed my forehead. “I’m going to give you and Jaxson a few minutes while I get Ty, punkin’. He’s been anxious for you to wake up.”

  “Okay, Daddy. I can only imagine.”

  Jaxson held my hand between both of his. He swallowed hard, then looked at me with happiness. “London, the baby the doctor talked about earlier wasn’t Ty.”

  “What?”

  With his hand on my stomach, Jaxson continued. “The pregnancy test was wrong. We’re pregnant.”

  “What?”

  Moving to sit on the edge of the mattress, Jaxson brought my hand to his lips. “Sweetheart, we’re pregnant. It’s early on and the test wasn’t able to detect it. It came back in the blood work.”

  “A baby? We’re pregnant?” My hand squeezed his as he searched my eyes. Was it true? Was the test wrong?

  He knelt beside me while placing a feather kiss on the spot our child grew. “We’re pregnant. Our baby is growing right here.” I was speechless as I watched Jaxson place a few more kisses on my stomach before looking up. “Are you upset?”

  “No. I could never be upset about having our child inside me. I’m still so tired. But, I love you, Ty, and this baby.”

  “Sleep, London. I won’t leave you.”

  The darkness claimed me.

  I felt a poke on my nose. “Ty, if you touch your Mom one more time, we’re going to have a timeout.”

  “Yes, Dad.” The defeated voice had me lightly chuckling, reminding me of the bruising on my ribs. “Mom! Mom! Mom!”

  My eyes opened to find Ty standing on a chair only inches from my face. “Hey, sweet boy.”

  “I’m going to be a big brother. You and Dad said I’d have to wait, but you were wrong.” Ty puffed his chest out as he stood straight in the chair. “I’m going to show the baby how to do all sorts of cool stuff.”

  The hand went to my stomach as I remembered the news. “You are going to be a big brother. I’m going to need your help.”

  A hand came on top of mine. Jaxson’s. Ty beamed. Pam and Levi sat in the corner while my dad stood at the door.

  Pam gave Levi a hug and looked at me. “I cannot wait to have another grandbaby to spoil.”

  “If it’s a boy, can we name him Bumblebee like the Transformers guy? I like that name.” Nodding to himself, Ty clearly approved of the choice. I noticed he had on his Transformer T-Shirt which probably sparked the decision. Tomorrow it might be Donatello if we were playing with Ninja Turtles.

  Jaxson shook his head amused. “We’ll see, son.”

  Ty turned serious as he sat in the chair. “Grama says we won’t know what the baby is for a while. But if it’s a girl, will she be able to still play cars with me?”

  “Of course.”

  As we talked, my hand stayed on my stomach as I thought about the child growing within me. Jaxson caught me several times and was unable to hide the broad answering grin.

  As visiting hours came to a close, I received kisses and hugs from everyone as they left. All of the love filled me. The nurse looked expectantly at Jaxson. Sternly he spoke. “I nearly lost my pregnant wife. I’m not leaving her.”

  There was a standoff before the nurse rolled her eyes and walked off. I commented, “I think you may have made an enemy of the nurse.”

  Jaxson was back at my side rubbing my stomach. “I don’t care. I’m not leaving you or our little one. London, that bitch nearly c
ost me you, Ty, and an unborn child. Mom and Dad said if you hadn’t tossed him . . .”

  He took a deep breath and I stroked his face. “We’re fine. All three of us are fine. Crystal is in police custody.”

  “I have my lawyers working on it so she never sees the fucking light again. She’s claiming the voices told her. Bitch.”

  “Climb up in bed and sleep with me. It’ll help.”

  “London, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  I further tempted him as I played dirty, but knew it would get me near him. “You can be near me and the baby all night.”

  Jaxson toed off his shoes and slid beside me careful not to touch my sore ribs. “Did I hurt Ty when I threw him? He seemed okay.”

  As the strong arms of my husband wrapped around me, the nightmares were chased away.

  “Only a couple of scrapes. He was pretty shaken up. There was blood from your head injury. A lot of it. He’s been up here with me most of the time watching you.”

  “I love him like my own.”

  “I know you do.”

  His hand splayed across my stomach. “I can’t wait to meet this one.”

  “Me either.”

  Jaxson kissed my neck and I sunk back into him. “Rest, sweetheart.”

  My eyes closed and I fell into a deep comforting sleep.

  THE CLOSING OF A DOOR awakened me. The bed was empty.

  “Jaxson?” Only silence and the sterile hospital smell greeted me. “Jaxson?”

  A shadow moved and I nearly screamed until the familiar voice spoke. “Hello, London.”

  “Caroline?”

  There was a sneer to her voice which told me something was all wrong. I pushed the nurse’s button to be safe. Why was she here in the middle of the night? Why was she in Colorado?

  The room was mostly bathed in darkness. “Yes, it’s me. Thought I would pay you a visit.”

  The sarcasm in her voice was off. Not like the normal Caroline I was used to and came to love. Something was wrong. “Where’s Jaxson?”

  “Detained. Don’t worry. We won’t be interrupted. If you scream, know I’ll have the boy killed.”

  Ice chilled my veins as the answer presented itself. I felt the thump, thump, thump of my pulse. I moistened my lips. This was bad. Very very bad. “Why are you here?” My voice came out weaker than I intended.