Back to You

by Annie Brewer

  “How are you doing?”

  I wait a few minutes, no response. As I’m sitting half way in the car with my feet hanging over the seat, head down staring at my phone as if I can somehow telepathically convince Brooke to text me back I hear foot steps coming toward me. Thinking its Brady I don’t look up.

  “Why are you hiding out here?” I look up and see Lucas and my heart races. Just the sound of his voice affects me instantly and I find my body reacting, in the most alluring way.

  “I was texting Brooke to make sure she got home okay. She was drunk and puking earlier, so Matt took her home. I’m kind of worried about her.” He leans on the car next to me playing with the hem of his shirt. “Yeah, I saw her dancing with him earlier. She’s cute when she’s drunk. As long as I’ve known her, I’ve never been more attracted to her.” We both laugh. “So how long have you been here? I hadn’t seen you since I walked in at ten. Well, aside from, ya know.” I stop talking and blush, red as an apple.

  “By the way, you are mean for leaving me all alone like that I hope you know.” I bat my eyes dramatically. “Yea, I know. Believe me I wanted to stay, as long as you wanted me to. It’s not easy for me to be near you and not able to touch you, or even hold your hand.” I smile at his sweet comment, wishing it was easier for me too.

  “I know. I’m sorry. I just need to figure out what I want. I mean I know I want you, but I’m afraid to take that chance with you again. Besides, I don’t like hurting Brady. He’s a great guy. Ugh, this is so complicating!.” I start getting frustrated, mostly because I haven’t heard back from Brooke yet. I quickly send her another text. Lucas puts his hand over mine to calm my trembling.

  “Hey, relax. I said I will wait for however long you need. I didn’t mean to upset you.” The sincerity in his eyes makes me feel worse. I don’t want to let him down either. I place my other hand on top of his and rub my thumb over his knuckles. It feels totally soothing and calming, and I suddenly get the urge to throw him down in the back of this car. As if reading my thoughts, he pulls his hand away and stands up straight. “I wish we could too Abby. You have no idea.” And he starts walking away. I let out a chuckle and pull him back to me, meeting him for a quick kiss. My tongue slips into his mouth and caresses his ever so lightly, and it feels so good. I wrap my arms around his neck backing us up against the car. His hands around my waist move downward a little. I open my eyes and pull back slightly, observing. He’s out of breath and clearly enjoying the moment as much as I am. But that moment has ended too soon. “Look, I’ve got to go back inside before Brady freaks out. I want him to take me home now.” He looks at me curiously.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yes, I just need to go home and away from you before things go a little too far, and we don’t want to regret anything. Besides, here is not the ideal place to do anything. Not like this.” He gives me a kiss on the forehead and takes my chin in his hand, staring directly into my eyes as if he can see all the answers to every question he wants to ask me. “Okay, get home safe. I’m going to head out myself. It’s been an exhausting but eventful night.” He gives me a wink and I blush.

  “Yes it has.” I tease, punching his arm lightly.

  “Have pleasant dreams Abigail.” He smiles and leaves. I realize that I haven’t really been called by my actual name unless my mother is angry with me. I find myself enjoying my real name on his lips. His full and luscious lips that make my lips tingle when they touch. My phone buzzes in my hand and I look down seeing Brooke’s name. Relief hits me when she tells me she’s doing better but she’ll call me tomorrow as soon as she wakes up. I can relax now.

  I go back inside to search for Brady and I don’t find him anywhere. Suddenly, I spot him out back by the pool. I walk out there and notice that he is actually in the pool, fully clothed, playing volleyball with a bunch of people. I get the urge to just take his car and leave him there. But he sees me before I have a chance to make a getaway.

  “Oh hey Abby, wanna join us? We’re playin’-“ I hear his slurred words, noticing he’s pretty drunk. Great. How am I supposed to get home now? I walk over to where he is standing in the pool and lean down. “Hey, you’re drunk. I wanted to go home now.”

  “Oh baby, come on. Stay, have some more beer and play ball with us. We need more players anyway.” I get very irritated because I notice his pupils are dilated.

  “Are you high?” I’m furious now and stand up.

  “Look I’m calling my mom to come pick me up. I’m tired and have lost the desire to party at this point.” He puts his head down in shame and nods.

  “I’m sorry, the guys offered and I kind of felt like getting high tonight with them and just kickin’ back. You know I don’t really do that shit.” I sometimes wish I could get high, but I don’t actually do it. I’d be a hypocrite if I did, after yelling at Sarah for smoking weed. That thought sets me over the edge, but I keep my composure.

  “Well, I’m going to wait out front for my mom. I’ll call you tomorrow or something. Have fun.” I kiss him and wave to everyone as if they care I’m leaving. Some party this turned out to be. Brooke goes home shit faced and puking and now Brady’s high as a kite and I’m left alone to party with myself. I would have been better off staying home. I dismiss that thought as my memory refreshes. Images of Lucas and I on the bed making out, come back full force. Okay, so the party wasn’t totally lame. A smile creeps on my lips, as an idea comes to mind. I take my phone out of my purse and dial the number.

  “Hey Abby.” My heart rate speeds up at his voice.

  “Hey, how far are you?”

  “Why? Need a ride home?” I’m embarrassed to admit that my boyfriend ditched me to get high and drunk but I don’t care at this point.

  “Yeah, Brady is still partying but I wanted to go home. Could you come get me, if you’re not too far?” I can feel, through his voice, that he is smiling on the other side of the phone even though I can’t see him.

  “Yeah, I’ll be right there.”

  Five minutes later Lucas pulls up in front of me, smiling. Either he was driving like a bat out of Hell or left not long ago. He rolls the passenger side window down.

  “Hey, I forgot to leave Brady’s keys here. I’ll be right back.” I quickly run back inside and set the keys on the counter with a note that says, Brady Wilson’s Keys Touch at your own risk

  I come back out, laughing to myself, when I see Lucas checking himself out in the mirror. I hold my hand over my mouth as I stifle a laugh, making sure he can’t hear me. He looks over and sees me approaching, my face turning crimson.

  “Um, I was just making sure I had nothing on my face. And you know-“ He waves his hand in the air.

  “Oh what the Hell, you caught me.” We both laugh as I get in the car and close the door. His mint green Mustang is in neat condition, for a guy. The floorboard is immaculate as if it was never touched. I look in the back and see a few things on the floor behind his seat. But the rest looks relatively clean, which impresses me. But I’m not sure why it surprises me; he’s always been a neat freak whereas Brady is the total opposite. His truck is a total mess, as is his room. It seems there is no middle ground between them, one is a pig and one is a compulsive germaphobe. I guess I’m kind of in the middle, I like things neat and orderly but I don’t freak out if things get a little messy here and there. You can’t always be organized.

  The car ride is silent part of the way. I’m lost in my thoughts and he seems to enjoy the quiet drive through the mountains, although it’s dark outside. “So what did Brady say when you told him I was taking you home?” I’m brought back to reality when Lucas starts asking questions with a cocky grin on his face.

  “I told him my mom was picking me up.” I look out the window to keep from staring at him. “Besides, he probably won’t remember much anyway. He was high when I left. I swear what is it with people enjoying that shit anyway? I mean, sure I’d done it a few times but it didn’t really engage me. Between Sarah and now Brady, seriousl
y I need new friends.” He laughs and runs his fingers through his hair.

  “Well, I can tell you one thing, weed does make you feel good. But everyone is affected by it differently. It never really appealed to me either, so could I be one of your new friends?” That made me smile.

  “So where to little lady?” I give a questionable look.

  “Seriously? It’s like three in the morning. Nothing is open and I’m usually asleep in my bed, in my own little world right now.” I chide myself for that last part.

  “Yeah, dreaming about me I hear.” He chuckles and I punch him hard in the arm. I did leave that door wide open, and he’s not one to ever back down from a snarky comeback.

  “Ow! What the Hell? I was just being honest.” I look away and blush beet red.

  “It’s really cute though.” He teases.

  “What’s cute?” I ask, inquisitively and a little shy.

  “Your vulnerable side, it’s cute. I like that side of you.”

  “Yeah, well don’t get used to it.” He looks disappointed and sighs.

  “Well, what did you have in mind?” I ask, curious and a little intrigued.

  He smiles wide, eyebrows raised. “I know just the place.”

  Chapter 12

  We pull into the parking lot of IHOP, my stomach growls at the thought of food, remembering I hadn’t really eaten much today. I look at Lucas, eye brows raised.

  “IHOP is your perfect place?” I ask. He shuts off the engine. “Yeah, it’s the only place open at this time and I’m hungry. Besides I’m not ready to go home.” Then as an afterthought he adds, “Or take you home yet either.”

  I nod and take my seat belt off. “Well, my stomach sure isn’t protesting.” I add getting out of the car. We walk inside, it’s pretty dead which considering the hour, I’m not surprised. The girl at the front has her head down, when she sees us enter; she smiles so wide I think her mouth is going to shatter like glass. Well, she smiles at Lucas, I just get a nice glare.

  “Hi, how many?” She asks in her obvious fake high pitched Barbie voice. “Two please.” Lucas replies in a genuine tone. She shows off her dazzling white teeth and says “Okay, right this way.” She has a sway to her walk, which if she had heels on, I bet she’d literally trip over her own feet. I wouldn’t doubt that she would do it on purpose, so she could have Lucas rescue her. Seriously, this is lame. She sits us at a booth on the right side of the restaurant. “Ashley, your server, will be right with you. If you need anything else, I’ll be at the front.” She says, while standing with one knee bent, hands on hips and lips pursed. She is speaking directly to Lucas as if I wasn’t even here in front of her face. Then she winks and saunters off. “Thank you.” Lucas mumbles, watching her leave while I’m staring at him in disbelief.

  He turns his attention to me. “What?” I shake my head and skim over my menu. “Nothing.” He starts to laugh and I look up at him. “What’s so funny now?” He sets his menu down, clasping his fingers together on the table.

  “I find it cute how jealous you get.” I almost choke on my own saliva. “Excuse me?” Jealous? I don’t think so. That girl practically threw herself at you. It was really ridiculous and quite lame. If she was going for the subtle approach, clearly she sucks at it.”

  “I don’t think she was going for subtle. It was obvious she was trying to get a rise out of you.” I pick my menu back up and continue looking at the items to choose from. “Besides we aren’t even together so I have no reason to be jealous. You can flirt with whomever you want.” He places his hand over my menu, bringing it down to the table, forcing me to look at him. “Abby.” I see a flick of hurt in his eyes.

  “What?” He lifts his hand from my menu and browses his, avoiding eye contact. “Nevermind.”

  I start feeling bad for what I’d said. I know what I have to do. I set my menu down and fold my hands together on the table, willing him to look at me. He does. Our gazes bore into each other as if we’re the only two people in the world. The rest of the world falls away. He smiles slightly, I smile back shyly.

  “Hi, I’m Ashley; I’ll be your waitress. Can I get you two something to drink?”

  “I’ll have coffee with cream please.” I reply never taking my eyes off of his, vaguely aware of her presence.

  “I’ll just have water thanks.” Lucas says, our gazes still locked tension brewing. The waitress, Ashley I think her name was watches us for a minute before walking to the kitchen. It’s moments like this I wish I had some supernatural power I could use to transport us somewhere else. Alone. I clear my throat and begin. “Lucas, I. I want you. I want you so bad I can taste you.”

  He raises his eyebrows in surprise but smiles. “I’ve never been the type to cheat. That’s not me. That’s not my style. But it’s like that saying ‘there’s a first time for everything’ and this may be one of those times.” I let out a big breath. “It may not make sense, or it may not work out but I can’t deny it anymore. Like I said, I’m not the cheating kind, but being with you feels right. I can’t concentrate, I can’t breathe when you’re near and you’re all I think about when I’m not. It may make me a bad person. But at this point I don’t care anymore.”

  He takes my hand, rubbing my palm with his thumbs. My train of thought goes out the window and all of my muscles in my body seize up. He makes me feel like I can fly. The waitress comes back with our drinks, setting them down on the table.

  “Do you know what you want to eat yet?” It’s obvious we have no clue and she seems a bit perturbed. “I’m not that hungry so I will just have a Chicken Caesar salad please.” I close my menu and shove it at her. I look to Lucas who is still deciding. Ashley looks flabbergasted at my rudeness. “I’ll have a cheeseburger, well done please. Thanks.” He gently hands her his menu then turns back to me. “So what do we do Abby?” I fidget with my hands for a minute avoiding the subject.

  “Well, I’m not ready to tell anyone yet. We have to act like everything is the same, nothing’s changed. We’re just friends more or less.” On second thought, “You need to break it off with Sarah. But do it gently.” He half snorts, half laughs. “I’m serious Lucas. Please.” I plead. “Okay. But what about Brady?”

  “I’ll tell him, eventually. Just give me some time. We’ll tell everyone then.” He studies me, unsure of my motives.

  “In the mean time, we’ll sneak time in whenever we can.” His eyes go wide in surprise, at the absurdity of the situation. “Wait, you mean sneak around? You?” I laugh. “That’s what I said. Like I said before, there’s a first time for everything.”

  As we finish our food, I push my plate away. “Ugh, I’m so full. How ‘bout you?” Lucas finishes his last bite, stacks the plates and pushes them to the corner of the table. “Um, yeah I’m done I think. I could go for more water though.” Noticing me stare at him in amazement, he gets a little self-conscious and wipes at his face. There are no traces of crumbs around his mouth.

  “What? Do I have something on my face?” I shake my head, smiling at his cute act. “No, there’s nothing on your face. I’m just delighted to be sitting here with you like this.” I lean into the table, serious; crossing my arms over each other. “Abby you better watch out, your bad girl image is a huge turn on.” I smile seductively.

  “Thanks for tonight. This sure beats being at home in my bed asleep any day.” I say. “Really? Even if you were dreaming of me?” I take a sip of my coffee, looking at him over the rim of my cup. “Mmm. The real thing is better than my dreams for sure.”

  He winks at me and of course I blush, crimson so red; you would think I was palpable. I’ve never felt this arousing sensation before with Brady. When Lucas and I were first together, we were young and immature. But now that I’m older, I know my feelings are real and mean something, not like the crushes I used to get back then. He pays the check and pats my hand, bringing me back to the present.

  “Let’s go get you home.” Home, the last place I want to be. We get out of our seats and walk toward
s the door. “Have a nice night. Come back and see us soon!” The hostess says as we walk by. Lucas walks past and I glance at her, noticing the pout she is displaying for the sake of grabbing Lucas’s attention, which has no affect. We’re outside and I say, “Aw, you’ve upset your biggest fan. She was pouting like a two year old.” He laughs as he unlocks my door and opens it, I slip in.

  “Well, I’m sure the next guy that walks in will make her forget all about me.” He gets in and sits in silence, staring out the window. I can feel the air shift. I put my hand over his, which is resting on his knee, trying to calm his shaking.

  “Hey, are you okay?” He nods and looks at me. He leans over the center console and kisses me. He wraps his arm around my neck, his other in my hair. It gets a little uncomfortable so I move over and straddle him in his seat. He reclines his seat and we fall back with it. We both laugh, and then look at each other, mesmerized by the other. “I love you Abby. I love-“

  I cut him off with my lips on his, slipping my tongue ever so lightly into his mouth and playfully rubbing his tongue. He grazes his hands up and down my back which sends a shockwave through my entire system. I can’t get enough of him. I almost want to tell him that I want him here and now in his car, like I did in my dream. But that is not appealing to me. Actually that’s a lie; it’s more than appealing to me. But I really want our first time to be special. I feel his hands slide under my shirt and lightly stroke below my bra strap. I moan and kiss his stomach, sending trails of kisses from his neck down to his navel. His jeans are inviting, practically begging me to snap open the buttons. But that will have to wait for another day. I lean back trying to slow my breathing. Lucas leans against me and grabs my face kissing me tenderly. I melt into his touch, like butter on toasted bread.