Who We Are

by Nicola Haken

  I felt like we had that now, and it was beautiful.

  Once Seb had left for work, I called in sick to the salon, but told Claire I’d be back tomorrow. The cough persisted, but the wheeze had eased and I couldn’t afford to miss another day’s pay. Plus, cabin fever had set in, giving me the hump and making me miserable. If I stared at the random grey stain on the magnolia wall, trying to decipher where it came from, any longer I think I might’ve gone insane and stabbed someone.

  That’s why I spent Monday feeling sorry for myself downstairs on my couch instead of in bed. I watched daytime TV, slept for a while, and stepped back into my childhood by drinking hot Ribena that Seb bought to help soothe my sore throat. It made me think of my mum. She only used to buy the blackcurrant drink when I was poorly because it was expensive, so sometimes I’d fake it because it’s bloody delicious. It’s something I carried on for Ty, too. Whenever he fell ill, whatever the cause, I’d rush out for a bottle of the good stuff.

  Seb rang throughout the day to check on me, on every rest break and after each of his drops. Even Tyler sent a text at dinnertime asking how I was. I must’ve looked sicker than I thought I did, which shouldn’t have been a shock given that I felt like a maggot-infested turd that’d been run over six times. Still…it was almost worth it for the extra time I got to spend with Seb this weekend. Although, I looked forward to recovering. We still needed to celebrate exchanging those three sweet words.

  By Tuesday, I felt less like a walking corpse and more like a regular human with an irritating cough. I managed to survive work at the salon, and a visit from Rhys, but my ribs still hurt like a motherfucker. My chest ached too, but I put that down to missing Seb. He was stuck in his truck overnight, somewhere down south. He stayed over at my place again on Wednesday though, and Thursday I stayed at his while Tyler slept at his friend’s. We still hadn’t had a chance to officially ‘celebrate’ yet thanks to the antibiotics making me feel like utter shite, but I slept in his arms until I got too hot, woke up to his face, and it was perfect and beautiful and all I’d ever need for the rest of my life.

  I simply had to make it to the end of the week. That’s what I told myself anyway. Once I’d finished my course of tablets I’d feel better. Little did I know then, that on Saturday I would collapse on stage at Glitter and end up back in A and E for the second time in as many months.

  So, there I was, propped up on a wheeled bed in my hot pants and flowery kimono, my fake long red curls spilling down my back, waiting for the doctor to return. Rhys sat beside me, dressed as himself because he’d been working the bar tonight after two of the regular guys called in sick. Apparently he owed Gary a favour.

  I’d been waiting almost an hour when half a face peered around my curtain. “There you are,” Seb said, pushing the curtain along the rail. “I just walked in on some old guy spewing into a bedpan.”

  I glowered at Rhys, who must’ve called Seb. They were making far too big a deal out of this. I’d been poked and prodded, peed into a jar, and had little wires stuck to my chest. All because I blacked out for half a second.

  Seb walked over to the bed, placing his hand on my shoulder. “What happened?”

  “I just fainted. I’m fine. Really. I didn’t need to come here but he insisted.” I scowled at Rhys once again, who simply raised an unimpressed eyebrow.

  I could tell Seb was about to argue. I saw the challenge in his eyes, but he didn’t get the opportunity to be a smartarse because a doctor arrived, a different, much younger man than the one who came in earlier. This doctor gave me ‘the look’ as he eyed up my outfit, that questioning glance some people have when they see a queen roaming free from their natural habitat. His gaze flicked from my eyes, to my hair, to my lips, like he couldn’t decide if it was appropriate to make eye contact with me.

  “He doesn’t bite, sweetness,” Rhys piped up, and if there hadn’t been witnesses, including a nurse who’d just walked in behind the young doctor, I would’ve leapt off the bed and killed him.

  The doctor cleared his throat and his blatant discomfort along with it, stepping closer to the bed. “I’m Doctor Harris, a student doctor here at The Royal.”

  Ah, that explains it. With a little more life and work experience under his belt, I imagined he’d soon learn to steel his reaction when it came to dealing with the more…unique patients life had to offer.

  “I’ve come to talk you through your results and discharge. Is that okay with you?” he continued.

  I offered my flawlessly manicured hand into the air. “Sure.”

  “Your ECG readings are within normal range, and your breath sounds are good so I think your chest infection is under control. Your urine sample shows that you’re quite dehydrated, which I, and Doctor Ranj who you saw earlier, believe is the reason you fainted. Your body’s been working extra hard to fight off a nasty infection. It’s important to keep it hydrated and help it do its job.”

  I didn’t need to look at Seb to know he’d be giving me a ‘telling off’ stare for not taking care of myself. In my defence, I thought I’d been drinking just fine.

  “Drink more, at least two litres of fluids a day,” the doctor added. “And rest for a day or so. Any more problems, see your GP.”

  “Got it. Thanks.” In all honesty, I felt like a bit of a dick. People came here with life-threatening injuries and I’d been here twice now through being a careless wanker. They must have had my name on some kind of timewasters list, surely.

  When the doctor left, I swung my legs off the bed, my heels clicking against the floor as I jumped down.

  “Why don’t we go pick up Ty and you both stay at mine tonight?” Seb suggested, snaking his arm around my waist and helping me along like I was a frigging invalid. “I’m betting that godawful mattress isn’t helping you get the rest you need.”

  “I sleep just fine on my mattress.” After eight years together, I was used to it. “But we’re outta milk, so deal.”

  “Ah, damn, you two,” Rhys cut in, trailing behind us as we followed the yellow line on the floor which guided us towards the hospital exit. “You’re too effin’ cute together. You make this old girl’s heart pine.”

  “Yeah?” My steps slowed until Rhys was by my side. “Thought you were getting a cat.”

  “I was. Then I remembered the pain and sufferin’ I went through when my hamster died and decided against it.”

  “When did you have a hamster?” I’d known Rhys for eleven years and not once had he mentioned a hamster.

  “When I was six.” He pressed a hand to his chest. “My Bumble. I legit cried nonstop for three months.”

  Arm still around my waist, I felt Seb’s body shake with silent laughter. We broke apart when we reached his car and, as I opened the passenger door, I spoke to him over the roof. “Can we give Rhys a lift on the way?”

  “He can’t say no,” Rhys butted in, already opening the back door.

  Seb snorted in disbelief. “Is that so?”

  “You’ve had sex in my flat. I bet there’re dead swimmers containing your DNA dotted around the whole place. The least you can do is give me a lift.”

  “Jesus, Rhys.” Chuckling, I shook my head and slipped into the passenger seat.

  Seb and Rhys followed, and as Seb fixed his seatbelt, he glanced at my inappropriate best friend in the mirror. “You really should clean more.”

  And on that note, the engine juddered and the stereo came on, connecting automatically to Seb’s iPhone. I was used to his eclectic taste in music now. I’d even grown to like some of the old songs he sang along to, in fact. Seb was the only person I knew whose musical tastes spanned literally every decade since the sixties, and he had songs from The Searchers, Abba, Spandau Ballet, Backstreet Boys, and, unfortunately, even One Direction on a single playlist. When Nights in White Satin by The Moody Blues started playing, however, I knew Rhys would have an opinion.

  And I was right.

  “Bleedin’ ‘ell, Grandad. You got anythin’ less depressin’?
”

  Smirking, Seb tapped a button on his steering wheel until he landed on another track. Jesus He Knows Me by Genesis.

  “Oh, Christ,” Rhys grumbled. “Olli, I think you’ve made a huge mistake.”

  With a glorious grin on his face, Seb cranked up the volume, drowning out the sound of Rhys’ protests, and began belting out the lyrics as he edged the car out of the parking space.

  Thankfully, as much as I loved these two men, we were in for a relatively short journey.

  * * *

  “Mmm…” The sound trickled from my throat before I’d fully woken up the next morning, my hips automatically pushing my cock deeper into the fist that encased it, despite my eyes being closed. “Morning.”

  With a lazy smile, my eyes flickered open to meet Seb’s stare. He lay on his side, propped up on his elbow, studying my face as his hand stroked leisurely up and down my dick. “Morning.”

  Hovering his face above mine, he leaned down to kiss me and I rolled my head to the side. “I’ve not brushed my teeth,” I protested, smiling as he carried on trying to kiss me anyway.

  “I don’t care,” he whispered, kissing along the stubble that coated my jaw. “I’ve been awake for ages, had a shower, all the while thinking about sitting on that delicious dick of yours.”

  Oh, God… “Hold on.” Rolling onto my side, I fumbled around in the drawer of the bedside table until I found the leftover tube of throat lozenges I’d left here. Blackcurrant and menthol had to taste better than morning breath. Popping one in my mouth, I swirled it around with my tongue and smiled.

  “Good to go?” he asked.

  “Ye-yeah…oh shit, yeah,” I groaned as he massaged my cock, flexing his wrist. Burying my face in his neck, I bit my bottom lip to stop myself moaning too loudly, aware that the boys were sleeping in the next room. But fuck, I wanted to scream his name so badly.

  Morning sex with Seb was magnificent. My cock felt harder, my senses heightened. It was sweet and lazy and beautiful, and we hadn’t done it nearly enough lately thanks to my body being a twat and getting ill. Taking my face in his hands, he leaned down and traced the seam of my lips with his tongue, licking slowly before slipping inside.

  “Mmm,” he whispered. “They taste nice.”

  I’d agree, except the flavour did nothing but remind me of my sore throat and how painful it had been. Breaking our kiss far too soon, he hitched a leg over my hips, straddling me, before crawling up the mattress until his cock hovered above my face. I stared up at his body towering over me, raising an eyebrow at the wicked smirk he wore. I ran a flattened palm over his stomach, rubbing over the patch of dark hair, and smiled when he gripped the base of his cock, pushing it towards my lips.

  “You know you want to taste it,” he teased, running the tip over my bottom lip.

  “Oh I do, do I?” It smelled like the almond shower gel from his bathroom, and I absolutely did want to taste it.

  Sticking out my tongue, I flicked his swollen tip…just once, making him throw his head back and suck in a hiss.

  “Don’t tease me, Oliver,” he urged, nudging at my mouth.

  Wrapping my fingers around the base of his thick shaft, I moistened my lips and kissed the head before enveloping it completely, filling my mouth. “Mmm,” I moaned against his hard flesh, raising my head to slide him all the way to the back of my throat.

  “Oh, God…Whatever’s in that lozenge is doing delicious things to me right now.”

  As I sucked him in and out of my mouth, I followed the trail of my lips with my hand, gripping and twisting, working him faster and faster until I felt a burst of salty pre-cum erupt on my taste buds.

  Delicious.

  “Holy fuck…” His breaths came in short pants and his hips started rocking in time with my mouth. He was close, I could feel it, taste it…and then he pulled away, making me sag in disappointment.

  “Let me finish,” I encouraged, pulling on his hips.

  Shaking his head, he grinned down at me while reaching out to the drawer next to the bed, his hand returning with a condom and a bottle of lube. “No. I want to feel you inside me when I come.”

  God, I needed him, needed to sate the ache in my cock, the throb in my balls. I needed to close the gap between us, despite him already sitting right on top of me. I needed to be a part of him, and him of me, and I needed him now.

  He shimmied down the mattress, opening the condom as he did, before rolling it over my bordering-on-painful erection. My hips moved instinctively at his touch, itching to rock into him. “Y-you’re not ready,” I muttered, practically whimpered. “Let me play with you.”

  Again, he simply smiled…and then he pumped a couple of squirts of lube onto his fingers, snuck his hand between his thighs, reached under his balls and sought out his hole.

  “Holy shit…” I hadn’t meant to say it aloud, but damn if watching him slip his own fingers inside himself wasn’t the hottest thing I’d ever seen in my life.

  His eyelids closed a little, the pleasure forcing his brow to knit, but he never took his gaze off mine as he flexed his wrist, plunging his fingers in and out of his hole over and over again. “Ah, yeah,” he moaned, taking what he needed from himself while I just sat back and watched.

  The sight alone was almost enough to make me come. I had no choice but to reach down and stroke my cock in an effort to relieve the building pressure. Fuck, I couldn’t watch him much longer. I felt my balls begin to tighten with each gentle tug. “Dammit, Seb. I need to fuck you.”

  With his free hand, he drizzled some lube straight onto my cock before closing his palm over mine, taking over from me and massaging the silky smoothness into the condom. “Oh…” Please… I couldn’t get the word past my lips as I bucked my hips, forcing my dick deeper into his tight grip.

  And then his hand disappeared.

  Kneeling higher, he crawled over me a little further until his arse was positioned exactly where I needed him. Reaching behind himself, he took hold of my cock, guiding it towards his perfectly tight, warm hole, and then slowly – gloriously, torturously, slowly, he lowered himself onto it with a guttural sigh. “Fuck yes,” he breathed through gritted teeth. “You feel so fucking good.”

  Hands on my shoulders, he continued to move up and down, slow and gentle at first, before building up to harsh, greedy slams, sucking me impossibly deep into his body.

  “Oh…sh-shit…” I started to cry out, as quietly as I could, arching my back to thrust myself as far into him as possible. Reaching out, I took his cock in my hand, my palm flush with the underside of his shaft before clasping my fingers closed around it, and I started to tug.

  “Fuck, Olli…Fuck that’s it.”

  His body folded, his hand gripping the back of my neck as he pulled me into a heated kiss. It wasn’t gentle or sweet. It was breathless. Passionate. Hungry. His chest trapped my arm between us but I had enough room to keep working his cock, keep stroking him up and down – rough then smooth, hard then soft, until he couldn’t take it anymore. “I’m gonna come, Oliver. I’m gonna come so damn hard.” His voice was practically a growl against my neck as he plunged down onto my cock again and again.

  “Me t-” Jets of hot cum spurting over my fingers interrupted me and as I rubbed the silkiness into the head of Seb’s cock, I felt my own release shooting down my spine, drawing my balls up into my body. “Oh God, me too.” Knowing exactly how to take care of me, he pitched his hips even faster, his arse cheeks slapping down onto my thighs. “Fuck…Seb!”

  Tipping my head back, my whole body shuddered as my cock pulsed inside him...and then my muscles relaxed with a long, sated sigh.

  “Mmm,” he moaned, licking along my collarbone. “You liked that, huh?”

  Breathless, I kissed the top of his head. “Crap, I wasn’t noisy was I?”

  Seb chuckled, gripping the base of my cock while he hitched himself off me. I missed him already. “Those kids would sleep through a warzone. I wouldn’t worry about it.”

  Sh
it.

  “I’m glad you’re feeling better,” he added, running his fingers through my hair. “I’ve missed you. In-love sex is intense don’t ya think?” he said, winking.

  Shifting onto my side, I started to smile…and then I winced.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” I answered quickly. My back was sore. I must’ve landed hard when I went down on stage.

  “There is. Let me see,” he insisted, leaning over me to take a look. “Jesus. That’s a whopper.”

  “Bruised?” I asked, even though I knew the answer from the way his face screwed up like he could feel the pain himself.

  “It’s like an artist’s canvas back there. I’ll run you a bath and then I’ll get you an ice pack. I read about this cream once too. Arsenic cream or something like that. I’ll go get you some from that hippy dippy health food place in town.”

  “Arsenic cream, eh?” I started to laugh. “You had enough of me already?”

  He drew his eyebrows together, confused. “Arsenic…Arsenal…Arse-something.” He shrugged.

  “Arnica. And you really don’t need to. It doesn’t hurt that bad. But thank you for looking out for me.”

  “Hey, I’m looking out for myself. I want you in top shape so you can provide me with more of that hot sex,” he said, his smile teasing as he started nibbling along my jaw.

  Really, I didn’t do much except lie back and let him ride the ever-loving fuck out of me, but I wasn’t about to fight over credit. “In that case, I won’t argue.”

  “Good man.” He kissed my nose before jumping out of bed. “I’ll shout you when the bath’s ready.”

  “Seb?” I called when he reached the door, making him turn around. “I love you.”

  Curling one side of his mouth up into a smile, he winked again. “I’m rather fond of you, too.”