Dark Matter: SCIENCE FICTION ROMANCE

by Jessica Loft

  “Kate, Kate, stop.” He pulled her closer so that her face was in his shoulder. “Just stop.”

  He let her cry for another few minutes. Then, he eased her over to the couch and sat her down. He went to her kitchen, poured her some water, and brought it to her. He knelt down in front of her and handed her the glass of water and a fresh tissue.

  She dabbed her eyes and drank half the glass before she looked at him. His eyes were so soft and hopeful, it made her heart leap.

  He smiled at her and kissed her hand. “You’re pregnant.”

  She nodded. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I—”

  He held a finger to her lips. “My turn to talk. I do wish you would have told me sooner. I wouldn’t have… well, I would have been gentler with you and wouldn’t have taken you to the bar in the first place. But, you said you love me. Do you realize you said that?”

  She nodded and dabbed her eyes again.

  “Did you mean it? Do you really?”

  “I guess I might just be hormonal, which is probably why I can’t stop crying, but yes. I love you.”

  He closed his eyes and a slow grin took over his face. “You don’t know what that does to me. Being with you makes me so happy, Katelyn. I’ve only said I love you to one person, but I think I love you, too. I want to help you raise this baby. I want to make a family with you.”

  She shook her head and the tears came faster. She wanted that so badly, but not with someone so violent.

  “Stop. Before you write me off, just listen. When my wife and son were alive, I was different. I didn’t go to bars except rarely to hang with my boys. I didn’t get into fights hardly ever, I didn’t take chances or do half the crazy stuff I do now. I worked and I provided for them and when they died, it killed me. And I still feel dead inside most of the time. Driving fast on my bike, getting drunk and fighting. Those things make me feel again, and that’s why I do them. The pain was too much and it made me numb. Having my bike club, though, it gave me something to do. It made me feel. But then you came and I started to feel for real. It’s been so long, it kinda scared me. And that’s why I can’t lose you now. I can’t lose this feeling, and I can’t lose someone else I love.” He paused then and his breath caught. “If I lose you, I’d be losing another relationship and another child.”

  They stared at each other with tears in their eyes.

  “Please,” he whispered. “Let me take care of you, let me protect you and your baby. Let me be your family.”

  “Xavier…” She had to look away from him. It all felt too good to be true. How she wanted to say yes and let him. “We’ve only been together a month. It’s too soon to know if we’re right together, and I just can’t take that chance.”

  “Katelyn.” He let his head fall until his forehead rested on her knee. “Let me try, at least. Let me prove to you that I can be what you want. Move in with me. Come live in my house and get rid of this apartment. It’s not big enough for a baby anyway. You said you’re three months? So that gives you six whole months to see that I can be the father your child needs.”

  “But why would you want to do that? It’s not even your baby.”

  “I know that, and it doesn’t matter. It’s your baby, and if you’re mine, it’s mine, too. I haven’t heard you talk about the real father, anyway, so I’m guessing he’s not in the picture?”

  “I haven’t told him.” She looked down, ashamed at herself. “He won’t answer my calls or return my texts, so I figured, oh well, I tried.”

  “So, you have no excuse, then. It’s not like you’re trying to make something happen with him, which would be understandable. But, he’s gone and I’m here, and I want you and your baby. And I… I love you, too, Katelyn.”

  “Are you sure? Are you really sure about all of this? I mean, you’re still probably half drunk.”

  He chuckled. “Nothing sobers you up faster than watching someone you love walk out the door.”

  “But how can you love me, though? I’ve been lying to you and you haven’t known me that long.”

  “It wasn’t like I told you about my family right away, either. These are things you just don’t tell people immediately. But, just because we haven’t known each other long, doesn’t mean it’s not real, and just because it’s new doesn’t mean it won’t last.”

  “But—”

  “Don’t you think you owe your child at least a try? What if this is his or her only chance to have a solid family? A father who cares and is around and works hard. And loves his or her mother.”

  She shook her head hard. “That’s too much to ask of you.”

  “No. It’s not. You’d be giving me everything I want in life. How is that too much? To make my dreams come true?”

  “You’re really, really sure?”

  “Yes. Please. Katelyn, move in with me. Let me take care of you and the baby. Be my family.”

  She looked at him for a long time, then, with a deep sigh, she said, “Okay.”

  “Okay?”

  She nodded, and broke into a smile, laughing and wiping her tears. “I will.”

  He grabbed her into a tight hug and pulled her off the couch into his arms. “We’re going to have a baby,” he whispered. “I can’t wait.”

  Chapter 6

  Katelyn set down the paint brush and stepped back to look at her work. It was done and had come out even better than she planned. She heard the front door close and got to her feet, struggling under the weight of her round stomach.

  “X, come up here!”

  She heard his feet on the stairs and stepped into the hall, pulling the door shut behind her and beaming.

  “I have a surprise for you,” she said.

  “Well, I have a surprise for you, too.” He grinned and kissed her.

  “Me first.” She brushed a loose hair from her forehead. “Close your eyes.” She opened the door and led him inside, positioned him in front of the mural, and said, “Okay. Open them.”

  He opened his eyes and looked at the wall. Most of the room was light blue. X had painted it when they found out the baby was a boy. But she’d painted this one wall in darker shades, then added in small white dots for stars.

  He gasped. “You painted Orion.”

  “I thought it’d be nice to have your favorite constellation in the baby room.”

  “I love it. It’s perfect.” He stared at it for a long while, then turned to her. “My turn now?”

  “Oh, sure. Should I close my eyes?”

  He laughed. “If you want to.”

  She closed her eyes and bounced on her feet. He’d been in the habit lately of stopping to get things for the baby and coming home to surprise her. The baby already had his own leather jacket and a onesie that said, “My daddy can kick your daddy’s butt.” He had a toy motorcycle and a soft blue teddy bear.

  She held out her hands, expecting him to place something in them. Instead, he took her hand in his and kissed it.

  “Open your eyes.”

  She opened them to see Xavier on his knee in front of her, holding out a sparkling ring.

  She gasped and stepped back. “What! Oh, my goodness, Xavier.”

  He grinned at her. “You don’t want to have this baby out of wedlock, do you?”

  She laughed and wiped away a tear.

  “Katelyn, these last seven months with you have been the most amazing of my life. I love you. I cannot wait to have our little boy and complete our family. But, I want to do it right, as your husband. Will you marry me?”

  “Yes!” She almost knocked him over throwing her arms around his neck.

  He fell back, pulling her to the floor with him. They laughed and he leaned on one elbow to look at her. Then, he took her hand and slipped the ring on.

  But now that they were horizontal and he was beside her, the mood changed. He slid on top of her, holding himself above her round belly. He kissed her and she leaned up to kiss him harder. She yanked his shirt off and he gave her a sly smile.

 
; “Guess you missed me today?” he asked.

  “Shhh. No talking, just kissing.” She pressed her mouth to his again and ran her fingers along his back.

  He broke the kiss long enough to make his way down her body, stopping, as he always did, to kiss and massage her stomach gently. Then, he pulled her pants down and all the gentleness was gone. He spread her legs and worked his tongue in and out and around her, sending her into a fit of pleasure. Her hormones had been so strong lately, and she could not get enough of him.

  After a minute, she said, “Stop. I need you inside me now.”

  He chuckled and took off his pants. Then, he slid her onto his lap, pressing deep into her. She moaned loudly and rocked her hips against him. He reached up behind her and tugged at her hair, biting her neck and earlobe.

  He slid his hand between their bodies so he could rub his thumb around her clit. The rush of bliss overwhelmed her and she pulled him close as she cried out.

  “God, you are so good at that,” she said, breathing hard.

  He murmured into her ear. “So are you. I can’t wait to make the next baby.”

  She chuckled. “Let’s get this one born first.”

  He put his hands on her stomach and caressed it. “Come out little baby,” he said in a soft, soothing tone.

  “We need to settle on a name. I thought of a new one today. What about Logan Xavier?”

  “I like it. But only if we can call him LX for short.”

  “Like little X? I like that.” She rubbed her nose into his neck and looked down at her ring. “It’s so gorgeous,” she said. “It’s like you took a star from the sky and set it in gold.”

  “I would, you know. I’d reach up and make the stars fall for you if you needed them to.”

  She set her head on his shoulder, feeling comforted and secure and knowing without a doubt that he would.

  Now Enjoy The Next Story Below Or Choose One From The Table of Contents

  Rekindle My Navy SEAL

  Chapter 1

  Dylan looked up from his armchair and stared blankly out the window. The sky was bright blue, but he knew the clouds were there. The gray sky was just waiting to seep in and make the day dreary again. He had no reason to hope things would be better today. Every time he was tempted to think it was going to be a good day, something else went wrong to keep him miserable.

  He looked down at the letter in his hand. Its edges and creases were worn and frayed from too much folding and unfolding. The writing, done in ballpoint ink, was smeared in places and starting to fade in others. After a year, it was holding up pretty well for as many times as he’d read it. But maybe he should have copied it or had it laminated once he got back to the states.

  He looked toward the end of the letter, the part that hurt the worst. “I just don’t think I can marry you and live this sort of life. I don’t think I can handle this military life with you always being gone and constantly worrying about something happening to you. I don’t eat or sleep right when you’re gone and I can’t live like this forever. I’m sorry.”

  She’d enclosed the ring he’d given her months earlier, just before he left on his most recent deployment. He’d come home to find all of her things gone from their rented house. The house was empty and it made him feel hollow inside, and with the trauma he’d also faced overseas, it was too much for him.

  Someone knocked on his door and he considered not answering it. They’d leave eventually. But then the thought came—the one that always came—of Cassandra. What if she’d realized she’d made a mistake and was here to see him?

  He got up from his chair in the living room and trudged to the front door. When he opened it, it was not Cass, but Cameron, his best friend.

  “Hey man!” Cameron clapped him on the shoulder and walked past him into the house, not waiting to be invited in.

  “Hey,” Dylan said and closed the door.

  “How’s it going?” Cameron asked. He perched on the edge of the couch in the living room and picked up Cass’s letter.

  “Okay.” Dylan gently took the letter from him and folded it up, shoving it back in his pocket.

  Cameron stared at him for a long moment. “Dylan. You are not looking good, man.”

  “Thanks. I appreciate your encouragement,” he said flatly.

  “I mean that in the nicest way. You’ve got to get out of the house. Sitting here all day, not working, is the worst thing for you.”

  “I’m not cleared to work, you know that.”

  “Yeah. We gotta get that disability restriction lifted. But until then, why don’t you come to church and volunteer? Grace always needs help folding bulletins. Or you could play with the kids in the nursery. That would be fun.”

  Dylan gave him a blank look. “You want me to come play with a bunch of kids?”

  Cameron pulled his mouth to the side. “Okay, you have a point. But, there’s always some kind of activity going on or some place you can help out.”

  “I’ll think about it.”

  “I knew you’d say that.” Cameron walked across the room into the kitchen and looked in the refrigerator. He took out a carton of milk, unscrewed the lid, and sniffed it. He almost dropped the carton. “Holy hell, man, how old is this milk?” He shook his head and walked back into the living room.

  “Did you just come over to make me feel worse?”

  Cameron slumped onto the couch and looked over at Dylan. “Nope. I came over to ask you to dinner.”

  “You’re not my type.”

  “Perfect. Because it’s a double date and I think Nicole is your type and Grace thinks so, too.”

  “I don’t want to be in a relationship.”

  “Who said anything about that? It’s dinner. Come out and meet someone new and have a nice night with your friends. You haven’t been out with us in months.”

  “Yeah,” Dylan said. “There’s a reason for that.”

  “You’re too sad and all alone in here. Come with us. It’ll be a good time. I’ll even go so far as to pay for your dinner. So come, eat, and then you can come back home and hang out with your Netflix if you want.”

  “Can’t I just skip the dinner part and hang out with Netflix?”

  Cameron dropped his head and gave him a look. “You know Grace will kill me if I don’t go home and tell her you’re coming, right? Help a brother out?”

  Dylan let out a long sigh. “Fine. When?”

  “Tonight. Seven sharp.”

  “I am dying of excitement,” Dylan said flatly.

  Cameron came over to him and gripped his shoulder. “I know it’s been hard. We’re worried about you. We just want to see you be okay again.”

  “I know.”

  “Good. Tonight!” Cameron walked to the front door, calling back to him, “Don’t be late!”

  Chapter 2

  Dylan started getting ready early, so he could move slow and take his time. He was not in favor of rushing things these days. He took a shower and even shaved his face for the first time in weeks. He pulled on some pants from his drawer, but when he looked in his closet for a shirt, he was faced with too many memories.

  The first shirt he saw was the mint green one he’d worn on their first date. Then there was the red and blue striped one that Cass had bought for him for Christmas. The one behind it, the light blue, was the one he wore when he’d proposed. When she’d been so happy to be marrying him.

  Things had seemed perfect that day. He’d brought her to her favorite restaurant for dinner, then to their favorite dessert location. After peanut butter pie, they’d gone for a long walk, and just as they reached the small pond, he’d knelt down in a beam of moonlight and given her the ring. It was beautiful. He couldn’t have planned it better. She had been so surprised and had said yes, happily, and jumped into his arms. They spent the next hours dreamily smiling while discussing wedding plans and tossing food to the ducks in the pond.

  A month later, he was sent overseas on deployment. She’d known that being a Navy SEAL was a
n important part of his life. Fighting for his country like that made him feel like a man. But a few months later, after too many distant conversations and Skype calls cut short, he’d started to feel like they were drifting apart.

  He’d watched other guys in his unit. They either drifted apart from their wives and girlfriends during their time away, or they seemed to grow even closer. The ones who wrote letters and fought for the phone and computer, those who seemed to receive more letters and packages, were the ones who seemed to make it. But then there were a few guys like him. He’d gotten only two letters in his time there. No packages. When he tried to call her, she either didn’t answer, or couldn’t talk long. Then the letter had come. The last one, with her ring inside.

  He’d read it in disbelief. How could she do this to him and do it while he was there, so far away? He’d tried to call her that night, but she didn’t answer. And hours later, after he read the letter again for the tenth time that day, there was an explosion.

  It had been just feet from where he stood. He’d been lucky. He was still around the corner of the building and most of the blast was absorbed by the bricks falling around him. But it had been terrifying, terrifying enough that he reconsidered his decision to be a Navy SEAL for life.

  Combined with the trauma of losing Cass and being in the explosion, two months later, the SEAL’s doctor reported to his superiors that he was suffering from PTSD and immediately started the release forms to send him home. He fought it, of course. The last thing he wanted to do was go home to an empty house where he’d lived with Cass. He had managed to stay a few more months while his papers were being processed, but when his performance started to slip, they sent him home on disability. Which was where he was stuck now. Not able to work. Forced to sit home all day with his memories and his weekly therapist appointments.