The Smartest Girl in the Room

by Deborah Nam-Krane

  Richard clicked his tongue. "It wasn’t that simple. I’d befriended him already, and then he was on the Solar Car Team, sort of. I honestly didn’t know if Sophie was telling the truth or if her depression had twisted everything for her." He looked away, like he was remembering something else. "I stayed friends with him because I wanted to be sure. Jessie started repeating some of your conversations about him, and I was starting to hear some familiar things. You’re lucky. Sophie lost a lot of her friends once she was with Drew."

  Emily couldn’t take it all in. "He isn’t the Vice President of the Solar Car Team," she blurted out. "Or the President." She remembered now he had said both.

  "Hardly. He was never more than a hanger-on."

  She knew that. "Tell me about co-op."

  "Co-op? I don’t think he’s even enrolled at the school anymore. I think he ran out of money, and he’s been working ever since."

  "Working? Didn’t you get him a job?"

  "No, just the apartment."

  Emily blinked. "The apartment?"

  "Yes," Richard said slowly. "I got him the apartment when he told me he was having money problems. He’s house-sitting for someone. They’re not coming back for another three months. I’m not sure how he was going to get something else, or-"

  "Oh my God, I am such a clueless idiot." She remembered their conversation on the quad. She'd thought she was so clever. But Drew had been playing along, playing her, letting her play herself. "He’s not having money problems. He wants to eat out all the time. He wants to buy me clothes, food- anything."

  "I don’t know where he’s getting the money."

  Emily thought about his old roommates and the noises in the apartment the day she moved in. "He was living on campus before? In a dorm?"

  "Yes, I went to his dorm a few times."

  "Drug dealers?"

  "I don’t know, but that’s what Drew told me. I don’t know what I can believe."

  "Why didn’t you tell me any of this?"

  "I didn’t realize until that night after dinner how much you didn’t know. I’m sorry."

  She couldn’t look at him, she was so angry, mostly at herself.

  "He didn’t rape her."

  Emily sat upright. "What are you talking about?"

  "Michael didn’t rape Jessie," he said with some difficulty. "I walked in before he could."

  "Oh, Richard..."

  "I’m not saying that makes things any better." He closed his eyes. "She was drunk, Em. I thought he was going to watch her, I didn’t think... He’s known her since she was a baby. But then... I didn’t see either of them, and I knew. She didn’t remember anything, so maybe she thinks more happened. I can’t blame her if she hates me. I know she does hate me for not kicking him out of my life. But for what it’s worth, I hit him that night. I love him like a brother, but I’ll kill him if he touches her again. I know-"

  "Stop. It’s okay," Emily said. Richard looked at her, and after a moment smiled. It felt like a thank you.

  "What do we do about Drew?" he said at last.

  "Do you have a camera?"

  The two of them walked to the apartment. "The fireplace," she said. The brick that had looked funny was dirtier than the rest.

  He walked over with her and they both bent down on their knees. Richard aimed a flashlight he had brought from his car up the shaft.

  There it was. A plastic box filled with bottles and a ledger. Emily reached up to grab it, but Richard stopped her. He got two washcloths from the bathroom and wrapped his hands before he pulled it down. "Don’t touch anything." He took out his cell phone and took pictures from all angles. Then he opened the top. They could see the names of some of the vials- Oxycodone, Percaset, Rohypnol, and a bunch of other names she had never heard of before.

  He closed the box. "I’m taking this away, and then we’re leaving. Get packed now, alright?"

  Emily headed to the bedroom as Richard walked out the door. She threw all of her clothes, books and toiletries into her suitcase and backpack.

  The rattling that first morning, the ledger in the drawer. Stupid.

  She had just brought her bags into the living room when Drew opened the front door.

  She stood in front of the fireplace. "Hi honey. How was work?"

  He lunged for the fireplace. He frantically patted his hands inside of it. "What did you do, you stupid little idiot?"

  "Where should I start? I met Sophie. I found out about your job. I found out about the apartment. I found out you haven’t told me the truth about anything. And I took your drugs."

  He shook her by the shoulders. Her head just barely missed hitting the wall. "Get off of me!" she screamed, digging her nails into his arms. The smell of his sweat, which had bothered her before, now disgusted her.

  "I’ll kill you, you little bitch!"

  The next thing she heard was Richard kicking in the door. He pushed Drew away and pulled Emily to him.

  "Do you have any idea what you’ve done?" Drew cried. "I’m dead now!"

  "Then you’d better leave," Richard said calmly. "I’m giving you two days. If you aren’t out of here by Wednesday, I’m going to the police. Think about it." Never taking his eyes off of Drew, Richard picked up Emily’s bags and led her out.

  Emily didn’t believe the sharp air, didn’t believe the car was running, didn’t believe they were driving. Richard put his hand on her head. "I think I should take you to the hospital."

  "No," she shook her head slowly. "No hospital."

  "You might have a concussion."

  "My head. I didn’t hit my head."

  "But he was shaking you like a rag doll. I ought to send him to jail just for that."

  "I don’t care," she said, ready to be sick. "He’s gone. I’m gone. It’s over."

  "Where do you want me to take you?"

  "What did you do with them?"

  "I put them in one of the safest places in Boston. No one will find them unless I take them there."

  Emily nodded. "Take me to Zainab’s."

  He stopped in front of Zainab's apartment ten minutes later and helped her with her bags.

  Richard touched her face. "Are you going to be okay here? Because if you’re not, you can come home with me and I’ll call a doctor and get a nurse and have someone look after you until you are."

  Emily blinked back her tears. "I’m gonna be okay."

  He pulled her into a hug, and Emily wanted to melt into his chest. "I’m calling you tomorrow and checking up on you. Don’t say no, because Jessie will never forgive me."

  "Jessie…You can’t tell her about this right now, alright? She’ll do something stupid." A tear streamed down her face. He wiped it away.

  "Whatever you want, my dear."

  "Phone call is good."

  Emily wiped away the rest of her tears as Richard drove away. She buzzed Zainab’s door. She had to buzz three times before Zainab buzzed back. Emily made it up the stairs. She knocked on the door. After a moment, Zainab opened it.

  "You’re here," Zainab said. She moved out of the way as Emily brought her bags in.

  "Go ahead, Z." She was so tired. "You told me so, and I’m an idiot because I didn’t listen. The only consolation is that it was so much worse than you could have thought."

  Zainab sat down. "You’re not an idiot."

  "Well, now you’ve got a roommate, and maybe someday I’ll even be able to pay you rent." Emily laughed, but Zainab didn’t move. Emily held her breath. "Zainab, if you don’t want me to stay anymore, it’s fine-"

  "No." Zainab looked up at Emily. She was crying. "Please stay."

  Emily wouldn’t have known who Drew was if she saw him. She knelt down next to Zainab. "Honey, what’s wrong?"

  Zainab shook her head. "I’m the one who’s stupid."

  The hair on the back of Emily’s neck stood up. "What happened?"

  "I was talking to everyone, and Joe got me a drink. And that’s the last thing I remember before..." Her lip trembled. "I woke up. I
was bleeding. There was a used condom on the floor. It hurt to move. I didn’t know where I was. I... I put my clothes back on and went outside. Someone said Joe had left a while ago, and it was three in the morning. There weren’t any buses or trains, so I had to walk home. It was cold."

  Zainab sobbed. "He put something in my drink. I know. My head hurt all yesterday and today. I couldn’t leave the house. I didn’t want to leave." Emily put her hand on Zainab’s back, and Zainab cried harder. "I took a shower. I know I shouldn’t have, but I had to. I couldn’t be dirty like that. And the drugs are out of my system now. It’s all gone. I was so stupid. But no one would have believed me anyway, because everyone knows I’ve had a crush on him for so long. You believe me, Em, don’t you?"

  "Zainab..." Emily never had to think so fast in her life. She would not say anything to make this worse. "Of course I do. I’ll leave with you, I’ll take you-"

  "No!" Zainab shrieked between her sobs. "I can’t tell the police! They won’t believe me!" Emily wanted to say that of course they would, but as Zainab’s face contorted with tears, she knew there was no way she’d convince her of that.

  She held Zainab and willed herself not to cry. She thought for a moment about the handshake between Joe and Drew and then thought for a second that she was wrong. But she knew she wasn’t wrong.

  She had to do something. "Everything is going to be okay," she heard herself say. "I promise you. But you have to lie down now, alright? You need to sleep."

  Zainab sniffled and wiped her nose. "I don’t want to sleep."

  "You have to rest. I’ve got to go out to get something, but then I’m coming right back. You have to trust me. But you need to rest."

  Zainab let Emily put her into bed. Emily didn’t leave until she was sure that Zainab was asleep. She got on the train and waited.

  CHAPTER 44

  She got to the university and marched into the SGC offices. "Is Joe here?" she asked one of the girls. "I need to talk to him about the canvassing."

  "Yeah, he’s in the back office," the girl said as she neatly stacked Joe's flyers.

  She walked into the back office. Joe was on the phone, his back turned. "Hey, Joe." He held up a finger, not looking to see who it was. After a minute, he hung up and turned around.

  Emily didn’t realize what she was doing until her fist made contact with his jaw. He nearly fell off the chair. "What the Hell?" he shouted, spitting out blood.

  Emily leaned over him, balancing herself on the desk. "Ask me why, motherfucker. I’ll tell you." She heard people pile into the doorway. "I’ll tell them too."

  "I think someone should call campus police," one of the younger girls said in a frightened voice.

  "That’s a great idea," Emily whispered. "Because I’ll tell them too."

  "Guys, it’s fine," Joe said quickly, waving them off. "Just a little disagreement." They waited a moment, but then most of them left. Emily stared down the two who remained until they were gone. She heard someone on the phone.

  "You can’t prove anything," he hissed as soon as they were alone.

  "You don’t think so? Then call the police." She leaned in again. "Call the papers, the students groups. Maybe you’ll get the sympathy vote because someone sucker punched you. Except that could go really badly for you. Because sometimes you don’t have to prove something, you just have to make enough people think it might be true. That’s, what, like criminal law versus civil law? Maybe you won’t get your punk ass thrown in jail, but you’ll never be President of anything."

  "You can’t prove anything, and I’ll sue you for libel!"

  "Oh my God, you are stupid. That’s if I put it in print. And I won’t. I’ll just make sure someone uses those words. And no matter what it’s called, I’ve got enough proof to bury you in Hell."

  "Yeah? You think?" Joe wiped the blood off his mouth. "Because I’ve got about a hundred people who can tell you that Zainab drank like a fish any time she was at a party, and another hundred who will tell you she’s all over me. That’s why Zainab hasn't done anything."

  She had always known he was a reptile. "Yep, you called it. Zainab drinks, and she was so into you. You could have had her months ago. But you needed to do it with a little insurance, didn’t you? Why is that?" He didn’t say anything. "You are one sick little monkey, aren’t you?"

  "Zainab isn’t going to do anything." Joe stood up. "You’ve got nothing."

  "Are you really such an idiot? God, how did you get this far? I know about the drugs, asshole. I’ve got your dealer."

  "What dealer?" His smile was so smug; she wanted to slap it off.

  "You’re not cute. Remember when you got them? I was there. It was the day you weren’t picking up flyers." Joe’s eyes darted back and forth, and then they stopped wide eyed.

  "That could have been anything."

  "Remember the name of the guy you bought them from? Drew. Drew Strand. Maybe he inherited you from your old dealers, maybe you just asked around. It doesn’t matter. I know who it was."

  "So what?" His face was next to hers. There was nothing charming about him up close. "I am nothing compared to the rest of his clients. I don’t think he’ll even remember me, and I didn’t pay with a credit card."

  Emily pushed him away, ready to hit him again. "You don’t get it. I’ve got the dealer. I’ve got his drugs. And you’re probably right. There must have been bigger buyers, because you should see his stash. He could go to jail until he’s forty with what I’ve got. But I only have eyes for you. I will make everything else go away if he gives you to me. And if you’re going to say that still might not be enough to send you away, you’re probably right again. But it would be enough to ruin you for a while." She moved closer. "How long do you think it will take me?"

  He sat on the desk, looking down at the floor. He looked back up. "What do you want?"

  "I want you to go away. I don’t ever want to see your face again. In fact, I don’t think I ever want to hear your name again."

  He laughed. "Do you know how hard I’ve worked? Do you think I’m going to let you take all that away?"

  "I know how hard Zainab worked. That’s why it’s so perfect. I mean it. I so much as read your name in a newspaper twenty years from now for a traffic violation, and you’re mine. Do you understand me?" Nothing. "Drew Strand. Pill after pill. My friend who had to walk home bleeding. Do you understand?"

  He leapt up. "Yes!" She didn’t move. "Just get out!"

  "Happily, you piece of garbage."

  Everyone was staring at her as she walked to the exit. She wondered how many of them had been at the party. She wondered how many of them knew Zainab. She wondered how they were able to sleep.

  "Emily!"

  She stopped. The green eyes and the perfect smile were standing in the doorway. At Christmas she would have been happy to have seen him, or any time she’d walked by the Reflecting Pool. Or been in the library. Or any time before right now.

  But this was now. "What are you doing here?"

  He was smiling like he had a right to be happy to see her. "Someone called. They said someone hit Joe."

  "You’re such a good friend. What a shame you couldn’t have been there on Saturday."

  "Saturday? Were you there? I’m- I’m sorry, I was moving the last of my things- "

  She felt the blood rush to her feet. "If I had known you weren’t going to go, I would have gone." She took a deep breath to steady herself and stood up as tall as she could. "Leave me alone." She pushed past him and walked to the stairs, but once she was out of sight she had to walk down very slowly for fear that she might fall.

  ~~~

  Mitch was about to follow Emily when one of the younger girls pulled him by his arm. "He’s in there, and that crazy girl is the one who hit him!"

  "What?!?"

  He found Joe cursing while he moved papers onto a chair. There was blood on his mouth and sweater.

  He planted his feet. "What did you do to Emily?"

  "What did I do
to her?" Joe asked incredulously. "That crazy bitch! I didn’t touch her."

  "Don’t call her a bitch."

  "Don’t tell me you’ve got a thing for her! She’s a nut job."

  Mitch knew she wasn’t. "Why did she punch you?"

  "Just leave it."

  Saturday. "What did you do?" He hadn’t gone, and Emily hadn’t either. But Zainab must have. "What did you do to Zainab?"

  "Nothing she hasn’t been begging for!"

  "Did you force yourself on her?"

  "Hey, I didn’t have to. I just gave her something to make it easier to get along. It wouldn’t be a big deal except that little bitch found the guy who gave me the stuff- hey!"

  Mitch pulled Joe up by the collar. "I should kill you for what you did, but that’s going to make sending you to prison harder. If you want to stay in one piece 'til then, shut up." He pushed Joe away from him and ran out and down the stairs, praying he could catch Emily.

  ~~~

  Emily took almost three minutes to get out the front door of the building. She thought she might fall down the stairs to the quad, but she made it. She didn’t know how she’d put one foot in front of the other to get to the train, but she’d make it. She had to get back to Zainab.

  "Emily!" She turned to the side and saw Richard leaving the Kay building. He was with Jordan and Vijay. She meant to wave, but she couldn’t lift her hand.

  Richard ran over to her, turning white. "Did Drew find you? Are you alright?"

  "He raped my friend," she said. Richard caught her before her legs gave out from under her and moved her to a bench.

  "Drew raped your friend?"

  "He sold drugs to someone who did." She started sobbing. "It’s all my fault. I was trying to be smart. I should have told Zainab what I saw. I didn’t know what it was, but I would have if I’d thought about it. I should have gone to the party, but I wanted to talk to you first before I did anything. That was stupid. I should have just left. I should have listened to you and Jessie and Zainab. It’s all my fault."