“Can I have those?” I reach out to take the wipes from his hands. I look up to his face to see if he is going to do this nicely or is the angry banter going to start up as soon as I get on this damn tour bus again. Not that I mind. I’d rather argue with him into a stronger dislike than him be nice to me and make me want to touch him and caress his soft tattooed skin. Which is so damn fine! Jesus, listen to me I am turning into a groupie.
“Why don’t have I have D clean out the drawer? It was his souvenirs that contaminated it.” He says nicely. Oh why don’t you be a dick? That would be so nice right about now.
“I can do it just give me the wipes. Please.”
He shakes his head.
“D.” he calls and gets no response. I turn and see Deacon in deep conversation with Keith and Stacy. Not an angry one either.
“See he’s busy. Just give them to me Johnathan.” I hold out old my hand. How hard does it have to be to get some fucking wipes?
“D! Fucking listen to me man!” he snaps, ignoring me.
“What!?” Deacon yells and turns around. Johnathan walks past me and slaps the wipes into D’s hands.
“You wipe out both of those drawers you used. She—” he peers back at me. “Doesn’t need to be cleaning up pussy juices out of her new drawers. That’s your mess, you clean it up,” he says firmly and moves past the crowded hall and goes into his bedroom and slams the door shut without another word.
Chapter Eighteen
The rest of last night went smoothly. I put away my clothes after D cleaned out my drawers. All my new clothes fit in fine. When we were visiting my parents Stacy and I took some time out and hit up a few vintage shops in Wayfort and The Buckle store in the mall. That’s where I picked up the Lucky jeans and the nerds shirt at a middle of the mall kiosk. I also added a few more rockin’ dresses to my wardrobe, ones that are a little less tight because with my growing belly. I don’t want to show it off right away. We got some more jeans that are low cut so a pregnant belly can fit over them and a few shirts. I got lucky to find some awesome vintage items. Stacy was surprisingly real happy with the purchases overall.
The guys for the rest of the night played video games and ate delivery pizza that James brought in and ate with all of us. James is awesome! Johnathan didn’t leave his room after the Clorox incident and James brought him back some pizza. I don’t like to see Johnathan because it hurts and even more so now that I know I am having his twins. But I feel bad for him.
It’s five in the morning and I just woke up and he’s been locked in his room since last night when we got in. I’m awake because there is a huge mob of fans outside screaming so I can’t sleep. Their concert is tonight but I guess that’s not good enough for them. Do they realize these men are just that? MEN. They don’t have super powers or godlike abilities. They play music. Good music. But this whole crazy fan thing is getting on my nerves.
I slide open my red curtain and hop out of my bunk. To find Stacy sitting awake, typing on his computer on the leather couch.
“Hey you.” He looks up at me with a tired smile.
“Hey, why are you up?” I ask plopping down beside him nuzzling my head onto his shoulder.
“I was just going to ask you the same thing. I got up about an hour ago. Couldn’t sleep my mind is reeling about a few things and those crazy women outside are driving me crazy.”
“Yeah that’s why I woke up too. Guess I better get used to being up at five a.m.” I pat my flat belly.
“Yes you do.” He rests his head on top of mine that’s still resting on his shoulder.
“So what else ya reeling about?”
“I got a few emails that I can’t stop thinking about.”
“And?” I press. I can tell he’s reluctant to talk about it. But I’m also too nosey to back down.
“I got an email from my second ex-wife. Apparently Kyle mailed something to her address thinking I still live there and she just wanted to let me know and tell me she is forwarding it to me here. Not sure how she knows I’m here unless she called the office.”
“Kyle is sending you something? Like what?”
“I have no idea. That’s what worries me. That last time I spoke to him was four years ago. She didn’t say it was a package or a note. I have no idea. If it has his contact info I think I will get a hold of him and apologize like you said. I’ve been thinking about it and I feel horrible how I left things.”
“Good.” I kiss his shoulder. “You’re a great person, Stace.”
The screaming just got louder.
“The women out there have got to stop. If they want these guys to be ready to rock tomorrow night they better,” I say irritated.
The bus door opens and James appears at the top of the steps.
“Hey,” he waves at us, surprised. “I was coming to wake you Stace. The crowd is getting bad. There are about five hundred people out there pushing on that fence and as the dawn hour approaches it’s getting worse. We are either going to have to go to a hotel or call the police to come and offer some back up to tame the crowd. I have a feeling in the next hour they are going to push through and try to get into the bus,” James says. His eyes looking sleepy. I don’t think he slept much tonight.
Stacy stands up “Where’s Jimmy?” he asks James
“He didn’t make it back in yesterday. His flight was canceled. Texas had a huge storm and all planes were grounded. He should be here by tonight though.”
“And I am finding out about this now? Why wasn’t I informed last night?” Stace scolds. He’s in mega work mode. Kicking ass and taking names. He’s superhot in his element. Best friend kind of hot. Not I want to screw his brains out kind. Now that’s gross.
“I’m just finding out myself. I got a call two hours ago when you were sleeping. I didn’t know he wasn’t already in. I figured he was out doing runs. Office calls me and tells me his plane is canceled and now we are stuck with one less man,” James cuts in.
“Okay, you call the local P.D tell them we need four cruisers to hold off the mob. I’ll wake Brian up and tell him to start the bus and we will get out of here in the next hour, two max. I’ll call and book us into a hotel with high security. We have to get this under wraps now. Or it might get ugly.” Stacy barks off orders in his serious voice. I think he might be scared.
“Why is this going on now?” I chime in confused as to why we’ve been on tour for weeks and we never had a major mob problem.
“It happens from time to time. Mainly when we get extra press that wakes the fans. Plus D.C is the only place we are playing two shows at the whole tour and the only place on this coast. We didn’t book New York because I couldn’t get us a decent venue with good security. All the ones I wanted were booked solid on the dates I needed. So we have people traveling to DC from all over the coast. Not sure why it makes them crazier but it’s happened before. Plus we are in a huge city and close to a bunch of other huge cities. So for those fans who didn’t get lucky enough to get tickets within the first five minutes they were posted for sale they come in to try and get a glimpse and prove they are the bands number one fan. It’s sick but it’s how it works when you’re the number one band in the world right now.” Stacy answers.
“All forty thousand tickets were sold in five minutes?” I am amazed.
“Yeah, except like fifty we get to keep for special people or handouts.”
“How much are the tickets for a venue like this?” I ask realizing I am taking up to much of him important time and James already left.
“We have four kinds at this venue. So nosebleed are $175 then next step down are $250. The floor is $375 and the VIP which we only have three hundred cost $525. If you want a backstage pass you have to be a VIP and pay an extra $250 to meet the band and we only offer fifty of those.”
I think my brain just fell out of my head and is rolling across the ground. I can’t believe people actually pay that kind of money to see these guys. That’s nuts. And here I am living in a bus with them, b
reathing the same air, using the same bathroom and shower and sitting on the same couch. How fucking cool is that?
“Sorry I guess I didn’t think people were crazy enough to pay that kind of money. Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Yeah, call a hotel and I need to hire some more bodyguards for the next three days we are here,” he says.
I grab his laptop and call around to three different hotels. The Marriot is the only one in the area to offer us the best accommodations on such short notice with the extra security needed. I book four rooms for three nights, the only rooms they had available. All two bedroom suits. Stacy and I can share one and the guys will have to bunk up.
It’s six thirty by the time I finish up and I’m exhausted. I pad over to the fridge grab a bottle of water and go into my clothes drawer, fish under all my clothes for my prenatal vitamins, open the bottle, pour one out and shoot it back with a big swig of water. They are large, pink and taste like chalk. I am also on a fish oil supplement for brain development but I take that with dinner. I can’t do it in the morning or the fish oil taste makes me nauseous.
Stacy comes up the stairs. He left shortly after giving me the orders to for hotel.
“We’re booked for the Marriot they said they can take us now,” I explain before he has a chance to talk.
“Okay great, Brian’s up and is already to go. The cops have corralled the five hundred person mob outside the fence so I think we’re all set to roll.”
I lounge against the back of the couch. I can’t go back to sleep now. I’m exhausted, getting only four hours of sleep last night. I was up way too late in my cave reading another pregnancy book on my e-reader and switching off to read Lover At Last the latest book by one of my favorite authors. The bus is now rolling and Stacy is in the shower. I don’t know how he does it. I’m certain part of my issue is the fact that I am pregnant and craving coffee so bad. I can’t drink it anymore. I’ve had a cup every day for the past six years and I’ve forced myself to go cold turkey off the stuff. Stuck sipping warm decaf green tea infused with peach. It’s not the same on any level and I find myself crankier in the mornings because I can’t have the one staple, the one constant in my life, coffee. I’m just thankful that no one on this bus drinks it besides me. Most of them are protein shake junkies or milk. I know Johnathan loves chocolate milk. I’ve seen him drink it straight from the jug a hand full of times. It’s kind of sexy to watch. Not that I care or anything.
The bus pulls into the back of the hotel.
“Hey babe, why aren’t you sleeping?” I hear Stacy ask coming out of the bathroom rubbing a towel in his beautiful dirty blonde hair.
“We’re here at the hotel and I couldn’t fall back to sleep if I wanted. Should we wake the men or let them get up on their own? Do you think the mob will find us here?”
“Yes, they probably will. I’m sure there are some here already. Remember, good news travels fast. And yeah, I suppose we should wake the men,” he says tossing the towel in the hamper in the bathroom.
“Do you want me to help? I know they can be a pain sometimes.”
He turns and looks at Johnathan’s closed bedroom door. I instantly get the hint.
“Ok I’ll wake him you get the rest of the guys.” I wave to the bunks.
“You don’t have to babe, I just know the last time I woke him this early he nearly killed me. I’m sure he’d be a little nicer to a woman.”
I nod. “It’s okay.” And get up off the couch in my pj’s and pad my way to Johnathan’s door. I don’t even bother to knock, I just walk right in.
Shit! What is he doing? I find him sprawled out over the bed thrashing his head back and forth sweat pouring down his face, he’s mumbling something obscene under his breath and kicking his legs forcefully at some invisible threat. He’s definitely in some serious nightmare. I didn’t sign up for this. Poor guy! My heart is breaking for him. What do I do? I have to wake him. I’ve never woken anyone from a nightmare except Stacy. His were nothing like that. He just yelled in his sleep there was never any violence or body movements involved.
I walk over to the edge of the bed his body is thrashing and it’s getting worse. I want to cry for him. I climb on the side furthest from him. Crawling over the bed he thrashes and he nearly kicks me. Close call! Too close.
“Johnathan,” I whisper, moving closer to his face. “Johnathan wake up. You’re having a nightmare.” I’m afraid if I touch him I might get hit. If I wasn’t pregnant I probably wouldn’t care but the last thing I need to do is lose these babies because of his nightmares.
“You son of a bitch. Don’t you fucking touch me. No! Why did you do that to her? No. You killed her. No. No. No. I want my mommy. Why? Daddy. Why?” he mumbles through clenched teeth, his head thrashing back and forth on his sweat soaked pillow.
I get in closer pushing my way towards the top of the bed. So his legs can’t reach me.
“Johnathan.” I push his shoulder gently. “Johnathan, you’re having a nightmare. Get up,” I say louder this time. Still nothing.
“Johnathan!” I screech and push his shoulder.
His eyes fly open and he darts out of bed frantic and falls onto the floor in front of the door with a giant thud.
“Emily! Are you okay?!” Stacy screams from outside the door trying to get in. He’s panicked.
“I’m fine, Stace. Just leave us be.” I say calmly, as to not worry him.
“Okay. You better be. I’ll be inside with the guys. James will be out here waiting if you need anything,” he says from the other side of the door.
“Great. Thanks.”
Johnathan is sitting on the floor rocking back and forth in a giant man ball his eyes are wide and he looks terrified.
“Johnathan, are you okay?” I ask calmly and gently scooting closer to the edge of the bed. He keeps rocking his eyes widen further.
“Johnathan, it’s me, Emily. You know? Emily Bronwyn, your friend?” I slide off the edge of the bed a few feet from him on the floor. I take it nice and slow. This giant man is terrified and his breathing is loud.
“Johnathan. It’s me. I promise no one is going to hurt you here. It’s just you and me and everything is going to be alright,” I soothe, inching my way closer. He doesn’t say a thing and his breathing even faster now. His eyes are now closed. Shit! Please don’t say he’s fallen back to sleep. This nightmare might continue on from there. He doesn’t need that. Oh, this poor beautiful frightened man.
“Johnathan, I am going to come over and hug you, okay? Don’t be scared. No one is going to hurt you. I will never let anyone hurt you again. It’s Emily. Just please don’t hit me.” I ease in closer.
I have no idea what the hell you say in these kinds of situations I have no training in this. I feel terrible for him and my stomach is all in knots. Not for myself but because I just realized what Stacy was saying about Johnathan going through a lot of shit in his life and that’s why he is the way he is. And the whole thing about the fact he doesn’t know how to love. Something happened to him and it was bad. I don’t know what. But by the terror on his face and his body language I can’t help but want to help bring him out of this. My heart is breaking just watching this man like this.
I sit up on my knees and his body is still rocking. He’s hyperventilating. Sweat is pouring off his face. His arms are clasped around his legs in the fetal position.
“I’m here.” I place my hand gently on his back. I’m going to hug him from the side.
“It’s going to be okay.” I talk slowly and softly. I place my other arm over his so I am touching his chest and I inch my way in closer so my breasts are resting against the top of his left arm.
“Calm down Johnathan. Calm down. It’s going to be okay,” I soothe, wrapping my arms tighter around him. I press my lips to his temple. One of my hands are holding onto his right side from the back and my left his down across his chest cupping the bottom of his ribs on his other side.
“Take a deep breath big m
an. It’s going to be okay,” I say softly, my mouth on his temple. He finally responds and takes in a deep breath.
“That’s good. Now take another one and let it out slowly.”
He does.
“Emily?” he huffs in a whisper.
Oh thank you Jesus, he’s back! My heart is pounding. I brought him back! Thank god! He’s going to be alright. I was so scared.
“Yes, it’s me. You were having a bad dream when I came in to wake you,” I explain, my lips still at his temple. Now I’m breathing hard. I guess I didn’t realize I was as freaked out as I was. His hand unclasps from his leg and rubs it on the arm I have wrapped around his chest.
“Is it really you?”
“Yes, Johnathan. I’m here I promise I won’t let anything happen to you. You’re safe.” I kiss his sweaty temple. His hand runs up and down my arm. Sparks fly and my heart soars. His touch is amazing. Why do I have to feel this way about him? Shit! Now my heartaches with deep loss. I resist the urge to rub my heart because I don’t want to let him go. I don’t think it’s right yet. He’s still coming out of this nightmare.
“I had another nightmare, a bad one this time. I’m sorry if I scared you,” he says. His voice is almost back to normal as is his breathing.
“I know. I tried to wake you a few times. Are you okay?” I loosen my hold and start to pull away.
He grabs my arm. “Please just hold me a little longer. Please. I need it,” he begs. Sadness saturating his voice.
“Okay.” I retighten my grip around his stomach and I caress his back with my other. Tracing the tight muscles with my fingers. I can feel goose bumps rise on his back and he groans.
“This feels so nice. I missed you,” he says.
Cue the butterflies! Even if he is full of shit when it comes to getting me into bed he still has moments like this when I think he’s perfect in some ways. He has a sweetness at the core of him that I think he tries to hide to be strong and tough. But I can feel it in times like this when he says what he feels. I know he’s not trying to get me into bed now. This is the real man behind the mask and rock star persona.
Stricken Rock Series: Complete Box Set Page 17
