See Me, Cover Me

by Barbara Gee

  Izzy chuckled. “Doesn’t matter. He doesn’t give up on us. I should know.”

  “But why now?”

  “Maybe you weren’t ready before.”

  “Well nothing’s changed,” he insisted.

  “Except you’re here at the ranch.” Izzy shrugged. “I don’t know, Tanner, but I trust the way He works. And His timing.”

  His gaze moved beyond her, staring at something—or nothing—in the distance. “I guess I’m not real good at trusting,” he said quietly.

  “I know. It’s one of the few things about you I’ve been able to pick up on.” She gave him a tentative smile. “You can trust the people here, though. We’re the good guys, it’s okay to like us.”

  His eyes met hers again, intense and searching. “I don’t think I’m all that good at liking, either.”

  “Sure you are,” she said, sounding more confident than she felt. “You’re already developing connections to the people here, and look how much nicer you’re being to me. Baby steps, right?”

  He grunted. “Sure. Whatever.”

  She could tell he was done with the discussion. She put her hand on the front door latch, giving him one final smile. “Chin up, Tanner. It’s Virgil’s birthday. Time to party Full Heart Ranch style.” She chuckled. “Which means lots of good food and company, but no alcohol or debauchery. Can you handle it?”

  “Lead the way. I’m starving.”

  ***

  It was less than five minutes after they went inside that it happened. Such a seemingly small thing, but it was huge to Izzy.

  She was in the kitchen helping Maddy, but the open floor-plan of the house meant the people in the great-room were all visible from there. Libby and nine-year-old Hank came bursting through the front door, the boy carrying a large, wrapped gift, obviously beyond excited to be at the party.

  Ryan followed a few seconds later. He gave a cheerful wave to the ladies in the kitchen, then went to join the others mingling around in the living area. Izzy’s gaze was drawn to Tanner, who was leaning against the back of a sofa, talking to Virgil and Tuck.

  As Ryan approached the men, Tanner looked over at him, and to Izzy’s amazement a big, warm, genuine smile lit his face. He pushed away from the sofa and he and Ryan actually exchanged a hug, the manly, back-slapping kind, and the smile stayed on Tanner’s lips as they spoke.

  “Oh my word,” Izzy breathed, unable to look away from Tanner’s face. “I don’t believe it.”

  “Believe what?” Maddy asked as she set a bamboo tray on the counter beside Izzy, waving a hand in front of her face to get her attention.

  “Maddy! Look at Tanner,” Izzy said. “He’s smiling!”

  Maddy glanced over her shoulder. “So?”

  Izzy made a frustrated noise. “Well I’ve never seen the man smile. Not once. No matter how hard I’ve tried, I’ve never gotten more than just the faintest twitch of his lip. Now he’s over there practically grinning.”

  Maddy went to the fridge and grabbed some containers of washed and cut vegetables. “Maybe it takes the guys to bring out the best in him.”

  Izzy wrinkled her nose. She felt completely disgruntled and, yeah, she had to admit, a little jealous. She’d been trying for days to get Tanner to lighten up, whereas Ryan simply walked into the room and bam, instant smile.

  Beside her, Maddy chuckled. “Stop pouting and arrange these veggies. I need to go check on Caroline. She’s had poor Kay cornered in the playroom for the last ten minutes.”

  Izzy obediently loaded carrots, peppers, cauliflower, celery, cherry tomatoes, and broccoli onto the bamboo tray, attempting to make a pretty arrangement even though her mind was elsewhere. She snuck another glance across the room.

  Oh good grief. Now the irritating man appeared to be actually laughing. What super-powers did Ryan and Tuck have that she didn’t?

  She couldn’t stop looking, and as she watched him acting like a normal, well-adjusted human being, an uncomfortable feeling began to take hold. Okay, so……maybe it was actually a good thing he hadn’t smiled at her in the beginning. Or laughed. Because the man—holy cow—the man had a devastating smile. It transformed his face, pushing away the intimidating darkness and threatening to make her heart pound like a teenager’s. The truth was, if Tanner James had smiled like that the first time they’d met, her goal of befriending him might have lost its platonic bent right from the get go. Instead of going for friend, she might well have had visions of becoming more, just as her girlfriends had been afraid of.

  Woah. Izzy squirmed inwardly as that thought circled around in her head. She needed it to be gone, and quick. Tanner had made it more than clear his time on the ranch was short, and when he left, he wasn’t planning to stay in touch. Not with her or anyone else he’d met there. If she didn’t want to get hurt, she needed to forget that flash of attraction. Immediately.

  Feeling a little shaken, she forced herself to turn to the side so she’d stop staring at him like some kind of creeper. She finished the veggie tray without so much as another glance in his direction, and carried it to the buffet table that was already loaded down with food.

  Maddy returned carrying her eighteen month old, Caroline. The little girl had her daddy’s dark hair and light blue eyes, but otherwise she looked just like her mother. She was clutching a stuffed horse to her chest, and she gave Izzy a shy smile.

  “Hey there, Caroline,” Izzy said, leaning in for a quick kiss to her soft cheek. “I love your pretty purple dress. You look like a princess.”

  Maddy laughed. “Her daddy bought it for her. He dresses her as a girlie girl, and I dress her as a tomboy.” She looked over the food table and nodded approvingly. “I think that’s everything.”

  Libby joined them then, her usual happy, contented smile firmly in place. “This looks incredible, Maddy, but where’s Jolene? I thought she was going to help.”

  “She spent the afternoon in Grand Forks, at a dedication for a new ice rink,” Maddy said. “It’s in an area with a lot of underprivileged kids, and Boone’s been raising money for the project. He couldn’t be there today, though, so Jolene stood in. She said she might be late, but she brought a ton of food over this morning so I’m not complaining.”

  “I wish Boone could be here,” Izzy said.

  Libby nodded. “Yeah, we offered to postpone the party for another week or so, but he said to go ahead and do it because he’s not sure of his schedule. At least Virgil knows he’ll be back for the whole summer when he does come. Then they can ride the ranges together to their hearts’ content.”

  “And they will,” Maddy said. “I’m pretty sure Boone is going to become a full-blown rancher when he retires from hockey.”

  “Agreed,” Libby said, “and that makes me so happy. Oh, I almost forgot—I have the cake in the back of my car. Do you want me to bring it in now, or shall I leave it there until we’re ready for dessert?”

  “If your car isn’t too warm, let’s wait until we’re ready. Every inch of table and counter space is already full.” Maddy grabbed at her pocket. “Hang on, I just got a text. It’s probably Jolene.”

  Libby reached for Caroline so her sister-in-law could check her phone. “Hey, sweet girl, how’re you doing? Do you like birthday parties?”

  Caroline babbled something none of them could understand, making them laugh.

  Maddy read her screen. “Jolene said she just came through the gate. I say as soon as she gets here, we get Tuck to make a little speech and then eat.”

  “Good plan,” Izzy said. “Everyone’s already eying the food table. I think they’ll make a run on it if they have to wait much longer.”

  Within minutes Jolene walked in, looking a bit frazzled by her hurry to get there. She made a beeline through the crowd to Virgil, wrapping him in a happy-birthday hug. Kay soon joined them, hugging her husband and daughter-in-law at the same time.

  Izzy loved seeing the connection between Jolene and Boone’s parents. When Izzy had been interning at the retreat cen
ter, Boone and the Desmonds had made national headlines with the story of how Boone had been switched at birth by unscrupulous doctors who had replaced a wealthy patient’s dying baby with the healthy Boone, and no one had known about the scheme until two years ago. Before that, Virgil and Kay had spent twenty-nine years trying to come to grips with losing their only child, mourning the baby boy they thought had died. Finding out he was alive and well had been an incredible shock, and also a beautiful blessing. Everyone who knew the Desmonds had rejoiced when their son had been returned to them. Nothing could bring back the years they’d missed, but at least they had many more to look forward to together.

  Jolene eventually made her way over to the kitchen and hugged her three friends. “Thank you, guys, this looks fabulous. I’m so sorry I’m late. I actually left the dedication a little early and thought I’d have plenty of time to help get things set up. But I managed to hit the peak of rush hour, and traffic didn’t let up until I got out of the city.”

  “No problem,” Maddy assured her. “Kay came early to help out. Everything’s ready—I thought I’d have Tuck give a little happy birthday speech and then say grace before we have everyone go through the line. Does that sound okay to you?”

  “Perfect. Let’s get the show on the road.”

  At Maddy’s signal, Tuck got the attention of the thirty or so guests, gave a short but heartfelt tribute to Virgil, then said a prayer and cut everyone loose to form a line for the food.

  Izzy saw Tanner and Ryan fall in toward the back of the line. Tanner grinned at something his friend said, and just like that, Izzy was done. She needed to vent. Without thinking twice, she marched up to Tanner and grabbed his arm, tugging him away from the others.

  “I need to talk to you,” she declared, glaring up at him.

  He cocked his head and looked warily down at her. “Now?”

  She motioned for him to follow her into a hallway, away from the crowd. She walked briskly to the end, then whirled to face him, folding her arms across her chest as she waited for him to catch up to her.

  “What’s up with you, Tanner?” she asked when he stopped in front of her.

  He eyed her, obviously confused. “What are you talking about?”

  She flung out her arms. “You’ve been smiling and acting like you’re actually enjoying yourself! What in the world? Do you have a split personality you didn’t tell me about?”

  His eyes narrowed slightly. “Not that I’m aware of. Do you?” he asked cooly.

  Izzy flushed, realizing how crazy she must seem to him right now. She’d been working herself up ever since she’d seen that first smile, but poor Tanner had had no idea he was doing anything to get under her skin. Dragging him down the hall to accuse him of having a good time—like it was a crime—had taken him by complete surprise. She was definitely overreacting, but she was still riled up and not quite ready to let it go.

  She did manage to speak more calmly, though. “Come on, Tanner, I’ve been trying to get you to smile all week. I even baked for you, and all I got was a series of scowls and a few lip twitches. I was actually starting to wonder whether you have some kind of nerve damage that makes smiling impossible. Then Ryan walks in and your face lights up like it’s Christmas.”

  Tanner shook his head slowly. “You’re making me a little dizzy, Izzy.” His brows rose slightly, and she was pretty sure she saw a twinkle in the depths of his dark eyes. “Which might be a very appropriate nickname, now that I think about it.”

  She tossed her head. “My brothers call me Dizzy all the time. It doesn’t faze me.”

  “Okay, so let me get this straight,” he said patiently. “You’re keeping me away from that amazing table full of food out there because you’re ticked that I smiled at Ryan?”

  Izzy felt embarrassment creeping in. “So maybe I’m overreacting a bit, but it totally caught me by surprise. You know how hard I’ve been trying to get you to relax and let your guard down, and Ryan didn’t even have to try. You see him and immediately become Mr. Smiley.”

  Tanner put his hands on his narrow hips, which emphasized the width of his shoulders. “Would you rather your nerve damage theory was correct?” he asked.

  She gave an irritated huff. “Of course not, but I really thought you were a tortured soul in need of my intervention. Instead, you’re just a normal guy who’s apparently so annoyed by my company, you only appear miserable and damaged.”

  His eyes softened a tiny bit. “That’s not true. I don’t mind your company, and I’m probably more damaged than I like to admit.”

  “So what’s Ryan’s secret?” Izzy persisted.

  He looked at the floor for a long moment before returning his gaze to hers. “We go back a ways,” he said finally, his eyes shadowed.

  It was none of her business, but Izzy couldn’t help wanting to know more. “How far? Have you two worked together?”

  “We met through work, yeah, but he’s become a friend, not just a colleague.”

  She felt her irritation fading and she managed a sheepish smile. “Well you and I have a history, too. Almost five whole days. And I bet I already know things about you that Ryan doesn’t. Your love of cherries, for one.”

  He grunted. “I didn’t know this was a competition.”

  “It’s not.” She looked away and sighed, regretting this whole outburst. It had accomplished nothing other than making her seem a little unstable. “I don’t know why I’m making such a big deal out of a smile. It’s just that you became a different person right in front of my eyes, and I was so shocked. For some reason, it made me want to call you out.”

  When she finally got up the nerve to look at him again, the twinkle was back in his eyes. “Are you jealous of Ryan, Dizzy?”

  She grimaced, at both the question and the nickname. “More like my pride is hurt. I was so sure you needed me. Now I feel silly.”

  “Don’t. You’ve been good for me.”

  She rolled her lips together as she considered that. He certainly hadn’t given any indication he appreciated her efforts before now, but she hoped it was true. And she hoped she hadn’t ruined it in the last few minutes.

  “That’s nice of you to say, especially when I’m being so ridiculous.” She paused. “Believe it or not, in spite of my attack just now, I’m actually glad you have a good friend like Ryan. I really, really am.”

  He shoved his hands into his pockets, his dark eyes fixed on hers. “If it helps any, there’s a reason Ryan and I are so tight.”

  She waited but he didn’t elaborate. “Are you going to leave me hanging?” she prompted gently.

  He shrugged and looked down, obviously reluctant to say more. She waited, and finally he met her gaze again. “He saved my life a few years ago.”

  As his words sunk in, Izzy felt her heart drop to her toes. “Wait…….what?” she asked, her voice wavering and small. “Why did you need your life saved? I mean, you work with computers.” She wrinkled her forehead. “Don’t you?”

  He shrugged. “Sometimes. Not always.”

  “But—”

  Tanner held up a hand to silence her. “That’s all you get, Izzy. It’s time to eat.”

  “But I—” she tried again.

  He put a hand on her lower back and urged her down the hall. “This conversation is over. We have a birthday to celebrate.”

  “I have so many questions, though,” she said urgently, not caring about the food or even the party. Why in the world did Tanner need someone to save his life?

  “Questions I’m not going to answer,” he said shortly. “I shouldn’t have even told you that. I just thought it might help you understand.”

  “Tanner, wait,” Izzy tugged on his arm, bringing him to a halt before they got to the living room. He looked at her, his expression closed.

  “I can’t tell you anything more, Izzy,” he said. “I can’t talk about my work.”

  “Okay, I get it.” She smiled a little shakily. “I just want to say—I’m really glad Ryan was th
ere, wherever it was, to save you. And you can smile at him as often as you like. I’m over it. I’m sorry I even said anything.”

  His gaze gradually softened. “It’s okay. I like a girl who speaks her mind. Just not when I’m hungry.”

  Before she could respond to his teasing, he gestured for her to proceed him into the living room, and this time she did without protest.

  The rest of the group didn’t seem to have noticed their absence. Some were already seated with their loaded plates, others were still making their way along the buffet. Izzy and Tanner fell in at the rear and ended up sitting across from Tuck and Maddy, with the adorable Caroline providing plenty of entertainment as they ate.

  Tanner responded to Tuck much the same as he did to Ryan, and it was clear they were also more than mere acquaintances. The man on the other side of Tanner also engaged him in conversation, and Tanner seemed fine with it, not at all awkward or uncomfortable.

  Izzy still wasn’t sure what to make of this new Tanner James. Then came the clincher. It happened when Tuck put his little daughter on his lap and tried to get her to eat a bite of meatball. She shook her head decisively, then unexpectedly took her daddy’s face between her hands, stretching up to give him a noisy raspberry on his cheek.

  Tanner laughed. He actually laughed, and of course the man had a great laugh. Izzy barely managed to stop herself from turning to him in shock. Instead her wide-eyed gaze went to Maddy, who was looking at her with sparkling eyes. It would have made Izzy angry, except the other woman quickly took pity on her.

  Maddy stood and smiled. “Izzy, can you go tell Libby we’re ready for the cake? Then you can help me dip ice cream.”

  Maddy’s effort to get her out of close proximity with Tanner was much appreciated by Izzy, as she badly needed time to regroup. She excused herself and went to relay the message about the cake to Libby before joining Maddy in the kitchen.

  “What’s up, Iz?” Maddy asked as she handed her a tub of mint chocolate chip ice cream. “You’re not acting like yourself at all, and I’m pretty sure it has something to do with that very handsome man you came with.”