Tabby hadn’t come home after school because she and the other cheerleaders had some banners to make for the game tonight, and then she was going over to Ryan’s house to have dinner there. Grace opened the door for James, and he stepped inside. She accepted his light kiss and brief hug. He was in a good mood but concerned about how she had sounded on the phone. She led him into the formal living room at the front of the house. Unless her dad had talked to James today, she didn’t think he knew about Sarah, and for some reason she had a difficult time saying it after he asked what was up.
“Grace? Is something wrong? Did I do something?”
“No,” she said. “It’s my dad.”
“Is he all right?”
“Yes, he’s fine. Better than fine.”
James looked confused. “What’s that mean?”
“He met someone.”
James pondered her words for a moment before suspecting what she meant. “A woman?”
“Yes.”
James smiled. “In Iowa? At the conference?”
“Yes. She’s a widow, and they met there, and she’s coming here with him tomorrow.”
She could tell James was trying to be sympathetic to her feelings, but he loved her dad too much to focus entirely on her. “All right, Pastor Andy!” he laughed. “I guess Jesus isn’t the only thing you’re passionate about.”
Grace tried not to, but she burst into tears. She tried to escape. She wasn’t mad at James for his reaction, but she didn’t like to cry in front of people. The only person she did that with was her dad, but he wasn’t here and she couldn’t cry with him about this anyway.
“Hey, come here,” James said, not letting her get away. “No running away, Gracie. You called me, and I’m here.”
She cried for a long time, and he didn’t say anything. She felt stupid. She felt awful for feeling this way. She loved her dad and wanted him to be happy, but she missed her mom and still had so many unanswered questions.
“What’s her name?” James asked.
“Sarah.”
“Is she from Iowa?”
“No, Minnesota. He’s flying up there tomorrow morning, and they’re coming here together.”
“Same time as he was planning before?”
“No, a little later.”
James didn’t say anything, and she asked the question on her mind. “What if I hate her? What if I think she’s totally wrong for my dad?”
“I don’t think you will.”
“Why?”
“I know this isn’t quite the same, but I felt that way when your dad was looking to hire a worship guy at the church. I knew he was looking for someone young, and I thought, ‘What if we don’t get along? What if he’s a jerk?’ I loved being the only other pastor at the church with your dad because we had such a good relationship, and I didn’t want that to change. I didn’t want to share him with anybody--that probably sounds weird--but that’s the way I felt.”
Grace hadn’t thought about how hiring other pastors might affect James, starting with Joel two years ago and then Alan last year. She knew her dad was happy with the dynamics between the four of them, but that didn’t mean they all were.
“But everything turned out all right?” she guessed, since he was bringing this up now.
“Yes. Your dad is a great judge of character, Gracie. Joel and Alan haven’t taken anything away from my relationship with your dad, and I have great relationships with them too. And I know it’s not just because your dad knows how to pick the right people, but because he asked God to bring them. He prays and God answers--in the best way for everyone.”
“But he’s always said he didn’t think he wanted to get remarried. Why would he start praying for it now? Or has he done that? What if this woman is taking advantage of him and clouding his judgment somehow?”
“Our prayers aren’t always conscious ones, Grace. Sometimes we don’t know what we want or need, but Jesus does.”
She knew that was true. There had been times in the last five years God had given her something she didn’t know she needed until she had it. And the greatest example was the wonderful guy right in front of her.
“I guess my dad made a pretty good choice when he hired you,” she said, remembering how she had been concerned about it because Tabitha and Tate were both in high school at the time.
“You think?” he asked.
She smiled. Neither of them said anything, and James kissed her. Gently and affectionately.
“You scared me, Grace.”
“When?”
“When you told me you needed to talk and then I got here and you didn’t speak. I thought you were going to say you were changing your mind about us.”
She smiled. “I don’t think I’m going to be changing my mind. You’re sweeping me off my feet, and I’m loving it, James. You’re becoming very, very special to me.”
“You’re becoming special to me too, Grace. I mean, you already were before this week, but being close to you like this just confirms what I’ve known all along.”
“What?”
“God brought me here for a lot of reasons, but the greatest reason is the one I’ve had to wait three years for. And it’s been worth it.”
Grace didn’t think she could speak, and she didn’t. James kissed her some more, and she knew the love she felt for him was the same kind of love her mom had experienced with her dad, and what Sarah was experiencing with him now too. It wasn’t just about romance and going out on fun dates together, it was deeper than that.
It was the kind of love she would put her heart on the line for. Crazy and passionate love where she felt scared to death and completely safe at the same time. A love she would fly across the country with James for if that was the price she had to pay to be with him. And a love she would never deny anyone having. If her dad felt this way about Sarah, then she would be happy for them.
From everything she knew about her dad, and the way he had sounded on the phone last night, she knew he must. He was feeling the same way about Sarah as James was feeling about her. The thought made her laugh.
“What’s so funny?” James asked.
“Can you imagine my dad kissing Sarah like this?”
“I can’t imagine your dad holding a woman’s hand,” he laughed. “But it will be a nice sight, don’t you think?”
Grace could remember her mom and dad holding hands and giving each other light kisses when others were around. “Yes, it will be nice,” she said. “And I hope Sarah doesn’t get scared and back out of coming tomorrow. Seeing him with someone will be better than seeing him come home alone.”
Chapter Seventeen
When they left the house for dinner and the concert, Grace felt content and happy about her growing relationship with James and her dad’s plans for tomorrow. She knew some anxiety would remain until she met Sarah and could see her dad was happy, but she knew James was right about the chances of her dad making the perfect choice. If he could select a youth pastor like James and the rest of his staff as well as he had, not to mention her mom as his wife all those years ago, then the odds were in his favor.
It seemed unreal in a way, like she would wake up any minute and discover this was a vivid dream. But she knew it was real, and James’ presence by her side, along with the music and message at the concert, gave her a sense of peace. She was reminded several times God was in control of her life, and all she could do was live one day at a time and trust Him to carry her through whatever she faced.
And the truth was, the potential for suffering and difficulty was slim. She had been through a lot of that already, and she had seen God change her in many ways through it all. On the drive back, she kept looking at James and knowing five years ago, or even three, she wouldn’t have been ready for him. She’d had all these ideals about what her adult years would be like, and her plan was going like clockwork until the day her mom died, and then she realized she didn’t know anything about anything.
James wasn’t the kind of g
uy she had imagined herself marrying. In some ways he was. She had some ideals that hadn’t changed in the last five years. She had always been firm about only dating guys who shared her faith and had high standards about appropriate physical contact with her--two things that usually went together, but not always. But in other areas she had some unwritten laws that needed revising. She liked guys who were significantly taller than her, and since she was tall herself, that made her rule out anyone who wasn’t at least six feet.
She also preferred guys with dark hair, a muscular build, and unusual eye color--like piercing blue or blue-green. And the way they dressed was something she carefully scrutinized. She liked the clean-cut, dressy look and thought any guy who wore casual slacks and a nice shirt was instantly ten points cuter than someone wearing jeans and a t-shirt. She wasn’t sure where she’d come up with her list of physical characteristics she found acceptable and appealing, and she didn’t know if that somehow factored into her thinking three years ago when she first met James, but she supposed it had.
James was blonde. He had plain brown eyes. He was slightly taller than her, but not much. If she wore high heels around him, she would probably pass him up. He almost always wore shorts, even in the wintertime and to church on Sunday mornings--even on the Sundays he had to preach when her dad was gone or had asked him to speak. He was a California boy who loved the beach, outdoor activities, and had a very nice tan. And he wore a simple stud diamond earring in one ear.
“What are you looking at?” he asked, glancing at her with a smile.
“I like you, James.”
He reached over to take her hand. “With the way you were letting me kiss you earlier, I certainly hope so.”
“I like the person you are,” she clarified. “You’re you, and you don’t compromise that. I’ve known you for three years, and you never changed just to get me to go out with you.”
“If I would have known what you were looking for, I might have.”
“No, you wouldn’t. Trust me.” She laughed. “And you don’t have to.”
“Would you like to come to the funeral tomorrow?” he asked. “You don’t have to, but I’d like having you there.”
Sierra had talked her dad into letting James do the funeral for Hunter, and he was both glad about it and stressed.
“You would get to see me in a suit,” he added.
“Oh, so you do know what I like.”
“I know, Gracie. I have your facial expression forever etched in my mind of the first time we met.”
“Sorry,” she said. “Maybe I can start to erase that.”
“I don’t want it to be erased. It makes me love you all the more now.”
***
Sarah gave Faye a hug inside the airport. Chandler had a wedding today, so her daughter had agreed to see her off, but Faye wasn’t entirely supportive of her going to California. She had calmed down since yesterday, but this had been as difficult for Faye to accept as she had feared.
“Have a nice time, Mom,” Faye said with tears in her eyes. “Sorry I went a little weird on you last night. I really am happy for you.”
“Thank you, honey. And I appreciate your concern, but I’m not worried about Andrew doing anything to take advantage of me. If I had any inclination of that whatsoever, I wouldn’t be doing this.”
“Please call me. I’ll feel better when I have a number I can reach you at. Are you sure you don’t want to take my phone?”
“Yes, honey. I’m fine. I’ll call you.”
Telling Faye good-bye and turning to wait in the long line, she knew she had plenty of time before her flight would be leaving, but Andrew would be here before that, and she couldn’t wait to see him. She remembered the feeling in her heart when she told him she would go with him yesterday afternoon. It was similar to the way she felt when she had taken his hand during worship on Thursday. She was very happy about her decision and knew it was right.
She had to wait for twenty minutes at the gate before she saw him walking toward her, and during that time she had nothing but peace. She had been feeling it all day. Even during the women’s luncheon where a couple of things went wrong that normally would have left her feeling like a failure. The problems hadn’t been her fault, but that never mattered when she was in charge of something and people were counting on her leadership.
The gate area was crowded because another flight was taking off before theirs and had been delayed. She remained standing along the concourse so Andrew could spot her easily. Not wanting to step away from her bag on the floor beside her, she waited for him to come to her, and she thought she was prepared for his presence and touch, but she wasn’t.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he said, taking her into his arms and holding her close.
She couldn’t speak. They had only been apart for 48 hours, but that had been too much.
“In case you don’t remember me, my name is Andrew,” he said, using his best Midwest accent. “I met you earlier this week in Ioway.”
She smiled and stepped back to look into his face. “I remember.”
He kissed her, and the reality of it all consumed her fully at that point.
“But my daughter fears you’re one of those philandering Californians taking advantage of a desperate, grieving woman.”
He laughed. She hadn’t told Faye about Andrew before she talked to him yesterday. After Chandler’s reaction, she had felt okay with saying yes, and she still did.
“It went that well, did it?”
“She’s okay, but she wants me to call when I get there.”
Once the passengers from the other flight left the gate area, they found some seats and sat there talking about Chandler and Faye’s reaction to her news among other things until it was their turn to board the plane. Her children had both surprised her in different ways. She had expected Chandler to be the tougher one, but he’d been very supportive. Faye hadn’t been, but not for the reason she was anticipating. Sarah thought any concerns would be about her betraying Levi’s memory, but Faye had been concerned for her personal safety.
“How do you know you can trust me, and she’s not right?” Andrew asked.
“If you wanted to take advantage of me, Andrew, you had plenty of opportunities in Des Moines. You don’t need to take me to California for that.”
“And why did you trust me in Iowa?”
“Well, George and Linda knew you. You’re a pastor. Your wife’s been gone for five years, but you still wear your wedding ring; but mostly I just liked you and felt like I had to trust God to take care of me.”
“Does that bother you? That I still wear my ring?”
“No, not at all. I think it’s a testimony of how much you loved her and what an honest man you are.”
“How long are you planning to stay in California with this honest man?”
“I don’t know. How long do you think I should stay?”
He smiled and kissed her gently. “Forever.”
“I thought you said it was too soon for that.”
“That was before I was away from you for two days.”
Once they were on the plane and were waiting for it to take off, Andrew asked if she had ever been to the West Coast before.
“No, I haven’t. I’ve been to the East Coast, but not the West. This is my first trip to California.”
“It was mine too when we moved there. Annika had been to California once as a kid when her family took a cross-country vacation to San Francisco and back, but not me.”
“Do you like it there?”
“Yeah, I do. We live in a real nice area. It doesn’t get too hot, but it’s nice during the summers, and it doesn’t rain all that much. San Francisco gets more of it than we do.”
“Did Annika like it?”
“She loved it. She loved the beach.”
“Do you have pictures of your kids with you?”
He took out his wallet and opened it. He pointed to the faces on the top picture as he named each person. It was a rec
ent studio shot of him with four of his kids. Grace and Tate had brown hair like his, and Danae and Tabitha were blondes. Tabitha’s was lighter than Danae’s, and she had a very striking, beautiful appearance.
Flipping to another picture, Andrew pointed out his other son, Drew, with his wife, Kanani.
“When did they get married?”
“Last summer.”
“She’s really pretty.”
“She was born here along with her six brothers and sisters, but their parents are from Hawaii. The whole family goes to the church. Kanani’s been going there since she was two.”
Andrew handed her the wallet to study the first picture again. She didn’t think she would have any trouble telling the girls apart when she saw them, if they were all going to be there today. When she had talked to him yesterday, he didn’t know for sure. She asked him if he knew now.
“Yes, they will all be there. Even John, who is Danae’s boyfriend, and James.”
She turned back to look at the picture of Drew and Kanani, but she flipped it too far and was suddenly staring at a picture of Andrew with a very beautiful blonde-haired woman. She looked a lot like Tabitha, only twenty years older.
“Is that Annika?” she asked, knowing it must be.
“Yes, that’s Annika,” he said, his voice softening. “That was taken about a year before she died.”
“She’s beautiful.”
“I told you she was a babe.”
Sarah suddenly felt all of her forty-eight years. No wonder Andrew hadn’t been looking for another wife. How did a man find a replacement for that beautiful woman?
She refolded the wallet and handed it back to him, suddenly fearing she was making a huge mistake. As the plane began to rumble down the runway, Andrew shared what one of his kids had said about looking forward to meeting her today, and she smiled at the sweet statement, but then she went quiet and pretended to be interested in the view of the horizon. She made every effort to not cry.
October Joy (Moments In Paradise 1) Page 14
