All I Want for Christmas... Is No Christmas
Page 4
“On top of that, I’m a gay escort. Okay, I said it. Men pay me to have sex. You can’t afford to associate with me. I mean, what would that do to your career? At Thanksgiving, I knew I needed to get out of the house as soon as I could. You’re Superman and I’m kryptonite. I couldn’t do that to you. The farther away I was, the better it would be. I couldn’t put you into a situation that would hurt you. To be honest, I feared I wouldn’t have the willpower to leave if I stayed a minute longer.”
A faint smile crossed Hayden’s face. “So, when you say I can’t afford to associate with you, exactly how much do you charge? I only work for the government, but maybe I could take out a loan.”
I stared at Hayden in disbelief. He broke up laughing. “Sorry, you don’t know me well enough to understand my fractured sense of humor. I’m glad the reason you took off at Thanksgiving wasn’t something serious. I thought I had bad breath or something.”
I laughed at his joke. Hayden added, “Seriously, you gave my self-confidence a blow.”
“You?” I said skeptically. “Your self-confidence? Like hell.”
“I’m confident and in control when I have my lawyer hat on, but that doesn’t translate into my personal life,” Hayden said. “I’ve spent too much time focusing on school and my career and too little time focusing on being happy outside of that. But I’m ready for a change.” Oddly, I could say the same thing about concentrating too much on school and a career, although Hayden’s professional career was rather different than mine.
We reached the house and Hayden pulled into the garage, but he made no move to get out of the car. He turned toward me and said, “Look, I think putting yourself through school without a penny from your parents is awesome. I don’t give a damn about your having been an escort. That only confirms other men agree with what my eyes tell me, that you are hot. I’m a complete libertarian when it comes to things like sex—people ought to be able to do what they want without the government poking its nose into their bedrooms. Legalize prostitution and we’d cut the crime rate and eliminate plenty of health problems. And if done right, it wouldn’t hurt anyone. If you were getting paid to play baseball, everybody would be in awe. You’re pumping balls rather than hitting balls; so what? Being an escort merely means you’re hot and good enough at what you do to get paid.”
The light on the garage door opener went off, leaving us in darkness. Hayden leaned toward me, his face inches away from mine. “Can we pick up where we left off on Thanksgiving?” he asked. “Which, in my fantasy, involved kissing you for a long time, working my way down your chest and abs to your cock, sliding it down my throat, sucking it until it got good and hard, and then throwing my legs in the air and begging you to fuck my brains out.”
This can’t be happening, I thought. It had to be a dream. But I wasn’t about to do anything to disrupt it. Hayden’s lips pressed against mine. Soon his tongue was probing my mouth. I melted, unable to comprehend that Hayden Adler was kissing me.
We kissed for a long time, gradually fogging the windows of the car. “Let’s get out of here,” Hayden announced. “For what I have in mind we need a bed.”
Inside the house, my caution returned as I heard voices upstairs. “What if someone sees us?” I whispered.
Hayden pressed me against the wall of the hallway, kissing me again, his big hands holding my face. “Someone sees us? What if that is exactly what I want? Tonight you and I are going to join the entire family for dinner. Because I want to show you off, to brag about being with the hottest man in Aspen. Hell, the entire family already loves you and you’re practically an honorary family member, but tonight you’ll have an added connection. I want everyone to see us.”
We didn’t have to wait long for someone to see us. As if on cue, a door opened and a blast of freezing air hit us as Landon and his girlfriend Barbara hurried in from the cold. Both of their eyes went wide as they spotted Hayden pressing me against the wall. Landon, quick on his feet as always, recovered first, breaking into a big smile and letting out his trademark whoop. “Holy shit!” Landon exclaimed. “It’s about time! For two people so obviously meant for one another, it sure took you dudes long enough to hook up!” We hadn’t actually gotten to the part about hooking up yet, but I wanted that more than anything.
By now Barbara had broken into a big smile too. “I think we’re interrupting something, Lan,” she added with a suggestive voice. “But not for long. Sorry guys.” She hustled Landon down the hallway, although Landon couldn’t resist one look over his shoulder and a thumbs-up sign, his infectious grin on full display. I saw the same grin on Hayden’s face.
Hayden pulled me into his bedroom and, between more kissing and fondling, slowly undressed me. Unlike Richardson, Hayden didn’t keep a straight face when he discovered my green jockstrap, laughing and telling me he loved it. I savored every second while I stripped Hayden, getting a second chance to see the incredible body etched in my mind ever since I had first seen it a month earlier.
We spent a glorious two hours making love. I didn’t want it to end. Staring at the beautiful man next to me, I said, “You remind me of Landon.” Hayden and Landon could be twins if they weren’t six years apart. It wasn’t only the eerie similarity in looks. Like a jingle I once heard from an old TV show, they laughed alike, they walked alike, and sometimes they even talked alike.
Hayden grinned as he ran his hand across my abs and chest. “That’s a switch,” he replied. “Because I’m older, it was mostly Landon who had to hear how much he was like me. Growing up, we were always together at family events. People would inevitably think we were brothers, and I’ve always thought of Landon as my little brother. I wish we could spend more time together. He’s a great guy.” I already knew that; Hayden and I had at least that much in common.
“You know, I was interested in you from the start,” Hayden confessed. “When Landon first showed me your picture and started talking about you, I was in my third year of law school and you and Landon were freshmen in college. You looked amazingly hot, but I thought you were far too young. Landon told me you were the most mature guy he knew in college, but that didn’t sway me. In my mind eighteen-year-old kids wanted to play the field and sow their oats, and I told myself that I was past that stage.
“Still, I asked Landon about you all the time,” Hayden continued, “and Landon, being the way he is, talked about you constantly, saying he wished he was gay because he would have you in the sack in no time. He never let me forget about you. I would date a dude and Landon would listen patiently to my reservations about the guy, and then he’d announce that I shouldn’t bother because you were destined to be my soulmate. I’d laugh and wonder if maybe it was true.
“After Landon let it slip that you were escorting, you no longer seemed so young. You were clearly sowing your wild oats, so I thought maybe you would get that out of your system. On the web, you weren’t Landon’s young college buddy but a sexy, fascinating guy who intrigued me and turned me on. Your pictures were hot and I wanted you. And yeah, I seriously contemplated hiring you, but that would have been too awkward.
“Every time I planned a trip out here in hopes of spending some time with you, something came up. I must have booked a half-dozen flights and ended up canceling every one. But I held out hope, because the longer you went unclaimed, the more I thought maybe I had a chance.”
I couldn’t quite believe what Hayden was saying, but I told him my story, including the sordid details about my life as an escort. The more I opened up, the more I wanted to get it all out. Talking was cathartic. Oddly, I had come out of the closet so I didn’t have to hide, but with escorting I put myself back into a closet, merely a different one. I walled off that part of my life from my friends and spent vast amounts of energy hiding it, particularly from Landon, who had known all along. Talking with Hayden about my life as a rent boy was a massive relief.
By the time I finished laying out all—well, most—of my tawdry life as a hustler, I was back to worrying tha
t Hayden would want nothing to do with me. Sleep with me maybe, but a relationship? It was too much to ask.
Looking at Hayden, I tackled the worry head-on. “Look,” I said, sitting up in bed. Hayden’s bare chest and arms looked like heaven to me. His slight grin made me want to press my lips against his mouth once again. “I completely understand if you don’t want anything to do with me, now that you know the details of my escorting. I have nobody to blame but myself. I could have said no at a hundred points, but I never did. The last thing I want to do is to jeopardize your career because some Internet scandal site discovers you are involved with a hustler.” I could envision the lurid headlines, complete with some of the more embarrassing pictures of me from gayescortreviews.com.
Hayden pulled me into his arms. “Don’t worry about my career. I have skeletons in the closet myself, so if anything is going to derail my career it is what I’ve done, not what you’ve done. Your escorting doesn’t bother me. If it bothers someone else, that is their problem. I’m fucking proud to be in bed with a guy as hot as you are. And I’ll be proud to be seen with you wherever we are. End of story.” He planted a kiss on my lips and I melted into his arms.
Sometimes I spent weeks or months thinking about a problem and not resolving it, but I could talk about it for a few minutes and the solution would be crystal clear. This was one of those times. My conversation with Hayden illuminated a path that suddenly was obvious. I had admitted to Hayden that I could have said no to escorting at a hundred points. Why didn’t I say no now? It was time—past time—to get out of the profession. I had enough money to finish school, and the only reason I was still hustling was sheer inertia. I was five months from graduating. My escorting past could turn up in a job investigation and I might not get hired because of it. But Hayden told me most employers only looked at criminal convictions, and with the new European rules on Internet privacy, I could have websites delete personal information about me. The Internet changed so quickly that my XXX-rated pictures would be forgotten in a few months. A risk remained that they would reappear, but likely they would be lost amid the flood of online porn.
I was still contemplating my future and reliving my long afternoon of lovemaking and talking with Hayden when he said lazily, “We should get cleaned up. The family is getting together for dinner. And I want to show you off.”
“Holy shit!” I said, staring at the clock. It showed 4:58. “I’m supposed to work tonight.” I had to be at the restaurant in thirty-two minutes.
“Any way you can get out of it?” Hayden asked, disappointment showing in his eyes.
More than anything, I wanted to stay. My only hope was to beg my friend and fellow rent boy Trevor to substitute for me. Trev was the only waiter with the day off, but he probably had tricks lined up. I called anyway.
“Trev, it’s Alec,” I said, relieved as he answered the phone. I halfway expected his cell would be off because he was fucking some dude. His tricks all wanted him to top, unlike mine. “What’s happening?”
“Nothing,” Trevor replied. From his voice I could tell he was down. “It’s quiet as church on Monday. Plenty of action yesterday and tomorrow, but I guess nobody wants to hire an escort on Christmas Day.” He paused, adding hopefully, “You interested in hooking up after you get off work tonight?”
“Uh, actually I was wondering if there is any chance you would take my shift at the restaurant,” I asked hopefully. “I’ll switch and take yours later in the week.”
“Hell, yes!” Trevor replied. “I turned down an escort gig later in the week because of work. Dude was hot too. I’d probably do him for free. Switching days would be awesome.”
“Great!” I said. I paused and added, “There’s something else. Some things have changed—I’ll fill you in later—but I’m done escorting. I was wondering if you could fit in some appointments I’ve scheduled.” I smiled at Hayden’s happy look as he heard me announce my retirement from my professional career.
“Fuck, yeah!” Trevor said, excited. “You’re making my Christmas!” Then he sounded concerned. “Nothing wrong is there?”
“No, nothing wrong. Quite the opposite. Everything is great. Only doing something I should have done a long time ago.” Trevor said he had to dash to get to work in time, but he wanted the full details later.
Christmas dinner was wonderful. The food was great, everybody in the family made me feel at home, and Hayden took every opportunity to show affection. Landon was his usual buoyant self, and we were both happy that the wall I had constructed between us was down. Barbara was planning double dates for the four of us.
After dinner, the family exchanged gifts. There were no big presents, merely things evidencing some care and thought or humor. It was the first time I had sat around a big, colorful Christmas tree and watched a gift exchange. With Hayden’s arms wrapped around me, I had never been happier and more contented.
Hayden and I exchanged spur-of-the-moment presents. Landon’s birthday was in January, and I had bought a sleeveless shirt for him that I knew would make his arms look incredible. On Hayden, it would look even better, and I could always get something else for Landon. Or maybe merely the same shirt. The gift was totally selfish on my part. I wanted Hayden’s amazing arms to be bare as often as possible.
Hayden gave me a maroon Harvard polo shirt. Ironically, he planned to give it to Landon for his birthday. Landon wouldn’t miss it, as he already had two of them. “Sorry you only had a redirected present to open,” Hayden said as we snuggled in bed late on Christmas night.
“I got the best present anyone could have given me earlier today,” I said. “Making love to the man of my dreams. The polo shirt will always remind me of our first time together. And something else. It’s the first Christmas present I’ve ever gotten that I wanted.” Hayden smiled, pulling me into his arms—those incredible arms!—and kissing me.
This is the best day of my life, I thought happily. Hours earlier the day had been the worst, only to morph into the best. And it was Christmas Day! How out of character. Christmas didn’t hate me. From now on, Christmas would forever mean something wonderful. It would be a day I would never forget—the day I found Hayden. Christmas could be merry after all.
COLTON AALTO lives in a century-old brick warehouse in the LoDo section of downtown Denver with his husband and two cats, neither of whom understand how good they have it. Actually, the same can be said about Colton and his husband too.
Colton grew up in Colorado, but after finishing college, he found the East Coast intriguing (plus there was a full ride for graduate school waiting). He spent a decade on the East Coast learning how to eat Italian food, ride trains, and endure humidity. He collected a graduate and a law degree along the way and had a brief criminal justice career. Colton returned to Colorado when the lure of snow skiing and Colorado’s sunny skies proved too great to resist. He writes legal treatises and practices law, except on powder days.
A single state remains before Colton can claim he has traveled to all fifty states. He and his husband have bicycled on six continents, pedaled up passes in the Alps, ridden camels into the Sahara, and slept on the sand (okay, it was in a lavish tent). Colton does his best writing in his head while bicycling or skiing, but seldom remembers the captivating images or witty dialogue long enough to get to a keyboard. And when he gets to the keyboard, the result on the computer screen is never quite as entertaining as it was in his head.
Colton’s inaugural published fiction, a story titled “The Missing Piece,” is included in Jerry Wheeler’s Men in Love (Bold Strokes Books, 2016).
E-mail: ColtonAalto@gmail.com
By Colton Aalto
All I Want for Christmas… Is No Christmas
Published by DREAMSPINNER PRESS
www.dreamspinnerpress.com
Published by
DREAMSPINNER PRESS
5032 Capital Circle SW, Suite 2, PMB# 279, Tallahassee, FL 32305-7886 USA
www.dreamspinnerpress.com
This is
a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of author imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
All I Want for Christmas… Is No Christmas
© 2016 Colton Aalto.
Cover Art
© 2016 Paul Richmond.
http://www.paulrichmondstudio.com
Cover content is for illustrative purposes only and any person depicted on the cover is a model.
All rights reserved. This book is licensed to the original purchaser only. Duplication or distribution via any means is illegal and a violation of international copyright law, subject to criminal prosecution and upon conviction, fines, and/or imprisonment. Any eBook format cannot be legally loaned or given to others. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without the written permission of the Publisher, except where permitted by law. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Dreamspinner Press, 5032 Capital Circle SW, Suite 2, PMB# 279, Tallahassee, FL 32305-7886, USA, or www.dreamspinnerpress.com.
Digital ISBN: 978-1-63533-177-6
Published December 2016
v. 1.0
Printed in the United States of America