A Royal Pain (The Royals Trilogy Book 1)

by Brown, Tara

  I rubbed my eyes and stifled a yawn. “I’m good, thank you. How are you?”

  She clapped her thin hands. “Excited. I can’t believe you’re finally here. It took forever for you to arrive. Mary is wonderful, but she is so young and naive. I’m excited to have a girl closer in age to me.”

  I didn’t know what the deal was. Mary was only a year younger than me. Didn’t she have friends in the city? “Thanks, me too. You must have loads of friends here though.”

  “No. I’m from England. I don’t know anyone here, and we don’t really leave the manor that often. The king does business in town, but the queen stays here most of the time. Leaving requires an entire troop of guards. It’s almost not worth it.”

  I scowled. “You stay with her?”

  She swallowed hard. “It’s a different life, Finley. Hence the reason I am over the moon you are here to divert my attention. It can get a bit tedious. Now I understand why royal females always do so many charities and things. You go from being a normal girl to being a kept woman.” She placed a hand on the covers where my leg was. “I am not trying to scare you. Sorry. I just miss having my friends, you know?”

  “No. I brought mine. Trust me, if you want a diversion and some entertainment, she is three doors down on the right and completely crazy.”

  She laughed. “Oh, I do hope she gets on with my friends who are arriving tomorrow. I feel like they’re ladies-in-waiting together.”

  I lifted my eyebrows. “Is it really that intense here?”

  She sighed. “They’re such a new monarchy that they’re trying to ensure certain customs aren’t lost. It is very formal, similar to our cousins in England.”

  “You’re related to the Windsor family as well?”

  She laughed. “Of course. I am related to the queen. We are very removed, obviously. But all royal couples share some blood. Even the peasants. You know William and Kate are related to me, both of them. They are twelfth cousins once removed from one another. I am an eighth cousin once removed from Geoffrey.”

  I didn’t know what that meant so I nodded. “Weird. So how did you and Geoffrey meet?”

  She laughed. “On a yacht after we’d been told we were to marry. It was in Marseille.”

  “What’s he like?”

  Her dark eyes sparkled. “The opposite of Aiden.”

  “Really?”

  She nodded. “He is about doing his duty.”

  “You must be too though, huh?”

  She laughed. “I am about as interested in the monarchy as I hear you are.” She flashed me a smile. “Aiden and I went to school together. We are old friends. When he told me about you, I had to laugh. Of course he would find a girl who was as far removed from this life as she could be. I like that you will never be what they want you to be.” She winked. “Makes me look better.” She snuck a grape from my tray and stood up. “I will leave you to get dressed, but hurry. We must have tea and gossip and make a battle plan.” She got up and left the room with a slight wave.

  I didn’t know if I should hate her, like her, or love her. She was clearly normal and being forced to fit in. At least she wasn’t so different from me. But she seemed to have it down pat. She came in, she smiled and waved, made it seem like she was awesome, but really left me nothing I could use against her. She was a master. I needed to follow in her footsteps if I was going to make it through Christmas alive.

  Linna came in, dressed like she was going out for the night. I sighed. “You can’t wear that. His whole family will be in sweaters and pants. Mini skirts and cleavage are not on the menu.”

  She looked down. “I look sexy. I wanna dry hump Johan anyway. This is my dry hump skirt.”

  “Did you meet Alexandria?”

  She wrinkled her nose. “Fake ass ho, if you ask me. She is trouble with a capital T and she likes Aiden. Kept asking me weird shit.”

  That hadn’t been my impression at all. I opened my mouth and closed it. Linna was the bitch whisperer. She always picked out the girl who was meaner than her, even the ones who were really good at being friends. She always managed to avoid them, all but Sheila. She never saw that one coming. But beyond that, she had the nose for smelling a scamming ho.

  She pointed a finger at me. “TRUST me. That one is out for your man and to make sure you are ruined. That’s a fo sho ho!”

  I laughed at her name for scammy hos. The last fo sho ho Linna had called out told everyone the video of her going down on a guy in senior class last year was me. I wasn’t even at the party. Luckily, my alibi had been solid: alcohol poisoning. We had the same hair, and from a distance, it could have been me, but the time stamp on the video ruined it, and she got her ass kicked by the guy’s girlfriend.

  “You better avoid her. I got the nose for this. Remember when you were all friends with Becca Johnson and she tried to tell everyone it was you having a meet and greet with Mark’s johnson at that party? Scammy ho.” She sat on the bed and stole my yogurt. “Your breakfast is better than mine. Can I have this?” She took my Danish.

  “Yeah.” I contemplated it all. “She did seem smooth. You know what smooth talkers are like.”

  Linna raised her eyebrows. “Dude, I’m a smooth talker. You don’t have to tell me. I know. Smooth talker makes a smooth liar.”

  “That sucks. She seemed kinda awesome.”

  “Oh, she is for sure awesome. She’s just also pissed you got the good brother.”

  “Yeah, it did seem like that was the point she was making. Booooo. I hate it when I end up rope-a-doped by some chick.”

  Linna took a bite of the Danish. “‘Kay, I’m gonna go change into my casual clothes. You need to look hot but like you aren’t trying too hard.”

  “You mean don’t wear club clothes like you?”

  She flipped me the middle finger. “I am going to dry hump him at some point this week.”

  I grimaced. “He’s like sixteen.”

  She held a hand under her chin. “You see the care on my face?”

  “Dirty!”

  She bowed. “At your service, milady. Now hurry up and take a shower.”

  I laughed and got up. I grabbed my shower bag and brought it in, but the shower was filled with yummy hair products from Oscar Blandi. I couldn’t believe they had his stuff in Andorra.

  I grabbed my razor and soap and left my bag of stuff on the counter. The showerheads looked like screens in the roof or fans. But when you turned them on, the water dumped out like you were in a downpour. There were no steam jets, but the tiles heated when I turned on the light switch and it got steamy on its own.

  I tilted my head back, letting the water beat down on me. I wished it could wash away my troubles.

  I heard a noise and opened my eyes to see Aiden smiling down on me, completely naked. “Ah!” I jumped back. “What are you doing?”

  He laughed. “I thought I would surprise you.”

  I shoved him a bit. “You should have made a noise.”

  “I did.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, when you were in here. What’s wrong with calling out that you’re coming in so I don’t slip and cut my back up again, or worse?”

  He pulled me into him. It felt weird for our naked bodies to be against each other. He kissed the top of my head. “I missed you. You’ve been sleeping for almost twenty-four hours.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Seriously.” He nodded. “I was going to come and wake you for a morning ski, but Alex said I should let you sleep in. She said she wouldn’t appreciate it if Geoff woke her up.”

  My insides started to burn. “Let me guess. She came skiing with you?”

  He paused. “You look angry about it.”

  “I don’t care if you ski with her. I just worry that you’ll give her the wrong impression.”

  He pulled back. “What?”

  “She’s in love with you. I didn’t want you to hurt her feelings. Unless, of course, you’re into her.”

  His face reddened. “You talked to M
ary about her?”

  I felt my face redden too. “You mean Mary thinks Alex is in love with you and warned you about it, but you’re still doing things alone with her?”

  “Petty jealousy doesn’t look good on you.”

  I pointed at the opening to the shower cave. “OUT!”

  He grabbed my arm. “You are acting insane. Mary is wrong. Alex and I have been friends for years.”

  “Have you ever hooked up?”

  His eyes burned. “That is none of your business. That’s my past.”

  “Oh my God. You hooked up with your brother’s wife?” I pushed him off me. “We aren’t arguing about this. If Linna noticed it, I know it’s true. But adding Mary to the list of witnesses makes it so obvious. The worst part is that you’ve fucked around with Alex yet let your brother marry her. Dude, you have an issue.” I couldn’t believe I’d been so stupid as to smile at the bitch instead of cutting her with my bagel knife.

  His eyes never lessened in angry hate. “You mean Linna is the one who put this idea in your head.”

  I scoffed. “Linna has an amazing talent when it comes to whores, trust me on this one. She can smell a home-wrecker from five miles downwind through a perfume sampler. She has mad skills. If you can’t see it, then I feel sorry for you and your poor brother. But I’m not going to play Alex’s obvious game of putting a wedge between us and breaking us up. I don’t want this to turn into you having to choose some old girlfriend, who also happens to be your sister-in-law, over me. I’m not going to ask you to choose between us. I might only be eighteen years old, but I have learned one thing for sure: bitches like Alex allllllways get what’s coming to them. They always slip up. If you want to be alone with your brother’s wife, then have at it. I’m not married to you. I have no claim on you. I won’t try to control you. I trust you, and when she makes a complete fool of you, I won’t have to say I told you so. I’m saying it right now.”

  He clenched his jaw. “I can’t believe you would trust Linna over me.”

  “Dude, I am all about the devil I know, and I KNOW Linna. You are new; she is old. It isn’t Linna putting this wedge between us. It’s you. I don’t care what you do with Alexandria—have an affair, I don’t care. If you and me aren’t meant to be, I will survive.” It was a lie and my heart was broken, and I was jealous like I didn’t want to describe, but I wasn’t letting her win. I wrapped my arms around him, even if it made me sick to do it, and planted a soft kiss on his cheek. “I love you and trust you. You gave me your heart, remember? It won’t be me breaking it.”

  He growled, but I pressed my lips against his, cutting him off. I forced a smile and wondered how the hell I’d avoid whatever pitfalls she had set up for me.

  Last week a friend came to school with earrings that were so dangly I would swear she was going to try to read my palms.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Tragedy

  The tree was ridiculous. It was so big I felt like a woodland creature next to it, like I could be a squirrel on the branch. The great room was the only family room in the house. It had a cozy feel to it, the same way a stadium did. The walls were normal, the fireplace was made of river rocks, and the ceiling was lined with large wooden beams amongst its high peaks. One whole side of the room was windows, huge windows. It really was amazing and actually suited the outside of the chalet. I felt like I should be wearing a sweater and drinking cocoa. Instead, I was in a silk blouse and some slacks that Mary had made me buy before I left the US. I even had on some necklace she demanded I buy. Pearls. Like I’d borrowed them from Marbles.

  Mary watched my eyes as she made her move. I smiled when I rolled the dice and moved my man, sending her to the middle of the board. “You had to have learned to play from Jack and Millie. This is outrageous. Do Americans even play backgammon? I’ve been playing my whole life.”

  I laughed and glanced at Linna. She had Johan cornered. His cheeks were on fire, but he leaned into her when he spoke. “Forget this game, that’s trouble right there.”

  Mary laughed. “You think Linna is the trouble, but my brother is a rogue who can handle himself.” Her eyes darted to the far corner of the room where Alex and her three friends sat. “That is the big worry around here. My mother chose based on pedigree, not personality.”

  I lowered my voice to match hers, “You suspect she has feelings for Aiden, don’t you?”

  “Why, no.” Her eyes lifted to meet mine, holding an answer in them that was contrary to her words. “I would never say something like that.”

  “I wouldn’t need you to.”

  She put a finger to her nose. “I know. You have Linna. I have heard of her infamous ho-meter. She filled me in.”

  “Oh my God, she is slowly converting you.”

  She sighed and made her move. “I find her impossible to dislike. I have tried. She is vulgar and uncouth, yet I can’t help but adore her. She is like a sister to me now, even after only a few weeks.”

  “Oh, trust me, I know.”

  Our chat was interrupted by a commotion in the other room. All heads turned as the queen came rushing in. Her eyes were wide and filled with tears. I searched for Aiden but didn’t see him. My heart was pounding as she crumpled into Mary’s arms, sobbing, “My b-b-boy!” she wailed. “He’s gone!”

  I didn’t even know if she meant Aiden, but terror filled me. Mary looked at me. I could see the same terror on her face. I jumped up and ran from the room, searching for an answer. The king was leaned against the railing, taking deep breaths. He was visibly upset, but he didn’t cry like the queen. He lifted his head and stormed down a hallway away from me.

  Aiden’s youngest brother, Jack, came into the hall. I glanced his way. “What’s going on?”

  His face was pale. “Aiden and Geoff have been in an accident. The helicopter crashed. One is alive and one is not, and we don’t know which is which.”

  I dropped to my knees, my mouth hanging open. Linna came running out, wrapping her arm around me. “Johan thinks it’s Aiden who is alive. He was wearing a red jacket. The rescue workers were saying the prince in the red jacket is alive. He’s unconscious but alive.”

  I closed my eyes. “Oh my God. I think I’m going to be sick. Why did they have to go heli-skiing? Aren’t there rules about princes making poor choices and doing dangerous things?”

  She dropped to her knees too. “I don’t know, but I feel really bad for their family.”

  We sat on pins and needles, on the stairs, away from the family, waiting. Time moved slowly, yet no one spoke. Mary had drugged her mother and put her to bed. For a girl who had just turned seventeen, she was resilient. She didn’t cry. She sat on the stairs and waited with us. I could almost see the lump in her throat.

  Alex and her friends stayed in the living room. I heard a bit of laughter coming from the room and scowled. Linna said the thing I was thinking. “Isn’t she worried at all?”

  Mary scoffed but said nothing.

  The door opened, breaking hearts and healing them all at once. Aiden limped in, looking not much worse for wear than he had when he left that morning. I jumped up, running to him. I wrapped myself around him and let the tears flood my face. It was sick to be relieved it wasn’t my boyfriend who was gone, but I couldn’t help it. I was grateful. He shook as he gripped me. I whispered, “I am so sorry.”

  He kissed the top of my head. “I have to go and tell my mother—and I guess Alexandria.”

  I nodded and he kissed my head once more, taking in a deep breath of me. He limped away from me to Mary. She sobbed, the dam breaking and spilling her sadness everywhere. The brother and sister gripped each other. Suddenly, Johan and Jack were there. They all clung to each other and then entered the great room together.

  I sat back on the stairs. “We shouldn’t be here for this. We should leave.”

  Linna squeezed me. “I know. I was just thinking the same thing. This is a family tragedy and we aren’t family.”

  It was silent for a moment before the hall
s filled with the sound of Alex screaming and crying from inside the library. She was upset now. Mary came walking from the room and sat on the stairs with us again.

  “I’m so sorry, Mary.”

  She shook her head. “Me too.”

  The king walked past us to the great room. Alex’s crying got louder when he walked in. Mary sighed. “I guess I better go and tell my mother.” She left us sitting on the stairs.

  We stayed there for a long time. The light outside was gone and the hall was dark. The servants were gone or hiding and the family stayed in the great room. The only movement we saw was the queen rushing in there with Mary behind her.

  Linna looked at me. “We should call for a cab back to Barcelona.”

  “It’s like a two or three-hour drive.”

  Her face was pale. “I’m not getting in another helicopter.”

  “Okay, I’ll go find someone and tell them to get us a car and driver. I’m sure they have some old junker no one will miss that they can get us back to Barcelona with.”

  She looked at me. “You sure you shouldn’t stay for him?”

  “He’s going to need to focus on his family now. I’ll just be in the way, and I don’t want him thinking he has to entertain us. I feel weird being here. If it were my sister, I’d just want to be alone.”

  She nodded. “If it was you, I’d want to be alone too.” She didn’t have a sister. I was as close as it got. It was why we fought like sisters. “I’ll go pack our stuff and get it ready to go.”

  We got up. She went upstairs and I went in search of a servant. The halls were dark everywhere, with only the moonlight to guide my way. I didn’t want to turn on a light. I didn’t want to disturb a single thing. I just wanted to be gone before they even had to worry about us. I would die if Jess died. I couldn’t imagine the pain they were all in.

  I found a woman in a uniform in the kitchen. She was making up trays of food. I waved. “Hi.”

  “Hi.” She had a thick accent.

  “Do you speak English?”