A SEAL's Pleasure

by Tawny Weber

  Tessa laughed in delight.

  “Aren’t you handy,” she said. “But I don’t have a glass.”

  “Live dangerously,” he suggested with a wicked grin. “Chug it from the bottle.”

  So she did, appreciating the gesture and the excellent vintage. When she offered him a drink, he shook his head to indicate that this one was all hers.

  He was so damned good-looking, leaning back with his elbows in the sand, his feet crossed casually at the ankles as he stared out at the water. His entire demeanor was mellow.

  She frowned, looking closer as she realized that there was a whole lot of stress going on under that mellow. She’d been so self-involved that she hadn’t seen it before.

  She wasn’t so self-involved that she thought those frown lines were because of her, though.

  “Are you okay?” she asked quietly, reaching out for just a moment to skim her fingers over the back of his hand.

  “I’m watching Mother Nature’s glory with a beautiful woman by my side. How could I not be okay?”

  Tessa’s lips twitched.

  Charm.

  The guy must bathe in it.

  She wanted to push the issue. To insist he open up, share his worries so she could try to help. Either that or pull him close into a soothing hug.

  “I’ll bet you were a great Boy Scout,” she heard herself saying instead.

  Better, since asking emotional questions would obligate her to answer them in return. And she wasn’t quite that peaceful yet.

  “Me?” He laughed. “The closest I’ve come to being a Scout is the SEAL team.”

  Tessa frowned when his smile faded. A trickle of worry seeped down her spine. His job, his entire world—it was so dangerous. Was there something wrong with his SEAL team? She opened her mouth, wanting to ask, needing to be reassured that his safety wasn’t in danger.

  But she couldn’t ask.

  “I’m surprised you weren’t a Boy Scout,” she said, opting for the chicken route once again. “You’ve got that always-prepared thing down pat.”

  “Scouting wasn’t big on the reservation. Later I was living on the streets more often than not so would have missed the meetings.” He shrugged.

  “Reservation?” Fascinated, Tessa shifted in the sand so she could more clearly see his face.

  “I spent my first handful of years in and out of foster care until my grandfather found me. He took me to live with him on the reservation,” he said, his eyes distant as he watched the stars overhead. “He died when I was eleven.”

  “I’m so sorry.” Unused to offering sympathy but unable not to, Tessa reached out again to lay her hand over the back of his. She gave it a quick squeeze, but before she could pull away, he turned his over so their fingers entwined.

  Telling herself it was to offer comfort and not because his touch sent delicious zings of sexual delight through her body, Tessa left her hand there.

  “He’d lived a full life,” Gabriel said with another shrug. “And he taught me a lot. I learned the importance of setting rules I could live with. He was big on dedicating oneself to a path and living it with honor.”

  His voice took on that edge again, frustration and pain layered with anger.

  “Are you okay?” she asked, her fingers tightening on his.

  “Fine.”

  “You don’t sound fine.”

  He gave her an arch look.

  “Why don’t we discuss what’s bothering you first?” he suggested. “You know, pretend we have a real relationship where we share these little things.”

  “Sarcasm,” she observed, totally in sync with the deflective benefits of well-placed snark. “Nicely done.”

  He grinned, tilting his head in thanks. And, she realized, as a dare for her to step up and accept that they were really in that relationship he’d mentioned.

  Relationship. Her feet twitched, her mind screaming at her to grab her shoes and run. But she’d run yesterday. She’d like to claim that doing the same thing twice made her predictable, and what woman wanted that label? But the reality was, she’d been miserable after running. And worse, she realized with a pang, she’d hurt Gabriel.

  Did that mean he was right? They were in a relationship?

  Okay, fine.

  She took a deep breath, hoping it’d smother the panic clawing its way through her nervous system.

  “I’m sorry I blew you off. Earlier and yesterday. I was...” The words stuck in her throat, forcing her to clear it before she could continue. “Us, together, it was amazing.”

  “And amazing makes you run?”

  There was no judgment in his voice, no anger on his face. Just acceptance and a sort of understanding that almost made her cry.

  “Amazing is a little scary,” she admitted quietly.

  “Yeah.” He squeezed her hand. That gentle pressure said more than a thousand words, letting Tessa know that he understood, that he felt exactly the same.

  “We’re selling Flirtatious,” she admitted, surprised at how little it hurt to actually say the words aloud.

  “Your magazine?”

  “Yeah.” She explained the history of it, starting with Jared’s weird behavior and ending with the call from Maeve. The entire time, he listened with an intensity that made her a little nervous. She was used to surface interactions. It’d be easy to drown in these depths.

  “It sounds like a great deal,” he said when she’d finished.

  “It is,” she agreed. Then, after a brief hesitation, she added, “But there’s more.”

  “Tell me.” Gabriel shifted onto his side. The way his long body ranged out next to her would have offered a distraction if not for the intense look on his face.

  “The media company offered me a job. They want me to come on board with them and write for three different publications, including Flirtatious after they take it over.”

  “That sounds excellent, but you don’t seem to think so,” he observed with an astute look.

  Tessa hesitated. How did she explain that she already felt enough like a fraud doing something she was supposedly good at someplace with a built-in safety net like Flirtatious? The idea of doing more of it, with a bigger audience, was terrifying.

  “It’s hard for me to share this kind of thing,” she said with a rueful laugh. “Hard for me to open up. Admitting problems isn’t good for the image.”

  “The image you present to the world? Or the image you have of yourself?”

  “Both.” She laughed, lifting her free hand in the air as if to say there was really no difference.

  “Would it help if I tell you that I see a lot more than an image when I look at you?” he asked. “I see a strong woman, a sexy one who knows her own worth and demands that the world respect that. I see a woman with a wicked sense of a humor, deep wells of compassion and a huge heart. One who puts friends first, protects herself at all costs and who can do some very, very interesting things with her tongue.”

  She laughed at that last part, trying not to squirm over the rest. Whether it was his smile, or the fact that she needed to distract her from the fact that she was blushing—something she couldn’t ever remember doing before—she decided to confess.

  “I don’t know if I’ll be good at it. Writing my columns, the articles, they’ve become more difficult over the past year. I feel as though I’m just recycling the same old thing, relying on stale formulas and internet alerts instead of sharing something worthwhile.” She stopped short of saying she felt like a failure, thinking that he was a smart guy, he could figure that part out himself. “But it’s a great opportunity, a chance to make a lot more money and reach so many more readers. Fame, fortune... I’d be a fool to say no, wouldn’t I?”

  “Will they want you to write the exact same type of content as you have
been?”

  She hadn’t asked. But if Jared had shut her down based on reader expectations, she couldn’t imagine the new publishers would be any different. Frowning at their joined hands, Tessa shrugged. “It’s what I’m known for.”

  “But is it what you want to remain known for? You’re great at what you do, angel. Don’t doubt that. You bring a tongue-in-cheek humor to a minefield that a lot of people are struggling to navigate, and you do it in a way that makes them feel good about themselves. But if you feel as though you’ve tapped it out, maybe it’s time to expand the field. Not leave it, but expand it.”

  Tessa felt little tingles of excitement. She could so totally do that. Branch out a little, maybe delve into other topics. That didn’t mean she’d be good at them, though.

  The tingles took on a pained edge.

  What if she was as much of a fraud writing about throwing parties or finding the perfect pair of boots as she was at flirting?

  “What if they don’t want that?” she asked with a frown, wanting to drop her head into her hands and scream. Or run for the nearest therapist’s couch for an overhaul.

  “Sometimes I think we get so hooked on what we’re known for, so comfortable in our persona, that we’re afraid to make changes. Even when not making changes hurts.”

  Tessa waited for him to continue. To tell her exactly what she should do. Did she take the offer as is, did she push them to expand her assignments before she took it? Or did she simply walk away?

  But he didn’t say anything else. He just watched.

  And then she understood.

  She was lousy at taking advice. If he told her what to do, she’d throw up a million excuses. Either that or go in the opposite direction.

  “You understand me a little too well for my own good,” Tessa admitted nervously. But there was a warm sort of joy in her heart that kept the nerves from getting out of hand.

  “The way you feel about your image I feel about my reputation.” He shot her a wicked smile. “Despite our rough start, I have a reputation for being damned good at what I do, being easy to get along with and dependable to work with.”

  She nodded. She’d seen him with Mitch, with his other team members, often enough to see the respect and trust they all had for each other.

  “But I can’t imagine you’d ever have to worry about anything you do affecting that,” she mused.

  “Sometimes we don’t have a choice. Other factors always come into play. Sometimes the hardest thing to do is accept that. In the SEALs, we train for months before a mission. We play out multiple scenarios, plan for every possibility. Even when we’re sure of what we’ll be facing, we still develop alternate options.”

  “And if those other factors screw it all up?” she queried, thinking about how hard it would be to get another job writing if she took this offer and blew it.

  “Then we deal with the fallout. That’s life,” he said, lifting her hand to brush a kiss over her knuckles. “Reputations, images, plans—they all give way to life.”

  “Aren’t you the philosophical one,” she teased.

  “Go on enough missions, fight enough battles, and it’s hard not to be,” he said with a one-shouldered shrug.

  But she knew it was more than that. His upbringing, his heritage, even that layer of sweetness in his personality—they all played a part.

  Tessa swallowed hard as the realization of what he really was hit her.

  Sure, he was a gorgeous man.

  Sexy, amazingly sexy. Charming, amusing and tempting, undoubtedly.

  She already knew that he was incredibly talented in bed. He probably knew things that she, in all her varied experiences both personal and anecdotal, had never experienced. But he was just as schooled in life. He’d dragged himself out of a humble, challenging childhood to embrace a career that he obviously loved. He was one of the elite, which meant he was not just dedicated, but damned good. And he was so smart with insights that saw right to the heart of an issue, no drama or fluff.

  But the bottom line was, he was a warrior.

  A man driven to protect, to fight, to serve.

  A man who understood her, she realized. Inside and out, he saw her for who she was better than she did herself.

  And he made her feel incredible about that.

  Feeling as though she was on the edge of a terrifying cliff and about to fall into the scariest emotion in the world—love.

  “I don’t like seeing you upset like this,” he told her, looking more angry for her than he had for himself. “Since my usual MO when I see something I don’t like is to either fix it, distract from it by having sex or blow it up, I’m in a quandary.” Looking as if he was more than willing to settle on the third option, Romeo lifted her hand to his lips and brushed a gentle kiss against her palm.

  Her eyes filling at the sweetness of his gesture, Tessa blew a mental kiss at the idea of keeping her heart locked away. And just like that, she felt herself fall over the edge of that cliff. It wasn’t a fall, though. It was a headfirst dive into love.

  Her laugh was a little husky, her heart pounding with confusion and excitement.

  She wasn’t ready to tell him yet, though.

  So she went with her favorite option instead.

  Sex.

  “Actually, you can help me out,” she told him in a soft voice.

  “Yeah?” His smile glinted in the afternoon sun as he reached out to twirl a strand of her hair between his fingers. “What can I do? You name it.”

  “Me,” she said simply. “Do me.”

  12

  DAMNED IF HE didn’t feel incredible.

  A nice change from the previous night. But hey, great sex, a fabulous view and a woman who made him feel like some kind of hero did amazing things for a guy’s mood.

  His elbows on the railing overlooking the beach, Gabriel grinned as he watched Tessa work out on the beach with Livi and a handful of other women. With the sun setting behind them, they made quite a picture. Especially Livi’s aunt, who was sporting a neon green Mohawk and wearing high-top sneakers.

  But as distracting as the neon was, his eyes were locked on his angel. God, she had a gorgeous body. Subtly muscled, she moved through a series of jump-squat lunges with ease. He’d love to get her in a gym and see what she could press. He’d bet she could put a few guys he knew to shame. It was easy to get distracted by the sexy curves and silky skin and miss the strength.

  His smile faded as he thought back to their earlier conversation. He wasn’t sure what had surprised him more. That she was sporting so many doubts about her talent, or that she’d told him. He’d hid his shock, but he should have offered more solid feedback, maybe some support. He’d meant to. But then she’d distracted him with sex, sending all thoughts—along with most of his blood supply—south of his zipper.

  As the group moved on to push-ups Livi went from person to person, adjusting their stance or offering encouragement. But not Tessa. Nope, his angel had perfect form and dived in without instruction or, apparently, any need of praise. He wasn’t sure if that spoke to the solidity of their long-term friendship and was a part of their workout style or if the fitness coach simply overlooked Tessa because she was so self-sufficient.

  That was why she needed him. To lean on, to depend on. He saw her strengths, appreciated her talents, but he also recognized her vulnerabilities. He knew how to push her, how to encourage her so she felt good about herself even when she didn’t realize she’d been feeling bad.

  He figured a woman like Tessa could take care of herself financially. She didn’t need a man for security and she could readily find plenty to fill her sexual needs—although not nearly as well as he could. But no other man would ever understand her, would ever value her the way he did. And that was what he brought to their relationship.

  Tha
t, and a desire to spend the rest of his life showing her just how amazing they could be together.

  Damn.

  Gabriel tried to swallow, but he had no spit.

  Dry-mouthed and slightly ill, he stared down at Tessa as she stretched out on the sand.

  Was this love?

  He suddenly understood why Tessa had run away the day before. Amazing was scary. Scary as hell.

  But he’d never backed down from a challenge before. He wasn’t about to start now.

  Nope, now it was time to up his game and go for the ultimate challenge.

  He’d caught his angel.

  Now he just had to keep her.

  Before he could begin to figure out how, someone stepped up to the railing next to him.

  “Yo.”

  As soon as Gabriel glanced over, his smile faded.

  His senses went on high alert, his body tightening and his mind clearing in preparation for whatever was about to hit him. That he’d be hit was a given. That it’d hurt was probable. That he could deal with it?

  He gave a mental shrug.

  The way he felt right now, he could deal with anything.

  “Irish,” he greeted with a jerk of his chin. No point in asking what was going on. He’d be told when it was time. “When did you hit the island?”

  “Just now,” the other man said, looking at the beach with a frown. He jerked his chin toward his pregnant fiancée, who was now stretching her arms overhead as if greeting the sky. “Is she taking it easy?”

  “Yeah. I watched the workout. She’s dialed it back to mellow.” Gabriel angled his head to get a better view of Irish’s face. The setting sun cast an orange glow over his features, but didn’t disguise the strain. Gabriel glanced back at the women, then at Irish again.

  Damn it all to hell.

  “Problem?”

  “Mission details.”

  His tension ratcheted up a few tight notches. Gabriel shoved his hands into his pockets and rocked back on his heels, contemplating what those details might be. Bile curdled in his belly as he wondered if he’d ever find out. Details were issued on a need-to-know basis. If he wasn’t on the mission, wasn’t on the team, he didn’t need to know.