Family Ties (Hidden Secrets)

by Belden, P. J.

  “Not everything is about you Mary!” Nick snaps.

  I drop his hand and back away from him at the sudden anger he displayed. Never in all growing up has he ever snapped at me like that. It broke my heart a little.

  “Mare…” he started.

  “No, it’s okay. I understand.” I said not looking at him, turning to walk out of the kitchen.

  “She left,” he said quietly.

  “Who left?” I question, turning to face him.

  His head dropped and he sighed. “Jennifer. She left me.”

  “What? Why?” I exclaimed, moving toward him.

  Nick has been dating a girl named Jennifer Wells. She was beautiful and honestly perfect for my out of control brother. Well, he was out of control before he met her. Nick would have a different girl practically every day of the week. Every event he ever came to of mine before Jennifer he had a different girl. But then he met Jennifer and everything changed. He mellowed and only had eyes for her. Jennifer and I had actually become friends pretty quickly.

  “She said she needed space that we weren’t on the same page.” Lifting his head slowly, he looked at me with the saddest look on his face. “Mare, I told her I loved her and she leaves.” He looked completely broken.

  Wrapping him in my arms, I cooed in his ear. “She’ll come back Nick. I just know it.”

  Pulling back, he reaches over, grabs some paper towels, wrapping them around his hand. “I doubt it. She’s moving to California. I can’t believe I finally fall in love with someone and they walk away.” He said sadly, shaking his head. “See ya in the morning, Mare. Please don’t the two of you destroy my house.” With that, he kisses the top of my head, and then walks out of the room.

  Watching his retreating back, I made a mental note to call Jennifer in the morning and find out what’s going on. Just as I walked out to the entryway, the doorbell rang. Peeking through the peephole, a smile spreads across my face when I see Kylee making a funny face at the peephole. Laughing, I open the door.

  “Oh my God! It’s Mary ‘Songbird’ Williams! I can’t believe I’m meeting you! I’m like your biggest fan!” She fake fangirls.

  “As I live and breathe, is that Kylee ‘Midas’ Williams?” I said in my best southern accent.

  Laughing, she held out her arm – the other had a pizza box in it – and I leaned in for a hug. Walking inside, we went directly into the living room. One thing I loved about hanging out with Kylee was that she didn’t beat around the bush. When you had something to talk about or she had something to say, she didn’t do idle chit chat. No procrastination.

  “What’s going on?”

  “Kyle has been attacking me.” I said without looking at her, instead I opened the pizza box on the coffee table.

  “What?” She breathed. “How long? What do you mean by ‘attacking’ you?”

  “He hits me, um, a lot…” This was harder than I thought it’d be.

  “Mare?” I look up at her. “Has he done more than hit you?”

  I dropped my head, shaking it slowly. “No, but he’s tried. He…He carved me, on my butt. He wrote his name.” Shifting on the couch so she can see my back, I trailed my finger from one side of my butt to the other. “And for a few years now.” I summed it up. I could have told her down to the minute, but she didn’t need to know that.

  Kylee gasped. “Mary! Why? Why have you been- God I can’t even understand why you were keeping this from us. What the hell? Our family is not as close as we thought if y’all can’t even tell us when you’re being hurt.”

  “Maybe not or maybe we just don’t want to bring anyone down with us,” I state defensively.

  “I’m not trying to upset you Mary, but it’s kind of bullshit! If something like this or like what happened to Kayla,” she flung her hands in the air. “Hell what even Colleen went through, I would definitely be going to someone for help! There is no way in hell I would let someone take away my life-,” she stopped her rant a second. “Mary,” taking my hands in hers, “I know you have had to been scared and have gone through a lot, but what in the hell were you thinking!”

  What Kylee was saying made sense, but she wasn’t in my shoes. I could say that I would have spoken up if I was Kayla when her whole nightmare first started, but looking at my life now, I now know differently.

  “Ky, I know this is hard to understand. Hell it’s hard to explain, to put into words but here is the thing. You can say a lot when you aren’t walking in those shoes. It was the best decision I’ve made. Look how everyone fell when Kayla spoke up and then when Colleen and Carson had their shit going on,” I shrug.

  “We may have been worried and hurt, but we also pulled together Mary. That’s what family does when one of them is in trouble. They share the burden so you can breathe. We can fight when you’re weak Mare. Look, he’s broke your arm. How much more damage has he done that you’ve told no one about?”

  Dropping my head, I whispered, “I told Nate. He helped me.”

  She withdrew her hands. “You trusted Nate over us?”

  “It’s not that I trusted him over you guys, but more that I didn’t want you all to see me like I was. Besides, when I was better he gave me something I couldn’t get anywhere else.” I smirked at her.

  Kylee smirked back then slapped me. “This isn’t funny, Mare.”

  “I just don’t want to talk about it anymore. I just wanted you to know. Can we eat?”

  Reaching for a slice of the chicken bacon ranch pizza, Kylee laughs grabs a slice and starts talking about her design business. I was proud of her. Since her granduation, she’s started a business and it’s doing very well. There was no one more happy for her than me. She’s amassed so much in her time and living her dream. I’m very proud of her.

  “So, Tobey’s good-looking. Really cares about you too. That man was tore up when you were taken to the hospital. We all kept trying to calm him down, but he wouldn’t until he was with you.” She said before she took a bite.

  “I don’t know if I’ll stay with him,” I said quietly.

  This causes her to freeze mid-bite and stare at me. “Um honey, this is something you should have decided before moving in with him.” Kylee sets her piece back in the box and looks at me. “Why can’t you stay with him?”

  So I explain to her what happened last night and I also explained more of the things that happened with Kyle. Then I felt the need to explain how everything has gone between Tobey and I thus far. For some ungodly reason, I also told her about Nate.

  “Honestly Ky, I’m not so sure I’m meant to be with anyone. What if this is what I do? Every time a voice is raised or a fight starts I panic and run. I can’t do that to Tobey. He’s too great of a guy. He deserves better than some flake with a past.” Not hungry anymore, I toss my half eaten piece of pizza in the box sit back on the couch resting my head on the back.

  “Okay listen Mare. I’m going to tell you the same thing I told Kayla when she was having a panic moment before she got married. Honestly I’m surprised that I’m the only one that thought of this. You need to seek help. Professionally. This kind of stuff is hard not only physically, but emotionally as well. The thing with emotional abuse is that it doesn’t heal as quickly as the physical portion. Don’t give up on Tobey yet. Try and see a doctor who specializes in treatment for abused victims, then if after working with them – even taking Tobey along would be good too – you still feel this way then address it. Mare, I honestly think that right now you are not thinking clearly. You’re still clouded with all the negative thoughts from dumbass that you are acting on how he sees you and not how you are or even how Tobey sees you.”

  Therapy? Could I do the whole therapy route?

  “Thank you Kylee. When did you get so smart?” I tease.

  “Oh about the time you started listening to me.” She joked right back.

  We joked and talked until Nick came down rubbing his eyes, staggering into the kitchen. My guess is he forgot I was here or for that matter that
Kylee came over. We cleared our throats and Nick froze.

  Side stepping, he moved behind the counter then turned and faced us. “Fuck, I, uh, forgot you were here. Ky, you’re still here,” he groaned.

  Kylee and I looked at each other and fell into a fit of giggles.

  “That was obvious with the moon we just saw in the daylight.”

  “Thank God it was just the back view,” Kylee finished.

  He growled. “Can you two turn around so I can go up and get dressed?”

  We put our hands over our eyes and can hear his bare feet padding across the wooden floors. When we hear his door shut, we fall back onto the couch laughing.

  “Can you two stop being asses and one of you start coffee?” Nick yelled from his room.

  Kylee decided it was time for her to head home, so I walked into the kitchen to make his coffee and start his breakfast. By the time I had breakfast finished, he came strolling in freshly showered (and dressed!).

  “Oh you’re a godsend. Thank you for breakfast.”

  I watch as he eats and I can’t help but ask. “Are you okay?”

  “No, but there’s nothing I can do about it. Whatever reason she has, she felt overpowered any opinion I had on it.” He looked up at me with the most heartbreaking look on his face. “I’m not sure I’ll ever get over her. Jennifer was different. She’s the only woman that has ever, just calmed me and-” He shook his head.

  Walking around the counter, I hug him and he returns it. “You are a great guy and you are perfect together. I strongly believe she’ll be back. Maybe something scared her.” I added sadly.

  He pulled back. “Is that why you’re here? Something scare you?”

  I nodded my head. “I’m going to get some sleep then I’ll get out of your hair.”

  He smiled kissed my cheek. “No rush. I love having you around, always have.”

  Turning I started to walk out of the kitchen, when I hear him yell. “I see how it is be all sweet and caring then leave me to clean up.” He joked.

  “Love you Nicky!” I yelled back sweetly.

  Once upstairs, I sat on the bed and thought about everything Kylee said to me and then what Nick is going through with Jennifer. Maybe what Nick said had a point. Maybe I was making a decision that both Tobey and I should be discussing together.

  Laying down, I fell asleep the minute my head hit the pillow.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Tobey

  It was one hell of a night. I didn’t sleep a wink. All I kept playing over and over in my head was ‘she didn’t know’. She didn’t know if she was going to come home. I let my temper get the best of me with Scott. It was never my intent to scare her like that. Scott wouldn’t shut the hell up! To keep from hurting my best friend – practically brother – I threw the chair to get into his thick skull that I was pissed he went there.

  When I had searched everywhere for her, then seeing her truck gone, I came back far more pissed off than when I left. Flying over to Scott’s place, I let myself in, dragged his ass out of bed and threw him outside.

  “You can get your ass off my property! You’re fired!”

  Looking shocked and more sober than before, “What? What is going on?” Scott asked as he frantically clambered to his feet.

  “The last person I thought would betray me was you. I’ve been there for you through thick and thin. I was there when you had no one.” I ended sadly.

  Scott looked lost. “What is going on?”

  “Mary left because of the stunt you pulled tonight!”

  Scott winced at the tone in my voice. “Man, I’m sorry.”

  Punching him in the stomach, “You’re sorry?” I hiss. “You’re sorry? You think that fixes things? That it brings Mary back? What the hell was that even about?”

  “I- I don’t know. I was drunk and,” he dropped his head, “and maybe a little jealous.”

  Throwing my hands up in the air, “You’re un-fucking-believable!”

  Storming off, Scott tried to get my attention, but I ignored him. He was jealous of what? Seriously, sometimes I wonder if he was a chick trapped in a man’s body. What man ever says I started a fight between you and your woman because I was jealous. Rolling my eyes, I storm inside.

  Then the texts came in making matters worse. Before I knew it the sun was coming up. Beyond exhausted, I staggered out of the house to get started. With Scott no longer working on the ranch, it was going to be one hellacious day of work.

  I had just finished cleaning the stalls when the guys walked in, with Scott. Irritated from my loss of sleep, I moved right over to Scott punching him without hesitation. He crumpled to the ground holding his face, but said nothing beyond the ‘umph’ as he hit the ground. The guys rush me.

  “Dude!” exclaims Joel.

  “What the fuck, brother!” John yells.

  “Are you on your period?” Harry half jokes.

  Scott slowly pulled himself off the ground and stood. Staggering a bit backwards, he looked at me, but didn’t try to defend himself or retaliate.

  “I fired you! Why are you here?” I huff.

  All the guys turned to me shocked. They know how close Scott and I were so I know my saying this not only shocked them but had them worried.

  “I,” he wiped blood from his mouth and spit on the ground. “I came to talk. I’d hoped after you got some sleep you’d change your mind.”

  “Sleep? You think I got sleep last night! She’s gone Scott and according to her text last night, she doesn’t know if she’s coming back. Happy now!” I shouldered past Scott and rounded the barn toward my horse.

  Riding off, I headed straight for Mary’s land. Since she moved in with me, I always make sure I patrol her property and make sure everything is safe and in order. Jumping down from my horse, I stand at the base of her steps. The last image I have here was imbedded in my head and I’m not sure it will ever disappear.

  My boots clunk up the steps as the old worn out boards beneath my feet groaned and creaked with my weight. Sliding the key in the door, then walking in, I remember our nights here. It may be a small house, but it was cozy and it felt like home. I turn and look into the living room at the fireplace.

  “Tobey!” Mary yelled.

  A smile crept across my face as the memory filled my vision and played before me.

  “Yeah?” I walked up behind her.

  She was shivering. “I can’t get this damn fire to stay lit. I’m freezing.”

  Bending down, I get the fire going in no time. “There you go babe. Just needs a bit of breathing room is all.” I explain standing up.

  When I looked at her, the light of the fire dancing over her face, my heart skipped a beat. After being screwed over the way I had been, I never thought I’d not only trust a woman again but love her too. When I looked at Mary, I’ve never felt more whole in my life.

  Reaching out, I took her hand and pulled her to me. Wrapping one arm around her waist, I held her hand to my chest with the other. We began to sway.

  “What are you doing?” She chuckles.

  “Dancing with the love of my life,” I whisper.

  Pressing my cheek to hers, I began to hum a tune. Not long later, I heard her sigh. I hummed a little louder before I knew it I found myself singing to her softly looking her right in the eyes. Heart to heart, I sang to her.

  “I finally found the reason. I finally found the reason that I’m here today. I finally found the reason I always pushed love away. I finally found the reason that I love you so much. Yeah. I finally found the reason inside of you. Oh my reason is you.”

  A tear slowly trailed from her eye to her chin before dropping to our joined hands. Another tear followed and then another.

  “Hey,” I brush the next tear away. “What’s wrong?”

  “That,” she took a shaky breath. “That was- That was a beautiful song. You never said you could sing. Who wrote that song?”

  Looking down, I became conscious of what I just did. I just sang to a si
nger. For the first time in my life, I could feel the heat of a blush staining my cheeks.

  “My father wrote that for my mom. At the end of every day, he’d sing it to her. I loved watching how in love they were.”

  She gasped. “What made you sing it to me?” She whispered quietly.

  Shrugging, “I looked at you in the light of the fire… It just came to me.” I said ending on another shrug.

  “That was-”

  She didn’t even finish her sentence. Instead, she leaned up and kissed me. The kiss was loving and passionate. I could taste the tears on her lips. Releasing her hand, I wrapped her fully in my arms, holding her tightly against me.

  We made love right there in front of the fireplace. It was the best night of my life. Of course we had many nights of making love, but that night was something special. It was unlike any other time before or after.

  God I missed her.

  Walking around the rest of the house, I made sure nothing was out of place. Locking up, I walked to the barn next making sure nothing was out of place there. The barn did need a lot of work, but it was still in decent shape. She could definitely run a decent ranch here.

  Walking back out, I jumped up on my horse and road the surrounding property. It was just after lunch when I arrived back at the ranch. Brushing him down, placing a bucket of feed then making sure the water was good, I head out of the barn. Just about to the steps when I hear…

  “Tobey?”

  My head snaps in the direction of the voice and I freeze. Staring dumbfounded at Mary, I almost don’t believe she’s there. For a moment there, I couldn’t speak or move – hell I could barely breathe. I was afraid to blink for fear it would cause her to disappear all together.

  “Tobey we need to talk. I-”

  By this time, I had found the ability to move and I practically ran to where she stood. Scooping her up in my arms, I turn and head toward the house.

  “Tobey! What are you doing?” She shrieked wrapping her arms around my neck.