Keeping Secrets (The Essien Trilogy, #1)

by Kiru Taye

  “So if it isn’t that, what is it?”

  “Felix, I....”

  He suddenly stood rock still, his hands frozen mid-air as he reached for her. His eyes darkened, his skin draining of blood as he seemed to make a realisation.

  “Are you pregnant?”

  Chapter Ten

  Felix watched Ebony as she blanched and gripped the sink tighter. Overtaken by a mixed feeling of disgust and anguish, he felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest when he saw her nod. He was right. She was pregnant. She looked pale. He should pull her closer just in case she fell, but he couldn’t move his limbs for some reason.

  “And you let me touch you,” he gritted out, his fists clenched beside his body. An image of all the things he’d done to her body flashed in his mind, sickening him. He couldn’t bear to look at her, so he turned and walked out of the bathroom.

  “Felix, please let me explain.”

  He heard her stricken voice behind him but he didn’t turn to look at her. Neither did he stop. Instead, he picked up his shirt and walked out of the hut.

  He walked along the beach, pain twisting his stomach in knots. Ebony, pregnant. Why had she let him touch her? He’d used no protection. She being his wife, he’d assumed no reason for them to have a barrier between them. Yet, there existed another life growing inside her.

  Did she still love her ex-fiancé? Did she want him back? She’d told him they hadn’t had a wedding night. He’d assumed that meant they hadn’t made love previously. Had yesterday been the first time they’d had sex? Surely, she would have told him if the child was his? She wouldn’t have hidden this from him.

  He turned and went back towards the hut. He had to find out the truth once and for all. He just didn’t know what he would do if the child wasn’t his. If she’d been with someone else in such a short time before their wedding. Could this be linked to why they didn’t have a wedding night?

  He walked into the bedroom and saw her sitting on the bed, her head in her hands. He yearned to go to her and pick her up in his arms. But he decided against it. He needed a clear head to think without the distractions of her soft body against him. Instead, he pulled up a chair and sat astride it, facing her. He wanted to see her face when she answered his questions.

  “How long have you known about the pregnancy?” The words out of his mouth were hollow and forced, but they came out, anyway.

  She lifted her head up. There were no tears in her eyes. Instead, they had a fire in them, a determination he hadn’t seen before.

  “Yesterday morning. I’d been throwing up for a few days, but it’s only yesterday that I suspected it could be something other than an upset tummy. So I bought the kit and did the test at Faith’s house. It turned out positive.”

  It all clicked together. All her cloak and dagger movements yesterday morning. A thought occurred to him. Since she hadn’t talked to him about the pregnancy, she would have told her ex. Right now, he hated the fact he couldn’t remember all the events leading up to their marriage. Would he have still married Ebony if he’d know she could be carrying someone else’s child?

  “Do you want him back? Does he know?” It hurt to ask, but he had to know.

  “Does who know?” She looked at him, her eyes widened in confusion.

  “The father of the child. You ex-fiancé, I presume.”

  “You think I’ve been with someone else? What kind of person do you think I am?” Her brown eyes flashed at him furiously. “There’s been no one else since you.”

  His disdainful laugh echoed off the wooden walls. “Unless you are about to tell me that by some miracle of nature, my sperm has been so effective that you have conceived in under twenty-four hours, I would suggest quite adamantly that someone else is involved. So much for trying to give you the benefit of the doubt.”

  He stood up, disgust and anger bubbling in his veins, and stepped away from the chair.

  “For your information, Lord High and Mighty, yesterday wasn’t the first time we slept together.”

  Every fibre in his body froze at her contemptuous words and he glared at her.

  “What are you saying?”

  “We made love on the night of the Governor’s ball in Calabar two weeks before we got married.”

  The day before the Governor’s Christmas Ball.

  Felix and Ebony arrived together in Calabar for the Governor’s Charity Ball, an annual event the Essiens had been attending for years. Calabar was the Essiens’ hometown and they enjoyed a status close to royalty as their family line could be traced back generations to the earliest settlers on the estuary. Felix also served as the patron to several local charities and a major sponsor for the event that formed a key fundraising event in the social calendar.

  It would be the first major event that Felix and Ebony would attend together since they formally announced their engagement. Ebony caught a late flight in from Abuja where she had been working on the International Trade project for the organisation her mother was setting up. Felix, whose Lagos flight had only arrived a few minutes before hers, picked her up from the airport lobby and they sat in the car together for the drive to his gated waterside house on the creek marina.

  “Wow.” Her first word as she stared at the beautiful, six-bed, neo-Georgian style modern house set on three levels, with a boat moored at the marina. She’d thought his Lagos mansion impressive, but for a holiday home, this waterside house represented the epitome of understated elegance.

  “Did you decorate this house yourself?” she wondered out loud after he’d introduced her to the housekeeper. They sat out on the balcony overlooking the marina.

  “I used an interior designer. I just told her what I liked and she did the rest.” He shrugged as if it was no big deal.

  “She did a very good job. You have a lovely home.”

  “It is your home, too, now.” He took her hand and kissed her palm. “Let me show you to your room so you can freshen up for dinner.”

  His words filled her with a mix of anxiety and disappointment. Felix was only fulfilling his part by keeping to a condition she’d set out. Since the day she’d agreed to marry him, he hadn’t done anything more that kissing her lightly. She should have been happy but somehow, it left her with a longing to be held in his arms and thoroughly kissed.

  She followed him up the grand staircase to a landing that had another informal sitting room and three bedrooms with en suite facilities leading off the hallway.

  “This is your room.” He opened one of the bedroom doors. “And mine is just over there.” He pointed to the door across the hall. “I’ll leave you to freshen up.” And he walked off.

  The room turned out large and tastefully decorated, with cream walls and cool, pastel furnishings. Her luggage had already been unpacked, her clothes hung. They dined together that evening. With Ebony barely able to keep her eyes open afterwards due to fatigue, Felix escorted her to her room and gave her a brief kiss just outside her door.

  The next day after breakfast, they visited several of the charities Felix was the patron. First, they checked out the local hospital to open a new maternity wing which the Essien foundation had built. The press photographers were there and Ebony felt uneasy having the flash bulbs going off in her face. But she kept her smile up. Sensing her discomfort, Felix pulled her closer, whispering into her ear, “keep smiling. It’ll soon be over.” She was glad when they finally left the hospital.

  At the orphanage, no media followed them, no cameras. Ebony felt so touched by the children. She played with them, and one particular child tugged at her heart. A little girl, about two years old. Cradling the toddler in her arms, she remembered Felix’s unwavering insistence that he didn’t want any children. A wave of sadness hit her.

  She watched Felix playing a game of football with the children. He looked so relaxed with them. So confident. Surely, he would make a great parent. When he noticed her look of melancholy, he stopped and watched her with an odd expression of his face, one she cou
ldn’t decipher.

  Later, dressed in jeans and t-shirt, they had visited the local market. Ebony loved the colour, smell, and vibrancy of the environment, the different stalls displaying varied wares, from fresh food produce to beautiful, hand-made jewellery and colourful print fabrics. The market men and women gesticulated and called out to them to buy their wares as they strode past.

  She stopped at a stall displaying different items made from coral beads. Curious, she picked a string of waist beads and asked the market seller woman what they were for.

  “They are for young maidens. It makes them irresistible to their betrothed and helps with fertility,” the woman replied with enthusiasm.

  “Oh,” Ebony said, heat travelling up her face in embarrassment. Not that she believed in the superstition, anyway. She glanced at Felix but his face remained blank.

  “This one will work well for you. With it, your betrothed will be unable to resist you on your wedding night. Here, I’ll wrap it up for you,” the woman encouraged.

  Ebony shook her head vehemently. “No, thanks.” She walked away from the stall. What would be the point in kidding herself? Felix was never going to look at her that way.

  They walked back to the car.

  “I forgot something back there,” he said when she got into the car. “I won’t be long.”

  Ebony sat in the car and checked her phone messages. One came from the wedding planner, getting back to her about the change of flowers for the reception venue. Ebony sent her a reply. Felix got back soon after that and they returned to his house.

  For the governor’s ball, she dressed in a sleeveless, coral print, silk maxi dress. A stylist had come in earlier to arrange her hair in a fashionable up do. She carried on finishing her make-up when a knock came on the bedroom door.

  Felix walked in. He looked amazing in a black velvet tuxedo, black satin waistcoat, white shirt, and black tie. Her breath caught in her throat and her heart rate increased tenfold. Under his intense scrutiny, her skin mottled with heat and goose bumps. She stood mesmerised, unable to take her eyes away from him.

  “You take my breath away, ima-mmi.”

  He kissed her gently, reverently. She melted on the spot. Stepping back, he held up a medium-sized box.

  “I’ve got something for you.” He opened the case. Inside sat the most beautiful piece of jewellery made of diamond and yellow topaz stones set in gold necklace and matching earrings.

  She gasped. “They are beautiful. You shouldn’t have.... Thank you.”

  “You are beautiful and you deserve beautiful things. When I saw them, they reminded me of your eyes. I want you to wear these tonight. Let me help you put them on.”

  He opened the clasp of the necklace and turned her so she faced the mirror again. He put the necklace against her skin, closing the clasp at the back of her neck.

  “Gosh. I don’t know what to say. I feel guilty as I don’t have a gift for you.”

  “You agreed to marry me. That’s all the gift I need. I have to confess I have another gift for you.” He took out a paper bag from his pocket. “I know it doesn’t have the same value of the necklace or earrings, but I found myself drawn to it as much as I hope you were.”

  She took the bag and opened it. It contained the stringed, coral waist beads she’d seen earlier in the local market. Warm sensation swirled in her belly, and her heart leapt with joy. He cared enough to have gone back to buy it for her.

  “It’s the best gift ever,” she said happily. When she saw his raised eyebrow, she laughed. “Seriously, you don’t know what this means to me.” She gave him a brief hug. “Thank you. I think we better go before I start smearing my mascara all over you.” She sniffed.

  Laughing, he took her hand and escorted her downstairs to the car.

  At the ball, Felix proved very attentive, never leaving her alone for too long. The event was filled with socialites. She’d forgotten how these nights could get. As a teenager, she had attended a few similar events when her father was alive. His work meant that he got invited to such happenings frequently, and on occasion, she’d had the opportunity to attend them. They were filled with Nigeria’s political elite and high rollers from the business world. And of course, there were always glamorous women showcasing the latest fashion styles and outfits. Suddenly, she understood why Felix had bought her the jewellery. They certainly didn’t look out of place in the glitz and glamour of the ball.

  Felix seemed to know a few of the ladies at the event by name. Warily, she wondered at his relationship with them. He had just handed her a glass of champagne when a tall, slim woman dressed in a black dress that clung to her body and left little to the imagination stepped up to him.

  “Felix, darling. I was hoping to see you here tonight. It’s been a long time.” The woman moved closer to him provocatively and kissed him on the lips.

  “Hi, Helen.” He stepped back, immediately putting some space between his body and the woman’s. “I’d like you to meet my fiancée, Ebony.” He put his hand on Ebony’s waist in a proprietary gesture.

  Helen looked her up and down before turning back to Felix, putting her hands on his chest.

  “Nice to meet you, Helen,” Ebony said, but she didn’t extend her hand. She wanted no contact with the woman who already got on her nerves.

  “I did hear a rumour about your engagement but couldn’t believe it. You know we shouldn’t always believe what we read in the press, right?” She winked at him. “I never thought I’d see the day any woman would snare you. Well, I hope she has what it takes to keep you satisfied.”

  Ebony’s spine stiffened in anger. She would have taken a step forward if Felix hadn’t been holding her close. For the first time in her life, she wanted to scratch out the eyes of a fellow woman.

  “We are perfectly happy. Thanks for your concern, Helen,” Felix replied, his tone nonchalant.

  This made Ebony angrier. How could he be so calm when the other woman had practically insulted her?

  “Oh, well. If you ever need me, you have my number. Call me.” With that, Helen sashayed away.

  Ebony moved away from Felix, walking out onto one of the balconies. He followed her.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked with a tone of irritation.

  She rounded on him. “I can’t believe you stood there and let that woman talk to me like that.”

  “I can’t believe you fell for her jibe. She was just trying to rile you. I thought you were stronger than that.”

  “Oh, so now it’s my fault. Well, thank you very much.” She turned her back to him. How dare he tell her she ought to be stronger? Of course, she was stronger. She would have punched the daylights out of the nasty woman, too.

  “Look, she is the daughter of one of our bank’s biggest clients. I have to keep her sweet. She’s harmless.”

  She turned round again to face him. “I wonder what else you have to do to keep her sweet,” she retorted with disdain.

  Felix’s eyes narrowed into slits. A muscle ticked on his temple. “What do you mean by that?” He grabbed her arm.

  Ebony glared at him. She tried to pull back her arm but he didn’t let go.

  “So your business is more important than I am,” she spat out angrily.

  “Oh, come on, Ebony. You’re the one who doesn’t want any emotional involvement, remember? We’re getting married because of the business. Of course, it’s important.” His voice thrummed low and dangerous.

  He had a point. She didn’t want a relationship. That’s what she’d told him. He wasn’t marrying her to love and cherish her. It would be purely a business deal to secure his position at Apex Private Bank. She needed to remember it and get used to it. So why did she feel so fragile, so disappointed that she didn’t mean more to him?

  “Fine. I’d like to go home now. I’m tired.” She knew she was sulking but didn’t care. The last thing she wanted was to go back into that ballroom and watch all those women he’d probably made love with. One thing he wasn’t going to do wit
h her.

  He looked at her in silence for a while.

  “Fine. We’ll bid our farewells.”

  After saying goodbye to the host and hostess, they left the ball. In the car, they sat in silence for the short journey back to Felix’s house.

  “I’m tired, so I’ll go straight to bed,” she said to him when they got inside.

  “Good night, Ebony.”

  Felix walked into the sitting room and she went upstairs. She undressed and ran a bath, filling it with the bath crystals she found in the bathroom. It smelt of blackberries, bergamot, and vanilla orchid.

  As she lay back in the relaxing, soothing foams, she pondered upon the day’s events. The visit to the orphanage where Felix had seemed at home with the children sat uppermost in her mind. He had played jovially with the kids, kicking about with the new footballs he’d bought them, letting the younger ones take a ride on his back. She hadn’t believed it could be the same cool and sophisticated man she knew in Lagos who went to elite bars and drove low-slung, fast cars. To see him playing so freely with the children had been at odds with his wish not to have any.

  She rubbed her hand against her tummy and wondered what it would be like to have a child with Felix. If he ever changed his mind, she’d want to be the mother of his children. She wanted him. Now more than ever. She wanted to connect with him. To taste him, feel his essence surround her.

  She’d asked for no sex in their marriage. Felix had agreed. So there certainly wouldn’t be any kids. Unless she told him she’d changed her mind.

  She didn’t want other women providing for his needs, giving and receiving pleasure with him. She didn’t want women like Helen Douglas thinking they could get their hands on her man. Felix was hers, at least for the next two years. She would ensure it stayed that way.

  Feeling emboldened, Ebony got out of the bath and tied on the bathrobe. She put on the waist beads Felix had given her earlier, letting them hang on her hips. This would be as good a time to test their potency. The market woman had claimed they would make her irresistible to her betrothed. Well, that would be Felix, and she needed all the help she could get to seduce him. She took off the bathrobe and put on her short silk robe, instead. Taking a few deep breaths to shore up her courage, she walked out of her room and knocked on Felix’s bedroom door.