Dark Matter (Interchron Book 3)

by Liesel K. Hill

  Lila raised an eyebrow. “Are you saying this is a neurochemical ability?”

  Doc looked doubtful. “Not necessarily. Rather just a way you two can work together and make one another stronger, if that is in fact what’s happening. It’s rare to find a perfect match to complement your brain power. Think of it this way: if Jonah is injured and pushing through pain, you can give him strength to do that. It’s an advantage. And it should be reciprocal. I encourage the two of you to explore it on your own time. It doesn’t appear to be dangerous. Quite the opposite. But this jam Jonah is dealing with is something else.”

  He stared at Jonah until Jonah found himself shrugging uncomfortably.

  “Lila,” Doc said, “go find Marcus. I’d like him to weigh in on this. This may be the result of an injury I don’t have the skills to pinpoint.”

  Lila nodded, cast a worried look toward Jonah, then headed for the door.

  Doc looked down at him curiously. “Did you get the door open? See what lay beyond it?”

  Lila reached the door but paused and looked back, awaiting Jonah’s answer.

  “Balloons,” he said. “A wall of green balloons.”

  Chapter 13: Fear and Bone

  A heavy, yet tranquil silence blanketed the corridors of Interchron. Jonah ghosted silently through them, his feet whispering through the sand-carpeted corridors like a phantom. He hadn’t been able to sleep, and finally gave up after several hours.

  After half an hour of wandering, he found himself making his way toward what Maggie called the Canyon Room. She’d taken him there not long after they’d arrived at Interchron. Basically a room with slim walkways around the perimeter that fell away into a black void, it always had cool wind rushing through it. Maggie explained the wind came up from a canyon far below that the people of Interchron had never gotten around to exploring.

  Jonah immediately understood why she liked it. It felt peaceful to sit on the precipice of a drop that couldn’t be fully seen. The cool wind coming up through the underground canyon felt refreshing.

  Jonah didn't know why he went there, other than it being a somewhat familiar place for him. In truth, he needed to think, and his quarters felt small and stifling. He felt self-conscious walking the corridors of Interchron this time of night, passing the dark, quiet rooms of people he didn't know well. This seemed like a good alternative. If he’d had his way, he’d have gone out onto the slopes of the mountain to ponder, but nobody would let him out this time of night, and certainly not by himself.

  He'd expected the Canyon Room to be utterly dark. When Maggie brought him before, she’d pulled a rock out of a storage space and pulled light through it before entering. Jonah couldn’t do any such thing, so he’d brought a flashlight from his room. Yet, when he approached the entrance to the Canyon Room, light came from it. Jonah wondered if Maggie could already be here.

  Jonah stepped through the doorway of the Canyon Room and shut his eyes, letting the refreshing wind blow his short, auburn hair back off his face. He didn’t see anyone else, but the same rock Maggie had used last time sat on the ground by the door. Dim, bluish light emanated from it. Perhaps someone had been here earlier and left the lantern behind. Jonah crossed to a wall and slid down the cool rock wall until his backside met soft sand, and pulled his knees into his chest.

  "Can't sleep?"

  Jonah jumped at the feminine voice.

  "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you." Lila rose from a shadowy niche twelve feet away.

  "No, I couldn't. You either?"

  "No. I often come here to think when I can't sleep."

  Jonah nodded. "That’s why I'm here to."

  Lila walked toward him across the room, then paused. "If you want to be alone, I’ll leave you to it."

  Jonah considered for half a second before shaking his head. "No. My room just felt claustrophobic. I wouldn't mind the company."

  Nodding, Lila came to stand beside him and slid down the wall so they sat side by side. She pulled her knees into her chest, as he had. "Well, I know why I can't sleep. Why can't you?"

  Jonah breathed deeply, not sure how to answer.

  "You know what? Don't answer that. I guess it's not hard to guess why you can't sleep either."

  Jonah studied the dull rock walls around them. "It's so strange, Lila. You know, I've never questioned any of it. My life, who I am, what it all means."

  “And now you do?" Lila asked.

  "Then Vegas happened."

  Lila, studying him, looking mildly confused. "Maggie said you moved past it pretty quickly. She had a hard time, because she felt the loss of Marcus, and didn't know what it meant. She said you had an easier time, which makes sense because you didn’t come here and meet anyone like she did."

  Jonah leaned his head back against the cool cavern wall. "I did move past it pretty quickly. I think part of me just didn’t want to drag it out. Not that I didn't want to know what happened, but we got to a point where we didn't think we’d ever know for certain. We might as well move on with our lives. I thought it would be the healthy thing. Maybe it was denial. I won't say I felt an emptiness, as Maggie did. But ever since, something has seemed off. I've never been able to put my finger on what it is. Quite frankly, I never tried to understand it. It scared me too much."

  "That's perfectly understandable,” Lila said quietly. “Maybe now is the time for answers. Maybe this memory you’re blocking has something to do with it."

  "Maybe," Jonah nodded. "All I know right now is I want to be here for Maggie, and for the team, to help out any way I can."

  “I get it, Jonah,” Lila said softly. “Welcome to my world. I just want to be helpful to the team. Somehow, I always end up right here. Searching for a way to help, worrying about the future.” She barked a mirthless laugh. “Or just waiting for them to come back. Hoping they all do.”

  Her words twisted Jonah’s guts into knots. Rubbing his face vigorously with his hands, he asked, “How do you deal with this all the time?”

  “Way of life. You have to deal, so you just do.” She shrugged, then looked away again, letting her eyes sweep over the precipice of the canyon.

  Jonah took the opportunity to study her. Her features, though softer than Joan’s, looked so much like her mother as to make the relation unmistakable. Her dark hair was longer than Joan’s, though, brushing just beneath her shoulder while Joan kept hers bobbed.

  Lila shrugged and glanced his way without actually looking at him. He realized he’d been staring at her.

  He cleared his throat. “But they don’t always come back, do they?”

  Lila frowned. “Sure they do.”

  “What about Clay?” The words were out of his mouth almost before he thought of them, and he immediately regretted speaking. He’d never known Clay, but Lila and the others did. Jonah could tell the entire team—including Maggie—still felt his loss keenly because of the pain in their faces when they spoke of him.

  He glanced over in time to see Lila swallow. A tension that hadn’t been there a moment ago took up residence around her eyes and mouth.

  “Lila, I didn’t mean for it to sound—”

  “It’s okay, Jonah. I get it. I went to medical when they brought Clay back. He was unconscious. My dad died fighting Arachnimen when I was just a kid. Every time the team goes out, the fear of losing them twists my insides into knots.” She looked over at him.

  “You just ignore it?”

  She shrugged. “Or tell it to go to hell.” She opened her mouth as if to say more. Instead, she gave him a sad smile, then gazed out into the darkness again.

  Jonah reached over and covered her hand in his. After a moment, she lifted her fingers from her knee and laced them through his.

  “Lately,” Lila murmured, “I have this feeling that what’s coming will require everybody's help. Everyone in Interchron, including us."

  “Are we ready, do you think?” Jonah asked quietly.

  Lila gave him a don’t-be-stupid look.

  “What
?” he asked.

  “I was born ready.”

  Jonah chuckled, amused. “Yeah?”

  “Yeah. Most of my life consists of being afraid of being left out. Or behind. Like you said, I just want to be of some use.”

  "I'm sure you're ready," Jonah answered. "But I’m not.”

  She raised a questioning eyebrow at him.

  “I need to get this memory figured out, Lila," he scrubbed a hand back through his hair. "Until I do. I feel like I have this handicap. I’ll be in the way. Maybe even a liability."

  "I understand," Lila said soothingly.

  Jonah spun on his butt in sand, so he faced her and took her hands. Her eyebrows jumped in surprise.

  "Help me, Lila."

  "How?"

  "Let’s run through the memory again. I want to give it another try."

  Lila’s spine stiffened with obvious reluctance. "Oh…I don’t know if that’s a good idea."

  "I need to figure this out. You know how to do it. You heard what Doc said. If he had more time, he’d do it himself. There's so much going on, he can’t focus on it. I get it. This has to do with me, specifically. Not the rest of the team. Not the rest of humanity. It's not a priority, and it shouldn't be. But I need to figure this out. Please, help me."

  "It caused you pain, Jonah."

  "It’s not anything I can’t handle. You can monitor the pain, as Doc did. If it gets to be too intense, we’ll stop. I promise. I won’t put up a fight. Can we try? Please?”

  Lila still looked unsure. After a moment, she nodded. "Okay."

  Twenty minutes later, Jonah sat in the same seat, in the same room they’d used the first time. As before, Lila stared down at her computer. Jonah tried not to fidget while he waited for her to set up. After what seemed like hours, she sucked in a deep breath.

  “Okay, almost ready. Give me two more minutes for the sequence to boot up." She turned her body to face him, rather than the computer screen. "Jonah, you shouldn’t let this whole thing freak you out too much." Lila leaned her forearms on her knees, and searched the ground, as if looking for the right words. "I know this feels like a big deal. I'm sure it is, for you. As you said earlier, this is about you. It's personal. I mean, of course it is. It's a memory from your head. Specifically, because it seems to have something to do with your childhood, it may be something that felt big to you as a child. As an adult, it may not be such a big deal."

  "Okay," Jonah said uncertainly. "What do you mean?"

  "Everything feels like a big deal when you're a little kid. Everything good feels like the most exciting thing in the universe. Anything negative feels like the end of the world. Sometimes kids do things they have shame over, but really, they’re not a big deal. A part of growing up. I'm wondering if this is something like that for you. Don't get me wrong, we still need to work through it if you want to touch your neurochemical abilities, but I can tell it's stressing you out. Don't let it. All you need to do is relax and let it come."

  Jonah studied Lila's face, reading between the lines of her words more than he probably should have.

  She raised her eyes to look at him. "What?"

  "What did you do as a kid you’re ashamed of?"

  Lila immediately straightened her spine and scrutinized her computer screen. "This isn’t about me."

  Jonah put his hands up in surrender. “Sorry, didn't mean to pry."

  Lila sighed and slumped, as if all the air had gone out of her. "You didn't. I suppose I opened myself right up for that one." She swiveled from her computer again to face him. "When I was a little girl, five years old, something happened. You know how I can Heal bone but not much else?"

  Jonah nodded.

  "I'm not truly a Healer. I mean, I am, but most people can Heal anything. The fact that I can only Heal bone isn't…usual. It's not like there's a whole bunch of other people who specifically only Heal bone."

  "Why is it that way for you?" Jonah asked.

  "It's tied to a specific ability I have," Lila said. “It's not so much that I can Heal bone, although that's part of it. I can manipulate bone tissue in general."

  "Oh…kay," Jonah said, when she didn't go on right away.

  Lila shook herself, as if stepping out of a memory. "A boy named Jason Tucker, a year or two older than me, lived at Interchron back then. He started bullying me. At first, I got upset and cried. When my dad cornered me, I told him what happened. He said he’d talk to the boy’s parents. I didn't want him to. Even then, I knew my dad fought Arachnimen and my mom was part of the prophecy. I wanted to be a grown up. To fight my own battles. My father seemed to understand. He told me to stand up to this boy, to not let him push me around. To get angry, not sad. The next time it happened, I tried."

  She rested her elbow on the table next to the computer console and leaned her head against her fist, obviously lost in memory. "As an adult, I can understand the psychology of it. When I first pushed back, he pushed harder. If I'd continued to stand up to him, he would’ve backed down eventually. That day, he pushed harder and it got worse. He took my doll." Lila smiled, a reminiscent smile tinged with embarrassment at what had been important to her as a child.

  Jonah smiled back.

  "My father made that doll for me. It was my favorite thing in the world. Jason took it and wouldn’t give it back. He held it above his head so I couldn't reach it. While trying to get it, I grabbed hold of his other wrist, trying to pull him toward me so I could reach doll. It didn’t work. He was taller and stronger than me and it pissed me off." Lila stopped and dropped her eyes to the ground.

  Jonah leaned forward, genuinely curious to hear about the ‘shame’ she’d mentioned earlier.

  "I...broke his wrist."

  Jonah's eyebrows jumped. "You were strong enough to break his wrist?"

  Lila shook her head. “No, I didn't do it physically. I did it neurochemically."

  Understanding filled Jonah's chest. "Because you can manipulate bone."

  Lila nodded. "I can snap it as easily as I can Heal it. That's the only reason I can Heal it at all. I can’t Heal other kinds of matter nearly as well because bone is the only kind I can manipulate." She looked vaguely self-conscious.

  "Well, the little bastard deserved it,” Jonah muttered. “He shouldn’t have bullied you."

  Lila chuckled and gave him a don’t-be-stupid look. Jonah smiled at her smile.

  "We were kids, Jonah. Neither of us deserved any such thing.

  "So…what happened? John asked.

  "Naturally he started screaming. Parents were called.” She shrugged. “We worked it out. I cried for three days.”

  The smile slid off Jonah’s face. “Did it make you afraid to use the ability?”

  “Yes and no. My father was a wise man. He immediately made me start using it again, so I wouldn’t develop a phobia or be afraid to touch my neurochemical abilities. He wanted to make sure I didn’t fear the ability itself. I didn’t, but I did fear myself and what I could. I was afraid it made me a monster."

  The statement struck Jonah as ludicrous, and he chuckled. “I don’t think it’s in you to be a monster, Lila.”

  “It’s in all of us to be monstrous, Jonah,” she said quietly. Then grinned. “Even you.”

  Jonah smiled, but protested. "Your parents must have told you otherwise.”

  "Of course," Lila nodded, waving a hand dismissively. "My dad especially did his best to convince me the fault was his because he told me to get angry. Of course, he didn’t know I could do that. I’d never done it before." She sat up straight and took a deep breath. "As an adult I can see the incident for what was: just part of growing up. A lesson to learn. Having an ability like this shouldn’t be taken lightly. I needed to learn to use it with the utmost care. To Heal rather than to hurt."

  "With great power comes great responsibility," Jonah said with a grin.

  She smiled up at him with approval. "Yes, exactly." She took in his grin and frowned in confusion. “What do you mean?”

 
; “Never mind,” Jonah muttered.

  Lila frowned at him but went on. "While most kids start coming into their neurochemical abilities around age twelve, I didn't embrace mine until much later. Like sixteen or seventeen. Taking the whole thing too hard stunted my growth. I'm saying whatever this is may feel like a huge deal to you. As a kid, maybe it was. It probably isn’t anymore. Take a deep breath. Try to see it but don't stress. While you’re in the memory, it might seem huge. Even scary. When you come out and think about what it means, it probably won't be that bad." She turned back to the computer. "Okay, it's ready now. Are you?"

  "Yes," Jonah nodded. "Ready as I'll ever be." He leaned back in the seat and closed his eyes, then opened them again. "And Lila?"

  She looked over at him.

  "Thank you for telling me this."

  She smiled softly. "You're welcome." He thought he saw blooms of color in her cheeks as she dropped her eyes back to the computer screen. "Okay, here we go."

  Jonah shut his eyes and immediately felt the rushing wind in his ear canals.

  “Remember to vocalize what you see, Jonah,” Lila said from what sounded like miles away.

  A misty world materialized around him. He stood in the same hallway of the residential house. Brown carpet peered up from under his feet, contrasting with the bare white walls. The ceiling vaulted up high overhead.

  “I’m in the hallway of the house,” Jonah said.

  “Any balloons yet?” Lila’s voice came from nowhere and everywhere.

  “Not a one.” Deciding that perhaps moving quickly through the memory, before the balloons could form, might be a good idea, Jonah hurried down to the corridor to where it opened into the living space.

  All looked as it had been before, except he still saw no balloons. The room sat empty, the familiar toys sat tidily in their places.

  “There were lots of balloons by this time before,” Jonah said. “Should I be worried?”