The Wendy Williams Experience

by Wendy Williams

  Erykah Badu is another dirty backpacker who is out there. Way out there. I have interviewed her a number of times. The last was in 2003, and each time she is nuttier and nuttier. Badu comes off like she’s very concerned about family values. But isn’t the very basis of family values holding down the man who planted the seed in you to have the baby? Am I wrong? Badu had the baby with Andre 3000 from OutKast. They never got married. They never even lived together as a family, the way I understand it. What kind of family values is she representing? And she’s pregnant again. I don’t know who the father is. But she’s not married is she?

  Wendy Williams (WW): Common said that he appreciated your spiritual connection that you make.

  Erykah Badu (EB): He should.

  WW: Evidently with your men, before you actually get with them.

  EB: Right, Right. That’s what I’m put on earth for.

  WW: So Erykah Badu, in the studio everybody!

  EB: That’s right! Peace and love to everybody.

  WW: Turn the music off, because I’m absolutely floored by this conversation right now.

  EB: Peace and love, incense candles. [Badu snaps fingers.]

  WW: Okay, now you said you have three boyfriends—one of them is Common and the other two are both Dead Presidents?

  EB: Yes, ma’am. That’s how it works out. It’s a new philosophy and we’re trying to bring it to the United States. It’s actually an African tradition from the Bambula tribe.

  WW: Okay, now, Erykah, talk about this—once you’re married, can you only have one husband?

  EB: Well, there is no such thing as marriage in the Bambula tribe. It’s just a way of life, the way we do it, the way we get down.

  WW: All right. Very nice.

  EB: None of this red, white, and blue thing, just red, black, and green all the way.

  WW: Let me ask you this. What about Andre 3000?

  EB: He’s an honorary member right now. He tried to go through the course but he didn’t get all the way.

  WW: Well, apparently he did. You had the baby.

  EB: Well, no, that doesn’t mean anything. That’s just procreation; that’s what we’re put on earth for. So it means nothing, really.

  And don’t get me wrong, marriage isn’t the end-all. But if you’re going to have a child with someone and you say that family is important and you don’t want to get married, then do it the way Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn have done it. They have been together for more than twenty years. They have children and have never been married, but they are holding it down like a real family and I respect that. They represent for the life partners. And I respect life partners—whether they be hetero- or homosexual—as much as I do married partners, because despite it all, they are still a family and they honor commitment.

  Badu couldn’t hold down Dre and she couldn’t hold it down with Common, and I’m not seeing her hold it down with this next baby’s father. Commitment takes a certain level of maturity that Badu has not exhibited, as far as I’m concerned.

  I first met Badu in 1997 before she came out with her debut album, Baduizm. One of her record label reps brought her to the studio. All she said was “Peace and blessings,” and handed me an incense. I thought from that moment that she was strange. And over the years she hasn’t done a single thing to change my initial opinion. She is stone-cold nuts.

  Erykah Badu becomes an easy target because she was the first mainstream artist to introduce the dirty backpack clique. And she has made the biggest ass of herself—without my help. Her performance at the 2003 Lady of Soul Awards was classic. My parents were visiting me at the time and were watching the show. They had to call me to the television when she was on and asked me, “What’s wrong with her?!” I had no response. She was onstage with a giant afro, gold caps on her teeth, and being completely incoherent. She was accepting an award and while I don’t remember exactly what she said, I do recall the television folks cutting her off. It was very embarrassing to watch.

  Now, she is someone my parents actually adored. They went to see her perform at Level Nightclub in Miami. They were in the front row and everything—two sixty-year-olds getting down. They stood the whole three hours, had weed passed to them (I believe they kept passing without puffing), and they even had water splashed on them by Badu. They had the best time, and Erykah said she remembers them. (I mean, how could you forget two sixty-year-olds in the front row of a concert?) But her recent antics made even my parents, two of her fans, scratch their heads.

  Her 2003 interview on the Experience, I must say, was one of the strangest interviews I have done. What I was thinking throughout the interview was “What is she on?” I thought she was on something, because what type of a sense of humor must she have to think what she was doing was coming off as a joke?

  She was saying some off-the-wall things:

  WW: Okay, now, Erykah, talk about this—once you’re married, can you only have one husband?

  EB: Well, there is no such thing as marriage in the Bambula tribe. It’s just a way of life, the way we do it, the way we get down.

  and

  WW: Okay, all right. When is the last time Andre and you had sex?

  EB: Umm . . . I don’t know. I don’t remember the last time. I have an assistant that keeps a register of that. I would have to look through the records.

  WW: An assistant that keeps a register of when you have sex?

  EB: Yeah. With Andre.

  and

  EB: Do I smoke weed? No. Well, actually, it’s a new system that we use. It’s not weed, it’s a new herb that we found,found in the Himalayas by a young Chinese girl by the name of CiCi Lywa. She brought it to the United States and it’s something that we use now. It’s an herb that we are trying to get cleared by the United States board.

  I did not have the strength to argue back and forth with her. I didn’t have the strength to try and make sense of it all. I just chalked it up to Badu being Badu.

  But one thing she said that I was most concerned about was that she had not gotten her son Seven vaccinated.

  When she said she has not had her child vaccinated, I was floored. To me that was huge. I don’t know what school admits a child these days without his or her vaccination records. You have to have proof from your pediatrician that all of the vaccinations are up-to-date and that your child is healthy. I understand living a natural life and all of that, but there are certain things that are just common sense and being a responsible parent. Why would any parent leave his or her child vulnerable to deadly diseases when they can be prevented through vaccinations?

  And if he’s homeschooled, well, okay, I guess. I just hope she’s not the teacher. Her mother allegedly homeschooled her, and look how well that turned out. You figure the nut doesn’t fall far from the tree. I’m not saying anything. I’m just commenting on someone not having a child vaccinated. And the sense (or lack thereof) of that.

  WW: Has Seven ever been vaccinated?

  EB: No, ma’am. Never.

  WW: So then he’s not allowed to go to school?

  EB: He’s actually a special kind of baby.

  WW: No, I mean school like the rest of us crazy people send our kids to.

  EB: Why would we send him to that?

  WW: I don’t know; I’m trying to figure out why the rest of us nuts do that.

  EB: No, we don’t do that. That would mess him up.

  Lisa Bonet from The Cosby Show was the first celebrity I heard who was not vaccinating her child—the daughter she had with rocker Lenny Kravitz. It was the first time I had heard of such a thing. I wasn’t a parent at the time, nor was I even thinking about having a child, but I thought it was a nutty thing to do even then. I didn’t dwell on it because the whole children thing wasn’t on my radar. But now that I am a mother and know what it takes to put your child in school and what it means to not have your child vaccinated, I wonder what kind of parents these “all natural” folks are.

  Especially when you consider they are artists and spen
d a lot of time on the road and in other countries. Why would you want to leave your child open to all kinds of diseases that are found everywhere? I guess that means Erykah Badu doesn’t get shots when she travels either. I guess she doesn’t go to a gynecologist and get regular checkups. I guess she only takes herbs and stuff and that’s good enough.

  Badu or Lauryn, I don’t know which one is more of a letdown. I say to them, “Look what you have become.” Neither is a woman I would want some kid of mine to be looking at as a role model. They are both, in my opinion, nuts. I know that is such a cruel word, but it is apparently befitting both of them. Lauryn Hill had the potential to be an entertainer of the ages, someone we would be seeing ten, twenty years from now—still performing and still making a difference.

  I don’t see the same potential for Badu. Her act is wearing thin, quickly. I’m not saying that I’m a role model. But at least I’m really keeping it real!

  CHAPTER

  11

  Boob Jobs, Liposuction, and Rhinoplasty

  For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to have a different body. My struggles with my body issues are well chronicled. I devoted an entire chapter to this subject in my last book. So when I finally had enough money to go to a plastic surgeon and pay cash for the work I wanted done, I did it. No hesitations, no fears. It’s what I always wanted. Even when big girls, like Mo’Nique, who was a friend of mine at one time, were pumping their fists for the big girls and trying to make it okay for a woman to be big, I was always thinking, “You go with that! I’m getting liposuction, a tummy tuck, a boob job and the whole nine.” And I did.

  I’m one hundred percent pleased with every surgery that I have had. And when I turn sixty and my face is falling on the floor, I will get that lifted too. I believe in self-improvement. But I will caution that it is not for everyone. I will also caution that plastic surgery is very dangerous. There have been quite a few well-documented deaths on the operating table. Anesthesia can kill you. An infection can kill you. A botched surgery can kill you.

  And death aside, don’t look for plastic surgery to completely change your life. I got it because I always wanted it, but I never believed it would be a cure-all for anything wrong in my life. That was never my thought. I wanted to look better on the outside, but I was clear that if my insides weren’t together, all the plastic surgery in the world wasn’t going to fix that.

  Too many people get plastic surgery thinking that it will bring them a man, a better job, success. I’m here to tell you that that’s not true. Plastic surgery doesn’t guarantee you anything—not even that you will end up beautiful afterward (and I will talk about a few bad plastic surgery jobs in this chapter). It definitely doesn’t guarantee success. If beauty were all you needed, then explain why there are so many women who are born beautiful who aren’t successful.

  Plastic surgery is not something to enter into lightly. You have to do your research with doctors. If you’re black, you have to make sure your surgeon knows how to deal with black skin, which heals and scars differently than white skin. There are plenty of white doctors who work well with black skin. My doctor is white. But you have to do your own research and ask lots of questions.

  Just because a doctor is a plastic surgeon doesn’t mean that he or she is good at all forms of plastic surgery. My doctor is a boob specialist, but if I were getting a nose job, I wouldn’t necessarily want him doing it. If I were to get a nose job, I would prefer a black doctor. I find that oftentimes what is beautiful or nice looking to your doctor may not be right for your face. And if you do go to a white doctor, make sure you get before-and-after photos of the black patients he has operated on. I don’t want to see an Indian or a Hispanic or a tanned white person. I want to see what you did with the black noses.

  I have seen some pretty awful nose jobs on black people. Singer George Benson’s nose job is a mess. So is Peabo Bryson’s. They must have gotten it done at the same place. I don’t like Patti LaBelle’s nose job either. But considering what she was working with originally, I guess that’s the best they could do.

  Stephanie Mills has a nice nose job, even though you can tell she had a nose job. Vivica A. Fox’s nose looks cute at certain angles, but I hate to tell you that at other angles the bottom area of her nose needs work, because it looks like some kind of monkey nose in some pictures. And by the way, I don’t think she’s admitted to having a nose job, but as my listener Chanel in Long Beach, California, says, “surgery knows surgery.” She listens every day. And she knows. I know too.

  A really good nose job cannot be detected at first glance. You have to get the before-and-after photos and compare. Jennifer Lopez has a great nose job. She will deny that she has had a nose job, but check out her nose when she was a Fly Girl on In Living Color and look at her nose today. Halle Berry, in my opinion, also has had some work done, and I think it is tastefully done. I also think Mariah Carey has had some very nice and tasteful work done. But Mariah will deny all day that she has ever had any plastic surgery. Please, Mariah! I love you, but please! Check the before-and-after photos.

  I know she had a boob job. The first time I asked her about it was when I interviewed her on the phone in Philly. She cursed me out and hung up on me. I tried to bring it up on three different occasions when we kissed and made up and she came to the studio in New York in 2003, and she evaded every reference.

  WW: And I asked you about your boobs and you got mad.

  MC: Yeah, and I bought you a gift today. No, I didn’t get mad, honey. But I brought you something.

  See, she changed the subject.

  WW: Now, what would this be? A push-up bra so I can have boobs like yours? I only have—

  MC: Yes, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You don’t have this one, honey.

  She changed the subject again.

  WW: . . . and when I asked you about the boobs you cursed at me and hung up.

  MC: No, no, no. I didn’t curse at you and hang up. We joked, we had fun, and even your man over there . . . Where’d he go?

  And she changed the subject again. Mariah won’t admit to it, but it looks to me that she has had more than a boob job. She looks to have had some chin work and liposuction too. “Surgery knows surgery.”

  I think hip-hop radio personality and rapper Ed Lover has had a nose job too. A listener pointed it out to me and I went to the before-and-afters and sure enough, he has. It is very well done. But I am conflicted about him getting it. He was on the radio in Los Angeles for a few years and was trying to really break into the acting game. And I guess in Hollywood everybody’s getting work done. It’s the land of perfection and plastic surgery. You’re not part of the Hollywood scene unless you have gotten something done. And even if you haven’t and you’re a natural beauty, people still believe you did.

  But Ed Lover? He’s part of the hip-hop community first and I’m not comfortable with men in hip-hop getting plastic surgery. He’s a black man from the hood, not a white man in Hollywood.

  KRS-One has one of the largest noses I have ever seen. It’s not only big, it’s uniquely shaped. I almost give him permission to get a nose job. Almost. That nose is part of who KRS-One is. And he is, in my opinion, the essence of hip-hop—he keeps it real. He could never get a nose job. He’s got to keep that nose; it’s legendary.

  Men in general, in my opinion, never have to get plastic surgery. Their imperfections are overlooked and even applauded. Look at Owen Wilson’s hideously shaped nose. Yet he has managed to become a leading man. Men don’t have to be gorgeous or even remotely fine to succeed in entertainment. I guess that’s why I have such a negative reaction when I find out that a man has gone to such extremes as to have surgery to “fix” something. “Oh, my God, do you have feminine qualities or what?” I am thinking.

  Rock-A-Fella rap mogul Damon Dash has had liposuction, according to his baby’s mother and several other sources. I can’t confirm it, but he has reportedly gone in several times for liposuction around his waist. And if he did get l
iposuction all I have to say is, “Lose the weight, dammit! Do the sit-ups, Dame!” There is something so vain about that.

  I’ve embraced the whole metrosexualness of men. But I still have a problem going into a salon and sitting next to a man getting his nails or hair done. If I walk in and see that, I walk back out. I don’t like it. And I do understand that a lot of men are getting manicures and just getting them buffed, but why do they have to do it in my nail salon? That’s our spot. A nail salon to me is still very soft and pink. These men need to find their own place to get their nails done.

  I also hate it when people get plastic surgery and totally forget who the hell they are. I believe this happened to Lil’ Kim. Lil’ Kim was hard core, hood-representing, just raw with it. She was hood hot. But somewhere along the way, Lil’ Kim lost her gangsta.

  A couple of things happened to change her. First, Biggie died. After he died and she was left to her own devices, her music wasn’t turning out with the same kind of heat and her rap career was going south. Then she got bit by the Hollywood bug.

  All of a sudden she started getting invited to the fashion shows. Kim’s got a great personality. She’s a sweet, sweet girl and I can imagine her charming the pants off of the big-time designers like Michael Kors and Roberto Cavalli and white Hollywood. She’s very charming.

  The next thing you know, she’s on the cover of mainstream magazines and partying at mainstream events. Perhaps she felt she had to now fit in with this mainstream crowd. But I guess she forgot that this crowd was hanging out with her because she was Lil’ Kim—hard-core, hood-representing, raw Lil’ Kim.