The Fall of Lilith

by Vashti Quiroz-Vega

  Lilith peered at him. “What is it you would have me do?”

  “When Satan takes possession of my body, it causes me great pain and anguish. At first, the force of his body constricts me, suffocating me. Thenceforth, there is great pain. The agony begins in my head and spreads to the rest of my body. It is as if I had fallen into a pit of fire. I experience my flesh being consumed by flames, as though my skin is melting off my bones!” Samael’s words jolted her, and she turned away. He turned her head in his direction and lock eyes with her.

  “You can request Satan never take possession of my body again.”

  Lilith looked past him, crossed her arms and shook her head side to side in a languid manner.

  “Is it too much to ask that you help cease my suffering?” Samael stared at her wide-eyed and creased his brow.

  She nodded. “No.”

  “Then turn the words in his ears!”

  “We narrowly escaped Satan’s wrath. I––” Lilith’s words were strangled by Samael’s cries.

  “I did not escape his wrath!” He massaged his temples. “He punishes me every time he takes possession of me. Do you not understand?”

  Lilith shook her head. “Yes.” She gave a half shrug. “Fault lies with us for grieving him. We must give him sufficient time to get over our betrayal.” She shifted her eyes to the ground.

  Samael clasped his hands over his head and gawked at her. “You have experienced what it is like to burn, although in a small portion of your body, and we were able to extinguish the fire before it had consumed you wholly. Imagine your entire body burning unceasingly!”

  Lilith shook her head and avoided his piteous stare.

  “We both betrayed Satan, yet I am the only one who suffers. How is this reasonable to you?” Samael’s voice was thick with emotion. He gazed at Lilith’s expressionless face. He tried to blink away gathering tears. She remained silent.

  “Thus, I should go on agonizing, while you revel in the gains of Satan’s control of me?” His tone was flat.

  “What is your meaning?” Lilith gulped.

  “You get to have us both, your chances of having offspring have multiplied, and the red fiend need never show its ugly face again.”

  Lilith stared at the ground once more eluding Samael’s imploring gaze.

  “Satan longs to please you. If you wished to end my suffering you have but to whisper.”

  Lilith finally looked at him. She tilted her head and pressed her mouth together in thought. “I cannot help you.”

  Immobilized, he stared at her with wide eyes and raised eyebrows. He smacked his palm against his forehead and shook his head. “You have turned my heart as black as the mark left by Cam’s blade. At this moment my love for you has turned to hate.”

  Lilith moved away and pursed her lips.

  He ran his hands through his hair. “I should have known I would get no sympathy from a deceitful snake! You have a cold and unfeeling nature and have wounded me more deeply than any injury Satan could ever inflict on me. Although you can shift in and out of your serpent form, you shall always be a legless reptile in my eyes.” Samael jumped to his feet and left her side.

  Lilith rubbed her throat. Her eyes shifted to the ground and became glazed with a glittery layer of tears. She folded her legs close to her body and hugged her knees and wept as the magnitude of Samael’s words swept over her. She no longer heard the sounds of the world, only a haunting ringing in her ears. Her body convulsed with sobs.

  Gadreel sat on a flat rock in the water. She heard Lilith’s desperate cries and thought Satan’s punishment had finally come. She waded to the beach and saw her weeping.

  “What is the matter?” Gadreel’s forehead puckered. “You have never allowed anyone to see you in a vulnerable state. Are you mourning the loss of your hair?” Gadreel leaned in and touched her shoulder. “You know if you burrow underground overnight, you shall heal and your hair shall grow back.”

  Lilith stared ahead. “Satan has seen Samael and I engaged in sexual acts.” Her voice was hoarse. She turned and glanced at her. Gadreel blinked a long blink through tousled curls.

  Lilith cocked her head and frowned. “You do not seem surprised by this. Why not?”

  “I knew sooner or later Satan would discover the two of you.”

  “Indeed? And you are pleased, are you not?” Lilith sprang to her feet and stepped toward her. Gadreel recoiled in fear. “You are becoming bold. Do you think me weak because of my injuries?”

  “What was Satan’s reaction seeing you in Samael’s arms?”

  “We did not see Satan coming. We were making love and suddenly, Samael asked me who he was. When I told him, Satan released his body. Only then, I understood that Satan had possessed him.”

  Gadreel moved away and crossed her arms. “I know Samael’s punishment, for he has told me how he suffers under Satan’s control, but what retribution does Satan have planned against you?”

  Lilith glared at her and then quickly changed her demeanor. She shrugged and looked at the sand. “My punishment is knowing that when Satan makes love to me in possession of Samael’s body, my good friend shall be in agony.”

  Lilith glanced up and looked right into Gadreel’s eyes, the smile she still wore dripping with a silent threat. “Do you know what is good about this arrangement?”

  Speechless, Gadreel shook her head.

  “I no longer have to fret about having offspring that resemble little red fiends. Samael is gorgeous and he does not have an alternate form. My offspring shall be beautiful!”

  “Oh Lilith.” Gadreel chuckled and looked up. “You have forgotten about your alternate form. And although Satan takes possession of Samael’s body, do not believe for a moment that he shall not affect your offspring. It may end with your young hatching out of an egg.”

  Rage bloomed on Lilith’s face. She snarled and shifted into the snake creature. Using her tail she knocked Gadreel to the ground and pounded her with it. Gadreel held up her hands and wailed, writhing on the sand, as she received blow after bone-crushing blow.

  Satan ran toward them. “Cease this attack at once!”

  Lilith stopped, her tail dripped with Gadreel’s blood. Her claws were spread wide, fangs exposed and her bosom heaved with rapid breaths.

  When he heard Gadreel’s screams, Samael dashed to the beach. He stopped short when he saw her lying in her own blood.

  He stared at Lilith, crinkled his nose and curled his lip with disgust. “You must control your revolting beast, for she is heartless, and dangerous.”

  Gadreel lay unconscious on the beach, her blood still spilling onto the sand.

  Satan glared at Lilith. “You must save her. We cannot lose any more of our own.”

  Lilith returned to her angel form. Panting, she approached Gadreel’s body. She looked at her with a slight frown and pressed lips. She knelt beside her, searched her body for open wounds and created patches of sand to stop the bleeding.

  “Dig a trench and put her in it. Let her rest the night. She shall be fine come sunrise.” Lilith left her side.

  Samael and Satan dug a large ditch. They placed Gadreel’s limp body in it and Samael laid by her side.

  “I shall stay with her this night to ensure no more harm comes to her.” Samael looked at her with woeful eyes. He put his arms around her motionless body and slept.

  Satan seized Lilith’s arm and dragged her away. He returned to the small meadow where he had discovered her with Samael.

  “Do not assume that I have overlooked your infidelity. I shall soon think of a punishment befitting your transgressions.” With these words, he transformed into the red fiend. He shoved her to the ground. He grabbed hold of one of her wings’ shoulders and stomped on it, breaking its bony frame and then did the same to the other. He clawed her face, head and back ripping off pieces of her charred skin. She squirmed and groaned in pain, but he continued punching and kicking her, all the while snarling in rage. Afterward, he violated her again and again
while she shrieked and wailed, knowing no one would come to her rescue.

  After the deed was done, Satan turned over and fell asleep. Lilith lay motionless, paralyzed by pain, for a long while. Then she crawled, wracked with pain to an area of hollow ground and burrowed underground for the night. She lay very still in her hole, for the slightest movement was agony. “I shall fill my heart with hate until there is no room for any other weak emotion. I shall be strong, and make myself emotionless, uncaring, hard like a stone.” She clamped her eyes shut. “I shall remain focused on my one true goal. Revenge.”

  Chapter 39

  Misjudgment

  The following morning Gadreel woke to find Samael lying by her side asleep with his arms around her, and Dagon looming over the ditch where they slept. He glowered at her, his chest heaved with rapid breaths and his nostrils flared. He pivoted on his heel and rushed toward the ocean. She scrambled to get out of the ditch, but she was yet in a great deal of pain. She finally clambered out of the trench and crawled a distance before struggling to her feet.

  She staggered after Dagon. “Wait! Please stop!”

  He stopped, his feet already in the water. He turned to face her, his teeth gnashing. “Say what you must.” His manner was curt.

  “You have misconstrued the situation. Nothing took place between Samael and I,” she said.

  “Yet there he was with his arms around you, sleeping the restful sleep of a gratified male.” Dagon pointed toward Samael the blood vessels in his neck throbbing.

  “No!” Gadreel shook her head eyes wide. “I cannot explain why he was by my side, for I do not know, but––”

  “Do not deny what is clear to my eyes!” Dagon turned away, jumped into the water and disappeared into the sea, taking their daughters.

  “No!” She screamed, sagged to the sand her body shaking with sobs.

  Samael awoke. “What is the matter? Did Lilith try to hurt you again?”

  She gazed at him her eyes red and wilted from weeping and shook her head. “Dagon saw you lying by my side and misjudged the situation. He is gone now and with him, my daughters. I shall never see them again.” Gadreel curled into a fetal position and buried her face in her hands. “Oh Samael, how shall I live without them?” She glanced up at him with doleful eyes her face colorless, like the snow on the tall mountain they landed on long ago.

  Samael sat by her side with slumped shoulders, looking down and away. “You have always been good to me. I apologize for the way I have treated you in the past.” He looked at her, maintaining eye contact. “I vow to be kinder, and I shall do everything I can to reunite you with your little ones.”

  Gadreel looked into his golden amber, wolf-like eyes for a long moment and then nodded. She sat upright and struggled to get to her feet. Samael helped her stand and held her arm as they ambled together to the coastline. She stared at the vast ocean with him by her side, holding her steady.

  Satan and Lilith joined them.

  “We shall rest this day.” Satan heaved a deep breath and blew out slowly. “I must decide our course of action. We must also provide time to all those needing to recover.” He returned to the area lined with trees to sit under one and form thoughts.

  Gadreel quivered and glanced wide-eyed at Lilith, who stood nude and silent by her side. Gadreel gasped. Lilith’s head hung low, shoulders hunched. Her burns had healed noticeably and her hair had grown to just below her jawline. It was a jumbled mess and hung covering most of her face. Although the burn-marks were faded, her body showed bumps, bruises, and abrasions. She lifted her head in an abrupt manner and stared at them. Gadreel stepped back and pressed a hand over her mouth.

  Samael gasped, crinkled his nose and turned away. “Your face is––difficult to look at. You are grotesque.”

  Lilith could not open one of her eyes, for large, black blisters compressed her eyelids shut. Her other eyeball was swollen, bloodshot, and bulged from its socket. Her nose was puffy and crooked, and her bottom lip was split and twice its size. There was swelling and deep bruises around her throat. Spherical clotted pits replaced her nipples, as if they had been bitten off. Large bite marks, welts, and claw marks covered her body. She opened and closed her mouth but could not emit words.

  That morning after she crawled out of her burrow, almost fully restored from her burn injuries, Satan had thrashed her and violated her once more. She cleared her throat. “Satan desires to show you that I shall suffer for my betrayal,” she said in a soft hoarse voice. She rubbed her throat as she spoke. “He also requires that I remain unclothed––like an animal.”

  Gadreel leaned in to hear her words because they were barely audible.

  Samael grimaced. “I am unsure whether to feel pity for you, or rejoice in the fact that now you understand what it is to truly suffer.”

  Gadreel frowned, grasped his arm and shook her head lightly. “Be kind, for this is only the beginning of her torture.”

  Many days gave way to nights. They stayed on the coast where Fornues was released. Lilith remained silent and reclusive. Night after night, the red fiend tortured and ravaged her, but she suffered in silence. She would not give the others the pleasure of listening to her agony. She ceased paying mind to Satan’s actions. Instead, she escaped to a different place in her mind where she focused on vengeance against God, and on her new quest to destroy those who betrayed her and caused her pain.

  After what seemed an eternity to Lilith, Satan’s anger over her affair with Samael began to abate. While he continued to lie with her in the form of the red fiend, the instances became few and far between, and he finally stopped the beatings.

  Although her body’s wounds healed, her heart was blackened and bursting with hate. Her mind was occupied with thoughts of vengeance. She desired revenge on God for not giving her a rightful place in the hierarchy of angels and casting her from Floraison. She sought retaliation against Satan for the way he had mistreated her, and against Gadreel and Samael for turning their backs on her. She would never recover from the damages inflicted to her heart and mind. She was forever changed.

  Though many lunar months came to pass, Gadreel never set eyes on Dagon or her little mermaids. She spent many moments staring out to sea. “I fear I shall never see Dagon or my daughters again,” she whispered to the fish that surrounded her. “I miss them with all my heart.” She lowered her head.

  Samael kept his promise. He was kind toward her while she was mending from her injuries, and long after she had recovered from them.

  Chapter 40

  Birth of the Inevitable

  Time continued on and they lingered on the beach. Lilith began to feel unwell and was unable to keep food within her. Every morning she became ill and expelled the contents of her stomach onto the beach. Her middle began to swell and her breasts engorged. She knew she was with child, and so did everyone else.

  Once she had believed it would be a joyous occasion when this finally happened, but she detested the thing growing inside her. She huddled in hidden corners away from the others and wept. “Why do you go on living and growing inside of me?” She snarled and slammed her fists on her pregnant belly again and again. “I loathe you and I wish for your death!” Her body shook with sobs. She stopped, all of a sudden, wiped her face and changed her demeanor. “I must conceal my feelings.” She hurried and raked her fingers through her hair in an aggressive manner and sauntered to shore.

  One day, Lilith bent over in terrible pain. Blood gushed from her. She was alone gathering figs when the intense aches began. She fell to her knees, screaming and clutching her belly. No one came to her aid. She struggled to her feet and waddled to where the others were gathered and stood before them, blood streaming down her legs. Gadreel gasped and scrambled to her side. Samael grimaced, turned his face and continued what he was doing. Satan strolled to her.

  He placed his hand on her burgeoning stomach. “My offspring is not yet ready to be born.” His voice was chilling. Lilith stared at him with wide eyes and Gadreel helpe
d her sit under a tree.

  Lilith groaned and writhed in convulsions of pain for days. The thing inside her clawed and kicked, stretching and expanding her belly. Gadreel held her hand and sang softly to her attempting to ease her pain while Satan and Samael ignored her.

  Finally, the day arrived for the birth. Satan paced to and fro, unable to remain still. He grinned and laughed and tilted his head back and yelled, “My son is coming!” Samael shook with laughter and clapped his hands. Gadreel furrowed her brow and observed her.

  Lilith lay sprawled, shrieking and beating on the ground in intolerable pain. She looked ashen and feeble. Her squinted eyes were bloodshot, and there were dark gray circles under them, since she had not rested in days.

  Satan propped her against a tree and positioned himself between her legs.

  “Hold her legs apart! My offspring shall be born.” He grinned at the others and they rushed and did as he instructed.

  Lilith sensed an overwhelming urge to push. She exerted several times under immense pressure and pain. At last, they saw a head crowning between her legs. It was large and gleaming red. It tore its way through her. She screamed through her teeth and clutched Gadreel and Samael’s arms.

  All eyes were fixed on the creature exiting her womb. As she feared and Gadreel predicted, the infant was the very likeness of its father’s red alter ego, with one exception: it had a serpent’s tail like its mother.

  Gadreel stifled a scream. Samael recoiled with revulsion.

  The small being was hairless and red. Two small, bony nubs protruded from its head. It was born with small, sharp claws on its hands. Two dark, bone-like lumps jutting out of its back indicated the creature would sprout wings in time. Its head and torso resembled theirs, but instead of legs, it carried a scaly serpent’s tail. The male infant slithered through Lilith’s opening and began to bawl.

  Lilith whimpered, fearful Satan would discover her loathing of their newborn. She looked to Samael and Gadreel for sympathy, but she saw nothing but disgust and fear in their faces.