Registry's Secrets (The Mengliad Series Book 2)

by Jana Janeway

  ‘That first time, we didn’t have Chimie yet – not like we do now, anyway – and it was so good, I almost lost my mind.’

  Smirking, he leaned in, his lips an inch from hers. ‘Only because it was all so new to you.’ “You were so scared,” he whispered.

  “I wasn’t scared,” she whispered back, lying. Her self-defense was weak at best, already anticipating his kiss. ‘I was overwhelmed.’

  ‘I like overwhelming you,’ he admitted.

  ‘I know you do. I like it when you overwhelm me.’

  ‘I know.’

  His lips had just touched hers, finally, when they heard an exaggerated clearing of a throat nearby.

  “Don’t mean to be a cock blocker, but we’re having a last meeting, and Marcy wants you there.”

  Breaking the kiss, Craddock semi-glared in Jeramey’s direction for the crude term he had used, but otherwise ignored him. ‘I could tell him no. I already know my part in all of this.’

  ‘What if there’s been some kind of important change?’

  ‘Then they can fill me in on the way there tomorrow. We’ll be driving for hours. Plenty of time to catch me up on any changes.’

  ‘But then I can’t listen in.’

  He chuckled, pulling her into his arms. ‘But then afterwards…?’

  She nodded against him, imagining themselves in the back of the van, in the throes of passion. Craddock groaned, fighting against his growing arousal.

  ‘God, baby, you have no idea how badly I want to tell Jeramey to fuck off right now.’

  Laughing, she pushed him away from her and started towards the house. ‘Yeah, I do.’

  He reluctantly followed, glowering at a smirking Jeramey as he approached him. “This better be an important, fast meeting, McLoughin. Jess and I have a date.”

  “You can last-name me all you want, but this isn’t my party. Ever hear the phrase ‘don’t shoot the messenger’?”

  They could hear Marcy’s slightly muffled speaking coming from the living room when they stepped through the back door that led into the kitchen.

  “This isn’t a criminal trial, so there isn’t a judge, just a director. Horace Rathbone… easily one hundred sixty years old. A real ‘been there, done that, seen it all and lived to tell the tale’ kind of guy. Nothing shocks him, which is good for us. Things should run smoothly with him in charge.”

  “He responds best to concise facts, rather than emotional displays, so keep your answers short and your emotions in check.”

  Wade had taken center stage with Marcy; Bibi was left to sit with Josiah, Shea, and Stacy on the longest of three couches. The foursome made room for Jessica and Craddock to join them as Jeramey stood beside his wife.

  “The trial is expected to take two days,” Wade continued, “so we’ll be staying there overnight, in the witnesses’ quarters.”

  “Once you sign in,” Jeramey contributed, “you’re not allowed to leave the gated property until after the verdict. No cell phones, no use of their landlines, no contact at all with the outside world while you’re there.”

  ‘Why?’

  Craddock leaned into her a little. ‘It’s a little like a jury in a criminal trial being sequestered. No information gets in, no information gets out.’

  ‘So for two days, at least, I’ll be left to wonder if you’re okay, because you won’t be able to contact me to let me know if you are.’

  ‘I’ll be okay, Jess. Except for missing you, I’ll be okay.’

  ‘What if they’re all in on it? The twelve chairpersons…? Whoever? What if they’re laying a trap, and when you get down there—?’

  ‘Stop.’ He knew it was inevitable that she would gear up again, the closer it got to the time when he would have to leave her. ‘The entire agency isn’t corrupt, just Becket, and yeah, some of his loyal followers, but what you’re suggesting… no.’

  His confidence helped settle her rising panic. Not completely, but enough so that he could distract her from it.

  ‘I want you all to myself tonight, Jess. Just the two of us, in the van, all night long. I want to make up for lost time.’

  Taking in a shuddery breath, she leaned heavily against him, joining him in his imagined fantasies. The meeting fell to a distant buzzing sound they both ignored.

  ‘I can’t wait to make you scream. Repeatedly.’

  ‘Will we be getting any sleep?’ she asked, teasing him. She couldn’t hide how his thoughts affected her, though. She shifted her weight a little, trying to ease the growing ache.

  ‘Very little,’ he promised, grinning when she laughed.

  “Guys?”

  Marcy’s voice was the equivalent of a bucket of ice water being thrown on them.

  Jessica kept her eyes closed, unable to face the knowing looks she could feel on her. Her cheeks grew hot as the blood rushed to them.

  “Sorry,” Craddock said, taking the greater part of the unwanted attention on himself. “Continue.”

  “Thanks for your permission,” Marcy retorted. She wasn’t exactly angry, just in ‘agent mode’. She would be a better friend once the meeting was over. “Our request to leave thirty minutes before Becket and his agents, regardless of the outcome, was granted…”

  ‘They won’t be able to follow you?’

  Craddock kissed Jessica’s temple, responding only in that way. She was finally, truly, thinking positively. Just a little, but it was a welcome difference to her usual negativity.

  “The car assignments are as follows…”

  Craddock already knew where he was sitting – in the van with Wade, Jeramey, and Marcy. The rest of what was said became lost, like inane chatter on deaf ears.

  It wasn’t until everyone started leaving that they realized the meeting had been adjourned. They had been too immersed in each other to notice.

  “Guys?” Marcy’s scowl and crossed arms indicated her mood.

  ‘I think I’m about to get scolded.’ Craddock wasn’t at all concerned about that, he just didn’t want to endure it for too long. He and Jessica had plans.

  ‘I was the one who laughed,’ Jessica argued.

  ‘Irrelevant. She can scold me, but not you. Not tonight.’ “What?” he asked Marcy, his scowl matching hers.

  But then hers dissolved, a grin showing instead. “Take some blankets, ‘cause it’ll get cold out there. And we’re getting a four A.M. start, so set your alarm accordingly, or else I’ll have to send someone out there to rouse you.”

  “And by someone,” Jeramey added, “she means me.”

  He laughed and turned to leave, but Marcy stayed, smirking back at the confused couple. “You’re not exactly subtle, guys,” she said, knowing they were looking for an explanation. “Besides that, it makes sense that you’d want some alone time. Spend it wisely.”

  Initially, Jessica was embarrassed, but as she watched Marcy walk away, following after Jeramey, something shifted. Her perspective suddenly changed.

  ‘It really doesn’t matter, does it? Everyone knows, and they just don’t care.’

  Nobody stayed after the meeting to gawk at them. No one looked at them with disgust or disapproval. They simply went about their business, preparing for the morning trip that was of the utmost importance.

  Craddock grinned and brought her tighter against his side. ‘They really don’t. Anyone with an ounce of intelligence gets it. Go to the van, okay? I’ll get some food and blankets and be right out.’

  ‘Food?’

  ‘I’m not leaving your side until I absolutely have to, and we’re going to need to eat eventually.’ He kissed her hair, lingering there. ‘Go. I’m right behind you.’

  He smiled, watching her walk away before rushing off in search of things, eager to join her. By the time he got to the van, she was already undressed, waiting for him.

  “I’m going to hold you to it, I hope you know,”she said, smirking. ‘All night long. Let’s see how many times you can make me scream.’

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

&nbs
p; It was a long, monotonous drive, just as Craddock expected it to be. He wished he could sleep, to make the time go faster, but whenever he would start to nod off, his spinning thoughts would wake him back up.

  He finally gave up on the idea of it, and instead willed the minutes to tick by faster by trying to remember every detail of the night before.

  His hope was that, by focusing on his time with Jessica, it would help ease the ache of missing her, but the relief was minimal. Memories were a weak substitute for the company of her constant thoughts.

  “You’re gonna be climbing the walls by the end of this, aren’t you?”

  Craddock opened his eyes, fixing them on Jeramey.

  “I knew you weren’t sleeping,” Jeramey said, shrugging. “You don’t usually fidget when you’re sleeping.”

  “I gotta say, the fact that you know that is a little bit disturbing.”

  Jeramey laughed at the deadpanned quip, but quickly became serious. “It’s hard to be away from them, isn’t it?” He glanced over at Marcy, who looked to be asleep. “Hardest in the beginning, but it never gets easy, really. I would cuff her to me, if I thought I could get away with it.” His grin indicated he was joking, but there was depth and a little truth to the lighthearted comment.

  “How do you cope with it?” Craddock asked. Maybe there was a trick to it, something to help ease the pain and sense of loss.

  “Usually, by counting down to when I can be with her again. It helped that we were assigned partners. That’s how we met, actually.”

  “Was there Chimie at first sight?”

  Jeramey smirked a little. “Like being struck by lightning, only I didn’t know what it was. I figured that shit was all a fairytale. People who claimed to have it were just sappy romantics, pulling people’s chains or whatever. Marcy had to tell me what it was. I argued, she kissed me, my brain and heart exploded… The rest is history.”

  “What’s the longest you guys have been apart?”

  “Two days, fourteen hours.” He grimaced, the memory vivid. “She had a trial she was testifying at – same place we’re going to now – and I wasn’t invited. I wasn’t her partner when the deal went down, so there was no need for me to be there at the hearing. I smoked half a carton of cigarettes in those sixty-two hours. Hardly slept, ate only when I had to…”

  “So it isn’t just because our Chimie is unique, that Jess and I are having difficulties separating from each other?”

  “No, it’s not just because, but I’m guessing it’s probably worse, because it is unique.”

  “If we’re considered unique, then what’s considered normal? What’s yours and Marcy’s Chimie like?”

  Jeramey laughed. “Not so sure Marcy and I should be representing what’s considered normal, but…” He gazed at his wife, grinning. “I can read her emotions, but not her exact thoughts. Right now, I know she’s not actually sleeping, but listening in on our conversation. Eavesdropper,” he accused in her direction, laughing again when a slight smirk showed within her otherwise blank expression. Her eyes remained closed.

  “I can tell when she’s dreaming,” he continued, “and I can tell if it’s a good dream or a nightmare, but I can’t actually see them play out.”

  By the way Jeramey stared back at him, expectantly, Craddock could tell that he knew. He knew, and he wanted details. And so he gave them to him.

  “It’s weird, because you can tell it’s not real. When you yourself are dreaming, it often feels real. Very real. You don’t realize it’s a dream until you wake up. Seeing someone else’s dreams… you can just tell. There’s something not quite right about it. Colors are off, or depth, or surroundings.” He shrugged. “The good dreams are fun to watch. The nightmares…” He shook his head and sighed.

  “I’m sure she’s had her share of those.”

  “Both awake and asleep.” Leaning his head back against the window, Craddock scowled at the van’s ceiling. “If I can make her dreams a little happier… I’ll cope with the pain of being away from her, if I can give her that.”

  “She handled you leaving better than I thought she would,” Jeramey mentioned carefully.

  Craddock closed his eyes, his scowl deepening. “Outwardly.”

  Inwardly…

  ****

  She tried hiding it – tried fighting against the tears, attempting to appear strong – but he knew. Of course he knew, but he was powerless to fix it. He couldn’t stay behind and she couldn’t go with him.

  He held her as tightly as he could, assuring her with his thoughts, even as Marcy insisted they were going to be late and demanded he get in the van.

  ‘Shut up, Marcy.’

  Jessica’s voiceless gripe caused Craddock to smile into her hair. ‘I had the best time with you last night. And this morning. When I get back, we’ll have ourselves an encore performance in celebration.’

  Her thoughts jumped randomly as she nodded against him, keeping her true feelings hidden by considering the inane. He knew anyway. Her entire body was tense with fear.

  ‘I love you, Jess. And I love our baby. There’s nothing on this planet that can stop me from coming back to you. Nothing.’

  Even with Marcy’s impatient, exaggerated sigh, Craddock continued to comfort Jessica, only minimally concerned that he was holding up the group’s departure. His top priority was Jessica’s mental wellbeing. If she needed a few extra minutes to calm herself enough to let him go, he would give her that.

  ‘Call me when you get there, okay? And as soon as you can when it’s over with.’

  ‘I will, I promise.’

  It took Shea’s gentle urging to pry Jessica off of Craddock. With a forced smile, she waved as the van began to leave, but he knew it was a façade. He could read her for a few moments, for a few feet of the drive away; for seconds only, but for long enough to know. She was hurting, and he could do nothing but leave her…

  ****

  “You okay?”

  Eyes still closed, Craddock nodded, remembering when he had lost her from sight and mind. He had still been able to see her as the distance grew, in her brother’s arms, when their Chimie dissolved. It was several seconds later that he could no longer distinguish her clearly. Soon after, the turn in the road severed their last remaining connection.

  “She’s scared.”

  “And you’re not?” Jeramey smirked a little when Craddock opened his eyes again and looked over at him.

  “Not about the same things she is.” Sighing, he admitted, “I’m worried that I’ll fail her. Maybe not with this – I know the verdict is out of my hands – but with other things.”

  “Like?” Jeramey prompted.

  “Being a good father, for starters.”

  Jeramey chuckled. “Ah. Yeah. I hear ya. Parenting is hard under the best of circumstances. Not exactly the best right now, is it?”

  “No, it’s not. And she has all this confidence in me, ya’know? When she imagines me as a father, I’m just the world’s best dad. I’m worried that I won’t measure up to her expectations. I mean, what do I know about raising a kid?”

  “I imagine it’s mostly instinctual. If you love the little ankle biter, the rest should just fall into place.”

  “I s’pose.” Craddock returned his attention to the worn gray upholstery above him before closing his eyes again. Of course he would love his child – he already did – but it couldn’t possibly be that simple. There had to be more to parenting than that.

  ‘I miss you, baby. God. I miss you being in my head.’

  “You wanna call her?” Jeramey asked.

  Briefly, Craddock wondered if he had said that out loud, but decided a moment later that he hadn’t. “I told her I would call her when we get there.”

  “Which will be in about fifteen minutes.”

  In response to Marcy’s sudden voice, Craddock’s eyes flew open, meeting hers. She gave a little nod towards the window behind him; he turned in his seat, to see what she was gesturing to.

  He cou
ld see it on the horizon, a speck in the distance far off the highway they were driving on. To anyone not in the know, it would appear to be a mansion that some rich, eccentric recluse called home. The road that led to it was unmarked and easily overlooked, so that those who might be curious about it would have no clue how to get there.

  There were two guard towers up the winding trail, about a mile apart. The first was to establish that you had the right to be on the property, the second was to confirm that you hadn’t slipped past the first.

  Once they were given clearance by the second guard, Marcy handed her cell phone over to Craddock. “Speed dial two.”

  Jessica’s voice was in Craddock’s ear before the second ring.

  “Hello?”

  His smile was instant. “Hi, baby, we’re here.” But with her shaky intake of breath, he winced and his smile dissolved. He pushed away his pain. “You should see this place!” he said brightly, for her benefit. “It’s like a royal palace in the middle of nowhere!”

  There was a long moment of silence, before she finally whispered, “I miss you.”

  “I miss you too, baby.” He was still trying to sound cheerful. “It’s odd, hearing your voice but not your thoughts.”

  “Yeah, it is.”

  She sounded so despondent, detached, like she had distanced herself from all emotions. Sighing, he dropped all pretenses. “I’m sorry, Jess. I know you’re hurting, and I’m sorry.”

  “Just… don’t worry about me. You have more important things to focus on right now. I’m… I’m okay.”

  He knew she was lying. The hesitation as she spoke told him she was, but he would have known, anyway, even if she had said the words convincingly. “Nothing is more important than you.”

  Jeramey caught his eye, a look passing between them that Craddock was easily able to interpret. Jessica needed him to be firm, to convey just how strong he knew her to be.

  “No more tears, baby, and no more idle time, dwelling and worrying. I’m assigning you a task.”

  “Yeah? And what’s that?”

  Detecting the slightest hint of sarcasm in her tone, he grinned. “I want you to pick out ten baby names, five for a girl and five for a boy, and have them ready for my consideration by the time I get back.”