Crystal Jake: The Complete EDEN Series Box Set

by Georgia Le Carre

  He stands, closes my legs into some semblance of respectability and pulls me up. Our eyes meet. God! This man is so beautiful.

  ‘You look like you could do with a drink,’ he says, tying the towel around his hips.

  I find my jeans and pull them on. He walks to the bar, pours us a glass of whiskey each. He passes me a glass and our fingers touch. A spark goes through me. I withdraw my hand, spilling whiskey. His eyes are dark, but I can tell by the set of his mouth that the sex is over. It is time to talk.

  I pour the whiskey into my throat. It burns all the way down.

  He raises his eyebrows, but says nothing. I notice that he doesn’t drink, but puts his glass down on the counter. He swivels his head.

  ‘You wanted to talk?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  Suddenly I am nervous. What if it is only sex with him? What if Nan is wrong? I swallow hard. I open my mouth and his phone rings. He frowns. I have noticed that his phone almost never rings. The last time it rang it had been Dom telling him about the fire.

  ‘Can you wait one moment?’

  I nod.

  He moves toward it. Looks at the screen and immediately presses the answer button.

  ‘Yeah,’ he says and his voice is worried.

  I can hear a woman’s voice. It sounds panicked and hysterical.

  ‘Calm down. Calm down,’ he says.

  The voice becomes slightly subdued.

  ‘Yes, it’s true,’ he admits.

  And the voice screams so loud he stares at the phone in disbelief. Then he looks at me and silently mouths, ‘It’s my mother.’

  I nod solemnly. A family problem of some kind, obviously.

  ‘Look, Ma. I’ll come around tonight. Just please calm down. I’ll explain everything when I get there, OK?’

  Even from where I am I can hear her ranting, not in the least comforted. At one point Jake has to hold the phone away from his ear.

  ‘What the hell are you on about? I’m perfectly fine.’ He runs his hand through his hair distractedly.

  ‘All right, I’ll be there in less than an hour,’ he concedes.

  I hear another explosion of sound.

  ‘OK, OK, I’ll leave now. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.’

  I hear quiet sobbing.

  ‘Ma, stop it. Ma?’

  I hear another hysterical outpouring.

  He sighs with frustration. ‘I’ll come right now, OK? Just wait for me.’

  He terminates the call and looks at me. ‘She’s a bit distraught.’

  ‘What happened?’

  ‘Apparently, Andrea called and told her I married you.’ He raises an eyebrow. ‘Any idea how Andrea knew?’

  ‘Oops, sorry,’ I say, biting my bottom lip.

  He grins at me. ‘It’s not like I wasn’t going to tell her anyway, but it does mean I have to go see her now. Will you wait for me here? We’ll talk when I come back.’

  I nod.

  ‘Come upstairs and keep me company while I dress.’

  ‘Yeah?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  And I thought it was going to be difficult and awkward. It is not. I smile. God! I’m so in love with this man. ‘OK.’

  I watch him pull on a pair of black jeans in silence, just drinking in the sight of him. He pulls a black T-shirt over his taut muscles.

  ‘Why does your mother hate me?’

  He looks at me seriously and doesn’t try to gloss over the issue. ‘I don’t know. But I know she doesn’t know you the way I do and when she does she’ll absolutely love you…’ For a moment it seems as if the sentence is not complete, then he smiles and goes to the door. I follow him.

  At the door he turns and kisses me.

  ‘You smell of sex and me,’ he whispers in my ear.

  I rear back. ‘I’ll have a shower before you get back.’

  ‘Don’t you dare. I love it.’ A smile tilts his mouth and warmth kindles in my belly. He goes down the steps, turns back and starts walking backwards mouthing, ‘Be back soon. Don’t go anywhere.’

  He blows a kiss and I shyly return it. Maybe, it’s going to be all right.

  I watch him get into his car and drive off. Then I close the door and lean against it. The house is large and deathly quiet around me. I shut my eyes and hold to the fierce joy that burns in my chest. I think of the way his gaze had followed my tongue as it licked my lower lip. I remember the heat and I recall the tenderness between us, almost surreal. And I cover my mouth to hide the smile of pure happiness.

  And what do the gods do?

  They make my phone ring. I look at it and for a few rings I do nothing. Just stare at the number. I knew I shouldn’t have called Robin. Then I press Answer and put it to my ear.

  A woman says cheerily, ‘Hey, Lily. It’s Amber.’

  ‘Hey, Amber,’ I say automatically. Amber is the way that Robin makes contact with me.

  ‘How are you?’

  ‘Fine.’ I clear my throat. ‘I’m fine.’

  ‘We should meet. Go out for coffee or something.’

  ‘OK. Where do you want to go?’

  ‘How about Starbucks? You like the green tea thingamajig there, don’t you?’

  ‘Yes, I love it. Let’s meet there. When?’

  ‘How about now?’

  ‘Now?’

  ‘Yes, I have so much to tell you.’

  ‘Right. I’ll be there in the next twenty minutes.’

  ‘Oh, good. Can’t wait to see you again.’

  ‘Same here,’ I reply.

  ‘Bye,’ she says in a high, bright voice.

  ‘Bye,’ I say in a low, sad voice.

  You take your aim. You fire. And shoot me down. Fuck you, Fate.

  My legs feel like lead. I go into Jake’s office. I have only been here once. I know the drawers are all locked and the desk is always stunningly bare. I take a piece of paper from the printer.

  I take the quill from the ink stand. Just like him to have a fucking quill instead of a ballpoint pen. I feel the tears pricking at my eyes. No, I will not cry. There is a way out. I know it. I am unlucky but he is lucky and he will get what he wants. And he wants me. I know that. Well, I think I know that. Maybe he doesn’t love me. But he wants me. I can tell. With every action he shows me. And Jake always gets what he wants.

  I write my note. It is short and to the point.

  Jake,

  I have to go out for a bit. I’ll see you when I get back, OK? x

  Should I add another kiss? One seems so informal. A jeering voice says, WTF! So I add three more kisses.

  And then I leave my sanctuary.

  SEVEN

  Lily

  The Starbucks in Baker Street is quiet. Robin is sitting on a sofa in a corner at the back. He stands and waves to me. I walk toward him. He is wearing jeans and an expensive leather jacket over a Ralph Lauren T-shirt. His face is familiar—his eyes travel my face and body quickly, assessing, assimilating. I can see that he hasn’t ordered anything yet.

  ‘Look at you,’ he says loudly, so that anyone watching would just think we are friends meeting after a long time.

  He kisses me on the cheeks enthusiastically while I stand awkwardly in the loose circle of his arm. ‘How’ve you been?’

  ‘Fine.’

  ‘What will you have?’

  ‘A latte.’

  ‘Anything to eat?’

  I shake my head.

  ‘You sure? The company is picking up the bill,’ he tempts with a grin.

  ‘Not hungry, Rob,’ I reply.

  ‘Right,’ he says in a more serious tone, and goes off to the serving counter. I look around me. There are only two other customers in this back section—a woman scrolling through the messages on her handheld and a man who is immersed in a newspaper. I turn away and stare at my handbag. There is no queue and Robin is back quickly. He places my latte in front of me. He is drinking a cappuccino.

  ‘Thanks,’ I say, reaching for two sugar sachets. I tear them and upend them into my
coffee.

  He sits and does the same.

  Then he looks around him casually again, sees what I saw and lets his eyes come back to me, his face creased into lines of concern. ‘Lily, what the hell is going on? Why did you initiate contact from an airport?’ he asks in a low, urgent tone.

  I take a deep breath. ‘’Cause I fucking need your help, Robin,’ I choke.

  ‘Jesus,’ he says. ‘Oh fuck!’

  I close my eyes.

  ‘Is that a fucking engagement ring on your finger?’ he asks.

  It is hard to tell at a glance since the stone on the engagement ring is so big that there is another plain band there. ‘Yeah, and a wedding ring,’ I say.

  His mouth opens. ‘You better start from the beginning,’ he says cautiously.

  I have a speech prepared. ‘I…er…um… I… Well…uh…ah…um… Fuck, Robin, I went and slept with him and now it’s all a mess.’

  He exhales audibly. ‘Look, it doesn’t matter. You’re not the first agent who has slept with their target. Just, well, just keep your feelings separate.’

  The way a prostitute does, I think, and suddenly I realize I can’t talk to him. I can’t tell him anything. Not a thing. Calling him was definitely a mistake. He doesn’t know that I am bonded with Jake. He doesn’t know that I would die for Jake.

  Robin’s back straightens suddenly and his expression changes into one of alarm. ‘Fuck it, Lily, he’s here,’ he says. He forces his expression back into one of normality and leans back into the leather couch.

  I freeze.

  ‘Anyway, did you know that Andy’s wife has just had a baby?’ he says.

  I want to reply. I want to be normal but I can’t.

  ‘Nine pounds, the nipper was,’ he adds, smiling.

  I open and close my mouth like a demented fish.

  And then the seat next to me depresses and I feel my life spiraling out of control. Slowly, I turn my head and feel a stab of pain in my gut. Jake is nothing like the man I know. I stare at him in perfect astonishment. His eyes are like green ice. Impenetrable. He does not spare me a glance. He has locked eyes with Robin. Hostility and animosity come off him in waves that you can feel and almost touch.

  ‘Introduce me, then, Lily,’ he says silkily, his eyes blazing.

  I sit frozen. Unable to utter a single word.

  Robin is one cool customer. ‘I’m an old classmate of Lily’s. We just bumped into each other. I should be going, really. The wife is waiting at the supermarket,’ he smiles. His smile is just right. His manner is just right, but Jake doesn’t buy it.

  ‘What are you? Her handler?’

  Robin’s look of incredulity is not faked.

  ‘What?’ he says. ‘Look, mate, I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I’m not getting involved. We’re just old friends. I was getting a coffee and I saw Lily. That’s it. I’m off.’ He starts to stand.

  ‘Yes, run away, but if I see you around her again, I swear I’ll break every fucking bone in your body.’ Jake smiles. The smile is pure menace. Why did I think I knew him? I know only the tip of the iceberg. I remember Shane saying, ‘Do you think he treats everyone the way he treats you?’ I stare at him, amazed.

  Robin is on his feet, his hands raised, palms showing. ‘Look, mate, I don’t want no trouble.’

  ‘Fuck off, then.’

  Robin’s eyes bounce to me. I nod quickly, and he leaves.

  Jake turns to look at me. ‘You want to play undercover detective? Be my guest, I can play the fool for you, but if I ever fucking see you meet him or any other man behind my back again you’ll have to watch me fucking kill the cunt,’ he snarls.

  ‘Robin is my go-between.’

  ‘I don’t care what the fuck he is. You want to meet him? Tell me first.’

  It’s so fucked up it’s unreal. He doesn’t care if I want to spy on him, he just doesn’t want me to do it behind his back. It would be laughable if it was not so weird. The only thing I can think of doing is using what has always worked. I touch his groin. Mistake. Big mistake. He grabs my hand, so hard I gasp.

  ‘Don’t, Lil. Don’t degrade what we have.’

  He lets go of my hand suddenly. I rub it. ‘How did you know I was here?’

  ‘How do you think?’

  My eyes widen. ‘What? You’re having me followed?’

  ‘Yes.’ He says it like it is the most natural thing in the world to spy on your girlfriend or wife.

  ‘Why?’ I breathe. Too shocked to be angry.

  ‘Because you got beat up by a pervert. Because I care. Take your fucking pick, Lil.’

  I shake my head as if to clear it. ‘And what about Andrea?’

  His turn to frown. ‘What about her?’

  ‘Didn’t I hear you arrange to meet her for lunch?’ I ask, sarcasm dripping from my voice.

  ‘Andrea is an old family friend. She takes care of my house when I am away. She picks the mail up from the floor and makes sure that no pipes have burst et cetera. I pay her for that. She’s nothing to me.’

  ‘Well, it doesn’t seem like that from where I’m sitting.’

  He frowns. ‘What does it seem like to you?’

  ‘It seems that she is in love with you.’

  ‘Andrea is not in love with me. She’s got her hook in the water for a rich man. And she knows the score with me.’

  ‘Her behavior today was not that of someone who knows the score,’ I remind.

  He shrugs carelessly. ‘All right, I’ll hire someone else.’

  ‘Good,’ I say as nonchalantly as I can, but inside all my cells are coming alive with joy: Not only do I never need to see her snooty, insolent face again, but I won’t have to worry about their relationship anymore either.

  I look at his beautiful face. Even in a public place all I want to do is rub my body against his. I turn away and look at my untouched latte and Robin’s cappuccino. ‘Are you not afraid I will uncover something that will send you to prison?’

  ‘No,’ he says shortly.

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Because, Lily, my dearest, for the past ten years I have extricated myself and my organization from almost all that is illegal. I’ve nothing to fear.’

  ‘What about that bed of money then?’ I challenge.

  ‘Protection money.’

  I frown. ‘You don’t need to collect protection money.’

  ‘It’s true, I don’t need it. It is one of the last bastions of an organization that I want to give up, but it would mean abandoning Eden and Dom’s clubs to other far more dangerous and mercenary rackets.’

  ‘I see.’ But I don’t.

  ‘I’m not a drug dealer, Lil.’

  ‘What came in on the sixteenth, then?’

  He sighs. ‘Contraband. It didn’t just come in on the sixteenth. It comes in all the time. I don’t believe eighty-two percent of the price of anything should be tax. I feel like a modern day Robin Hood when I sell a packet of cigarettes or a bottle of whiskey for the right price.’

  ‘But when we met you told me you were a gangster.’

  He shook his head. ‘You wanted to believe I was one. I just didn’t disabuse you of the idea.’

  ‘Luke told me you wanted to become a vet.’

  ‘Yeah. A long time ago when I thought I could talk to animals and they talked back to me.’

  I cover his hand with mine and tell him the story about the crows. The anger dissipates as I speak. His eyes become warm and full of some strong emotion. ‘My grandmother still has all those shiny objects in a box,’ I finish.

  I see the glimmer of tears in his eyes.

  ‘What is it?’ I ask.

  He shakes his head and for a long time he simply looks at me with an expression I have never seen before. I dare not name it. If it is what I think it is then it will reveal itself in time. I won’t try to second guess it. It would be too frightening to do that in my delicate emotional state.

  ‘Sometimes I don’t know what to make of you, Lil. I’d love to
meet your grandmother some day.’

  ‘That’s what she said,’ I say with a smile.

  He smiles back. ‘Come on, let’s get you home.’

  ‘Sorry, I forgot to ask. Did you manage to solve your mother’s problem?’

  ‘Nope.’

  ‘Oh?’

  ‘Ask me why.’

  I bite my lip. ‘Why?’

  ‘Because while praying she had a vision. She saw me with blood pouring out of my chest and you standing over me. You were the cause.’

  I stare at him in shock. The idea is a terrifying, unimaginable vista. His words are like a monstrous tsunami wave rolling forward to envelop and swallow me whole. Foam and lies crash around me. In sheer panic I gasp a single breath of air. It rushes violently into my lungs. There is ice, too. In my heart.

  ‘I don’t want to hurt you, ever,’ I whisper.

  His eyes suddenly soften. ‘I know,’ he says quietly.

  ‘I’m going to go into work tomorrow. I need to tell them that my cover is blown and that I really need to be taken off this case. In fact, I need to tell them that there is no case. Jake Eden is no kingpin drug dealer.’

  ‘Ah, my little lost lamb. Strayed into a den of wolves, did ya?’

  EIGHT

  Lily

  The next morning Jake kisses me tenderly on the forehead.

  ‘Are you absolutely sure you don’t want this done through a lawyer? All I have to do is pick up a phone and you’ll never need to see any of them ever again.’

  ‘I’m not afraid, Jake. I want to do this.’

  ‘All right, but no matter what happens, never forget I’m here to support you,’ he murmurs. His eyes are intense and full of some strong emotion.

  ‘I think I kinda already know what’s going to happen. I’m gonna get the book thrown at me,’ I say softly.

  ‘Call me when the meeting is over, OK?’

  ‘OK.’

  I dress carefully in a long black skirt, a striped white and gray shirt and a mannish gray jacket. I pull my hair back in a severe bun and stand in front of the mirror. And the mirror says, ‘Slut in disguise.’ I slick on some pale lipstick and I go to my meeting with DS Mills.

  Sitting in the taxi I realize that I don’t feel any emotional attachment to my job or to staying in the force. I have no fear of being disciplined, suspended, or even fired. I look at my hands and they are steady and lying relaxed on my handbag. The calmness stays while I go into the building, up the stairs, and down the familiar corridor to the double stable doors. I have a sudden memory of my first trip here. How nervous I’d been. Getting this job had seemed like the most important thing to me. I smiled to think of me then. I have changed.