Beat of His Heart

by Nickie Nalley Seidler

  “It’s really magical; it’s the weirdest experience I’ve ever had. I’ve never felt this connected to someone.”

  “Maybe it was meant to be.”

  I sat there awhile and went on about Noah to her till we popped open the wine and enjoyed a couple of drinks. Before we knew it, we were passed out on the couch together as the TV was left on. I woke up to the sound of something exploding on the TV. I yawned and looked around as we were sitting in the dark. Sara had a blanket tossed over her with a wine glass in her lap. I took the glass away from her and placed it on the coffee table. I shifted up and placed a pillow by her in case she needed it. She knew she could sleep in the bed with me if she wanted to. I needed my bed. I only wished Noah was lying next to me. That would have made it much better and more comfortable. The fact I was thinking these thoughts already scared me. I’d never felt so much so fast.

  The next day was pretty chill. We stayed inside, occasionally heading to the beach to get some sun in between mimosas and margaritas. I dreamed about Noah a lot. I couldn’t wait till I saw him tomorrow. Sara was only there tomorrow and was leaving the next day. I got in touch with Shelly and Kent and they’re going to meet up with me, Noah and Sara. I was happy to be showing off my life in Florida. I wanted her to see how it was and that I was ok. Now, I was even more than ok. I had Noah and I always had Shelly, plus my parents, who have become scarce in their own life. Tonight, we were going to venture out. I thought we’d just go to the club that I met Noah at since I knew the club a little from that night. Ever since being out in Florida, I hadn’t been to many places so wherever I was familiar with, was the plan.

  “So excited to get some dancing in tonight,” Sara exclaimed.

  “Me too. Just a night out with my bestie.” Smiling, I glanced at her. “I’m going to miss you so much when you go home.”

  “I really wished you still lived near me. I miss so many things about being close to you.”

  We agreed with one another while we reminisced about the past. After getting into a nice outfit for the evening, we took a few selfies in the car before posting them to social media. Noah immediately liked the pictures and it brought a smile to my face. We headed into the club and Sara was already off to the bar to get us a drink. It wasn’t as crowded as the last night I was there, but it was still a good crowd. After grabbing drinks, we headed to the dance floor. Sara and I were homebodies but one thing we loved to do was dance when we were together. It was just something that released good energy.

  My body swayed to the beat of the music and Sara bumped her body into mine. We laughed so loud that we clearly were already enjoying our time together. Thinking about tomorrow being her last day made me sad. After a few drinks the dancing became even more fun. I started to slow my drinks down knowing we had to drive home. I didn’t want to have to take a cab from drinking too much.

  The music pounded and the lights soared over the room. I took it all in and sat at the bar to take a breather as Sara continued to dance her little heart out. I let the momma do just that. Occasionally, she turned looks towards me to make sure we knew where one another was. After looking all around the room, I saw a man in the distance and I thought nothing of it till I looked again and noticed it was Noah. He was talking to another woman with his hand on the small of her back. It looked like they were in a deep conversation, before he kissed her cheek and walked away. Before long the woman went chasing after him and they exited into an office in the back. My heart sunk.

  I rushed over to Sara. “Sara, we have to go.”

  “What? Why?” she yelled over the blaring music.

  “I just saw Noah with another woman. We need to go now.”

  “Come on, Amy, we’re having fun.” She drank a shot a guy handed her as she still swayed to the music, oblivious to what I just told her.

  My heart was racing so hard at what I just discovered. I had no idea what the hell was going on. I knew Noah frequented this place as I remembered him telling me that when we met. But I had never thought he’d still come after the feelings he was having for me. Then again, I questioned why I was even there. Although, I was dancing just with Sara. I wasn’t with any other man. My mind ran rampant because I was just so confused. I was trying not to read more into the situation but I could only assume what I saw. The woman I saw was close to him. She was hot too which made it worse. Way hotter than I was.

  “Sara!” I yelled.

  She nodded until a man wrapped his arms around my hips from behind and made me start dancing. I glanced over my shoulder and saw it was some strange man I hadn’t seen before.

  “Just go with it!” Sara yelled as she smiled, dancing in front of me.

  I took a breath and was getting irritated. But I went with it, for Sara. Because after all, I was there for her to enjoy a night. I put what I saw in the back of my mind.

  That was until the man’s hands started roaming around my body. I turned around right as he grabbed my ass. My hand sprung back and right into his face as I slapped him. Hard.

  “Fuck off, dude!” I screamed at him. I looked in his eyes as he seemed shocked. He touched his face and felt the sting. That’s when Sara grabbed my hand and as I turned, he was there. Noah was there pushing this guy and pushing him hard out of the club. I began to get extremely confused. I grabbed Sara’s hand and rushed in the other direction of the back door as she followed closely behind me. The second we landed out the door Sara hurled over the corner.

  “Are you ok?” I watched as she was hunched over. I pulled up her hair behind her as I knew what was coming next.

  “I’m o-k…” And the puke came.

  “Amy!” I heard Noah’s voice from behind.

  Sara stood up and wiped her mouth. “I’m just going to go wait in the car.”

  “No, it’s ok, let’s get you home.” I started to walk with Sara, before Noah grabbed my arm gently.

  “Amy, are you ok?”

  “I’m fine. You didn’t need to do that. I can handle myself,” I spat, slightly upset as I still had no idea why he did that, nor why he was there with some woman.

  “Please, stop. What’s wrong? Why are you running away from me?”

  I looked at Sara, and she continued on to the car with an approving nod toward me to talk with Noah. As much as I wanted to know, I didn’t want to talk with Noah right now. I was having a sort of freak out moment and I just wanted to head home.

  “I saw her, Noah, it’s ok. I get it.”

  “Saw her?” Noah’s eyes searched mine as he seemed confused. He ran his hand through his hair before the light bulb clicked on.

  “No, no, no, Amy. Baby, there’s no her.” He grabbed my hand and took me into a hug, squeezing me into his tight chest.

  “I don’t understand.”

  “Let me come over tonight, ok? Let me explain. Please, there’s nothing to be worried about. I promise you.”

  “I don’t know, I have Sara, she’s in rough shape.” I looked over towards my car as she looked passed out.

  “See, she’s asleep. She’ll pass out at home. Please, let me come over. I can be there in two hours. Will you wait for me?”

  I looked into his eyes as they sparkled back at me. I couldn’t resist. I wanted to know what was going on and mostly I wanted to spend time with him. “Ok. Why can’t you leave now?”

  “This is my club, Amy. I have a few things to close up and I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

  My mouth dropped open. I looked at Noah then back at the club then back at Noah, putting two and two together. “Wait…”

  “I want to tell you all of this the right way. So please, let’s talk later ok?”

  “Ok.” I half smiled.

  Noah kissed my forehead then gently pressed his lips to mine. “See you later.”

  “Bye.” I kissed him back, then headed back to my car to notice Sara really was asleep.

  I got in and buckled her in before buckling myself. I let out a huge sigh as I sat there a moment, wondering what I was reall
y getting myself into. At the moment, I didn’t even have my best friend to talk to about it as she was drunk and passed out in my passenger seat. Feeling completely sober, I put the car in drive and headed home. I received a message from Olivia as I pulled into the parking garage under my condo building. I wasn’t sure how I was going to manage to get Sara upstairs, but I assumed I had to wake her up and hope she cooperated.

  My spot was super close to the elevator. I nudged Sara and she moaned slightly. Quickly bolting out of the car and to her side, I opened her door and positioned her to get out. If she was going to puke again, it wasn’t going to be in my car. She woke up and looked at me through her groggy eyes.

  “We’re home, sweet cheeks. Let’s go.” I grabbed her arm, helping her out of the car.

  “Where’s Noah?” she asked, looking around.

  “He’s at the club. Let’s get you upstairs, drunkie.” I giggled as I held her in my one arm, closing the door with the other as we made our way upstairs.

  “I’m sorry I drank so much.”

  “You were enjoying yourself. No need to apologize.”

  I helped her into her pajamas as we weren’t going to bother showering when she could barely stand up. I made her bed on the couch since I knew Noah was going to come by. I didn’t want to disturb her sleep with us talking. I texted him quickly that I was home and that I’d leave the door unlocked to come in quietly so Sara didn’t wake. I hopped in the shower since I knew I had a while before he arrived. Rinsing my body off with cool water, I took in the moment. What the fuck happened tonight? I saw Noah with some woman who he claimed was nothing, then I learned he owned the club? How did he manage a club and work at the firehouse? I was really curious as to what he had to tell me. I hoped it didn’t jeopardize us in any way because I was really starting to get comfortable with having him around. I sounded like a moron, but I knew what I felt inside.

  Drying the water off my skin, I slid into my silk black shorts and matching silk pajama blouse. I wrapped the towel in my hair to let it dry while I laid on the bed and opened my phone. I re-read the message Olivia sent. She said that there was some kind of letter that came for me and was forwarding it to me in the mail. I had no idea what the heck would have gotten sent to Olivia in New York. I responded to her quickly and thanked her for forwarding the letter. I didn’t know much else to say at that point.

  Olivia and I hadn’t spoken much since I moved to Florida. I didn’t know if she was upset with me or what. I tried to keep in touch with her, but she didn’t seem like she wanted to. I dropped it and moved on with my life. It was what I needed; to move on and I didn’t need her bringing me down either. I had to let go of my past. My thoughts quickly drifted to Brad. I hoped I was doing right by him even though he wasn’t there anymore. I’d love to believe he would have approved of my relationship with Noah. I knew everything was too soon. I knew that what we had was too soon to predict anything. Tears slid down my cheeks. I really missed Brad.

  I curled up to my pillow, hugging it tightly, as I cried about Brad. It had been a really long time since I’ve cried about Brad it seemed. I didn’t want to feel I had to cry about him, but I truly missed him. I was happy that a part of Noah seemed to fill that void. But I was worried. My heart ached because I wasn’t sure if I was just filling that void, or if Noah really meant something.

  The bed dipped next to me suddenly and I felt Noah’s cold hands reach around me, pressing himself to me in a hug.

  “Noah! You scared me.” I turned over and wiped my eyes.

  “Babe, why are you crying?” he whispered, wiping my tears away before pulling me closer to him. He kissed my forehead gently.

  “Nothing.” I shook my head trying to dismiss my thoughts.

  “Tears aren’t nothing. Talk to me. Please, Amy.” He pulled the towel down off my hair and let it hang half wet along my shoulders. Pushing it out of my eyes, the touch of his fingers on my skin made me feel warm.

  “Just thinking of my ex, that’s all. Sometimes I just randomly think about him. I don’t expect you to understand.”

  “Amy, I want to understand. You need to know I’m here right now because I want to be a part of your life. I want to be that guy.”

  I sat up in the bed and lifted my legs up to my chest. Noah then moved right next to me in the same position I was in.

  “I want to be that for you, too, Noah. I know things are supposed to go slow in these relationship things.” I giggled under my breath.

  “About earlier…” He sighed. “That was Melody. Melody is my business partner. Believe me when I tell you, you have nothing to worry about with me and definitely not with her.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me about the club before?”

  “I didn’t know how you were going to take to it. I know I assumed the worst, and I should have told you, but it’s a growing business there, and it takes a lot of my time along with the firehouse.”

  “You never get women throwing themselves on you? I mean, you’re far from anything ugly, Noah. It must happen.”

  “Babe, you have nothing to worry about. My eyes are on you. My focus is on you. The connection that I feel with you, that’s not something I’m going to screw up. I feel this…” He motioned at the space between us and my breath hitched, because I felt it too. Not only did we have the sexual tension, but we had the connection I haven’t felt before.

  “I feel it, too.” I rubbed his leg up and down. I took in what he was wearing. This deep royal blue shirt with black dress pants. His shirt was unbuttoned at the top showing me his chiseled chest.

  “Amy, I don’t know how to do this slowly with you. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was falling for you in some kind of way that I hadn’t felt before either. I know it’s fast, and I don’t do fast usually, but I can’t do slow with you.”

  Our breathing picked up pace as we stared into each other’s eyes. I could feel the pool start between my legs as this man was doing things to me. We both couldn’t deny this feeling.

  My lips found his quickly and I inhaled his cologne while his tongue danced with mine.

  “Right now, fast is ok with me,” as I kissed him again roaming my hand down his leg and back up. My hand forming to the curve of his firm ass. The edge of his arousal grazed my mid drift, the fabric of his pants providing little camouflage for what his zipper contained.

  I was caught between my desire to have him shed every stitch of clothing and take me as quickly as we both needed so badly, and wanting to savor every touch, kiss, and breathless moan that fell between us. His skillful fingers undid the buttons of my pajama blouse. His fingers were almost quaking with urgency as the last button was freed. I noticed the gleam in his eye as he paused to soak me in. I was thankful that I had bothered with no bra. The flick of his thumb pad over my nipples sent a shiver to my core.

  His head lowered to my breasts. His tongue slipped between his lips to my nipples. I couldn't help but gasp from the intimate caress. My hips squirmed and bucked. I needed to feel the heat of his skin; raking my hands up from his bottom, I pulled his shirt from the waistband of his pants. I could feel the muscles of his back corded and firm. Skin smooth like fondant on a decorated cake, my mouth watered thinking of tasting him.

  The pleasure of my nipples was suddenly void as Noah sat up between my legs, resting on his heels. My knees nearly hugged his ribs as the sound of shirt buttons popped and pinged off the bedside lamp, and table and landed on the floor. My eyes were on his, the colors of his irises deeper than I had observed in our short time of knowing each other. Slowly my gaze scanned downward, drinking in Noah's torso. The low light in the room cast shadows of light and dark over the planes of his chest. Excitement and desire mingled like a potent cocktail that seemed bottomless. I ran my hand over a scar I saw on his chest and kissed it, giving it attention. Letting him know I knew he had a past, which I needed to venture into someday. That I was appreciating it.

  Without thought or care, I reached for the buckle of his leather belt. Qu
ickly working the cool metal and soft leather, I slid it from the loops with a swoosh. I wanted him. I hadn't wanted any man like I wanted Noah except... No, not going there, giving myself a mental shake to stay focused on the NOW not THEN. My fingers grazed the hardness of his penis as I unzipped his fly. His black boxer briefs left little question as to what they barely restricted.

  He pushed his pants down along with the elastic band of his briefs. Swallowing, I couldn't help but wet my lips. I didn't care about how fast we were moving. I didn't care if we were on a speeding train that would likely derail! I wanted Noah! I wanted to feel his weight on me, pressing me into the mattress. Our bodies were slick with sweat when we would soon be joined together and moving in rhythm. Without words from him, I felt his thumbs go under my panties, hooking them, as he peeled them over my hips. Instinctively, my legs curled toward me and away from his waist before he slipped them free from my ankles.

  Parting my legs wider, I invited him inside me. After he pushed his length deep inside, I let out a growl, a moan, a need that I wanted met so badly. He was fulfilling everything that I wanted. He slowly started to rock back and forth pressing inside me. My hands slid around his waist and then up his back, gripping hard as I rocked in motion with him. The closer I got to coming, the more my legs tightened around his waist as he pounded into me.

  The second I released, I felt the pressure of him releasing before collapsing on top of me. His kisses trailed my jawline to my neck, gently pressing his soft kisses against my smooth skin.

  “You are amazing,” I whispered into his ear.

  “No, baby, you are what makes me amazing.” He kissed my lips tenderly. “You bring out the good in me.”

  He pulled me close next to him before my eyes shut from pure exhaustion.

  Last night was incredible. Not only was Noah swoon worthy, taking every possible chance he could to please me. But every time I’m with him, we grow closer and closer together. He slept next to me like he was never going to let me go. I loved this tingly feeling I was getting about him. This constant over the top euphoric feeling.