Friends and Lovers Trilogy 03 - Seduced

by Beth Ciotta

  As much as she tried to feign conviction, her voice trembled. “Last night was a mistake.”

  “No, it was inevitable.”

  She shook her head, choked out another lie. “I don’t want this. I don’t want you.”

  “Wrong again.” He stepped into the shower fully clothed. The moment he laid hands on her she was lost. He pulled her into his arms and ravaged her mouth with a punishing kiss. Brutally possessive. Terrifying in its intensity. Hot water pummeled their bodies, yet it was Joe’s stormy kiss that washed away one failed affair after another, leaving her as untainted and vulnerable as a newborn.

  His strong hands framed her face as he eased back and issued a throaty challenge. “Look me in the eyes, Sofia, and tell me you don’t want me.”

  She gripped his shoulders to keep from sliding down the wall. Her bones had dissolved with most of her brain cells. They were crammed into an acrylic shower module, water blasting from the super pressure showerhead. He was soaked, his shirt and jeans plastered to his skin, his testosterone level fierce enough to warp the frosted pane of the door. Hands down, this was the sexiest moment of her life. The need to join with this man, here, now, was excruciating. “What I want,” she managed past the lump in her throat, “is a normal relationship.”

  His gaze slipped to her tingling mouth. “Describe normal.”

  “A relationship based on mutual respect and adoration. A relationship based on love. Not lust,” she clarified as every nerve ending pulsed with maddening desire, “love. But what I want, and what I seem destined to have are two different things.”

  Joe stared down at her with a mixture of anger and pity. “Who the hell brainwashed you into thinking you don’t deserve to be loved?”

  Her body trembled with the God-awful truth. “Every man I ever cared about, and who claimed to care about me.”

  He dropped his forehead to hers, cursed under his breath. She felt the tension in his shoulders, in the air. “I’ve got news for you, babe. Sometimes lust and love come in one package.”

  Apprehension stiffened her spine even as hope blossomed in her chest. “I’m not ready to risk it.”

  “I am.”

  No mercy. The man showed no mercy whatsoever, blindsiding her with another torrid kiss. She tried to fight the sensations, the primal calling. Damn him, she thought hazily as he plundered her mouth, his lips and tongue pirating the last of her clear thoughts.

  One hand molded to the back of her neck, while the other roamed her wet, naked curves. His fingers trailed up her thighs, caressed her slick heat. She clung while he stroked her to climax, groaned when he kissed a hot trail to her breast and suckled.

  Breathless and desperate with raw need, she shoved him back and ripped open his shirt. Buttons flew. She nipped and kissed his shoulders, his chest, while deftly working his fly. In a heated blur, she shoved the sodden jeans down his lean hips to his ankles, wrapped her hand around his delicious cock and sighed with the anticipation of making this man plead for mercy. She wanted to pleasure him, to torture him as he’d tortured her, and her mouth was the ultimate weapon.

  Her mind glitched when he grasped her forearms and pulled her to her feet. “Not now,” he rasped, while spinning her around to face the wall. He grasped both of her wrists with one hand, anchored them high above her head. Her body quaked with anticipation as he smoothed his free palm down her back and paid lingering homage to her ass, before nudging her legs wide.

  Sweat beaded on her forehead as the hot water pulsed and steam swirled. Her stomach knotted and her thighs quivered as his skilled fingers worked erotic magic. “Joe, please … I …” She gasped when the tip of his shaft grazed her pulsing folds, cried out when he slid home. Her heart raced as he drove into her hard and fast, again and again. He pressed his upper body flush against her back, and she trembled beneath his solid strength. Her breath stalled when he kissed the back of her neck, bit her shoulder, and whispered graphic instructions close to her ear.

  This was nothing like last night. This was hot and dirty. He pounded her mercilessly until she screamed his name and her body quaked with an earth-rocking orgasm.

  Sweet Jesus. She couldn’t think. She couldn’t move. Her eyes glazed over when Joe turned off the faucet and swept her up in his arms. Her pulse thrummed when he carried her into the bedroom and laid her gently on the bed.

  “That was lust,” he said, reclaiming her body in a position as old as time. “This is love.” He smoothed her wet hair from her cheeks and gazed deeply into her eyes as he entered her once more. Only this time he made love—slow, deep, and with a tenderness that brought tears to her eyes.

  She’d never felt anything like it. This crazy mix of sensual and sweet. Maybe he’s right, she thought as she pulled his head down for a soulful kiss. Maybe this was love.

  He knew the moment she gave in, the moment she relinquished her heart. He saw it in her eyes, felt it in her touch. She wrapped her long legs around him, matched his languid rhythm. Her hands floated up and over his shoulders to cup the back of his head, and then she kissed him, a leisurely, impassioned kiss that pushed him over the edge. He’d never felt anything like it. This yearning, this bone-deep affection. She peaked and he followed. One last thrust and he was spent. Sweet Christ. Euphoria followed by contentment. So, this was what had his cynical brother spouting sappy drivel.

  His joy was short lived.

  A tear slipped through Sofia’s lowered lashes and his heart slowed to a grinding halt. Had he been too rough in the shower? The way she’d responded, he’d assumed she was turned on. But, Christ, what if he’d been wrong? What if he’d let passion cloud his judgment.

  “Oh, God, Joe. What have we done?”

  In an instant, he realized he had indeed allowed his heart to rule his head. He’d forgotten a condom. Well, damn. He thumbed away her tears. “Sofia, I …”

  “I know. I didn’t think about it either. It happened so fast. I should get up and … ” She bit her lower lip, glanced away. “I should clean up.”

  He stroked a thumb over her cheek, strived for calm in the face of a potential crisis. “Does this mean you’re not on the pill?”

  She shook her head. “After Chaz, I vowed off sex for a year. I wanted to prove to myself that I wasn’t addicted to sex. I wanted to prove that I didn’t need to be in a relationship to be happy.”

  Stunned, he absorbed and examined the news. How had he ever thought this complicated woman shallow? He couldn’t help asking, “How long has it been?”

  “Eight months.”

  “Were you happy?”

  At last she met his gaze. “Most of the time.”

  Knowing that she hadn’t been with anyone in months selfishly rocked his world. “I’m trying to feel guilty about making you break your vow, but it’s not working.”

  Her full lips curled into a sad smile. “I really need to get up.”

  Cursing himself as an insensitive jerk, he rolled off of her and watched as she snatched up her robe and escaped into the bathroom. She closed the door and he swung up into a sitting position. What the hell was wrong with him? He’d screwed up royally, yet he was having a hard time feeling bad. It had been a very long time since he’d felt this good. It wasn’t just the sex, although, damn, it had been nothing short of amazing. It was the emotional aspect, the connection he felt with Sofia that pegged this as a life-altering moment.

  It wasn’t the first time he’d told a woman he loved her. He, like Sofia, had been in more than a few relationships, one of them serious. But, he’d never been so obsessed. So consumed. He’d never lost himself so completely in the moment as to forget protection. What if he’d gotten her pregnant? Again, he was having a hard time feeling bad.

  Well, hell.

  The door opened. Sofia stepped out looking particularly young and vulnerable. The pale blue robe complimented her dark skin. Her purple hair, though not as vivid as yesterday, proved an interesting contrast. Still damp, she’d combed the thick, shoulder-length mass back and
behind her ears, exposing that gorgeous face. The face that would haunt his dreams for eternity. His heart slammed against his ribs when she regarded him with a shy smile. “Bathroom’s all yours. Can I pour you a cup of coffee?”

  He blinked at her calm demeanor. So different from the angry, fiery woman he’d mauled in the shower. He dragged his hand over his wet hair, collected his thoughts, and stood. “We need to talk, hon.”

  “I know … I just … could we talk over breakfast? I’m starving.”

  Hallelujah. Getting food into this perpetually dieting woman took priority. Their discussion could wait. “Dig in.” He squeezed her hand as he walked past. “I’ll be right out.” He paused before shutting the bathroom door. “And coffee would be great. Thanks. I take it …”

  “Black. I noticed yesterday.”

  He was still smiling when he moved to the sink to wash up. The fact that she wasn’t cursing him or sobbing uncontrollably was a promising sign. He turned on the faucet and grabbed a washcloth and soap.

  So, where did they go from here? He wasn’t about to ask her to give up her career, even though he wished she would. He couldn’t help feeling the entertainment industry was a destructive environment for someone as sensitive as Sofia. She cared and felt deeply. In turn, her outbursts were melodramatic by most people’s standards.

  Joe found those flashes of sarcasm and temper challenging. He realized now that simple and peaceful had never been his ideal. Murphy was right. He’d spent the last several months avoiding rather than handling life. He’d been wallowing in self-pity while Sofia had made a self-improving vow and attacked a dream with conviction. It was a sobering realization.

  Contemplating the future, he returned to the bedroom and tugged on shorts and dry trousers.

  “It’s good,” Sofia said, around a mouthful of food. “Cold, but good.”

  “Hard to go wrong with an omelet.” He tugged a T-shirt over his head and moved to sit across from her. “Sorry about the toast. I ordered it dry, but …”

  “That’s okay,” she bit into a butter-slathered slice, and smiled. “Fattening, but good.”

  He sipped his coffee and watched as the woman ate with gusto. Not wanting to spoil her appetite, he picked at his own omelet and enjoyed the view. Having breakfast with Sofia Marino. He could get used to this. “Sofia, about what I did in the shower …”

  “It was very sexy.”

  “Yeah?”

  Her lips twitched. “I take back the fuddy-duddy crack.”

  A trace of a grin touched his lips before he sobered. He swiped both hands over his face, steeled himself for part two. “About …”

  “I don’t think I’m … I think we’re okay.” She laid aside her fork, hooked the coffee mug with slender fingers. “My cycle, the timing, I don’t think I’m ovulating.”

  Leave it to Sofia to be blunt.

  “I just panicked for a minute. I thought about it when I was in the bathroom, and I think we’re okay. Besides, one time.” She shrugged. “What are the chances?”

  “I know you’re not that naïve.” He watched as she lifted the mug to her lips, noticed the slight trembling of her hand. Okay, so maybe she wasn’t so calm.

  She sipped, regarded him over the rim. “I’m not pregnant.”

  “What if you are?”

  “I’m not.”

  He studied her at length, keyed in on a pattern. “This isn’t real. This isn’t happening.”

  Her cheeks flushed. “What?”

  “You’ve said that a couple of times over the past two days. Like a mantra.” He leaned forward and laid his right hand over her left. “You can’t wish something away, Sofia.”

  She slowly set down her coffee, her gaze riveted on the hunter green mug. “According to Rudy, affirmations are powerful. See it, be it. I guess, subconsciously, I hoped it would work in reverse. I wanted to spin reality into a bad dream.”

  “Better to face your demons and conquer them, hon. Otherwise, they’ll linger or sneak back when you’re least expecting and bite you in the ass. It’s something I’m just realizing myself.” He smoothed his thumb over her knuckles. “We’re heading back to Phoenix today. We’re going to face what you’ve blocked out, together. Later, if it turns out you’re pregnant, we’ll face that together too.”

  “Later?” She met his gaze, crinkled her forehead. “You mean you want to continue this,” she fluttered a hand, “whatever it is, after we solve the mystery?”

  She blinked back tears, and his heart cracked. “I didn’t make that clear?”

  “Last night when I asked how long you’d be around? You said, ‘as long as you need me’. I just thought … ” She refocused on the mug, traced a finger around the rim. “It’s pretty standard in my world. Actors work together on a project. Weeks go by, sometimes months. It’s like living in this bubble. Friendships form, affairs flare. They seem genuine, but then the production ends and, well, people drift.”

  “You think what’s happening between us is a result of being thrown together in a highly stressful situation? Once the adventure’s over the thrill is gone? Something like that?”

  “I just know that things aren’t always what they seem.”

  Then it clicked. Her reluctance to accept his amorous feelings as gospel, unfortunately, made perfect sense. She knew that he’d weaseled his way into the Falcone family by conning Julietta into believing he loved her. She’d been disgusted by his behavior. The lie. He’d been disgusted too. But, he’d been focused on the greater good. Christ, no wonder she didn’t trust him. “As long as we’re talking about worlds, maybe this would be a good time to clear the air about Julietta.”

  Her gaze flew to his. Sympathy swirled in those big brown eyes. Sympathy and kindness. “You aren’t responsible for that woman’s death, Joe.”

  “A wise person once said to me, and I quote: ‘Logically, I know that. But surely you of all people understand why I feel somewhat responsible’.”

  She flipped her hand over so that their palms connected, curled her fingers around his hand in silent unity.

  Touched, he forced a smile and continued. “That same wise person pointed out, just yesterday as a matter of fact, that I’ve spent the last few months dodging life.”

  She blushed. “So, on top of all your other talents, you have total memory recall?”

  “Let’s just say important things stick.” He rolled his head to ease a kink. “Christ, I really don’t want to talk about this, but I need you to understand, Sofia. What I did, conning Julietta, I did in the line of duty. I didn’t feel good about it, but then again, over the years I’ve pulled some damned unethical stunts in order to eliminate some sick, dangerous scum. I had every intention …” he paused, closed his eyes, and summoned composure. Battling guilt and self-disgust, he refocused on Sofia. “I had every intention of letting her down easy. Once the sting was over, I planned to get her into counseling. She had an insecurity issue that exacerbated her drug and alcohol problem. I wanted to help, but …”

  “She wouldn’t let you.”

  “When she learned of my betrayal, she took refuge in her great-uncle’s home. The Falcone ranks closed in. I couldn’t get to her. I told myself maybe it was for the better. A clean break. I figured she’d be pissed at me for awhile and then move on to a new boyfriend. She’d moved on plenty of times before. Meanwhile, I hoped one of her uncles would bully her into laying off the booze and drugs.” He frowned. “A few weeks later, she overdosed.”

  “You’ve been punishing yourself ever since.” Sofia shook her head. “I feel so heartless for chastising you like I did last fall. I didn’t know all the facts. Frankly, I didn’t care. I was having a hard time … Chaz had just … well, he lied to me. I still can’t believe I fell for his bullshit. What’s worse, it wasn’t the first time I’d been duped by a man.” She rolled her eyes. “I can’t believe I’m telling you this. I never confided in anyone, not even Lulu. But since we’re clearing the air, I want you to know why I was so hostile.”
r />   “You don’t owe me …”

  “Please. Let me get it out. Chaz told me he loved me, promised me the moon personally and professionally. Meanwhile, he promised several other actresses on his roster the same thing.” She groaned. “I was a blind fool.”

  “No. You were trusting. You believed the best in someone who claimed to care about you. In that regard, you’re very much like your sister. All that optimism,” he said, quoting her from last night. “Priceless.”

  And Chaz Bradley had taken advantage. Joe fisted his free hand in his lap. He’d clocked the bastard once. He should’ve done worse. “I knew Bradley was a prick the moment I laid eyes on him.” He frowned. “Okay. So I can see where you’d compare me to the guy.”

  “Yes, well there’s a big difference between the two of you. I know that now. You actually feel bad about what you did. But quitting your job, Joe, a vital job. Was that really necessary?”

  “I quit the Bureau because I didn’t like who I’d become, the depths I’d sink to to make a bust. I needed time away, time to reevaluate my life.”

  “And I interrupted the process.”

  “No, you kicked the process into high gear.” He wasn’t one for talking out his problems, wasn’t one for laying his emotional cards on the table, but he’d come this far. This woman, who’d been jerked around by a string of men, deserved complete honesty. “Sofia, I understand your reservations, but I assure you my feelings are genuine. Deep down, I was, I am hoping you’ll need me for a very long time.” He interlaced his fingers with hers, crawled out on a limb. “Like … forever.”

  She tried to pull away, but he held her firm. “Please, don’t joke about that,” she said in a soft voice. “Out of the several months we’ve known each other we’ve spent, what, maybe sixty hours together? Once you get to know me better, you may end up hating me. Maybe you’ll grow bored. Crave variety.”

  Inwardly, he cursed Chaz Bradley and every other bastard who’d treated her poorly. “Not gonna happen.”