Hellcats: Anthology

by Kate Pickford

  “Tofu, my little catling, is a lump of soy, that’s a plant, that has no flavor, no texture, and no shape. Whatever you put it with, it takes on those traits. If you cook it, it tastes like whatever was in the pot. Many humans love it. I tried it once. Yech. I’d rather eat worms.

  “Tofu, who was once called Marmalade because he was an orange tabby, before he started dying his hair white, is the same. Flavorless, brainless, does whatever anyone around him is doing. He pretends to be a big tough Tom because up until right before you were hatched—”

  “Hey, I wasn’t hatched,” Mewly piped up loudly.

  “Just making sure you’re paying attention. Right before you were born, we lost a great Tom. Maybe the greatest Tom ever. He was the only cat I ever knew to bloody Tinkerbell’s nose and live to tell about it. Cinnamon was his name, but we mostly called him Cinny.

  “He could catch more birds and tease more bugs than any cat I ever met. He could find more mice and spiders, yowl louder and longer… He was just better at catting than other cats. He never let a soul get away. Cinny was a Tom’s Tom. He was a friend and I admired him.

  “Tofu thought that when Cinny died, he would be the one to step up, be the new Tom. Things didn’t quite work that way. I’m not positive, but I think Tofu had something to do with Cinny’s death. That Tom was too fast and too smart to be hit by a car.

  “But to answer your question— I call him that because like tofu, Tofu is nothing on his own, by himself. Tofu hates that. Which makes me like it even more. Avoid him and that lump Rusher. Nothing but trouble, those two. Now, follow me but be quiet. We have an unscheduled stop to make. And lessons to be learned. Steel your heart little one.”

  “Are ya sure Boss?” Rusher asked. “What if he don’t stop for a drink tonight?”

  “Then we make sure Tinkerbell’s gate gets left open at the right time,” Tofu said. “They drink from this spring every night on their way back. It’s like a ritual for him. It used to be him and Cindy. Now it’s him and that runt thing with the ugly nose.”

  “She’s got an awfully strong rope boss. It ain’t gonna break anytime soon,” Rusher said.

  “It’s a wonder you can move all four feet without tripping. We cut the rope Rusher. Well, you cut the rope, but it’s the same thing in the end,” Tofu said. “If he doesn’t stop for a drink, we lure him into Tinkerbell’s yard. I’ll let him almost catch me, getting away just in time naturally, and you cut her rope so she can kill Shadow. You can remember all that, can’t you? In fact, go cut the rope now.”

  It should have been him that took Cinny’s place, not that flea-ridden Shadow. The big black idiot didn’t even want it; to be the Tom. Who wouldn’t want to be the Tom? Less work, more food. More naps. More everything. Tonight he and Rusher would set everything right.

  The other Soul Cats ignored Marmalade. No one came to him the way they should. The way he deserved. They would all see different soon, see that he was the only cat for the job. Maybe he could have been a little more patient and let Cinny die of old age, but the cat just kept on living. He had to have gone through far more than just the nine allotted. It had been a service really, giving him that poisoned mouse. Somebody needed to do it and he, Marmalade, was the only one cat enough for the job.

  There was no fence marking the boundary of Clancy’s yard. A berry bramble the size of a barn grew where the back fence used to be. The forest began where the cleared land ended. Even that was more weeds than grass. Clancy didn’t take care of the place the way his father and grandfather had.

  Rusty, broken-down farm machinery dotted the property. Twenty-year-old bales of dried-out hay filled the loft in the barn. Tools that hadn’t been touched in two decades hung in the wooden racks Clancy and his father built when Clancy was a boy, back when he liked animals. The skeletons of horses and cows lay in heaped piles of sad bones in the stalls where they died when Clancy stopped feeding them.

  “Are we going to the Tail House?” Mewly asked a little while later.

  “And what makes you think that?” Shadow asked. The catling was surprising him more and more. There was no fear in his little voice. He was smarter than he looked too.

  Mewly thought carefully before he answered. He wanted Shadow to be proud of him.

  “Because the only thing on this deer trail, besides the big berry bramble, is the green house you said never to go near. Some of the other Soul Cats say the man there kills us for fun. Then he cuts our tails off and hangs them on his shed. They said one whole wall is covered in cat tails. Is it really Shadow?”

  “Yes, but it’s not just cats. We’re his favorite targets, but he’ll kill anything he sees. Squirrels, rabbits, hawks, owls, anything.”

  “Then why are we going there, Shadow?”

  “To do something that isn’t supposed to be done but is long overdue. To say goodbye to someone I forgot and shouldn’t have.”

  “Oh.” They padded silently a few more steps. “What’s overdue Shadow?” Mewly asked.

  “Something that should have happened but didn’t. If the sun didn’t rise by mid-day, it would be overdue. Do you understand?”

  “Something that should have happened…that hasn’t happened…that is going to happen?” Mewly asked. He was confused.

  “Hmmm. Sort of. I’m going to do something I should have done a long time ago. What I’m going to do is overdue.”

  “Oh. That makes sense. What are you going to do?” Mewly asked. He was getting excited now.

  “Take revenge and achieve justice little catling. Hopefully soothe an old friend’s soul. You’re going to help me. I’m going to teach you one of the forbidden things. This thing is so forbidden there isn’t even a rule against it. It might kill both of us, but if it works the souls of many will rest easier.”

  “Oh. Shadow?”

  “Yes Mewly? What is it this time, my little question factory?”

  “I need to poop.”

  “Marmalade, that’s not Shadow. Shouldn’t we stop her?” Rusher asked.

  “What? And ruin the surprise? Not a chance. The odds of her finding our bait and taking it are…well I don’t know the right word, but they’re high. What’s a housecat like her doing way down here anyway? It was obviously meant to be.”

  “Huh?” Rusher asked. He was a little smarter than Marmalade, but so were most mosquitos.

  Mystique was beautiful. Her long, stippled hair was always perfect, never a snarl or snag. Her green eyes were big enough to hold the entire moon in their glow and her meow could bring males from miles around. Her tail, when she fluffed it out, was the most beautiful thing Marmalade had ever seen. She was too young and stuck up to notice him, but that was alright. Pretty soon she’d never notice anything ever again. Serve her right for having a crush on Shadow. Her and all her teenage housecat friends practically worshiped him. It was disgusting.

  Marmalade purred happily while he watched her drink from the spring he and Rusher had poisoned. He knew Shadow liked her, even if she was a housecat. Who wouldn’t? She was the most beautiful cat he had ever seen. This couldn’t have worked out better if he had planned it.

  “Through that hole in the bramble. Clancy leaves it so animals can get into his yard,” Shadow said. It stretched all the way across the backyard and almost as high as the sycamore branches swaying twenty feet above it.

  “I thought he didn’t want anything in his yard,” Mewly said. He was confused again.

  “He doesn’t want anything living in his yard, but he doesn’t mind them coming in. He can kill them easier that way. Why go hunting when prey will come right to you?” Shadow asked.

  “What are you going to do Shadow? Won’t Snorkle chase us?” Mewly asked. The idea of being chased by big long-legged dogs scared the kitty-biscuits out of him.

  “Sorrel. His name was Sorrel. He wasn’t a bad dog; he just made a bad choice a long time ago. Dogs are the only animals I’ve ever heard of that care more about men than they do themselves. It’s hard for a sensible cat to underst
and. Clancy tricked him, pretending to be friendly and nice when he was neither. Dogs can be stupidly loyal to people. When they give you their heart it’s forever,” Shadow said. “I should have done this when it would have mattered to Sorrel. Tonight will have to do.”

  Shadow and his shadow snuck through the thorns and twisty branches of the berry bramble barricade, hardly losing more than a pawful of hair. They slunk low to the ground along the shadows the long bush made in the starlight until they reached the wall of tails.

  “Take a good look Mewly. If you get lazy this is what happens. There’s always something ready to eat you if you’re not paying attention.”

  Mewly looked at the wall in awe. There were dozens and dozens of tails nailed to it. Some were so old they were nothing but shreds of skin stretched over sun-bleached bones. He sat on his little haunches and made a sad noise that was neither mewl nor purr.

  “I don’t understand Shadow,” he said.

  “Nor do I. Some people, some things, are just mean. They don’t like or care about anyone except themselves. Sometimes, like with Clancy here, they hate so hard that all they can do is destroy. It’s terrible,” Shadow said softly.

  “Shadow?” Mewly asked.

  “Yes Mewly,” Shadow answered, accepting again that Mewly would always have questions.

  “Why are we here?”

  “Follow me and I’ll show you.”

  They walked the shadows until they could see the back door and the stairs that led to it. In front of the stairs was a dilapidated doghouse missing half its roof. The stench coming from it almost made Mewly throw up.

  “What’s that smell Shadow. It’s terrible.”

  “Come little one. Hold your breath if you must. It won’t take long.”

  Shadow led Mewly into the decrepit doghouse. The little cat fought not to throw up. Sorrel was inside. Sorrel wasn’t ever leaving again.

  “Take a close look little one. This is what death looks like. This is what sticking to a bad decision looks like,” Shadow said.

  Mewly crept closer, kitten-step by kitten-step. When he finally saw Sorrel’s face, bloated twice its normal size, eyes oozing rot, his lolling tongue black and swollen in the filthy dirt, Mewly squeaked and ran outside completely forgetting about Clancy and his rifle.

  “I’m sorry old friend. I didn’t know it was this bad. Damn you and your loyal heart. No one deserves to die like this. I don’t understand how you can just stop feeding a chained dog. I wish I had known sooner,” Shadow said to Sorrel. “He’ll never do it again. I promise.”

  Shadow saw Mewly as soon as he stepped out of Sorrel’s tomb. He was a trembly little ball of fur huddled in the middle of the dirt patch that might once have been a yard. He nudged Mewly with his nose. It only took a few seconds to get back in the shadow of the house.

  “Since you’re not dead we know Clancy is either dead himself or sleeping. Let’s go upstairs and have a look.”

  “I’m sorry Shadow. I’ve never seen something so terrible,” Mewly said.

  “Most never do. Don’t forget it. What’s the lesson here?” Shadow asked.

  “I don’t know Shadow. Is there one?” Mewly asked.

  “Everything is a lesson even if that lesson is that there is no lesson. Sometimes things just happen. Sometimes nothing could have been done by anyone to change it. Sometimes though, there is something someone can do. That’s why Soul Cats are so important. Without us those little souls would be loosed in the world. Most of them would never find their way back to be born again,” Shadow said solemnly.

  “So, the lesson of the lesson is sometimes there is no lesson? Only not always?” Mewly asked, more confused than ever.

  “Exactly so. Sometimes you simply have to accept and move on. Sometimes an action taken late is better than one not taken at all. With my friend Sorrel I accept his death and move on because there is nothing I can do to change it. But with Clancy, there I can take action. I can make it so he never does this again and is never reborn.”

  “By doing the forbidden thing you’re going to teach me that I can’t ever tell anyone I know how to do? The one that’s so bad there isn’t even a rule against it?” Mewly asked.

  “Exactly so.”

  “Did you see her foot kick at the end there Boss? Wasn’t that great? I only wish that Shadow could have seen that. Probably would have killed him,” Rusher said. He stopped pacing in excitement. Now that she was finally dead there wasn’t anything to do but wait. He sat, curled his tail around his feet and purred the purr of perfect happiness.

  “Of course I did you fool. I’m sitting three feet from you. How could I miss it? Did anyone in your litter have a brain? And it’s brilliant to sit there, in the open, where Shadow will see you when he comes. Your sacrifice may well save my life. Thank you for your consideration,” Marmalade said.

  Rusher was easily the biggest of all the cats. He was also easily one of the least intelligent. Marmalade knew he would need a strong right-hand cat that would take orders without thinking. Rusher was born to be that cat. It was a shame he wasn’t smarter, but sacrifices had to be made when one pursued success.

  Marmalade’s idea to poison Shadow’s spring and cut Tinkerbell’s rope was his most brilliant yet. It couldn’t fail. Overcome with grief and not paying attention to his surroundings because of Mystique’s death, Shadow would be easy pickings for Tinkerbell. Marmalade would have laughed. Instead he purred as best he could. He hadn’t ever really gotten the hang of it.

  “Can you hear that Mewly? That’s him snoring upstairs. We’re in luck,” Shadow said.

  “What if he’s only pretending?” Mewly asked.

  “An excellent question. It never crossed my mind. Well done Mewly. I should have thought of that. Good lesson there about being too emotionally involved. It makes you sloppy,” Shadow said. He had new admiration for the little odd-eyed cat.

  “So, it’s just like we do with the babies, but different. Right Shadow?”

  “Absolutely. The chest sitting and getting our mouths close, no change at all. But instead of catching an escaping soul and helping it move along, I’m going to rip his out. Not all of it. I’m going to leave just enough that he can see and hear, but not enough to move or talk. Hopefully he’ll have years of what he dished out served to him while he wastes away.”

  “Because he did so many bad things?” Mewly asked.

  “Yes. And because he would do so many more.

  “Get up on the bed next to me when I sit on his chest. You need to see this thing done to do it right. This thing which you will never do. Correct?” Shadow asked. His tone of voice changed while he talked, confusing Mewly even more. He wasn’t positive Shadow was serious.

  “Yes. No. I mean no. I will never do this thing,” Mewly said. It was the first lie he ever told to Shadow. He didn’t know how it would save a life, but he knew he’d understand when it was time.

  Shadow squinted at his young protégé a long moment. Shaking his head, he motioned Mewly to stay. He leapt onto the bed and froze. No one moved for more than a minute.

  Clancy was lying on his back, one arm across his forehead the other tangled in a dirty sheet. He slept in his clothes.

  When he was sure Clancy was actually asleep Shadow began to creep slowly up from the foot of the bed. He gently cat-footed, paw by slow, gentle paw, onto the sleeping man’s chest, expecting to see Clancy’s eyes pop open with every step.

  When he was in place, he motioned Mewly up beside him. The kitten took it upon himself to sit above Clancy’s head, directly across from his teacher.

  Saying nothing more, Shadow began.

  He watched Clancy breathe. If he didn’t get the timing perfect, it was he that might suffer the loss of his soul. That was the reason this was forbidden. More often than not the cat attempting it died, never to be reborn.

  Clancy snorted, sucking his tongue into the back of his throat. This is what Shadow was waiting for. While he choked, emptying his lungs in the process, but before h
e could begin to inhale, Shadow put his nose practically in Clancy’s mouth and inhaled.

  Normally a cat can fill its lungs in less than one quick second. There is only so much space inside a normal cat. Unlike balloons and frogs, they do not expand.

  Soul Cats can expand to many times their normal size while liberating souls, then compress those souls into manageable bundles for the Gray Lady.

  Shadow inhaled deeply. And kept on inhaling second after second. His sleek black body expanded, growing larger and rounder.

  Clancy grew distressed. His sleeping body knew something was not as it should be. His eyelids fluttered, but he did not wake up.

  Shadow closed his eyes and kept drawing Clancy’s soul out of his body. Clancy thrashed his legs. He tried to move the arm tangled in his sheet. He swept the arm above his head down, hitting Shadow and almost knocking him off. Shadow rammed his head into Clancy’s mouth. He dug his claws into the man’s chest for better traction.

  Clancy raised his arm again, trying to fend off the demon trying to kill him. He couldn’t open his eyes. He feared he was going to die.

  Shadow’s tail thrashed like a snake with its head cut off and he began to growl. Clancy’s arm hit him again, almost knocking him off, but Mewly, scared, brave little Mewly, pounced on it as if it were a weasel after kittens.

  He sank his small sharp teeth into Clancy’s hand and all of his claws into the wildly waving arm.

  Clancy tried to scream, but he had nothing in his lungs.

  Shadow continued withdrawing the tainted soul.

  Clancy stopped thrashing. His eyes opened but saw nothing. He was dead.

  Shadow sat up straight, squared his shoulders, and prepared to finish this forbidden act. Gently he put his mouth up to Clancy’s cold lips and exhaled slow and easy, giving back in the tiniest of puffs, a remnant of the soul he had just stolen.