Rakitaki: A Jonas Quartermain Adventure

by Lee Alexander

  “Don’t you wish, handsome. Guess again.”

  “Molly Ringwald.”

  “Ooh, don’t I wish,” she said. Then she turned him around and kissed him.

  “Hey babe,” he said.

  “No more of that, you know who I am,” she said with mock jealousy.

  “It’s pretty obvious, since you’re the only person who struggles to reach my eyes.”

  “I’m not that short,” she pouted with her hands akimbo. He laughed in response, then swept her up in his arms and walked toward the house.

  “How about a drink?” He asked as they ascended the stairs.

  “I would love that.”

  Jonas looked at Madsen who shrugged, then followed them in. The music went up another notch as they entered the house proper. It reminded him of the party in Sharm El-Sheikh. He had a momentary vision of throwing the belly dancer through the window in the club. He snapped back a moment later, filled with adrenaline. It had been less than a second, and the group hadn’t managed more than a step or two.

  They entered the kitchen and grabbed a round of AMFs from the two co-eds behind the bar. They retired to the backyard and sat around the firepit. The fire was already going, providing warmth inside a tent. It was a stark difference to the cold air just beyond in the snow-layered backyard. Aside from the music, it seemed the whole world was silent. It reminded him of the nearly-silent nights at the pyramid, working quietly through the pile of artifacts.

  Jonas checked out the yard and thought he saw Tricky in one corner for a split second. However, as a pocket of sap inside the logs exploded, the shadows shifted and the strange drug-dealer-come-dreamwalker was gone. Jonas rubbed his eyes and looked at the corner again.

  “Hey, Jonas, you okay buddy?” Asked Elliott.

  He turned back to the firepit and the lively conversation. “What? Oh, yeah, just thought I saw something.”

  “What did you see?” Elliott followed his gaze, looking into the darkness.

  “Nothing, like I said. What was the question?”

  “Madsen said we should get a whole group and play a drinking game.”

  “I thought we were going to play pool, but a drinking game sounds like a good time to me,” Jonas replied. Angie made agreeing noises, though failed to form an actual word. She snuggled up tighter to Elliott on the wooden bench. The dancing fire cast long shadows across their faces. Their faces shifted with each flicker, going through a dozen different emotions as the shadows changed.

  Madsen turned toward the house, and in a basso thunder roared out. “Game time bitches! Get out here and drink!”

  In two short minutes, another twenty people had shown up. They were crowded on the seats, though Jonas was pleased. Two young, attractive women had wound up on either side of him, squeezed into the small seat. Madsen had women on either side of him as well.

  After people were situated, the massive football player sat forward and announced the rules.

  “The game is ‘Never have I ever’,” he said. “The rules are simple. You have five lives. One for each finger in your off hand. Someone says something they’ve never done, and anybody that has loses a life, or a finger, and takes a drink. Last one standing is a loser!” He trailed off into uproarious laughter, joined by most of the group.

  He lifted his own empty bottle, and someone scurried off to grab a new one for him. He placed the empty on the ground near the fire and spun it. The bottle rolled to a stop, pointing at a small, mousey blonde near Jonas. Madsen pointed a finger at her and said “You’re up first. After that, to your left.”

  “Oh, okay,” she said. She dry-swallowed hard, then took a gulp of her drink. Then she looked at the group and steeled her resolve. “I’ve never been—”

  “Never have I ever,” interrupted Madsen.

  “Right. Uh, never have I ever been blackout drunk.”

  A round of boos and jeers greeted her as nearly every other person in the ring put a finger down and took a drink. Jonas dutifully put a finger down and took a drink. He had partied hard a few times that he could recall.

  The student next to the blonde started his turn, though Jonas tuned him out. It was something stupid. Nobody put their finger down, and the turn passed. He kept half an ear open, but ended up stuck in his own thoughts. Then he was jerked out of his reverie by a familiar voice.

  “Never have I ever been in a threesome,” Elliott said, then put his own finger down.

  “Uh, uh! Against the rules. You drink and lose your turn. Nobody else needs to answer that one. Has to be something you’ve never done.” Madsen turned an eye on Elliott. “Nice going, but this isn’t for bragging.”

  Laughter followed in the drunken way of groups. Elliott waved his hand, laughing.

  “Alright, alright, I got one. Never have I ever killed someone.”

  Jonas was shocked still. He locked on Elliott’s face, ruddy with alcohol.

  “Not allowed! You’ve gotta go for more reasonable stuff. Alright, you’re done, Elliott. You’re up, Angie.”

  “Never have I ever… done that new drug, what’s it called? Oh yeah, the Talky.”

  Jonas’ attention was instantly laser-focused on her. Then he watched as several people laughed, held their drinks up for cheers, and then drank. He watched those who drank, making sure to note their faces for later. The game went into raunchy questions, then into the esoteric again. When it came around to him, he struggled to come up with an answer.

  “Uh, never have I ever… gone skydiving?”

  “Yo, why you asking a question? Have you, or haven’t you?” Asked Madsen.

  “I, uh, haven’t.”

  “Well damn.” Madsen put his last finger down. “Guess that makes me the winner,” he said as he trailed off into drunken laughter.

  30

  “Is being damned a winning situation?”

  Jonas nearly hurt his neck whipping his head around to look at the source of the voice. Tricky stood just behind him, drink in one hand and doob in the other. He raised his joint in a toast to Jonas, then turned and walked away. Jonas was too closed in to chase after the strange man.

  “Tricky!”

  Madsen looked over at Jonas.

  “What? No, it’s straightforward. Never have I ever stolen something.”

  “Oh, uh, yeah, right.” Jonas said as he finished off his drink. “I’m empty, need a new one.”

  He stood, disturbing the girls seated on either side of him. He made his way out of the ring and back toward the house. He practically flew through the kitchen slider. The strange man was nowhere to be seen. The party was still in full swing, people dancing in any available space. The bartenders looked drunk as well, squinting as they poured off strong concoctions.

  Jonas began elbowing his way through the crowd, trying to find any hint of the dealer. As he neared the downstairs bathroom, a short woman caught him by the shoulder.

  “Hey handsome. Want to try something new?”

  “What? No, I’m looking for a uh… a friend.” He kept his head on a swivel, trying to scan for the hippy Olympian.

  “Come on, it’s fun. It’ll make you feel like a million bucks.”

  ‘I’ve heard that before´, he thought to himself.

  He turned back to her. “Let me guess, it’s that new Talky stuff, right?”

  “Yeah, baby. You up for it?”

  His hands throbbed with phantom pain for a moment before he nodded thoughtfully. “Yeah, but uh, I like the pure stuff. You know where it comes from?”

  She laughed drunkenly. “Where it comes from? My dealer.”

  “Oh cool, what’s his name?”

  “Her name is none of your business. I’m just trying to share here,” she said as she rubbed her nose with the palm of a hand. “Never mind. You sound like a narc.”

  He watched as she wandered back into the crowd.

  ‘It’s here too. I really need to find out what’s going on.’

  Jonas shook her hand loose, only to run into Madsen.
<
br />   “Hey buddy. Where you going? I see you didn’t grab a drink yet.”

  “Oh, uh, thought I saw someone. No big deal.”

  Madsen gently grabbed Jonas’ shoulders, spinning him in place.

  “Great, go grab your drink. Those girls are waiting for you, killer. I’ll be right behind you.” With that, Madsen pushed Jonas back through the crowd and into the kitchen. A glance back confirmed that Madsen was still watching, so he grabbed a drink from the bartender. The smell of weed and cigarettes dominated the air so close to the backyard. Stuck for what to do, he walked near the door, hoping to catch sight of Tricky.

  A moment later, Madsen walked into the kitchen. He stood nearly head and shoulders above the crowd, a giant among mortals. He had a new level of swagger beyond his normal cocky attitude. When he moved a hand up to wipe his nose, Jonas saw the faint glow of red in his veins. Jonas wondered why Madsen had the glow like he’d had, when Hatem had just turned into an animal.

  “Shit,” he breathed. Madsen turned and gave him a feral grin. It deeply unsettled him, made something in his hind brain squirm. Someone bumped into Jonas, sending him a half step to the side. He overbalanced to his right and amplified the movement, crashing into the counter. Dishes crashed into the sink, momentarily overwhelming the music. He scrabbled on the counter as he fell.

  “Don’t worry guys, I saved the drink,” Jonas called out. The drunks all around cheered his save. He stood and waved off the drunk that tried to apologize to him. Madsen was staring, less friendly than before. Jonas raised his glass in a toast to Madsen, who returned it. Then he turned and walked out into the yard. The cool winter air washed over him, making him thankful for his thick jacket. His breath turned to fog.

  Somewhere in his mind, a third eye opened. He felt an overwhelming evil looming behind him. Jonas spun to his right in a tight juke. Madsen’s massive hand clipped his shoulders as the man tried to tackle him to the ground. Jonas took a big swig from the cup and threw the rest in Madsen’s face as the man rolled to a stop.

  “Rrrr,” he growled. “Wreck! Gonna wreck… rock… rock you,” he muttered. Glass littered the ground. Madsen had taken out part of the sliding glass door in his dive. He stood and shucked his jacket to pull a huge shard of glass from his shoulder, then tossed it to the ground. Jonas watched as the massive gash along the football player’s shoulder closed.

  “How?”

  “RAKITAKI!” Madsen screamed as he launched himself at Jonas again. Other screams could be heard both inside and outside the house. Madsen had his hands out, aiming for Jonas’ neck. Time seemed to slow. Jonas could only hear his heart thundering in his ears. He ducked out of the way, pushing on the giant’s chest as he flew past, increasing his airborne speed. Madsen slammed into the side of the house with an impact so fierce it cracked the siding.

  Jonas stood, staring at his friend. The music had been cut, leaving the party completely silent. Madsen lay on the ground, stunned. He shook himself off, stood, loosed a roar, and jumped at Jonas again. Jonas cocked his arm and let loose a wild right hook. It connected with Madsen’s face, and searing pain told Jonas he had broken something. Madsen shot back again, once more impacting the side of the house. The cracks spread even further.

  He stooped and grabbed the shard of glass Madsen had dropped. It was at least eight inches long, and shaped like the blade of a kitchen knife. He gripped it tightly, drawing blood from his fingers. He tried to ignore the agony of his right hand. He had no idea how he would survive the monster attempting to kill him. Madsen stood again, ripping his shirt clean off. When he opened his mouth to hiss, his canines were very prominent. The veins all along his hands and up into his forearms glowed brightly. It was made more evident against the man’s dark skin.

  Madsen stepped in and punched at Jonas’ head. He ducked and returned with a left jab to the ribcage. The glass slid into the man’s chest with little resistance. The hit barely fazed the larger man, who gripped both hands and hit Jonas in the side with a hammer blow. Jonas was tossed like a ragdoll ten feet toward the fire. The wind was knocked from him and his breath hitched. It felt like he’d been hit by a truck, and he was sure something else had broken. The giant roared again and leapt forward. He covered the ten feet and reached down to lift the prone man.

  Jonas coughed as the massive hands lifted him. He focused his eyes on the rage-filled face of his former friend. There was no humanity left. Jonas punched the sliver of glass deeper into Madsen’s chest, causing him to stagger and drop Jonas.

  He caught his breath as he dropped to the ground, wincing quickly as his right hand brushed the dirt. The sky began to change from pre-dawn gray to the light of morning, and Jonas felt his heart leap with hope. He had a guess what would happen when the sunlight hit Madsen. He would just have to survive another minute or two.

  Madsen ripped the glass from his chest and threw it to the side where it shattered on the fence. His breathing had a wet popping quality for a moment as dark blood oozed from the hole in his chest. Then the wound closed over two seconds, and Madsen stood straight. He laughed an inhuman laugh that froze the spectators in fear.

  Jonas, on the other hand, had dealt with that fear before. He had been burned by the sunlight, had watched a man die. He did not want to die at the hands of the monster in front of him. He bunched up, then launched himself into an uppercut with all the power he could muster. His left hand connected with Madsen’s jaw and snapped the monster’s head back. His feet left the ground and he flew back five feet.

  Jonas landed and stumbled. He dropped his left hand and right knee on the ground. Nobody was trying to help him against the berserk man. He was outclassed in every regard against the athlete. Madsen howled in fury, then pounded the ground and shot himself back to his feet. The ground cratered where he’d hit it. Jonas was stronger than the average man, but Madsen was a whole new level of power. He felt ragged already. The fight had been going for two minutes and it felt like twenty.

  A second shriek tore the silent air. The blonde woman that had offered him drugs before sailed over Madsen and slammed into Jonas. He flung her away with all his strength, accidentally putting himself into a roll. When he came to a stop against the fire pit, Madsen and the blonde woman were standing over him. Their faces were a rictus of feral smiles. A strange gleam behind their eyes told Jonas they were no longer the people they had started the night as. Fires seemed to rage in the veins on their hands and arms.

  Jonas knew he was done for. They reached down, hands like claws. Fingers dug into his flesh. He cried out in agony. He punched out wildly, but the two of them overpowered him. They grappled and rolled in the grass and snow until they were in the open again. Madsen pinned his shoulders down, leaving him helpless. Then the sun crested the trees. The screams of the changed people were ear-rending. Flames engulfed them both and wrapped him in brilliant agony. He felt his skin draw tight, then crack and char. His hair crisped away. He felt his eyes boil before popping in the extreme heat. He wanted to die, for the pain to end.

  31

  “What the hell are you doing, Johnny?”

  Jonas opened his eyes, seeing Elliott standing over him. He raised his head and groaned.

  “Euuugghhhh, what did we drink last night?” He rolled to his side, wondering if he was going to puke.

  “I don’t know, but it wasn’t enough to see you bare-assed naked in the back yard.”

  “What?!”

  Jonas sat up, his head throbbing. He looked down at himself, seeing that he was in fact completely naked. He shivered in the cold. On either side of him were familiar Joshua trees stretching to the sky. They stood just about six feet high with little branches pointing upward. He did not remember the trees being there the night before.

  “Let’s go. You need clothes before you die of exposure.”

  Elliott helped Jonas stand up, then put a steadying hand on his back and ushered his friend inside the house. Jonas ached all over. His ribs felt like powdered glass, and his hand hurt to move
. He looked down and saw a massive black and purple bruise covering his entire ride side from his hips to his shoulder. His hand was swollen. He shook his head, trying to remember how he’d suffered such terrible injuries. Then he saw the cuts on his left hand. They looked a week old.

  The house was quiet, the music off while the lights still flashed and spun. As they crossed the threshold into the kitchen, two thoughts struck Jonas. He looked at the door as they entered, knowing it should have been broken. Then he looked back at the two strange trees growing where they didn’t belong.

  “Aren’t those Joshua trees?”

  “Huh?” Elliott asked absentmindedly.

  “The trees. I think they’re Joshua trees. I don’t think those grow this far north. Joshua trees grow in deserts.”

  “And now I have semantic satiation,” Elliott said as they continued to gingerly walk around the sleeping partiers.

  “Semanta-what?”

  “Semantic satiation. It means a word has temporarily lost meaning to me because I heard it so much. Tree. Tree. Mleh. Tree. Yup, it’s gibberish.” Elliott made funny faces as he continued saying the word.

  Jonas shook his head. “Did we stay up all night drinking again? What time is it?”

  “I dunno. Dawn was like half an hour ago. I’m getting us back to the dorm as soon as possible. You still need clothes.” Elliott waved at Jonas’ nudity, carefully not looking at him.

  “Maybe I can just borrow some from Madsen.”

  “Who?” He asked. He sounded distant, like he wasn’t really paying attention.

  “Madsen. The guy who hosted the party.”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I hosted this party with a friend named Kaala. I mean, her last name is Madsen, but she’s definitely not going to have clothes for you.”

  Jonas nodded his head even though Elliott didn’t see him. “I know Kaala. Isn’t she Madsen’s twin?”

  “She doesn’t have any siblings. You’re still drunk. What the hell happened to your clothes anyway?”