It Ends Tonight (Bayou Devils MC Book 4)
Page 22
* * * *
A car horn blares behind me and I jump, turning away from the EQA Events sign to glance over my shoulder as I blow out a breath. My eyes burn from another night of barely any sleep since I’ve spent the last twelve hours camped out here, waiting for a glimpse of her. I’m fucking frustrated, on edge, and more than ready to get some goddamn answers from the woman I love with everything I’ve got. Quinn’s assistant, Willa, arrived ten minutes ago and now I’m just waiting to see her. I’ve spent the last two days wondering why she won’t talk to me and if she’s even half as miserable as I am. I finally understand what Storm, Chance, and Kodiak went through with their own women now that the current pain in my ass and love of my goddamn life is avoiding me like the plague. This is probably some karmic retribution for giving them so much shit at the time.
A flash of blonde hair catches my attention and I watch as she climb out of her new car and rounds the hood. She’s just as gorgeous as always but the dark circles under her eyes give her away and as much as I hate to see her in pain, it makes me feel a little bit better that this isn’t easy for her. She glances out at the street and I duck down in my truck, whispering a curse, but she doesn’t see me or if she does, she doesn’t acknowledge my presence. Sadness is etched into every curve of her stunning face and my stomach rolls.
What the fuck happened to put that look in her eyes?
I watch her until she disappears into the office and run my hand through my hair as I suck in a breath. I’ll give her a few minutes and then, it’s showtime. I’m not leaving without some damn answers and if I have to beg her for another chance or forgiveness, I’ll do it. Not that I have any clue what I might be apologizing for. Pulling the engagement ring out of my pocket, I stare at it and wonder if I’m ever going to be able to slip it on her finger. When I saw it in the store, I knew it was fucking perfect for her and I imagined a whole life for us - all three of us since Brooklyn has stolen my heart just as much as her mama has. The thought of spending my life without the two of them…
No.
Fuck that mess.
I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life and if I’m going down, I’ll go down fighting.
Blowing out a breath, I turn off the car I borrowed from Blaze and open the door before stepping outside and squaring my shoulders. As I cross the street, all the questions that have been running through my head since I left her house yesterday return and I ball my fists at my sides. There is no scenario where I don’t get the answers I need today. It’s not an option. And then once I know what we’re dealing with, I can start to fix it.
The bell on the door jingles as I pull it open and step inside. Willa continues staring at something on her desk as she smiles.
“Hi. What can I help you with?” She glances up and her eyes widen. “What are you doing here, Lucas?”
“I need to see her,” I answer. She shakes her head.
“I can’t let you do that.”
I take a step forward and she stands. “I need to see her, Willa.”
She shakes her head again, her gaze hardening. “And I said no. You need to leave.”
“That’s not going to happen.”
“Lucas, don’t make me call security. She’ll talk to you when she’s ready.” She reaches for the phone and the last of my patience slips away. I don’t give a damn who she calls and I’m not leaving this damn building until I see Quinn. She grabs the receiver and I let out a grunt of frustration as I march toward Quinn’s office door. She steps in front of me.
“Lucas!” she yells as I dodge her and approach Quinn’s office door. “I’m calling security.”
I turn and shoot a glare over my shoulder. “So call them.”
“Willa,” Quinn’s voice crackles through the phone’s speaker. “Let him in.”
Fucking finally.
I open the door to the office and step inside before stopping dead in my tracks. Quinn is seated behind the desk and just like yesterday, she’s crying. It fucking rips through me like claws and I can’t fight the pulling sensation deep down in my gut, telling me to go to her and wrap my arms around her. Crossing the room in three quick strides, I stop next to her chair and do just that.
“God, I missed you, baby,” I whisper into her hair and a sob bubbles out of her but I ignore it. Whatever is going on is serious and I need just a few more seconds to hold her before I find out what it is.
“Lucas,” she gasps, clinging to my shirt so I hold her tighter, hoping to take just a little bit of her pain away as worry eats away at me. Pulling back, I meet her eyes and try to force a smile to my face.
“You wanna tell me what’s going on here, baby? Why I had to hunt you down at work just to get you to talk to me?”
Another sob spills out of her mouth and she nods as she presses the back of her fingers to her lips. “You should sit.”
“Think I’ll stand,” I growl. Her eyes beg me for compliance and I pull her back to me, pressing my lips against her forehead before releasing her and rounding the desk. We both sink into our chairs and she sucks in a breath.
“I don’t know where to start.”
I nod, running the tip of my finger along my bottom lip as I study her. “Why don’t you start with what happened at the baby shower?”
“We…uh, we have to start before that.”
“Meaning?” I ask, arching a brow.
“Do you remember when I told you about Brooklyn’s father?”
My stomach turns as I remember the night she told me about her past and I nod. “Yeah, I remember, babe.”
“The man who raped me… he was never found and I’ve never seen him again…” She sucks in a breath as more tears fall down her cheeks. “Until we were at the baby shower.”
I blink and stare at her, my mind stalling on her words. “Are you saying one of the guys raped you? Quinn, they would fucking never…”
“No, Lucas,” she whispers, her tears falling faster. “It wasn’t one of the guys.”
“There was no one else…”
My sluggish thoughts screech to a halt and I stare at her for a second, searching for any kind of clue that she’s not implying what I think she’s implying.
“No,” I whisper and she nods, staring down at her shaking hands as she presses them to the table and another sob rips through her.
“I’m so sorry, Lucas.”
I jerk out of my seat, knocking it backward as I stumble away from her. “No.” She meets my eyes and I can see the certainty in her gaze. I run my hand through my hair as I pace back and forth across her office. “No. It’s not possible.”
“You have no idea,” she says as she stands, “how much I wish it weren’t true but as soon as I saw him, I knew. Your brother is the man who raped me.”
“No!” I scream, shaking my head. My thoughts are heavy as I try to piece it all together, make it all make sense because she has to be mistaken. There is no way that Clay is her rapist. “You’re wrong. You didn’t get a good look at him.”
“Lucas,” she says, her tone grave. “For those two minutes, I stared your brother in the face as he violated me and I will never forget him. Not even when I’m old and gray. I know this is hard for you but don’t ever insinuate that I don’t know who the monster who raped me is.”
I take another step back and shake my head. “He’s not a monster. He’s my brother.”
“To you, he isn’t but to me…”
“No. He had to have been high at the time. He probably didn’t even know…”
“And that makes it any better?” she asks, interrupting me and I shake my head.
I don’t know what to do.
I don’t know what to think.
Blowing out a breath, I continue my pacing and pull at my hair, wishing there was someone I could punch nearby just to do something with the thunderstorm of emotions rocking through me.
“No,” I breathe, shaking my head. “Of course, it doesn’t make it better but…”
She steps forwa
rd and holds her hand up. “Please just stop. Nothing you could say is going to fix what he did.”
“Baby…” I whisper, meeting her gaze and it hits me as her pain rips through me again just like before. My baby brother raped her. All this time I’ve been killing myself to save him, to find him some piece of redemption but maybe he was too far gone all along. Staring at my girl, I imagine her that night, shoved into an alley while he had his way with her and tears burn my eyes as I shake my head. “I’m so sorry.”
She releases a stuttered breath as fresh tears drip down her face. “You have nothing to apologize for.”
“Are you going to go to the police?”
“That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out for the last three days. If he was anyone else, I would have already reported him but he’s not. He’s your brother and I don’t know how to do anything that wouldn’t hurt you.”
I open my mouth to answer her before realizing that I don’t know what to say. I’m being torn in half by my love for her and my love for my brother and she’s right. If he was anyone else, I would be right there beside her, turning him into the police. Taking a step toward the door, I grab the handle and shake my head. “I… I have to go.”
She meets my eyes, sobbing again as she nods and I turn toward the door as my stomach twists into knots. I hesitate only for a second before yanking it open and practically running out of the office and to my truck. I can’t deal with this now. I need time to think and sort this all out because either way, I fucking lose.
I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do?
Do I betray the woman I love or the only blood I have left?
* * * *
A clap of thunder rattles the walls as lightning streaks across the sky and a whimper greets me in the darkness from the other side of the room. Clay has always been scared of storms but I can’t be sure that’s the reason he’s uneasy tonight. I clutch my blanket tighter and stare up at the green glow in the dark stars Mom helped me put on the ceiling last Christmas, praying for daylight. Something about the darkness always makes the fighting seem worse.
“Luke?” Clay whispers, his voice wavering with unshed tears. I force down the fear creeping up the back of my spine and turn my head to look at him.
“It’s just thunder, Clay. Go back to sleep.”
His little lip wobbles as he meets my gaze. “Why are they fighting this time?”
The sound of breaking glass pierces the silence and echoes down the hallway, punctuating his question and I shake my head.
“I don’t know.”
Staring at the door, I strain my ears, trying to hear anything from the front of the house but it’s quiet. Too quiet. It’s almost as if the crickets and frogs that usually chirp outside our bedroom window can sense the approaching storm. Or maybe they can sense the same thing that’s been making my tummy feel funny all night long.
“Goddamn it, Amanda!” Dad’s voice booms, full of anger, and I shrink into myself, my heart pounding as I grip the blanket tighter. I wish I could say this was new but Mom and Dad have been fighting a lot lately and it scares me but I have to be tough for Clay. Dad wasn’t always like this – so grumpy and short-tempered – but when he lost his job a year ago, everything started to change. I think Mom hoped that when he found work again, things would get better but they’ve only gotten worse. He’s unpredictable and when he loses his temper, I’m terrified of him.
“Ray, please don’t do this!” Mom’s wail reverberates through the house and Clay lets out another whimper. With my heart pounding in my ears, I turn to him and bring my finger to my lips. He nods, tears welling up in his eyes. As scary as this is for me, I know it’s got to be worse for him. He’s only five and he looks at me as his protector so that’s what I have to be.
“No!”
A loud bang rips through the house, making me jump out of my skin as Clay cries out. Without thinking, I throw the covers off of me and race to his bedside before placing my hand over his mouth. He stares up at me, his eyes full of terror, and I press my finger to my lips, desperate to shut him up before Dad hears. My heart hammers in my chest and tears well up in my eyes but I hand him a pillow to cry into before stepping away from his bed and moving toward the door, careful to avoid the floorboards that creak. I creep over to the door, careful not to make any noise as I crouch down behind it and pry it open before peeking down the hallway.
Mom is laying in a heap at the other end of the hallway and Dad is on his knees next to her, covered in blood, and holding a gun in his hand. Dark red blood pools under her and pain rips through my chest.
No.
No.
No.
Mom!
“Fuck,” Dad chokes out, his voice like nothing I’ve ever heard before and he grabs the gun again, staring down at it as his finger wraps around the trigger. I have no idea what he’s going to do next but I know Clay and I can’t be around to find out. When I try to move, my gaze drops back down to Mom and tears slip down my cheeks.
Mom…
A scream echoes through my head as more tears fall and I mash my lips together. Every part of my body wants to run to her, shake her, force her to wake up but the gun in Dad’s hand keeps me rooted to this spot. Taking a step back, I carefully shut the door and turn to Clay as silent tears fall down my face.
“Get dressed now and be quiet.”
He shakes his head. “What’s going on, Luke? Where’s Mom? I want Mom.”
I choke back a sob and shake my head, crossing the room to his bed. I grab his arms and hold them firmly. “This is important, Clay. You have to be quiet and we have to go, now. Get dressed.”
“What about Mom?” he asks again and I shake my head.
“We’ll come back for Mom tomorrow but for now, she’s safe.” I hate lying to him but I have to get him out of here. When he nods, I release him and go to the closet, grabbing my backpack before I start shoving clothes in it. When it’s full and I’m dressed, I zip it up and turn back to Clay as I throw it on my back.
He shifts on his feet, looking between me and the door and I shake my head, pointing to the window.
“This way.”
He glances at the door. “Are you sure, Luke?”
“Hey, I’m your big brother. Would I ever lie to you?”
He shakes his head. “No. Never.”
“Smith?” someone asks, jerking me awake, and I blink into the harsh overhead lights of the clubhouse as I open my eyes. Blaze arches a brow and glances down at the half empty bottle of whiskey on the table in front of me and I sigh as I lean forward, grab it, and raise the bottle to my lips. “What’s going on, brother?”
I shake my head, tears welling up in my eyes as I remember leaving Quinn in her office hours ago. “I…Fuck. It’s all fucked, Blaze.”
“What’s going on, Smith?” he asks, his voice taking on a serious tone as he sits down next to me and I take another swig of liquor.
“My brother….” It’s all I can choke out without a deluge of unbearable emotions drowning me.
“Did something happen? Is he okay?”
I shake my head. “Quinn was raped a couple years ago. That’s how she got pregnant with Brooklyn.”
“Okay…”
“They never caught her rapist.”
His brows furrow as he studies me. “Where the hell is this going, Luke?”
“Clay is the man who raped her. She saw him at the baby shower and recognized him instantly.”
“Oh, fuck,” he whispers, running a hand through his hair. “Jesus Christ.”
I nod, taking another swig of whiskey. This damn thing was full when I started drinking but it’s still not enough to dull the pain.
“What are you going to do?”
I let out a humorless laugh before pouring more alcohol down my throat. “I’ll let you know when I figure it out.”
Chapter Nineteen
Quinn
I stumble out of the bar and press my hand along the rough brick of the building as I
stop and lean against it, sucking in a breath before I drop my head back and stare up at the few stars that I can see through the city lights. Music pumps from the bar as the door opens again and I fight back a smile. Despite my reluctance to come out tonight and the rough start to our evening, I’m glad my girls talked me into going out with them. It’s exactly what I needed after moping over my breakup with Danny for the past couple months - not that I regret it. Ending things was the right choice but I had our future mapped out in my mind and losing that has left me feeling a little lost. Tonight feels like the start of something really good though and for the first time in a while, I’m excited for what’s to come. Grams signed EQA Events over to me last week and officially retired. I’m scared to take the business she built from the ground up into my hands but I also haven’t felt this alive in a long time - before things ended with Danny - and it tells me I’m finally on the right track. Hell, I would even be open to dating again if the opportunity presented itself so I think that means I’m doing all right.
A scraping sound draws my attention back to the door. There’s a man by the door but he’s completely oblivious to me, staring at the sidewalk and smoking a cigarette so I turn back to the sky as a warm breeze brushes over my skin. I should get back inside before the girls come out looking for me. My head is still spinning though and I think I’m about ready to call it a night. I push off the wall and turn toward the door but before I can take a step, two large arms wrap around me and I scream.
“Shut up,” his voice hisses in my ear as a hand clamps down on my mouth and he starts pulling me away from the door. I search for the man that was smoking a cigarette, hoping he can help me, but the sidewalk is empty. I scream against the hand on my lips and kick my legs, trying desperately to escape. He’s too strong. My heart thunders against my rip cage as he pulls me into the alley on the side of the bar and tears sting my eyes.
“No!” I scream as soon as he uncovers my mouth. He lets out a grunt as I continue jerking against his hold. Pain explodes in my chest and my vision blurs as we fall to the ground. He pins me to the concrete with one hand around each of my wrists and my chest feels tight. “Help!”