Breaking Free (The Den Boys Book 3)
Page 8
I’d seen him naked that first night, but seeing him now, and having a moment to really look at him reminded me just how gorgeous he was.
Between his broad shoulders and slender waist he had that V body shape that I loved, and his powerful legs and muscled arms only added to his beauty. Then there was that smattering of dark chest hair that tapered down into the most enticing treasure trail I’d ever seen.
I wanted to reach out for him, to wrap my hand around his cock and feel him pulse before I took all of him in my mouth, but I remembered how he hadn’t wanted me to touch him last time.
“Fuck, you’re sexy. So fucking perfect,” he breathed as he looked me up and down.
“You too, so perfect.” I nodded, my eyes moving from his sculpted chest to his incredible eyes.
I hooked my thumbs over the waistband of my briefs and slowly tugged them down. Zander swallowed when my dick sprang free, and I slowed my pace even more. He watched as I pushed them down my thighs and let them puddle at my feet for a moment before kicking them aside.
“Come here.”
I stepped into his arms and was immediately enveloped by his strong body. His lips were on mine, his tongue sweeping into my mouth as he kissed me senseless.
Deep kissing, the kind that takes over your entire being and lets you live in a moment where nothing matters except the person you’re with, was something I loved. To me, it could be even more satisfying than sex. It was also something I hadn’t experienced in a long time.
Kissing was intimate, and most of my partners had either done the bare minimum or skipped it altogether. In order to fully experience a deep kiss and let myself get lost in it, I had to trust the person I was with. Those men were few and far between, and the only guy I’d ever truly been able to let go with had been my high school boyfriend.
Now that Zander was holding me tight as his lips slanted over mine time and time again, I felt completely safe. I hadn’t felt that in a long time.
I had no idea how long we stood there, kissing and holding each other, but Zander slowly started to bring other parts of his body into the kiss, easing me out of my near trance.
His hand slid over my ass, squeezing my cheek before giving it a light slap.
The move surprised me, but it didn’t hurt. The slight sting sent a shot of pleasure up my spine, and I moaned against his lips.
“Your ass is so fucking perfect. I love the way it feels. How it bounces when I fuck you.” Zander said against my lips, his voice low and husky.
“Fuck— oh!”
His hand connected with my other cheek, the slap slightly harder this time, before he gently rubbed his palm over my stinging skin.
“Fuck.” I shook my head, trying to move my hair back from where it had fallen over my cheek, as he stood up straight.
With our height difference, not to mention different body types, I felt so small and vulnerable against him, and the thought that he could toss me down and do whatever he wanted to me sent a thrill through my body.
Before I could even register what was happening, Zander had scooped me up into his arms. He held me against his body as he crawled up my bed and then lowered us both to the mattress.
“Fuck, Zander.” I arched my back as his hands ran down my sides and his lips bit and sucked at the skin on my neck.
“Condoms?” he asked, his lips against my ear as his hands squeezed my waist hard enough to sting.
“Bedside table,” I managed to gasp as he bit down where my shoulder met my neck, and a part of me hoped he’d done it hard enough to leave a mark.
I took a moment to collect myself as Zander moved off me to get the supplies out of my table. Everything about this man was intoxicating, and I needed to get my focus back if I wanted to be an active participant tonight and not starfish my way through it in a daze.
A moment later Zander was back over me, his body once again blanketing mine as he kissed me so deeply it was as though he was trying to brand my soul.
When he finally pulled back and sat up, I glanced at his hand. He’d only brought one condom.
I knew he was going to be the one to wear it, and I didn’t mind. I liked bottoming. I knew what positions worked for me, and Zander had been nothing but attentive last time, but there was that little part of me that longed to even be asked if I wanted to top.
I was smaller than most men, and I had a habit of finding myself with big, masculine guys. They were tops through and through, and it was expected of me to be the bottom because that’s what the little guy was supposed to do.
The only guy I’d ever topped was my high school boyfriend, and that had only been once. After a few months of sleeping together, I’d screwed up the courage to ask if we could switch roles, and he’d agreed. I’d fumbled my way through it and had been so focused on not fucking up I hadn’t had a chance to really experience the moment.
Afterward, he’d confessed that he hadn’t enjoyed it and didn’t want to bottom anymore so that had been the beginning and end of my time as a top.
Watching Zander as he rolled the condom over his thick cock was enough to make me grab my dick and give it a few hard tugs. As much as I wanted to be the one to fuck him, I was desperate to feel him inside me again.
When he was suited up and had slathered a decent amount of lube on the condom, he paused.
There was something in his eyes that wasn’t right. It was almost as though he was searching for a way to tell me something. A memory from our last time together popped into my head, and I remembered how he’d paused then too.
It wasn’t until he bit his lip and shifted his legs wider apart that it dawned on me. He was trying to find a way to tell me to flip over without hurting my feelings.
I let go of my dick and moved my legs so they were between his as he knelt on my bed. Once I had my legs settled, I rolled onto my stomach and arched my back so my ass popped a bit more.
Zander sighed and moved up so he was straddling my thighs as his hands gently kneaded my ass. I felt a slick finger trace over my hole and tried to relax.
I didn’t like being fingered.
The few times I’d let someone do it for me in the past it had been rough, painful and a little degrading. It was true it made sex hurt less, but I’d take the burn from a dick over the pain from a finger any day.
As the tip of Zander’s finger traced over me, I closed my eyes and steadied my breathing. It helped me relax, and he was able to slip his finger inside me down to the first knuckle.
There was that burn and that stretching sensation, and when he pushed the rest of the way in, I bit back a gasp. He moved his finger around, gently spreading the lube inside me, then paused.
“Do you want more?” he asked, his voice low and a little gravelly.
“No, that’s fine. Fuck me.”
Zander pulled his finger out of me with a groan and leaned over me, one hand on the mattress beside me so he could hold his body over mine as the blunt head of his cock pressed against my entrance.
Breathing out, I braced myself for when he began to push in, and then pushed back as soon as he’d breached my outer muscles.
I appreciated how he didn’t just shove his dick in and go to town. I’d basically given him carte blanche to do just that, but instead, he paused and gave me a chance to adjust.
He placed his other hand on the bed beside me and then started rocking his hips, going a little deeper each time until he was fully seated in me.
Fuck he was big, and it wasn’t just his length. He had girth, and that was the part I had to get used to.
“Okay?” he asked in a strained voice.
The pain and burning had faded and had been replaced with a desperate need to feel him fill me over and over again. I didn’t want soft and gentle, not right now. I needed him to fuck me, hard.
“Yes, fuck me. Please.”
With a grunt Zander sat back on his haunches, his big hands spreading my cheeks as he began thrusting into me. The angle was perfect. It forced the head of
his cock to slide over my prostate, and because my dick was trapped beneath my body, I couldn’t stroke it to try and ease the pleasure that was spinning out from deep inside my body.
“Fuck me harder,” I begged shamelessly. I could tell he was holding back, and the last thing I needed was for him to treat me like I was made of glass or would break if he got a bit rough.
“Shit, Kai...” Zander’s voice was deep and broken as he slammed his cock inside me hard enough to shift me up the mattress. I didn’t want him to lose the angle, so I lifted my hands and braced them on the headboard, effectively anchoring my body in place so he could fuck me as hard as he wanted.
Even though I was putting all of my strength behind holding myself back, I was still being rocked with every punishing thrust, and that caused my cock to drag over the soft sheets beneath me. It felt fucking incredible, but at the same time, it was a tease because I couldn’t get what I needed out of it.
I couldn’t say anything to encourage him. My mind and mouth were no longer connected as pleasure crashed over me. I liked sex and had never had a problem feeling good during, but this went beyond anything I’d ever experienced.
I was crying out and moaning, that much I knew, but for the life of me, I couldn’t bring myself to care about what I was saying.
The only things I could focus on in that moment were Zander’s dick as it brought me to a level of pleasure I hadn’t thought possible, his hands as he gripped my ass hard enough to make my skin ache, and his voice as he grunted and gasped random words I couldn’t quite focus on.
Then two things happened— Zander angled his hips so he was fucking down into me instead of straight in, and my cock rubbed over a wrinkle in the bedsheets.
“Fuck!”
Now he wasn’t just sliding over my prostate, he was hitting it full on, and my body instantly reacted.
My thighs cramped as my body tightened. A tingle so strong it felt like pins and needles spread out through my lower back, and I lost the ability to focus on anything other than my impending orgasm.
When my pleasure finally broke, it was as though a floodgate was opened up. Waves of pure ecstasy moved through my body as I shot my load onto my sheets, my hands still braced on the headboard.
I was barely aware of Zander’s rhythm faltering as my body clenched and desperately tried to hold him deep inside me so I could ride out the orgasm, and thankfully, he understood and paused.
“Fuck, oh fuck. Holy shit.” I let my arms flop down as my entire body sagged into the mattress. I felt boneless and charged with electricity at the same time, and I loved it.
When my brain finally came back online and I was aware of my surroundings, I realized that Zander was still buried deep inside me, his cock so hard it felt like granite.
Having a normal orgasm usually made my ass sensitive, but it would seem a hands-free one amplified that, and when Zander started to move again, there was a little pain mixed in with the residual pleasure.
I tried to deal with it, but once the glow of my orgasm wore off, I couldn’t stop the tiny grunts from escaping my lips as I grabbed at the sheets. I felt bad for coming so quickly and was determined to hold out so Zander could find his orgasm.
As he snapped his hips, driving deep inside me at a fast and hurried pace, it started to hurt.
I shifted slightly, trying to move so he couldn’t get quite as deep inside me, but I couldn’t completely cover my whimpers of pain.
Even in his state, Zander was able to sense that I needed a break, and he suddenly pulled out of me. The exit was abrupt and left me feeling a bit empty, but then I heard the condom snapping off and looked over my shoulder at him.
Zander was jacking off over me, his hand moving furiously up and down his shaft as he stared at my ass. His expression was so primal and intense it caused a shiver to run up my spine, and I couldn’t have looked away if I’d wanted to.
As his breathing hitched, Zander looked up from my ass, and when his eyes connected with mine, his back bowed, and his warm cum splashed down on my ass, with a bit hitting my lower back.
I’d never thought of an orgasm as being beautiful. Most looked painful or even a bit goofy, but everything from the way Zander’s muscles were straining to the sated expression on his face was beautiful.
“Fuck, Kai.” Zander shook his head, one hand still gripping his cock, as he looked down at me.
“That was fucking hot,” I blurted out, and he grinned before moving down my legs.
As he bent his head towards my body, my brain almost short-circuited, and when he delicately licked his cum off my skin I shuddered and moaned as my dick twitched in appreciation. When he sat up, I could see a tiny bit was left on his lip, and my mouth started watering.
I loved seeing that in porn, but I’d never met a guy who was into cum play, or that I felt comfortable asking to do that for me.
Taking advantage of our sweat-slicked bodies, I wriggled around so I was on my back and sat up. Zander’s arms wrapped around me as he bent his head and kissed me.
I moaned deep in my throat when I tasted a hint of his essence and was glad when he didn’t stop kissing me right away.
He gently pushed me back and lay us down, his big body covering mine in that way I loved so much.
After a few minutes, Zander broke the kiss, giving me a few nipping pecks before rolling onto his back so he could lay on the mattress.
I pushed my hair back off my face as I tried to get my composure back, and when Zander reached out and pulled my body against his in a soft cuddle, I sighed.
I honestly hadn’t expected any sort of contact after we were done. I loved being held probably more than the average guy, but this hadn’t seemed like a cuddling type of hookup.
It was true it had moved out of just fucking as soon as we’d spent the better part of the encounter kissing, but I still hadn’t dared to hope for more.
“That was amazing,” I blurted out. Apparently, my verbal filter had left with my orgasm.
Zander looked down at me, a smile on his lips.
“Yes, it was.”
His tone was soft, almost gentle, and it made me feel safe to say whatever was on my mind without fear of being judged.
“I’ve never come hands-free before,” I confessed.
“Really? Not even by yourself?” He pulled me closer so I could rest my chin on his chest as I looked up at him.
“I’ve tried, but it never happened.”
“How was it?” he asked playfully.
“Fucking awesome.” I grinned. “Now I get what all the hype is about.”
Zander chuckled as he leaned down to kiss the top of my head, and that casual move sent a wave of longing through me.
This is what I missed about not being in a relationship. It wasn’t the sex; I could do that on my own. It was the casual intimacy.
I missing feeling a strong body next to mine, hearing a heartbeat as I lay on a warm chest. I missed just talking with someone who wasn’t related to me, my best friend, or through a computer screen.
I was a tactile person as much as I tried to pretend I wasn’t. I loved to be held and to be able to touch and be touched without thought. I missed the comfort and security of it, and there was something about Zander that comforted and relaxed me in a way I hadn’t felt in a long ass time.
“Do you want my number before I go?” Zander asked hesitantly like he was afraid I’d say no.
“Yeah, definitely. You want mine too?” I tried to hide my excitement at the idea that he might want to see me again.
“Yeah.” Zander untangled himself from me and climbed off the bed so he could get his phone out of his pants pocket. He unlocked it and handed it to me.
I put my number in and waited as he created a contact listing for me, then sent me a text. I heard my phone vibrate against the floor where it was still trapped in my jeans and smiled.
“So, one of us call the other, and we’ll get together again?” he asked, looking up from his phone.
 
; Again, there was an air of vulnerability surrounding him, and I couldn’t help noticing he’d said we could get together, not that we could go out. While a part of me was disappointed, I shook it off and smiled as I nodded. Another night like tonight would be worth not getting to go out on a date with him.
“I should go, let you get some sleep before your test.”
“Probably a good idea.”
It was after midnight, and while that wasn’t exactly late for me, I did need to get a decent night’s sleep so I could concentrate tomorrow.
I watched as Zander pulled his clothes on, marveling at how gorgeous he was, and when he was dressed I grabbed my pajama pants and slipped them on.
“You don’t have to walk me out.”
“It’s okay. I need to lock the door.”
“Oh, right.”
Zander paused to let me go first and then followed me to the door. I pulled it open and looked up at him.
Now it was time for the awkward goodbye. We’d already done the whole “call me” part, and we’d done plenty of kissing, so I wasn’t expecting another one at the door. My gut was telling me to shut up and let him take the lead, but my head had other ideas.
“I’ll see you?” I asked, moving up on my tiptoes as I leaned into him.
Zander met my kiss without hesitation, and when we pulled apart he nodded.
“Definitely.”
He gave me one last smile, the cocky one that melted me every time, and started down the hall.
I watched until he disappeared through the back door and then stepped back into my apartment, making sure to lock the door.
As I headed to my room, I tried not to grin like an idiot, but I failed miserably.
It was crazy to think that six hours ago I’d been moping on my couch and that a meeting for wings with my best friend would lead to Zander and me ending up in bed together, again.
Chapter Nine
Zander
Now that I had Kai’s number it was burning a hole in my pocket, or my phone if I wanted to get technical.
On Monday afternoon while I was getting ready to go to the gym I had the urge to text him and ask how his test had gone.