The Black Notebook

by Isabelle Snow

  Is that really what you want? my mind whispered.

  I didn’t answer the question—both Colin’s and my own. I sat there for a while, thinking it over, until finally I rolled my eyes and said, “Oh, alright.”

  As I started to get up, Colin pumped his fist in the air and half-whispered, half-yelled, “Yes! Who knew I was so good at convincing people?”

  I narrowed my eyes at him suspiciously. “We’ll just get some food real quick and then come back, okay?”

  “Yeah, yeah, sure, whatever—come on!” he said excitedly and then reached out to grab my hand. I didn’t have the time to digest the sensation of his skin against mine because Colin pulled me towards the door of the library, his steps quick and light.

  I was just about to tell him that we were surely going to be seen, but I glanced up at the teachers’ office and found Mr. Zach leaning back in a recliner and reading a comic book with a black pair of headphones covering his pink little ears.

  He probably wouldn’t hear a thing even if some monk was standing right in front of him and banging on a gong like there was no tomorrow.

  Nevertheless I tried not to let my sneakers squeak against the polished floor as we raced down the empty hall. Colin was dashing off like a leopard on the trail of prey, his long legs easily carrying him across the floor, while I was just stumbling along after him.

  But I had to admit that the feeling was amazing—the pumping of your heart in your chest, the wind in your hair, and the bounce in your feet that’s almost like flying.

  By the time we reached the entrance of the school building, though, the feeling was gone and I was left wheezing like a dying horse.

  “See? It wasn’t so bad, right?” he asked, grinning at me and not even looking close to tired.

  “Please…that was…nothing,” I panted, trying to keep up my smile.

  Colin laughed and said, “Okay, come on. I know a convenience store really close by.” He moved to open the door but I held him back by his forearm.

  “Wait,” I said, “I forgot to bring my umbrella.”

  “It’s no biggie,” he said, raising his voice over the roar of the rain as he swung the door open. “We can share my coat!” He pulled the collar of his coat open and draped it over both of our heads. I had to scoot in closer to him, our sides pressed up against each other so that I could fit underneath. “Ready?”

  I nodded quietly, suddenly forgetting how to use my vocal chords while I was this close to Colin. We ducked out of our shade and into the rain. My fingers found their own way to Colin’s shirt, gripping it as we ran. Our shoes and jeans got wet from the puddles but we didn’t stop until we were at the driver’s side of the car.

  Colin fumbled with the keys for a moment, and once the door was unlocked, he pushed me in. I slid into the car and then hopped over to the passenger seat so that he could take the spot behind the wheel. After slamming the door shut, he turned the key in the ignition and immediately switched the heater on. My hands were numb from the cold.

  “Next stop: the convenience store,” Colin said, smiling.

  It was only when we’d pulled out of the school’s parking lot and my fingers felt more or less alive, did I take in the interior of Colin’s pickup truck. It was pretty clean, but not spotless as if it had its dashboard wiped three times a day. I’d been in other guys’ cars and I knew a couple that were obsessed like that with their ‘babies’.

  He had some schoolbooks littered on the backseat, and a backpack had been carelessly thrown onto the car floor by my feet. I didn’t want to look into his glove compartment or risk being called a creep but I did take a clandestine sniff. His truck smelled like—well, him.

  As I shifted in the leather seat, I wondered how many girls had sat in the very spot I was in. Maria was one of them. I remembered her asking for a ride from Colin during that party. My stomach clenched at the memory of the party. I remembered Kiera and the game and the fact that Colin had kissed her—

  “We’re here,” Colin said, his voice breaking through my reverie. The car jerked to a stop as he parked beside a blue Chevy.

  He hopped out of the car, shielding himself from the harsh hits of the rain with his coat again. He ran over to my side of the car and clicked open the door. “Come on,” he told me and then I was right back underneath the coat with him.

  We sprinted towards the one-story building with a glowing sign that beckoned us like a beacon of light.

  Inside, it was empty save for an Asian guy who sat behind a counter playing a game on his phone, and a middle-aged woman shopping quietly.

  I’d never been to this particular convenience store before but it was designed just like any other: aisles stacked with bags of chips, candies, delightful snacks and other kinds of prepared food. There were three refrigerators humming with life containing cold drinks; a side bar with a hot water dispenser and packets of coffee, cream and sugar; and four tables high off the ground, surrounded by stools.

  “Go ahead and take a seat,” Colin said, nodding at one of the stools. I did as I was told while he walked off to the aisles and took something I couldn’t see. He turned to the counter and handed them to the Asian guy. After paying for them, he went to me and gave me what looked like a red Styrofoam cup. It had some foreign words that I couldn’t understand and was sealed at the top.

  “Instant cup noodles?” I asked.

  “Yup,” he said, taking his own cup noodles in one hand and grabbing my wrist with the other. He dragged me towards the side bar and started ripping the seal off.

  “But I already ate breakfast,” I said and then flipped the cup around to look for the price tag, “and how much do I owe you?”

  “It’s just noodles. It’s light on the stomach,” he said, tearing a packet of ingredients that he found inside the cup with his teeth. He poured the contents on the dried noodles. “And you don’t owe me anything; it’s okay. Oh, that reminds me.” He reached into his pocket and brought out a few bills. He shoved them into my hand.

  “Wait, what for?” I was more than a little surprised at the money he was suddenly giving me.

  “Think of it as my compensation for buying me and my friends’ lunch yesterday,” he said, shrugging.

  “You mean when I was your slave?”

  “What, did you really think I’d make you pay for all that?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at me in surprise. A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he emptied another packet over the cup. “Geez, have some faith in me.”

  “Okay, but what about this?” I asked, raising the cup in my hand.

  He laughed and said, “Stop worrying already. It’s my treat.”

  I didn’t have a response to that, so I just pocketed the money and took the little folded part of the seal, pulling it to open the cup. Seeing as it was already paid for, I figured I might as well eat it.

  As I tried to mirror what Colin had done with the packets, I sneaked glances at him from the corner of my eye. He was already moving towards the dispenser to fill his cup.

  I was still hesitant on believing that he paid me back and bought me something—although it wasn’t that expensive anyway—just because he was being nice. Was Colin being nice?

  I shook my head. No way. If he were being nice, he would hand me back the black notebook. He said that I should have some faith in him, but how could I when he’d been laughing at all of my failed attempts to get back what was rightfully mine?

  Speaking of the black notebook, this was a pretty good chance to strike. But what plan could I use? I’d been too excited over the baby yesterday to think of another one.

  I pressed a button on the dispenser and steaming hot water fell in a steady stream into my cup. I watched as Colin moved towards our table, holding his hot cup with the tips of his fingers and blowing at the steam. When I was satisfied with the amount of water, I stopped the hot water and started walking to our table as well.

  Colin told me to wait for the noodles to softe
n before mixing it, and while I did, thunder rumbled outside.

  Just like that, I suddenly remembered what my dad told me about reverse psychology. A plan, albeit a small one, started to form in my head, but I was still a little doubtful that it would actually work.

  “Okay, I think it’s ready,” Colin announced, stabbing his noodles with a plastic fork and unearthing the spices that had drifted underneath. I did the same with mine and decided that I wouldn’t know if I didn’t try.

  I cleared my throat as Colin slurped the noodles into his mouth hungrily. “So, um, I was thinking. You said the money’s compensation for the lunches I bought for you and your friends, right?”

  He merely grunted as he began on another forkful of noodles.

  “Well, why not just give me back the black notebook instead of money?” I asked, scooping up a modest amount of noodles and slurping on them. It was hot and the ingredients we’d poured made it spicy, but it was delicious.

  He bit on the noodles to cut them off and laughed as he chewed. “Because I’m not ready to give it back,” he said simply.

  “What! Why?” I asked. I felt the blood drain from my face. “Don’t tell me—are you copying the secrets I wrote in there?”

  Colin looked horrified that I’d even suggested it. “No! I wouldn’t do that,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m just…waiting to see what other plans you have left.” With a naughty smirk, he turned back to his noodles.

  Here comes the drama, I thought as I scowled at him. “You know what? Forget it. I’m tired of—of this stupid sick game that you’re playing on me. You can have the black notebook if you want it so much.” I looked away and focused on eating my noodles, drinking the soup angrily—if there was an angry way of drinking soup—and waited for Colin to call my bluff, to say that he would keep the black notebook to himself.

  But to my shock and relief, Colin snapped his head towards me and asked, “Wait, what? Why?”

  I fought the urge to grin. It worked! It actually worked!

  I narrowed my eyes in an attempt to glare at Colin. “Why do you think? It doesn’t look like you’ll be giving it back to me anyway. No matter what plans I try to come up with, you’ll always just overthrow them and laugh at my face.” I tried to play the victim card, and from the worried look on Colin’s face, the black notebook was practically already in my hands.

  I could taste sweet, sweet victory.

  “Seven,” Colin said, reaching out to touch my forearm. “You’re not serious, are you?”

  It was pretty hard to think properly with his hand on my arm like that, but I did my best by deepening my scowl. “Of course I am! I’m not like you, Colin. I don’t always make fun of everything.” I rolled my eyes for good measure.

  Colin opened his mouth, perhaps to apologize or admit defeat. I never knew because suddenly he just stopped, as if he realized something. Seconds ticked by and my stomach twisted into a knot when he still wasn’t cowering in defeat like I expected him to. And then his lips curled into a smile as he said, “Okay.”

  My head turned so fast that I heard my bones cracking. “Say what?”

  “You don’t want your black notebook anymore? Fine,” he said, shrugging as if it couldn’t be helped, “but don’t eat your words later on.”

  “No! Wait, I-I-I take it back!” I quickly stammered, waving my hands around.

  Colin burst into manic laughter. He went on for a while like that, clutching his stomach and slamming his fist on the table while my face turned redder and redder each time. He was making so much noise in the now empty store that the Asian guy gave us a dirty look.

  When he was done, he wiped a nonexistent tear from his eye and chuckled. “Whew, that was a good laugh.”

  “I hate you so much right now,” I grumbled, frowning.

  He laughed and ruffled my hair playfully, saying, “I love you too.”

  Those four words made me freeze, the frown disappearing like vapor. Did he really just say that?

  I slowly raised my head. Colin still had his hand in my hair but he’d stopped mussing it. He just sat there, mouth hanging slightly open and eyes wide. It lasted for only a second, and in the next he was grinning and returning to his cup noodles. It was so quick that I almost convinced myself that I was just imagining things.

  I turned back to my own cup noodles and busied myself with filling my mouth. I tried not to think about what he’d just said, but every time my mind replayed the scene my cheeks grew hotter. I drank the soup quicker, the burning in my throat distracting me from already distracting thoughts.

  After several intakes of the soup, I was starting to think that I’d transformed into a dragon or something. I was practically spewing coals. “Colin, so…hot,” I coughed.

  “That’s what she said,” he coughed back, tears welling up in his eyes. “First one to finish wins. Loser buys the water.”

  I shook my head. I didn’t think I could take another spoonful.

  “Come on,” he said, fanning himself with his hand, “we have to get back anyways. Ready?”

  It looked like he wouldn’t let me out of this one so I closed my eyes and nodded weakly.

  “Go!” he rasped and practically dove towards his cup noodles. I frantically scooped up all the noodles at the very bottom of the cup and chewed them as fast as I could. I cut a glance towards Colin and saw him hurriedly drinking the soup with his spoon, the reddish liquid decreasing at an incredible rate.

  Maybe it was some kind of competitive bone that I didn’t know I had in my body, but I knew I wasn’t going to let him win.

  I threw the spoon down on the table and took the cup with two hands, bringing the brim to my mouth. I chugged on the remaining soup, each gulp feeling like I was swallowing fire.

  I slammed the cup on the table with a bang and took a deep breath. I was done! I turned to Colin, expecting to see him giving me a smug smile and tease me for being such a loser, but I was surprised to see him still struggling to finish his cup noodles.

  “I won…I actually won!” I exclaimed. I knew it was only a small petty challenge but it felt nice to win against Colin for once. I hopped off the stool and did a little victory dance. “I won! Oh yeah, I won! In your face, Colin!”

  Colin watched me from his seat, his chin propped against his fist. “Yes, it is in my face,” he said, smiling. He almost seemed satisfied. With a chuckle, he got off the stool. “I’ll go buy the water.”

  I was a little bummed that he wasn’t sulking like a spoilt child, but I wasn’t going to let him rain on my parade. Once I got the bottle of water in my hands, I downed its contents in record time, the cool liquid washing out the spice and soothing my throat.

  “Alright, we need to ditch this place,” Colin said, pointing to the silver clock above the doors. It showed that we had half an hour of detention left.

  We threw away the now empty cups and left the premises. I wasn’t quite sure, but I thought I heard the Asian guy sigh, “Finally.”

  It wasn’t raining outside anymore so I didn’t have to share a coat with Colin, sadly. When we’d both climbed into the truck, he turned to me and asked, “So. Any regrets?”

  I shook my head with a satisfied smile. “Nope,” I said, twisting my neck to look over at him, “I actually had fun.”

  Colin grinned at my answer and ran his tongue over his lips as he looked away, preparing to drive the car out of there.

  It was the truth. Although, yes, I wasn’t able to get the black notebook back again, I definitely couldn’t say that I’d wasted my morning. I also couldn’t say that I’d bored myself to death, which I probably would’ve if I’d chosen to stay behind at school.

  It only took a little while for us to get back at school. We burst through the entrance of the building and ran down the hallways, only slowing down when we were near the library. We skidded to a halt and Colin craned his neck to check on Big Zach. He gestured to me that everything was clear, and then we both tiptoed back i
nto the room.

  I slid into my seat and took my abandoned book while Colin buried his face in his arms, pretending to have slept the entire time.

  After a few minutes, I heard Big Zach yawn from the other room. Something creaked and after a nasty sneeze, he hobbled into the room, the fingers clutching his comic book now stained with cheesy powder. “Alright, you guys are dismissed,” he announced and, without waiting for our response, walked back to the teachers’ office.

  “That was close,” I whispered, pressing a hand to my still pounding heart when I knew he was out of earshot.

  “Not close enough,” Colin said, chuckling under his breath as he shouldered his backpack and started to get up. Something went ding! and he immediately shoved his hand into his pocket to pull out his phone.

  As he stared at the screen, he said, “Oh, I’ve got to go. You’re going to be okay after this?”

  “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” I asked, slowly backing out of the room.

  “Oh, I don’t know,” he said, looking at his phone and rolling his eyes, “maybe you’ll manipulate the cab driver with your say-one-thing-mean-the-other trick just so that you can get a smaller fee. You never know—maybe he won’t figure it out as fast as I did.” He tried and failed to stifle his snickers.

  It took me a minute to understand what he was getting at, and when I finally did, I was having a pretty hard time trying not to throw my book at his head right then and there.

  I didn’t think that joke needed a reply so, I clenched my jaw, turned on my heels, and started making my way out of there. Colin didn’t go after me—not that I was expecting him to—but I heard his laugh echo in the empty hallway. He called after me, “If it makes you feel any better, you helped make today the best birthday for me!”

  That would’ve normally made me giddy with happiness. But right then, I didn’t care. I walked away fuming, both at the fact that Colin was rubbing it in my face that I’d failed pathetically—which I was already aware of without any of his help—and at myself. Birthday boy or not, he was a jerk. I was supposed to hate him.