MOM:
Do I need to bring you some clothes?
ME:
Yeah, I’ll let you know what I need and maybe bring them over tomorrow. I can borrow a pair of shorts from Max for tonight.
MOM:
Sounds good. Give Sarah and Ella my love.
ME:
I will. They are both sleeping.
MOM:
Get some rest. I love you honey
ME:
Love you too.
I put my phone on the night stand. I move Sarah closer to me and she snuggles into me tighter. I love having her in my arms. I feel whole, complete and secure which sounds weird coming from a man. We both fall asleep but I’m wakened quickly about an hour later to getting a feeling that something just wasn’t right. I gently remove Sarah from my side and get up to check on Ella. I walk over to see the bassinet empty. I run to the crib and nothing. I’m listening for a sound outside of the bedroom, again all quiet. I look back to Sarah to make sure she’s still sleeping. I walk out to the living room/kitchen area to see Sarah’s mom holding Ella.
“Was she fussing?” I ask Elizabeth.
“No, but I came home and checked on Sarah to see you two sleeping in the same bed. Ella shouldn’t wake up to see that.”
“She is only a few days old; it’s not going to scar her for life to see her parents napping together besides I was on the top of the covers.” Elizabeth looks me up and down. “What is it that you don’t like about me?” I point blank stare at her.
“You had sex with my daughter without getting her name? In my day and time, you waited until marriage and Sarah knew better. She was not raised to be fast and loose.” Fast and loose really? Who talks like that?
“I hated how things happened and ended. I’m not sorry that it happened because we wouldn’t have Ella. I searched everywhere for her. Do you know how many private investigators charge you just to have them laugh at you because all you had to go one was long beautiful blonde hair, big expressive blue eyes, and a smile that goes straight to the heart? It cost me close to $20,000.”
“You have money?”
“Yes, I do. My family is very comfortable and I make a good living. My kids’ college funds are taken care of thanks to my grandparents and I add to it monthly as well. Ella will be set up with the same fund.”
“We can take care of Ella just as well.”
“I’m not saying you can’t but this is how my family works.”
“Why should I accept you for the man for Sarah?” Elizabeth snaps. I understand her concern but I want to tell her so bad to fuck off, it’s none of her damn business. Out of respect for Sarah and Ella I’ll answer her questions.
“Ella is my daughter so I’m always going to be around even if Sarah and I don’t make it. Have you ever had a love that stops time when the other person walks into a room, or when you have that person in your arms that you finally feel complete? I have that with Sarah. I’ve never had that not even with my ex-wife. I don’t deserve Sarah and I will spend every day of our lives together proving to her that I’m worthy of her and Ella.” I reach over to feel Ella’s fingers. “Mrs. Edwards, we are not always going to agree on things but first and foremost, Ella is mine and Sarah’s, we’ll raise her as we see fit. I love how protective you are of both of them but you need to respect us if you want to be respected.”
“No one has spoken to me like this before. I’m not a perfect mother and I want to prove to her that I can be a better mother and I have a clean slate with Ella. I do things my way without thinking of consequences like ruining that perfect nursery that Sarah did. It was beautiful.”
“Mrs. Edwards, have you talked to Sarah about all of this? When we started to get to know each other, she told me about the legal problems between the two of you. I have a suggestion and you can take it or not but start out slow in rebuilding things with Sarah. Don’t try too hard but try. I’m taking Sarah out on a first date in a few days and we would like you and Mr. Edwards to babysit Ella for us. We’ll be gone for a few hours and my kids might be over here since it will be Friday night. It would be nice for you to get to know them too because someday they could be your grandchildren too.” I wink at her and she blushes.
“Jensen, we would be honored to babysit our granddaughter. I’ll let Sarah know to leave a schedule for her feedings and sleep. I’m going to talk to my husband about how to repair us and Sarah.”
“I hope it works out for you but make sure that you know there might be some resistance but go at Sarah’s pace.”
“How do you know so much about this?” Ella is looking up at her grandmother with such awe as her necklace as the light reflects from it to make it sparkle.
“My kids are meeting their biological mother for the first time in twelve years. We’ve been going through therapy for years about this day plus, I’ve learned a lot from your wonderful daughter. I think this was her way of inadvertently putting it out there what she needs from you. I don’t know I’m just a man.”
“A very special man. I should have taken my daughter’s word about you, but I was worried that she was being taken advantage of because of her money. I’m often jealous of Sarah and I project that out too much especially onto her. I hope that she will forgive me and let me back in.”
“Do you mean that?” We all turn to see Sarah standing there. Damn she put on shorts. Sarah comes to sit in my lap. I rub her back.
“Are you okay? Need anything to eat or drink? When was the last time you took the antibiotic?”
“I’m good. I’m where I need to be.” She lays her head on my shoulder and kisses my neck.
“Your mom has agreed to watch Ella for us on Friday night and is going to get to know Jana and Bennett since they’ll be here this weekend.”
“I’ll let you two talk and I’m going to put this sleeping baby back in her crib so you two can talk.”
“Mom should we talk?”
“We’ll talk later. Enjoy your peace and quiet with your man.” Mrs. Edwards winks as she whispers something to Ella.
“What happened between the two of you?” Sarah asks me as she puts her arms around me so she can straddle me. She is going to kill me yet.
“Like you don’t already know?” I point to the baby monitor sitting on the coffee table. Sarah scrunches her nose looking almost childlike which makes me laugh.
“Thank you for talking to her. I hope we can fix things, I want Ella to know her grandparents but it will be on my terms. I remember growing up with them and I can’t let her be a pawn.”
“I know baby. One day at a time. Now will you be okay if I ran home to get some clothes and see the kids?”
“Yeah my mom is here with me.” Sarah kisses me gets off my lap. I smack her in the ass and she yelps.
“That’s for the no wearing underwear at naptime.” Sarah heads into her room where I see her mom sitting in the rocking chair; it looks like she is crying.
“Want me to grab something for dinner to cook?” I yell and Sarah yells out her door that she would love a lasagna. I shake my head as I leave the apartment. My mother makes a mean lasagna and I hope that I can do her justice.
ME:
Coming home for my clothes. Sarah wants lasagna so I need a recipe.
MOM:
LOL it’s not rocket science
I laugh as I put the car into reverse.
I smile as I walk into the bathroom. I told my mother that I needed to quick shower but to listen for me because I might need help. When I was listening to Jensen professing his love about me to my mom and defending me made me want to run out there and strip his clothes off. I take my time to shower because stretching certain ways is like a stabbing pain to my vagina. Dr. May did tell me to start stretching even if it hurts because I need to start using the muscles.
“Mom, I need help.” I yell after I shut the water off. My mother is standing in the bathroom like she was waiting on me.
“What can I do?”
“Help me out because I
stretched and I’m sore. Then help dry me off?”
“Of course,” My mother grabs my hands and helps steady me as I step out of the shower. She takes to slowly drying me off and she is tender the entire time. “Let me know if I’m being too rough.”
“You are being amazing. Thank you.” After we were done she helps me into my leggings and Jensen’s t-shirt that I stole from his house while I was packing and he was gone. I crawl into bed and my mother starts to leave but I ask her to stay.
“Did you mean what you said to Jensen earlier?”
“He told you?”
“No, the baby monitor was out there and I heard your conversation.”
“Yes, I meant every word. Jensen has a way of getting you to talk.” She laughs and I nod. “I need to rebuild your trust and coming in to take over the nursery is not the way to do it. I guess I got jealous that you wanted to be around his family and not yours.”
“Mom it wasn’t like that. I fell asleep because I didn’t sleep much in the hospital and it gave Jensen’s grandmother who is older than my grandmother was when she died a chance to get to build some memories while Jensen and his parents took pictures so Ella would always have a piece of her great grandmother.”
“I always jump to the wrong conclusion, don’t I?”
“Yes, you always jump to the worst possible situation but that is one way we are alike. I ran from Jensen because he stopped talking to me about selling his old house so we can buy a new house together.”
“We need to fix this jumping to conclusions.” We laugh because we know that will never work because it’s how our brains are wired. I look around the room for my laptop and spot it on my dresser. I ask her to get it for me. I fire it up and we start house shopping or house dreaming.
“This is one that I love because it gives all three kids their own bathroom and we still have room for guests. This master bedroom has everything I want with and his and her bathrooms because I don’t want to be smelling what comes out of his ass. The closet wouldn’t need a redoing either because it’s already a his and hers walk-in. We would only have to take our time in redoing the downstairs and since I know this amazing designer and architect duo that will not charge me a lot.”
“This house is gorgeous and it’s like in the middle of everyone, Abby and Cash live there,” my mother points out on the map, “We live there, Max and Reagan here and his parents live there, right?” I nod. “What happens if he doesn’t want to move out of his house?”
“He doesn’t have to. I have enough money and excellent credit to get this on my own. I will make the rooms up for Jana, Bennett and Jonathan so they feel like it’s their home too.”
“You don’t want to raise her on your own, do you?” I let out a sad sigh as I look towards the crib.
“No, I don’t but I can’t force him to sell his home, just like he can’t force me to move into his house that he shared with another woman.”
“Is that the whole reason why you don’t want to move there?”
“Part of it is that reason. I mean he made a home with this woman before she left. I also know that the house holds sentimental value to him as he raised his kids there. I want a fresh start mom a place of my own with my kids. I’ve always had to live in someone else’s house, grams, then yours, then, Max’s house, Abby and Cash’s and now Reagan and Max’s apartment. I need a place that I can call my own. Does that make sense?”
“It does but talk to him about it more and don’t run from him. The worst thing you can do is not resolve things. Daddy and I came close to divorcing so many times over the years because we wouldn’t listen to each other but talk over each other. It makes things hard on a relationship.”
“I didn’t know you and dad were almost divorced. How did I not know this?”
“We hid it pretty good. I even cheated on your father because I wanted to feel again. It woke your dad up because we started dating each other again and falling in love with each other. We have been in counseling and have been good ever since except that time where we sued you.” My mother tries to hide her tears.
“Mom, don’t. I need to see you vulnerable. I want to see you the real you. No more hiding.” We hug as we look at other houses. She even found one that she liked for her and dad that had enough room for grandchildren to visit. I yawn and realize that I need to take a pain pill after I stretched.
“Why don’t you sleep? I’ll take care of Ella until Jensen gets here.”
“Thank you. Is there anything over there that I can drink?”
“Yes, it’s warm water. I’ll get some more for you.”
“It will do for now. Wait until I wake up to bring me something. I hate how the pain and pills knock me out. I rather sleep through the first moments of the really bad pain plus I’m also missing out on Ella time.”
“Baby, you have a lifetime of Ella time. You need to heal so you can be with her.” My mother says as she runs her hand over my cheek. I smile up at her and close my eyes. For the first time in a long time, I feel closer to my mother.
Date night
Reagan, Abby and Nicarra are here to help me with my nerves for my first date with Jensen. They are doing nothing but making me more nervous.
“So, do you think she’ll get some tonight?” Nicarra says making her hips gyrating.
“I can’t have sex for another seven weeks but he might get lucky.” I use my toothbrush as if it was Jensen’s cock. The girls laugh and there is a knock on the door.
“This room seems to be where all the fun is at, so what are we talking about?” Jana walks in and climbs on the bed. I feel my face get red. Reagan moves her tongue to inside her cheek which makes me laugh.
“Honey, it’s a silly joke between us. So how are you doing?”
“I’m okay. What are you wearing out for your date with daddy?” I looked down to my bathrobe. Good question Jana but not sure I say to myself.
“What is your dad wearing?” I question Jana with a smile on my face.
“I’m sworn to secrecy but I can tell you that he is wearing black dress pants and a blue button-down shirt. Oh wait, I just told you.” We all laugh and I hug her.
“I won’t let him know that you told me.” I wink at her and go to my closet. I know the perfect dress to wear now. I look through it trying to remember where I hung it up. I’m a little OCD so my closet is driving me crazy because I have my clothes separated by unpacking instead of by color.
“There it is.” I grunt out as I pull it off the bar in my closet. I run into the bathroom to change. I made sure to lock the other bathroom door because my mother walked in on Jensen getting out of the shower. The way she screamed and then avoided looking at him that entire day was very funny to us. I look into the mirror to do my makeup and I open my red lipstick. I spent hours on my hair trying to get it curly with a little bounce and I finally achieved it. I take one last look in the mirror and open the door to the bathroom.
“If I was into girls.” Reagan says and I laugh. I walk over to my closet to find my blue high heels and I hold up a darker shade and a lighter so Jana can give me a hint. Jana points to the light blue shoes. Jana looks defeated.
“Hey, you will learn in this group, when men tell someone what they are wearing it’s to tell us what we need to wear. Do you think Max and Jonathan sit around talking about what he’s going to wear? It’s so we can be the most fashionable couple there but don’t ever tell us where they are taking us, we like a little surprise.”
“I guess I have a lot to learn.” Jana says with a confused look on her face.
“Stick with us kid and we will teach you right.” Nicarra says with an evil laugh then tickles Jana. “Man, I need a daughter; you and Ella can be my surrogate daughters. I can teach you all the fun stuff that will drive your dad nuts.”
“I like it already.” There’s a knock on the door and I answer.
“Wow.” Max can only say before I start snapping my fingers in front of his face. “Oh sorry. I never saw you look so dre
ssed up. I don’t like it. You have a gentleman caller at the door for you.” I look and I don’t see him.
“Where is he?”
“Standing outside the door. He wanted to do this right I guess. Whatever that means.”
“It means that he’s being a gentleman and waiting on his lady instead of yelling, “Hurry up we’re going to miss the time frame for the two for one coupon.” Reagan mocks as she walks out of my room. Max grabs her by the waist to pull her into him and whispers something into her ear that makes her blush. She harshly whispers stop to him.
“Grandparents reporting for babysitting duty.” My father says. “What are you not wearing? Get in there and get the rest of the dress.” I laugh at him and kiss him on the cheek.
“Her schedule is on the changing table. I fed her about three hours ago, and she’s been asleep ever since. The bottle warmer you know how to use and any questions call me. I will have my phone on me. Jana and Bennett like to play with Ella on the floor so they have her area all set up. Play nice everyone.” I grab my purse from my room and look down at my sleeping baby. I kiss her on the head but pause staring down at Ella.
“Honey, what’s the matter?” My mom is standing in the doorway.
“I’m not ready to leave her. How silly is that? I’ve never lived my life for anyone but me. How silly is this?” I wipe the tears flowing down my face.
“This is normal. You also must remember that you are starting to build a solid foundation with the father of this precious baby. You two need this just as much as the three kids need it. Go have fun.” My mother pushes me towards the door and hands me my purse. I hug her and open the door to the man who stole my heart, standing there with a dozen red roses in his hands. I smile at him and he whistles.
“Wow!” I whisper as I turn around when I hear the door opening. I look her up and down then I make the motion for her to turn around. “Slowly please.” Sarah is wearing this white lace dress that goes to slightly above her knees. The dress buttons up the back with no sleeves. This is a Sarah dress and it fits like it was made for her. I lick my lips.
As Long As You Love Me (Love Me Series Book 4) Page 22
