Peppermint Pandemonium: A Cozy Mystery (Sweet Home Mystery Series Book 5)

by Constance Barker

  Ezzy walked over to her brother and tried to comfort him with a hand on his back. He had more to tell.

  “I thought then it would look like some kids came through and did it, and then the insurance company would cover the damage in her place, and she wouldn’t get in trouble either. I pushed some stuffed toys and hats on the floor in the shop next door too, where she cut the big hole, because I knew they wouldn’t break. I…I’m really sorry, but she had been so nice to me the night before, and…”

  He just ran out of gas and stopped talking. Ezzy gave him a quick hug and led him over to her father.

  “Thank you, Daniel.” Eli put his hand on the boy’s shoulder. “You’re a good man. We’ll get a transcript of your story typed up – it looks like the lady over there got a full recording. And we might need you and your dad to stop by later to check it over or to see if you have anything to add, and then you can sign it. I’m not sure what your damages will be for the paint…”

  “No damages for my place – the boy painted over it for me anyway and then did some real nice artwork for me too,” the shopkeeper next door said.

  “No charge on my tent either,” said another.

  “Mine too!”

  Gladys walked over to see what the big gathering was all about.

  “What’s happening here?” she asked.

  “Oh…” I said, “we’re just talking about the vandalism here the first week of the Markets.”

  “Well, that’s good. It’s about time something was done about that. Do they know who the fingerprints belong to on all of our damaged shelves?”

  “Yes, we do,” Eli answered. “And we know who hit Mildred too.”

  “What! Somebody hit Mildred? When? Where is she? Is she okay?”

  Officer Karen Crenshaw arrived on the scene. Jules had texted her the details, and Eli asked her to come in to pick up Gladys.

  “She’s just fine now, Gladys,” Karen said, “but she was in pretty bad shape for a while. I’ll take you to her now.”

  She looked at Eli with a question mark expression as she patted the handcuffs on her belt. Eli shook his head.

  “Come with me, Gladys.”

  “Hold on a minute,” Harvey said. “What about Cora poisoning Miss Pickles?”

  We went through the whole story with Eli and Karen, and then Jules wrapped it up for them:

  “And so, if you test that murky liquid she gave your dad, I’m sure you’ll find the digitalis kind of poison that comes from her oleander plants – and the kibble she gave him should have the…” Jules referred to the webpage on her phone. “…digoxin-specific antibody fragments, or digoxin-Fab, which is the antidote.”

  “She has some kind of mash at her house too, which must have a stronger dose of the real medicine,” I told them.

  “The so-called medicine would get Miss pickles sick one day and keep her from dying the next. The big dose she told him to give her on Christmas Eve would have killed her for sure.”

  Harvey was close to tears when Officer O’Leary walked up with Miss Pickles in his arms. She was resting and seemed a little weak. Eli took the cat and marched fifty feet down the cobblestone path to Dr. Dawson’s booth, and the whole crowd followed him.

  “Hi, Eli!” Sandy greeted him pleasantly and looked at her watch. Cora was smiling next to her. “It’s still a couple of hours before we become Mr. and Mrs. Claus. What can I do for you?”

  He tipped his hat to the two women. “You can give me the antidote for Cora Applegate’s poisonous oleander plants. It seems she’s been using them to keep Miss Pickles here very ill for the past few weeks – and probably a lot of other cats too.”

  Cora face went white and her hands began to shake.

  “Cora…?” Sandy Dawson looked at her trusted tech. “Is this true? What is Officer Davis talking about?”

  Cora looked to one side and then the other. She had nowhere to run. Officer O’Leary went inside the booth and stood behind her as the silent crowd looked on. Then she exhaled with a moan, and all of the tension left her body. She grabbed her purse from beneath the small counter and pulled out a little jar of the healing glop and put some on her finger for Miss Pickles.

  “That’s the good stuff,” Harvey said, and Eli held the cat close to her finger. Miss Pickles quickly licked it off.

  “Cora, why on earth would you want to hurt so many cats?” Dr. Dawson was in a state of disbelief. “I thought you loved animals.”

  “I do love animals.” She paused and looked at Miss Pickles with disdain. “But I can’t stand those furry little killing machines. If they were a little bigger they'd kill us all and never give it a second thought. I hate cats, but…”

  She looked at Harvey, who was trying to make sense of it all as he took his precious cat from his son’s arms.”

  “…but I’m in love with Harvey Davis.”

  Oh, my lord.

  “Ever since the first time I heard his beautiful voice calling out those Bingo numbers, I just couldn’t help myself. There’s something about the way he says ‘Under the B’ and ‘Hold your cards’ that just melts my heart. I thought if I could use his cat’s illness to get close to him, he would see how good we would be together and how well I would take care of him and cook for him. And then I could just get rid of that rat chaser and replace her as the woman in his life – the woman that he really needs.”

  Jules whispered to me as she snapped some shots of Cora and the scene. “Is everybody in this town crazy?”

  I looked at Jules. “Don't you know....everyone's crazy but me and thee....and sometimes I wonder about thee.”

  Jules let out a guffaw.

  “Or maybe Toe and Harvey are just too irresistible,” I suggested.

  “Uhhhh…I think I prefer the crazy theory!”

  “Cuff her, Kevin.”

  The crowd dispersed as Karen and Kevin left with the two suspects or perps or whatever they were.

  “I guess you can’t give me any guff about Gladys now, Harvey,” Toe said with a slight sense of relief. “She almost killed your cat to get close to you.”

  “Oh, there’s my Toe,” Gladys said and tried to break away from Karen. “Toe, dear, I’ll go home and cook your dinner now. Toe likes steak for dinner every night,” she told us all, “and he doesn’t like it when his dinner is late.”

  “We have to go for a little ride first, Gladys,” Karen told her.

  “Okay.”

  “Let’s go and get some coffee,” Toe said to Harvey, and they headed over to the Cabana East.

  “Bye, Miss Pickles.”

  I tried to pet her head, but I was greeted with a roar and a near miss from a swipe of her claws.

  “I guess she’s back to normal!”

  It was just Jules, Eli, Sandy Dawson, and I left at the booth.

  “So, what am I going to do now?” Sandy lamented.

  I tried to comfort her. “Oh, I’m sure you’ll be able to find a lot of qualified veterinary technicians.”

  “No – I mean, I’m supposed to be Mrs. Santa Claus at 3 o’clock, and no one will be here to man my booth. It’s an important night because there’s a big group coming from Sinking Springs, and most of them have cats.”

  “I could help,” Jules offered.

  “I would if I could, Sandy, but I have to work at the coffee booth so Essie can have a day off to shop.”

  “Well, thanks, Lily. And I appreciate that, Jules, but I really need someone who can answer medical questions for pet owners.”

  “Well…”

  I could see the gears turning in Jules’ mind.

  “I know how to run the coffee shop, so I’ll give Essie her day off, and you. Lily Parker, can be Mrs. Santa Claus.”

  “Would you,Lily?” Sandy asked.

  “That’s a great idea!” Eli said with a lot of enthusiasm.

  “Um…”

  “All you have to do is smile and hand out cookies, Lily.”

  With three pairs of wide eager eyes on me, I had to give in. �
��I’d love to!”

  Actually, it might not be so bad pretending to be Eli’s wife.

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  Chapter Eleven

  It was the last day of the Christmas Markets. There were only three days until Christmas Eve, and, with only two hours to go until tear-down, everybody was acting strange. Maybe they were just ready to get back home with their families after three weekends of peppermint mocha pandemonium, attempted murder, cat poisonings, hectic crowds, and shopping.

  “Lily, I have to run to the little girls’ room,” Essie told me and then ran off. It was her third trip in the last hour. Very odd.

  “Six peppermint mocha lattes, two bottles of lemonade, and four hot wassails, Lily.”

  “Lily – a slice of blueberry pie and a chocolate chip muffin.”

  That had to be for Toe and Harvey.

  Eli had been running in and out all day too, whispering with Jules most of the time. Both of them were unusually quiet around me.

  Suddenly I heard a flurry of bells as Santa came walking into the booth. He stopped right in front of me and motioned for Eli to come over. It was Jerry Thatcher in the suit this evening.

  “Eli, I need a favor.” Jerry looked at me and then back at Eli. “I need you to do the last hour for me tonight. I can only go another hour on these fallen arches. Can you meet me at the North Pole at 5 o’clock?”

  Eli looked at me. I shrugged my approval.

  “Sure…Santa. I’ll see you there.”

  It was cool today – only in the mid-60s, and the Florida sun was stubbornly hiding behind a grey cloud.

  “Lily!” It was Jules. “Come in the back with me.”

  “But I have to work the counter…”

  Carmen and Moira Baumgardner appeared out of nowhere and took over for me, and Jules pulled me into storage room in the kitchen.

  “What’s going on, Jules?”

  “Sit,” she commanded. She opened her purse on top of a stack of boxes and pulled out a brush and some makeup. “I just found out there’s going to be a little presentation or something when the Markets close down at 6:00. The festival committee wants to thank and honor the shopkeepers over at the North Pole. So, since I’ll be taking pictures for the newspaper, you need to be looking good.”

  “What? This isn’t going to be some long, drawn out event is it? It’s going to take us a couple of hours to pack everything up, clean the place, and get out of here, and I really want to get home and jump into a nice warm bath.”

  “No, I think it’s just like a ten-minute thing. You’ll walk up front with the other food people and get a handshake, a round of applause, and maybe a certificate or something you can hang on the wall at the Coffee Cabana.”

  She ratted my thin hair and actually made it look pretty good, with the help of some instant highlights and a lot of hairspray. Then she started pouring on the foundation.

  “Jules – is this really necessary? I mean it’s just a handshake and a picture.”

  “Let me have a little fun. The coffee shop is covered, and this is fun for me.”

  Whatever. She gave me smoky eyes, a little pop in the cheeks, and red lips with a penciled edge. She gave me a hand mirror, and I was looking pretty good if I do say so myself.

  “What do you think?”

  “I like it – a lot.”

  Good. Now strip.”

  “Excuse me?”

  She got my nice green dress out of a hanging bag. It had been a little tight the last time I wore it, but it should fit just right again now. It did.

  “A nice color for Christmas, but it’s a little much, don’t you think?”

  “Nope. Now put on these heels. What’s wrong with you being the best-dressed and prettiest girl there?”

  Kind of a far-fetched idea, but I was feeling pretty after all of her hard work. She looked at her watch.

  “Okay. Time to go.”

  We stepped back into the dining hall, and every head turned toward me. Harvey came over and offered me his arm, and we walked out to the cobblestone pathway where Martha White’s pumpkin carriage golf cart was waiting for me.

  Okay, this was very strange. I looked back at Jules and she blew me a kiss.

  “Okay, what’s going on here, Harvey?”

  He helped me into the carriage and got in the driver’s seat. “We’re just taking a little trip to the North Pole.”

  We drove very slowly but everyone stepped to the side to let us through. Ezzy waved to me and then got in the line behind the golf cart and followed us. I turned around to say hello to her, and I saw a whole crowd following us. Essie, Toe, Hildie, Jules – everybody was there. I had to say, I was mystified. At least Eli would be in the Santa suit now, so maybe things would be a little more normal when we got to the North Pole.

  We couldn’t get all the way to the end in the cart, as there was a huge crowd of people between us and Santa’s wonderland. There to see Santa I supposed. We stopped the carriage, and Harvey helped me get out – which was much appreciated since I had on a dress and heels. Then we stood in front of the golf cart. It got eerily quiet.

  I heard some one tap the microphone on the public address system. And then the world changed forever.

  “Five…six…seven…eight!” I hear over the speakers. The entire crowd ahead of us turned around to face me and Harvey as the music for Carol of the Bells started playing loudly. First the men in the crowd started singing:

  Hark how the bells, sweet silver bells

  All seem to say throw cares away

  Then the female voices came in with a beautiful harmony:

  Christmas is here bringing good cheer

  To young and old, meek and the bold…

  They started dancing and twirling and gradually opened up a path for Harvey and me to walk through. I was a little more than suspicious as I turned back to look at Jules. She waved and then signaled me to keep walking. We got to the very front and stood before the North Pole as the song ended. Santa’s throne was empty, and there were several elves standing at attention.

  From behind us I heard a beautiful male voice begin singing.

  I’m dreaming of a white Christmas…

  If I didn’t know better, I would have thought it was Bing Crosby himself. The other voices joined in as the entire Glendenning family dressed in Victorian attire walked around us, the men to our left and the women to our right. It was Enoch Glendenning, the king of the Gypsies and a man a very few words, singing the lead vocal while Ezzy, her mother, brothers, sisters, and cousins all sang along. Even little Joshua was there.

  I heard the muffled sound of a gasoline engine start up, and suddenly there were snowflakes falling from the sky! I caught one on my tongue and twirled around with my arms wide, like a little girl in wonderland. The carolers formed a group to our left and kept singing:

  …with every Christmas card I write.

  I saw one of the elves moving to my right and could see a couple walking onto the edge of the North Pole set.

  “Uncle Doug? Aunt Connie?”

  They waved and I started to move towards them, but Harvey grabbed my arm.

  “Not yet,” he whispered.

  I finally thought I understood: Eli was recreating the magical White Christmas I had as a 5-year-old girl. That was the gift I’d asked for back at the Coffee Cabana a few weeks ago.

  Then, as the final chorus of the song came to an end I felt a kiss on my cheek. I turned quickly.

  “Daddy? What are you doing here?”

  “Merry Christmas, my Tiger Lily.”

  The choir kept humming the beautiful melody that was fast becoming my favorite song of all time, and I heard jungle bells come from the doorway to Santa’s house at the back of the lovely set. My own Santa Claus came out, handed me a bouquet of red and white roses, and took my hand. He guided me up the one step into the North Pole, right in front of his throne. />
  “Thank you,” I said as I turned to see all of the people and camera flashes surrounding us. “So, this is your way of saying ‘Merry Christmas’ this year.” I blew kisses to my aunts, uncle, my dad, and Jules.

  “No,” he said. “It’s my way of saying ‘marry me.’”

  I swung around quickly and saw Eli down on one knee with a small square blue box in his hand. He flipped the top up, and all I could see was glistening sparkles of light.

  “Lily Parker,” he said.

  My whole body began to tremble, and I was sure my knees were going to give out. I looked at Eli’s eyes, and they were calm and confident – while mine were ready to burst.

  “Will you marry me? Will you be my wife for the next 50 years or so?”

  The chorus stopped humming, and only the sound of the engine on the snow machine could be heard. Essie, Hildie, and dad had moved much closer now, and Jules was right up front snapping pictures that I no doubt would cherish forever. I looked up into the beautiful blue-black sky filled with shining white crystals of snow.

  I nodded a big nod that everyone could see. “Yes! Yes I will!”

  The crowd let out a huge cheer, and music and dancing just seemed to spontaneously break out everywhere as Eli swung me around and gave me a kiss on the lips in front of everyone! My dad was first in line for a hug, followed by Jules, Hildie, Harvey, my aunt and uncle from Ohio, Toe, Ezzy and her dad, and finally Essie, who was carrying little Joshua in her arms.

  After a few more hugs, handshakes, and best wishes, Eli sat on Santa’s throne and I finally got my chance to sit on Santa’s knee.

  “Well, Mr. Davis, that was quite the production you put together, all the more impressive because none of these talkative gossip hounds leaked the information. It was really sweet of you to bring my dad and my aunt and uncle.”

  “Well, I had to get a hold of your dad to get his consent, of course, and there was just no keeping him away after that. That day you asked me to help you get a cookie from Mrs. Claus is when I asked Jules if she knew his number. She figured out what I had in mind and showed a little too much excitement.”

  I kissed him on the forehead. “Well, I asked you for a trip to the North Pole for a white Christmas, and you delivered.”