“Nix. Headed somewhere? I just got here.” Bradley stood outside my office door, freshly showered. A towel wrapped around his waist drew my eyes. His body was considerably more defined. I averted my eyes and fought the urge to feel anything for him. Bradley pranced around half-naked on purpose. It didn’t matter how clean he got, the fact remained that he dipped his married stick in someone else. He wasn’t going to get the welcome home lay he was expecting.
“Got work.” I said.
“Nix,” Bradley whispered. “Can we talk, please?” The smell of his soap and shampoo invaded the office. It invaded my head; it was the same scent he had for the last ten years. Although the familiarity of his smell was albeit home, it wasn’t a home for me anymore. I wasn’t going to get lost in a reverie about him now.
I stood behind my desk for a few moments, like it was a shield. His eyes were curiously focused on the large Hello Kitty in the room. “Talk about what?” It was my effort to avoid questions about my new office mate.
“First off, about us.” Bradley stuttered, “Ah-about how you’ve been doing in general. I mean, um, you, you look amazing.”
“Thanks. I’m fine. You’re obviously flourishing in your Army career.” I kept my voice leveled. “Anyway, we’ll proceed with the divorce like you originally wanted four months ago, now that you’re home for a long enough period to get it done.” I gathered my paperwork and danced around Bradley. His larger, more muscular frame and short Army hair cut were menacing, but the sad bulldog look on his face disarmed me for a second. He planted his left arm on the door frame blocking my exit. His black tribal tattoo quivered from the tension. My eyes flickered to his hand and I saw his gold wedding band still on. I expressed my breath loudly and gave him the sternest face I could muster.
“Please, move. I have work to do.” He didn’t budge so I ripped off his towel and flung it out the door and it floated down to the first floor. “Mrs. Yamaguchi is home by the way.” I pointed to the open view of the next unit. Bradley covered his manly parts and I shimmied passed him. As I gamboled down the stairs, Bradley came to the landing exposed, both hands gripping the faux mahogany rails.
“We’ll talk when you get back okay?” I refused to look up at him. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.
“Fine. You’re going to want to call your parents, since they know about the divorce.” With that said, I stepped out into my day—still fresh and new.
Rachel knew that Bradley would be home and I figured she would be checking on me, but I didn’t quite count on how soon that would be. She had called twice during my thirty minute drive to the Charm Coffee Café. I finally called her back after my assessment. I told her that I had another shop to stake out, the same one we visited by the spa. It would take me another thirty minutes to get back south, but I was glad to be away from Bradley. She did better at not shoving Thomas down my throat, but I couldn’t help feeling like a giddy teenager as I told her about his friendly text and delicious picture the night before. While we spoke and I sipped my skinny vanilla latte, I pulled the card from Thomas out of my wallet. I reread his message and smiled.
I was back in Pacific Beach for the second coffee shop pre-visit of the day. I parked near the Diva Spa, keeping my car out of view. It would be nice to get another massage, but the idea of Chazzer touching my body again, especially after his intentions were known was a rancid thought that made me heave. I checked my Blackberry hoping for a text from Thomas when I saw that I had two missed calls from Bradley. He was acting like a hopeless fool. I gave in and called him back. He asked when I would be home. This shift in power in our relationship was like a pair of new, uncomfortable designer shoes that I would have to wear for awhile to break in, but I loved it.
“Bradley, I’ll be home by dinner, don’t bother waiting,” he started to speak and I hung up.
I approached The Drip slowly. I made mental notations of the cleanliness of the store. I observed the outside seating. Two older gentlemen sipped their drinks and smoked. Noted. The smell of coffee and cigarettes, my dad’s two vices, made me suddenly miss him. The glass on the doors was clean and all signage was in good condition. I opened the door and the warm, sweet air of the shop enveloped me. I pretended to be on my phone as I did a quick survey of the café. I could typically count the number of customers present in one sweep, and because it wasn’t necessary to gather physical descriptions of the patrons—I didn’t notice Chazzer and Bret in the far corner.
I lined up behind three customers and scanned the menu board. The door chimed as another customer entered and lined up behind me. I was aware that he or she was a bit too close for my comfort since Mr. I don’t respect personal space bumped into my purse. I didn’t want to make a scene so I half-stepped forward, glanced at my purse to make sure the zipper was zipped and clutched it. The joker behind me stepped up too. If he or she started smelling my hair I was going to do a Tae Kwon Do back kick. Just as the image of a rude person flying through the glass door behind me was playing out in my mind, I heard my name.
“Hi, Phoenix! It’s me Chazzer!” It had been a week since this meathead laid his hands on my body. His voice grated on my nerves and I turned to look at him.
“Hey, there kid. On a break?” I asked. Bret observed with a smile from the safety of his table. Chazzer obviously didn’t like being called a kid from the way his eyebrows furrowed and nearly connected, but he didn’t budge. I stepped forward as the line shortened by one. I begged the barista to call for me. I wanted to shake this dude off my scent.
“Yeah, I was, um, hoping you would have called me by now. I have the afternoon free, being Sunday and all. How about another session, on the house?” This kid must be joking. Saving a hundred bucks did sound appealing though. Snap out of it, Nix!
“I’ve been busy with work and stuff. Thanks for the offer though.” I turned my attention to the menu board again hoping he would get the hint. Mr. Stallion didn’t.
“You can’t pass up a free session by the Chazzer? Come on. You look really tense!” Referring to himself in the third person wasn’t gaining him any points. Then, the fool actually placed his steroid pumped hands on my shoulder. I wriggled free and glared at him.
“Please, don’t do that again.” I warned from clenched teeth. I stepped forward a step and the customer behind me stepped up too by what seemed to be a step and a half. Instantly, Bret was at Chazzer’s side and like dejavu, he was pulling on Chazzer’s muscular arm. Several customers and a cute barista watched us now. I didn’t want to blow my cover before the evaluation. I hated having to disguise myself if it wasn’t necessary. Did I have to dye my hair blue this week? I wanted to diffuse the situation, but I wasn’t about to accept Chazzer’s offer. He knew way too much about my personal life and he probably took note that I wasn’t wearing my wedding ring now. He was a good looking kid who wasn’t used to hearing no.
I kept my eyes forward. Chazzer was in step with me again.
“Hey, Phoenix, I just, you know, really like you and I thought we had some kind of chemistry. You are practically single right? Your friend said that . . .” Was this fool going to broadcast my love life here! And just because someone was single, that didn’t mean they wanted to be attached.
A voice I had only heard in person a few times piped up behind me. It was…Thomas? That might explain the awkward closeness. God, I hope he didn’t think I did anything to keep Chazzer’s heat seeking missile locked on me. Hearing Thomas’s sweet voice, I was awash with relief. I wasn’t going to ask why he was at the coffee shop I cased. I was just thankful he was here.
“Chazzer, right?” Thomas stated confidently. Compared to Arnold Chazzernegger, Thomas was taller, but less dense in the brain and muscle department. I didn’t want him to get pounded and have his beautiful profile ruined. “Phoenix is actually with me, so if you don’t mind, you’re kind of ruining my mojo.”
Chazzer looked from me to Thomas, doubt evident on his broad face. Bret tugged on his friend’s arm again. To send the mess
age home, Thomas leaned in and took my hand in his. His fingers were cool, but comforting. He intertwined his fingers with mine and squeezed, and Chazzer watched intently to see if I would flinch. I didn’t. Bret finally spoke up.
“Sorry, man. My buddy just has a big crush on your girl.” Bret whispered and gave a thumbs up to the cute barista. Chazzer clenched his jaw and looked at Thomas again. His eyes pools of hatred for this beautiful creature by my side. Chazzer nodded his head in defeat and gave me one last pleading look. I took a step back and took comfort in shielding myself behind my hero. I pressed my nose into Thomas’s sleeve, hiding my face. This time, when Bret pulled Chazzer, he followed.
The front door chimed and they were gone. I unwillingly released my hand from Thomas. I smiled like I just won the lottery.
“So, friend, do you come here often?” I asked when I finally caught my breath.
“Oh, it’s my first time. My sister suggested I check it out. And you, friend?” He replied with his killer smile.
“If I told you, I’d have to kill you.” I whispered. He got the inside joke. We ordered together and Thomas insisted on paying. I passed my twenty dollar bill to the handsome olive skin barista—name tag Jonathan—and enjoyed swatting away Thomas’s arm as he tried to pass a credit card to the guy. Thomas held my wrist. His eyes bore into me and I was sure I turned as red as my sweater. Jolly Jonathan must have been a romantic because he giggled at our playfulness, instead of being annoyed.
After getting our beverages, I walked out of the shop and started for my car. Thomas followed closely behind. He suggested we stay and chat and I gave him a knowing look.
“You know I can’t. Bradley’s back and I need to work on a report.” I pointed to my drink. Thomas’s joy evaporated and he played with his cup cozy, peeling the edges off as a distraction. I wanted to fling our drinks down and kiss him, but my head knew that it wasn’t the time.
“Can I at least walk you to your car in case a muscular masseur named Chazzer is hiding in the dumpsters?” I smiled and nodded yes. I wished I parked farther away, and we stood in front of my car too soon. He smiled when he saw the Guam flag hanging from the rear view mirror. Thomas, like a true gentleman, opened my door.
“Please take this drink for your sister.” I said. Thomas’s gentle touch sent waves up my arm where we made contact as he pushed it away. “Really, I’ve had too many today.” And after finding safety in my car pointed to the coffee waiting for me. “I hope she enjoys.”
Thomas crouched down to peer into my car. For a few moments, we just smiled at each other. I reached over to my Guam flag and gingerly removed it from my rearview mirror. I wasn’t sure if the rope would be damaged from being exposed to the sun for the last year. The extraction was a success and it was only a bit faded. I handed it to Thomas. He refused at first, but I insisted. He pointed out his car, a dark blue Prius.
“I can’t take this, Phoenix.” The whisper of my name had my heart quickening.
“The Guam seal will totally match your car.” I said.
“I don’t know if I’ve earned this.”
“The drink or the flag?”
Thomas took a long sip of the strawberry slush tea. “Oh, this delectable drink, I’m taking for sure. I earned this getting the muscle guy off of you.” He smiled, his gorgeous gray eyes disappearing in a jungle of lashes. “But, this flag must be special to you.”
“It’s the least I could do for you, for saving me. And, anyway, I have three more at home, exactly the same, still in the plastic. Really.” I reached for the seal. “Actually, let me give you a new one, not this old thing.” He yanked it away.
“No, I like this one. It’s special.” And used, I thought. “Thank you.” He smiled my smile again. I bid Thomas farewell and he stood tall and asked if he could call me the next day.
I knew Bradley would be back to his office to catch up with his real estate world and I gave Thomas a time frame that he could reach me. I wondered if Jem was in the office now or still in training, but I quickly sucker punched that thought out of my head. I had this beautiful friend in front of me. I put my hands on my car door and rested my chin on them so I could soak up all of Thomas. I enjoyed his face for a few more seconds. The sun shone from behind him and his body shaded me. The rays burst through his wonderfully tousled hair. It took major effort to break eye contact with this god, but I sat up and started my car. Thomas reached out and ran his fingers across mine as my left hand still gripped the door. His index finger seemed to feel the indentation in the pale skin where my wedding ring used to be. An electric shock coursed throughout my body. In a perfect world, I would kiss him passionately. My love life was too messy to drag him into right now. I wanted to keep him untarnished, pristine and mint in the box—on the shelf for now.
“Goodbye, Thomas.” I said breathlessly. The rasp in my voice surprised me.
He hopped back onto the curb to watch me leave. It was nice to see him in attire other than his work uniform. The dark green plaid shirt hung loosely on his frame and he crushed the sleeves up to his elbows. His dark blue jeans hugged his legs. He wore his usual shoes and the gold necklace glinted in the sunlight. His fingers fidgeted with the Guam flag and I finally found the will to drive away from him.
Chapter 9
Man and Ex-Wife
I didn’t head straight home. I wanted some retail therapy so I headed south to an outlet store. It was nearing the middle of the afternoon and I yearned for Rachel to be here to join me in the thrill of the hunt. I blasted the mixed CD and it got me angry about Bradley again. I’m sure that was Rachel’s intention, the gift that keeps on pissing you off.
Two hours later and one hundred dollars lighter, I headed home. Even before I entered the condo, I smelled cedar planked salmon, my favorite and a regular dish in the former Farmer household. I dreaded opening the door. I hoped Bradley didn’t do anything extreme to win me over. It was pointless, I knew—but I guess he didn’t get the memo.
I placed my shopping bags on the couch and tiptoed to the dining room. I may as well see what the evening had in store. Bradley had set out our special plates. Flickering scented candles made me nauseated now, when once it was a welcoming fragrance. Shiny wine glasses were ready to be filled. A salad and three varieties of dressing stood like soldiers on the table. In the middle of the neatly placed dinnerware was a large red gift bag, tissue and all. I took a peek inside and saw not only the Coach wallet that was supposed to be my reward for dropping weight but the matching purse too. Maybe Angelica could use a new designer purse and wallet because I didn’t want his bribe.
“Honey, you’re home.” His pitiful tone was awkward. He sounded like a desperate househusband. I stood at the entryway of our kitchen and my arms crossed automatically.
“Expecting someone? Oh, wait, is Jem coming over, should I leave?” Bradley wore an apron and gloves and was ready to remove the salmon from the oven. It did smell wonderful, but that was beside the point.
“No, just waiting for my wife!” Bradley’s voice boomed. His nervous laughter grated in my ears.
“Oh, really?” I bit my lip, willing myself to stay calm. “I’ll take my dinner to the office. Thanks for cooking.” I turned to walk away, but within a blink of an eye, Bradley had removed his gloves and was by my side.
“Nix, please. I’m trying to salvage our marriage. I know I was a prick, but tell me what I need to do to fix this. To fix us.
I spoke softly without turning to look at him, “You can’t fix this. I can’t fix this. You set the wheels in motion and our marriage is over. And, besides. I’m not broken.”
“Please, no.” He pleaded. “I’ll go to counseling, whatever you want, please, Nix.” How about getting a scarlet A tattooed on your chest. “And, I’m not with Jem anymore. I ended it with her.” For the second time, I thought.
“Did you talk to your parents or what?” I was exhausted from the pendulum of feelings of today, swinging from hate for Bradley to lust for Thomas. I craved normalcy
, but Bradley and me again—that was not normal anymore. I made the fatal error of looking at his face. I surrendered in the name of food and headed to the dining table. I would be civil and give Bradley a sit down dinner with me, his last supper.
I learned that he hadn’t called his family. He barely touched the food he prepared. I wondered if he poisoned it for a second, and sniffed the pink flaky salmon at the end of my fork. I waited until he took a bite, and then ate. I kept conversation to a minimum. I didn’t engage in small talk about Rachel or Uncle Joaquin’s funeral or my job despite the many attempts Bradley made to find out about the new me. I left the gift bag on the table, only acknowledging it with a small shrug.
“With the amount of weight you lost, I figured I owed you more than the wallet.” Bradley stated sounding dumber to me than ever.
I enjoyed every bite of my dinner, and I wanted to take a long hot bath so badly. I even offered to do the dishes to get this supper over with. After my third glass of white wine, I excused myself. Bradley said he had it under control and like a lost child, he watched me head upstairs. Good, let him enjoy the sight of my butt as I walk away. Single Ladies…played in my head.
I rested my head back on a rolled towel. The warm water was beginning to cool when I heard a light tap on the door. “Nix, honey, I know I’m in the dog house, but could I sleep in the bed with you?”
“I’ll take the couch. You take the bed.” I turned up my shower radio and the classical music drowned out the rest of his babble. I felt bad that Bradley did not sleep on a proper bed in awhile, but I wasn’t about to be horizontal with the man. When I opened the bathroom door, Bradley was perched on the bed, waiting and watching for me. When did his eyes get so big? A flash of his sophomore class photo, the one that made me fall for him blazed before my eyes. I blinked twice and looked at the floor. Before he could speak, I grabbed two pillows and my blanket and escaped to my sanctuary.
Secret Shopper Page 11
