Trusting A Texan (Try to Remember)

by Leann Harris

  Quit hiding, a voice in his head scolded him. Go out and face her.

  Taking a deep breath, he stood and walked down the hall. Pausing at the door, he heard a voice singing, “Just you wait, Henry Higgins, just you wait.”

  He smiled. My Fair Lady had been his mother’s favorite movie. He’d forgotten that he’d kept her copy of it.

  “Are you enjoying the movie?” he asked as he walked into the room. April was resting on the couch, her ankle up on the coffee table. He sat down beside her.

  She grinned. “Somehow you don’t look like the kind of guy who likes musicals.”

  “I don’t. That copy was my mother’s. I kept it after she died.”

  April’s smile faded. “Oh, I’m sorry.”

  He looked at the screen. “Mom always liked the Cinderella aspect of this movie. I guess she identified with the heroine.” Feeling awkward, he added, “Why don’t I go get that surprise Mabel sent us? Two pieces of Red Velvet cake.”

  “I could get very spoiled here and not want to go home.” When April realized what she’d said, all color drained from her face.

  Standing, Rafe smiled at her. “I don’t think there’s a chance of that.”

  He walked into the kitchen and set up the coffeemaker, then unwrapped the pieces of cake. Walking back into the room, he handed her a plate, then set the other one on the coffee table. “You have your choice of coffee or a soft drink. What would you like?”

  “Is your coffee half as good as it smells?”

  “Are you kidding? Rangers are known to make the best coffee in west Texas—next to Mabel’s, that is.”

  “Coffee, please.”

  He nodded, walked back into the kitchen and poured two cups of coffee. “You like it black or diluted with cream and sugar?” he asked.

  “Diluted. Cream only,” she answered back.

  He fished out the coffee creamer and stirred in a big spoonful. “You’re making progress, April,” he called out. “Remembering how you like your coffee is a step forward.”

  She was smiling when he came back into the room. “It is.”

  “Your guard was down, and your preference slipped out. It’s a good sign.”

  They ate in companionable silence and watched the movie. Rafe’s feelings grew more raw as the movie progressed. Seeing it made him relive the last time he’d watched it with his mother.

  “Would you tell me about your mom?” April whispered when the movie ended.

  The request surprised him, and at first he didn’t want to talk about it. Then he noticed the longing in her eyes. It occurred to him that April at this moment didn’t have a past of her own, so it was natural that she wanted something to fill that void.

  “What can I say? Since you met my half sister, it’s obvious that my mother wasn’t with my dad for long. They were young, in love, and not married.” He shook his head, wondering how that brief, intense time could’ve lasted her a lifetime. “Before my mom could tell my dad she was pregnant, he’d left the Valley and gone to Midland to see if he could make money in the oil fields there. He was a wildcatter and on his first well he was running out of money. So when the daughter of a local banker became interested in him, he married her and obtained the loan he needed to strike it big with his well.”

  April reached out and touched his hand. He tried to smile at her, but the memories kept pulling him back into the bitterness of the past.

  “Why didn’t your mom try to contact your dad?”

  He shrugged. “In her things, I found the announcement for George’s first marriage. Obviously, Mother knew about his marriage. George later told me that he saw Mom a couple of years after he married the first time. My guess is that George came looking for sympathy from his old flame and maybe something more. But he didn’t get it. My mother wasn’t going to allow him back into her life. And she didn’t tell him about me.

  “Mom was shunned by her family for having a baby out of wedlock. It shamed them. I don’t think the situation would’ve been so bad if it hadn’t been obvious that I was half Anglo. A mistake could be forgiven, but what she did was an anathema.”

  Rafe stood up and walked to the bank of windows that overlooked his front yard. “But my mother was a determined woman. Her aunt never turned her back on her, and helped mom through court reporting school. Mom graduated first in her class and found a job right away. She worked herself into a top position within the county courts. Unfortunately, she never reconciled with her parents. Her brothers and sisters eventually invited her to family functions, but her father never spoke to her again for causing the family shame.”

  Running his hand through his hair, he turned and faced April. From her expression, it was obvious that she felt the emotions the story had caused him. But he wanted her to know the one bright point in the story.

  “When I became a Ranger, my mother said if she had it all to do over again, she’d do it again in a heartbeat. She’d loved my dad, and I was...the joy of her life.” Suddenly, he was chagrined that he had let that last bit of information slip.

  When he looked into April’s eyes, there were tears there. And understanding—a sentiment that his ex-wife had never given him.

  “Thank you for telling me.”

  He was in dangerous, uncharted waters here. He needed to get away. “I’d better go out and finish riding the last section of land to see if I have any cows caught in the flash flood. I also need to keep an eye out for your car. Why don’t you watch another tape. I shouldn’t be more than a couple of hours.”

  “Okay.” She sounded lost and alone.

  He cursed silently, but knew he needed to get out there.

  As he rode from the house, he had the oddest feeling that he was running away from something—something he didn’t want to face.

  Chapter 4

  April went through Rafe’s videotapes once more. She wasn’t in the mood for a war movie. Somehow death and destruction didn’t appeal to her at the moment. She switched off the VCR and silence descended, wrapping around her, leaving her feeling lost and alone. Who was she and where had she come from?

  No answers appeared.

  Instead of facing those stark, unanswered questions, April glanced around the neat room, trying to concentrate on Rafe. For a single man living by himself, he seemed very neat. Nothing was out of place. The furniture was dusty, but the house seemed orderly—which, oddly enough, set her teeth on edge. Rafe’s clothes and boots weren’t lying around. There weren’t any dirty dishes on the end tables or even in the kitchen sink. And that made April uneasy.

  Her curiosity driving her, April walked down the hall and stopped in the open doorway of Rafe’s office. The room was excessively neat. Nothing was out of place in the well-used room. Papers were neatly stacked in the trays on his desk. There was even a stack of papers on the blotter, but they were lined up and neat.

  A shiver passed over her skin.

  She hobbled further down the hall. At the end was a large bedroom with massive pieces of furniture. She peeked inside. Again, orderly. There was nothing out of place. There were no clothes or shoes scattered across the floor. Again, his neatness made her restless, but she didn’t understand why.

  Turning, she walked back into the living room. The quiet of the room pressed down on her, increasing her nervousness. She walked over to the window and looked out at the distant mountains.

  How had she ended up on Rafe’s land? That was a question that held both a promise and a threat.

  Not wanting to think about it anymore, she moved into the kitchen. She needed to do something—an activity that would take her mind off her unsolved questions. She decided to make dinner. Opening the refrigerator, she saw a package of chili meat. She opened several cabinets and was amazed at the unorganized way that Rafe had put his dishes and canned goods on the shelves. It was a disaster—there was no organized pattern to the contents and April found comfort in the disorganization.

  Rafe was human, after all. A smile tickled her lips.

&nbs
p; She searched several cabinets until she found cans of green chilies and pinto beans. Pulling out a frying pan, she began to fry the meat Maybe if she kept herself busy making dinner, she wouldn’t worry about her situation.

  She could only pray.

  Rafe surveyed the area where he had found April. There were fresh signs of the flash flood, but if the water had washed her car away, he couldn’t find any sign of it.

  He took a deep breath, inhaling the sweet smell of washed earth. He needed to concentrate on what to do next, instead of remembering how lost and alone April had looked when he walked out the back door. But he’d had no choice in the matter, he kept telling himself.

  Suddenly, his horse’s head came up and the ears came forward.

  “What is it Sam?” Rafe asked.

  The sound of an engine pierced the air. Rafe looked down the county road and saw the sheriffs car come to a stop. Derek climbed out.

  “How’s it going, Rafe?” Derek asked.

  “This is where I found April. But I don’t see any signs of her car. Have you spotted it?”

  Derek shook his head. “No. Of course there are hundreds of places it could be out here.”

  “I’ll call in the highway patrol helicopters to search this area. I’ll contact them when I get back to the ranch. Did you check on the wanted list for someone resembling April?”

  “There was nothing on the state. Nothing on the national, either.”

  Rafe rubbed the back of his neck, trying to put his finger on the sense of disquiet hammering him. “We’ll need to keep a close watch on the missing persons list. It’s early, yet.” He was making up excuses. “I expect within the next twelve hours someone will report her missing.”

  “Did you call your neighbors?”

  “Sure did. No one was expecting a guest.” He rolled his shoulders, trying to work out the knot in his neck.

  “What’s bothering you, Rafe?”

  Shaking his head, Rafe said, “Am I that obvious?”

  “Only to those of us who know you.”

  “That gut feeling about trouble following April is still there. I don’t know how or what, but something’s going to show up.”

  “Well, all we can do is watch and wait.”

  “And that’s what frustrates me the most. Feeling something’s out of kilter, and not knowing what it is.”

  “Look at it this way, Rafe. The best lawmen have that sixth sense. You’re in a select group.”

  “And you’re telling me you didn’t know when Alex was in trouble at Simon Moore’s ranch?” Rafe said, referring to the time his sister was in danger from a major drug dealer.

  “Hey, we all get them. I’ll trust your instincts on this one, Rafe.” He got back into his cruiser and drove off.

  Rafe mounted his horse and started back to the ranch. By the time he approached the ranch house, he’d managed to pull one cow out of a mud hole and return a lost calf to the main herd and its anxious mother. But his added mission—to find a clue to April’s identity—had been a complete wash. And his talk with Derek hadn’t led to any new information.

  Dismounting, he hurriedly took care of his horse and strode to the house. The smell that greeted him when he opened the door shocked him, hurtling him back over the years to when his mother cooked for him.

  Chili.

  A shaft of loneliness pierced Rafe’s heart, but he refused to give in to the feelings. Another odd and equally shattering thought popped into his head—a wife, preparing dinner for her husband.

  He stopped that idea cold. No sir. He’d traveled that road before, and he hadn’t fared well.

  Hanging his hat by the back door, he was drawn by the smell of honest-to-goodness green chili—not the stuff out of a can—to the stove.

  Glancing over her shoulder, April gave him a full smile that sent a jolt of electricity through his body, pooling in the part of his anatomy that had been unruly since April appeared this morning. It had nothing to do with food, but everything to do with hunger. Her crutches were resting on the counter next to her.

  “What are you doing?” His voice sounded rough as he struggled with his desires.

  April’s smile faded and her eyes grew haunted. “Cooking.”

  Rafe felt two inches tall. It wasn’t April’s fault that he found her attractive. She’d done nothing but. be herself. “What I meant was, why are you up on your feet?”

  The question didn’t ease the worry in her eyes. “I needed something to do besides wondering who I was.”

  “Didn’t you want to watch a movie?”

  “I didn’t want to see any war movies. They tend not to brighten a person’s mood.”

  He couldn’t blame her. “It smells delicious,” he commented, trying to ease her strained expression.

  “You like chili?” she asked softly.

  He grinned. “Does a Texan brag? Of course I love it.” He peered over her shoulder at the frying pan.

  Seeing the direction of his gaze, she said, “I saw the meat in the refrigerator, and I thought—” she shrugged her shoulders “—you might like some homemade chili.”

  He cocked his head. “You’re a mind reader. I like my chili cooked from scratch with green chilies. It reminds me of the way my mother made it. How did you learn to do that?”

  Her gaze flew to his. Surprise colored her green eyes—eyes the color of the first grass of spring. Irritated with himself, Rafe turned toward the cabinets to get a coffee cup.

  “I don’t know. I just started cooking to keep myself busy.” She gave him a wobbly smile. “Your selection of tapes was rather...uh...limited.”

  “Hey, I’m a bachelor. What did you expect?”

  She shrugged.

  “If that chili tastes half as good as it smells, I’m in for a real treat. Not many people make it from scratch that way. Most folks cook the mild red stuff, or open a can. How did you learn to make it?” he asked again, hoping that if she remembered how to cook, maybe she’d remember how she learned to cook.

  “I—” She looked down at the pan and her brow wrinkled. “I don’t know.”

  “Don’t worry. I’m thankful you made it. You’d think I’d learn to cook just out of self-defense.”

  “Then why’d you have that chili meat in your refrigerator if you don’t cook?”

  How could he explain the yearning that had possessed him to buy that meat. “I had a hankering.”

  “You don’t look like you’re starving.” Her gaze moved slowly over his body and he felt each tense muscle as her eyes caressed him. It was becoming increasingly clear that he was headed for trouble if he couldn’t keep his mind on solving the mystery of April’s identity. Maybe he needed to call one of his neighbors.

  “I eat at Mabel’s a lot.” He turned to the bread box and pulled out a bag of tortillas.

  “In addition to the pinto beans, I made a couple of salads.” She nodded toward the refrigerator. “They’re in there.”

  “I’m surprised that the lettuce was still good,” he said, laughing. He took the bowls out and set them on the table. Rafe finished setting the table, adding a couple of cans of soda to the mix. He then carried the skillet to the table, April hobbling after him.

  Rafe dished out the chili, then tore off a couple of pieces of tortilla and scooped up a piece of meat. The spicy flavor brought back a dozen different memories.

  “How is it?” she asked.

  “You’ve got a talent there, April. I think you could give Mabel some competition.”

  She smiled gratefully, then tasted her creation. “It’s not bad.

  “Did you find any signs of my car?” she asked, spearing a tomato.

  “Nope. I checked the area where I found you. There wasn’t anything. Derek drove by and he hadn’t found anything, either. But there are a lot of arroyos in the area—places where we wouldn’t notice a car. I’ll calls the DPS office in Marfa and see if I can get one of the surveillance helicopters to fly over this area. They can cover more ground than I can on horse
back. If they spot something, then we can go out and get the tag number and identify you that way.”

  “Oh.” She couldn’t help the note of desolation in her voice. Why couldn’t the answers be easier?

  He smiled warmly, making her pulse speed up.

  “You’re worrying too much. Don’t push it.”

  She looked down at her hands, and it felt like she’d swallowed a dozen butterflies. When her gaze lifted again, it locked with Rafe’s, and those butterflies went wild. She should be frightened of being alone with this stranger. What did she know of him? AU she knew was that he was a Texas Ranger. And that he was neat.

  “I was impressed by how neat you keep your house,” April said.

  Surprise crossed his face. “My mother worked. It made her life easier if I picked up after myself.” He shrugged. “I guess I just never got out of the habit.”

  And with those words, her discomfort with his neatness slipped away. She stood and picked up her plate.

  “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “I’m gathering the dishes.”

  “Since you cooked, I’ll clean. Besides, you’ve been up on that foot too long. You go rest.”

  If he’d said he wanted to have sex with her, here in the middle of the kitchen, she couldn’t have been more surprised.

  “Ah—”

  “Close your mouth, April. My offer isn’t so surprising, especially in this day and age.”

  He was right. Surprisingly enough, she understood about the changing role of men and women today. If she remembered that unimportant data, why couldn’t she remember who she was?

  “Why don’t you go turn on the TV? The local news should be coming on.”

  “Local?” Her brow wrinkled in a frown. Surely he didn’t mean Saddle.

  “Midland,” he supplied. “They might have something about you. It’s a chance.”

  She moved slowly to the television and turned it on. As she watched the commentator on the screen, she heard Rafe in the kitchen. When the newscast moved into the weather for tomorrow, April didn’t know whether to feel relieved that news of an escaped convict—her—hadn’ t been there, or disappointed that no one had missed her enough to report her gone.