by Mj Fields
���Really friend?��� she said laughing.
���Boy shorts Tessa, that is so hot, with matching bras front clasp no less,��� Lucas smiled, ���Very naughty.���
���Who were you fighting with on the phone?��� She pulled out onto the road.
���Her.���
���Oh, yes her,��� Tessa said making a terrified face. ���Sometimes I forget.���
���Those are the times you smile,��� Lucas said deep in thought.
���Not happy that I took your vehicle?���
���No, happy isn���t the word I would use to describe it, but it���s none of her business,��� Lucas said trying to convince them both.
She reached over and squeezed his hand, ���It���s going to be okay, Lucas. You���ve got this.���
He took a deep breath.
* * *
Tessa woke up crying again that night. It was the same dream and he was in her room again. Lucas held her and lay with her till she fell asleep. He gently kissed her lips as she lay sleeping in his arms. She whimpered his name a few times and each time he kissed her she smiled and fell back to sleep. She woke in his arms again and watched him sleep. When he woke up, she had on black boy shorts and was clasping the matching black lace bra.
���That���s one heck of a sight to wake up to,��� Lucas said, smiling. She jumped and turned around bending to pull up her skirt. ���That���s just as good,��� he said, standing up.
���Sorry, I didn���t want to wake you. I don���t think I���ve let you get much sleep lately,��� Tessa said.
���Please, don���t apologize. I wish I could wake up to that every day of my life,��� he smiled and added, ���friend.���
His hair was messy and his perfectly ripped upper body was bare. Me too, she thought She pulled him up and hugged him. ���Oh,��� she gasped, when she felt his erection. ���You had better go… I don���t know, take care of that before anyone wakes up,��� she said, rushing him out the door.
Within minutes, John was turning off her alarm. ���Oops,��� John said as he walked down the stairs, ���must have forgotten that one to turn it on.���
Tessa and Lucas opened the doors at the same time and they both smiled having heard John think he made a mistake.
���Tessa,��� Kendall said.
���I���m sorry. Did I wake you?��� She quickly turned and walked towards
���Yes. If he���s going to come in here every night, maybe you should wear more pajamas��� Kendall said.
���I���m so sorry, Kendall. It won���t happen again.���
���It���s okay. I won���t tell. He makes you stop crying. He���s not doing anything wrong. But you need to wear more pajamas, okay?���
���Okay, Kendall,��� Tessa said. ���Go back to sleep. You have another hour.���
She walked out and Lucas stood in the hallway, looking at her.
���Thank you,��� she said.
He hugged her and kissed her head. ���I wouldn���t want to be anywhere else.���
They walked downstairs, she went in the kitchen and he went in the bathroom. She put cinnamon rolls in the oven and he walked out.
���Can I hug you?���
She smiled and hugged him, ���I think after the game Friday night we should invite some people up to camp,��� Alex walked in and she let go of Lucas, ���What do you think Alex?���
���Sounds like a plan,��� Alex yawned.
* * *
Tessa, Jade and Phoebe rode with her parents and siblings to the game. They walked in just as the game was about to start. The other team was big; they looked like college athletes. Tessa whistled loudly, and Alex waved from the field. He elbowed Lucas, and he smiled up at her. Tessa blew them kisses. Lucas���s Dad, Audrianna, and the girls sat behind them. The girls jumped on Tessa���s lap.
Tessa hugged them. ���Hello princesses.���
Lucas smiled and waved to them.
���How are you doing, Tessa?��� Audri asked.
���I���m good. How are you?���
���I���m actually kind of wonderful,��� she smiled. ���Thanks to you, I think Lucas gave me some great advice, so thank you.���
Landon walked in with his arms full of food and little pom- poms for the girls. ���Hello, Tessa.��� He smiled, ���What happened to your head?���
���Championship field hockey game,��� Tessa smiled.
���Did you win?���
���Yes,��� Tessa said.
���Way to go,��� Landon said, patting her on the shoulder. ���Lucas and Audrianna tell me that you were pretty pissed off at my son the last time we met. I would have never known. Why did you act like nothing was bothering you?���
���I wanted him to win, and apparently I���m a good actress,��� Tessa said.
���Are you acting now, with everything that has come to light?���
���No, Mr. Links. I know your son is a great guy, and forgive me if I sound, well, my age, but I love him and want what���s best for him regardless of what is happening. We are friends, and I hope we always will be,��� Tessa looked at him.
���That isn���t typical of your age Tessa ��� and thank you.��� Landon leaned forward and hugged her.
* * *
The game started out fiercely. Lucas was sacked for the first time all season. The opposing team knew they were big on passing and blocked almost every chance they had. Lucas threw a forty- yard yard pass to Tommy, and he made the first touchdown of the game. He held up his J and Jade smiled. They were tied at half time. Landon got up and walked toward a row of what looked like college scouts and shook their hands. Lucas passed the ball at the fifty yard line at the beginning of the second half. It was intercepted by number 72 from the opposing team. He ran fast down the field and passed everyone; Lucas ran after him and tackled him at the ten yard line. The ball was loose and Lucas recovered it. Tessa jumped up with the rest of the crowd and cheered. The game ended with the boys in blue ahead by seven.
Tessa ran to Alex and hugged him. Lucas beamed as he looked at her. She hugged him next, and he spun her around.
���Amazing job, rock star,��� she said. He kissed her on the mouth then put her down turning towards his father and gave him a hug.
Sadi walked up and kissed Lucas on the cheek. ���Good job.���
���Thanks,��� he said, looking past her.
Lucas walked up to the boys and they all hugged.
Number 72 ran up to them. ���Good game, guys.���
He looked at Tessa. ���Your boyfriend kicked my ass out there today, Ross.���
���He���s not her boyfriend,��� Sadi said loudly.
He smiled and winked. ���Good to know. See you in two weeks, Tess.���
���So did you tell her yet?��� Sadi asked Lucas.
���Sadi, of course he told me; we are friends, remember?��� Tessa said.
���So he told you we fucked less than a week ago?��� Sadi asked.
Tessa kept walking. She didn���t want to play Sadi���s game anymore.
* * *
She walked up to her dad who was standing next to number 72 and a man she thought she recognized.
���Hey Tessa, do you remember Ben?��� John asked.
���No, sorry, I don���t,��� Tessa smiled.
���His dad comes up every year for a week and hunts with us. Ben is coming
up this year, too,��� John announced.
She smiled. ���Cool.���
Ben put his arm around her shoulder. ���Tess, you���re breaking my heart. How could you forget me?��� Ben said, laughing. ���We use to shoot bow and arrow together.���
���Benji?��� Smiling, she turned and hugged him. ���I used to kick your butt. I hope you���ve gotten better.���
���We���ll see. Damn, you���ve changed,��� he said.
She laughed.
���No boyfriend, Ross?��� Ben asked.
���Nope.���
���Great, then you���re going to have to let me take you out some night,��� Ben said. ���Is it a date?���
���I guess it all depends on how well you shoot. I certainly couldn���t go out with someone whose butt I can kick. And you���re going to have to redeem yourself after that play,��� Tessa said. They both laughed.
Lucas walked up to them. ���Lucas, this is Ben.���
���Hey, Lucas,��� Ben put his hand out and Lucas shook it. ���Tess didn���t remember me; our fathers went to college together. They hunt together every year, and Tess here,��� Ben said putting his arm around her, ���used to kick my ass when we shot bow. Do you hunt?���
���I will be this year,��� Lucas smiled.
���Great then I���ll see you both in a week. Tess, you denied me as your friend on Facebook ��� ouch,��� he said and kissed Tessa���s hand and walked away.
���I got you and Alex something, so when you get back, check in your glove box. I���ll be setting up at camp.��� Tessa smiled. ���See you then.���
* * *
The girls had invited a few friends, and the boys pulled in and walked down to camp. Tessa had made cupcakes and the girls had decorated them with their jersey numbers and school colors. Tessa wrote ROCKSTAR on the one she made for Lucas.
Lucas was quiet when he came in.
���Cheer up, buttercup,��� Tessa said, as she walked by and elbowed him.
���We need to talk,��� he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her behind him outside. ���First of all, I love the necklace.��� He pulled it out from inside his jacket. ���Thank you. But Tessa, I know you���re pissed about what Sadi said at the game, so please let me explain.���
Tessa looked at him and acted confused, ���Oh,��� she gasped as she searched his guilt- ridden face. ���Oh Lucas, you slept with her last week? When? Why?���
He told her what happened, every detail. When she was able to breathe again, she forced a smile on her face.
���Okay, then.��� She turned to walk away.
���Tessa, wait,��� he said.
She turned to look up at him.
���Lucas, I am not sure what you want me to say. Should I congratulate you on your ability to get high? Or the way women throw themselves at you, although I would hardly call that a woman? Or maybe I should congratulate you on your problem controlling this?��� She reached down and grabbed him while she stared into his eyes. She let go. ���You have a problem ��� a couple of them actually. But I���m not yours, and you are absolutely not mine.��� She turned to leave.
Lucas grabbed her arm. She pulled it away. ���Tessa, I love you. I���m sorry.���
���I still want you to be okay. I care deeply for you, and I will pray, Lucas, that someday you can see how wrong you are about your feelings for me if you could do that. Our friendship was never a friendship, because I loved you so much more, no matter the hurt it caused me.��� The pain in her eyes was almost more than he could bear. ���But that���s where I was wrong. I said one thing and wanted something else desperately. I was hurt then, now I feel betrayed.���
���I have never lied to you, Tessa.���
���I suppose not. How very noble of you.��� Tessa walked inside.
Tessa walked up to Jade. ���Tell Tommy that Lucas needs a friend right now,��� Tessa said, clearing her throat and taking a deep breath. ���And Jade, right now I need to fall apart, so can you come to the pond after you see that Tommy takes care of Lucas?���
CHAPTER TWENTY THREE
The next week went by slowly. Each day the same, Tessa would wake and get breakfast ready and Lucas would always thank her. She felt numb, she would come home after school and do her homework and chores and fix dinner. Tessa got the lead role in the play Evita and her practice ran from six at night until nine.
Lucas and Alex had basketball practice after school and he was home by five. Lucas would do whatever he could to be in her presence and appear busy. When she left for practice he and Alex would shoot hoops or guns until she came home.
Tessa never told anyone about Sadi and Lucas���s last night together. Jade and Tommy knew of course. She needed him to be alright, she knew she couldn���t be that for him anymore. Tessa would smile and make small talk and joke when other people were around but when Lucas was alone with her she avoided him completely. They worked together on Saturdays at the Spot without many words exchanged. Tessa was secretly in agony and Lucas missed her more and more everyday as he watched the only girl he ever loved quickly slipping away from him.
* * *
Tessa went up to Camp to clean for the big opening weekend celebration. She was surprised to see Lucas on the counter, cleaning the windows. He turned when he heard her come in and jumped down.
���Hey, Tessa, did you come to help?���
He had the fire going and it���s hot in here, which must be why his shirt was off, she thought.
Tessa forced a smile. ���Yep, I do this every year.���
���I know, Alex told me. I just thought I could get it done so you didn���t have to,��� he said. ���You do everything at the house. I thought I should pitch in since you have to deal with my sorry ass for the next two months.���
Tessa saw the black frame around the Doe Camp sign that was now hanging above the fireplace. ���You like it?��� He was leaning on the counter and crossing his arms in front of him. ���I thought it deserved a frame.���
���Looks good.��� She unpacked the bags of products and supplies she���d brought with her.
He reached over and grabbed a bottle of Clorox. She bumped into him and froze. She looked up at him and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. He smelled good, as he always did.
His hands were in the air and his eyes were closed. He was taking deep breaths. He opened his eyes and looked down into hers. They stared at each other for a long time. He swallowed hard.
���Tessa, I can���t move right now, so you���re going to have to,��� Lucas said in a whisper.
Tessa ducked under his arm and walked outside to grab the groceries out of the truck. When she came back, he was gone. She opened the back door to shake out a rug and saw him crouched down, hugging his knees. She walked past him and shook the rug. When she turned back around, she saw that his eyes were filled with tears. He clenched his jaw shook his head. She couldn���t look away. Her eyes filled and she dropped to her knees in front of him and began wiping his falling tears with her sleeve.
���I���m so sorry Tessa,��� he said taking deep breaths.
���Lucas,��� she whispered ���please don���t cry.���
���Tessa, I have never felt this sort of pain. I feel like my heart is literally breaking into pieces and then I see you and feel the hate you have for me. I can���t even give you the space you deserve. I fucked up, I am so sorry,��� she hugged him, ���Tessa don���t.���
She didn���t let go. He finally
relaxed and wrapped his arms around her.
���I don���t hate you Lucas,��� Tessa whispered.
She wanted to tell him she loved him and that she and he could work through this, that she would help him raise his child and they would get married one day and live happily ever after.
���I want to be your friend, it���s just going to take some time, sorry.���
���You have nothing to be sorry for Tessa.���
���Okay, you���re right. I am perfect. You are lucky to have me as a friend.��� Tessa forced a laugh. ���But Lucas, I���m lucky to have you too,��� she stood up, ���because without you it would take me all day to get this place clean.���
She grabbed both his hands and pulled him up; she wiped his face with her sleeves and stared into his beautiful green eyes.
���Now would you please put a shirt on?��� Tessa asked. She turned and walked into camp.
He knew she still loved him and selfishly, for now that was enough.
Tessa popped her headphones on and was cleaning when Lucas tapped her on the shoulder. She jumped.
���Share your music?��� He asked holding up his portable speaker.
���Sure.��� Tessa handed it to him.
Lucas turned it on and looked at her playlist, he laughed.
���What���s so funny?���
���You, TT. Your playlist. I���m just not sure which one to choose from; it���s either get pumped, dance your ass off, goodnight tunes, or,��� he scrolled down, ���fuck off LL.���
���I was mad.���
���Can we listen to that one?��� Lucas laughed.
���Sure. Maybe you���re not even LL,��� Tessa said, looking at him with both eyebrows raised.
���Yeah, ok.���
He flipped through the play list while she continued to clean. He added three songs from his iTunes account and pressed play.
