Miles Apart (The Not So Bad Boys of Rock Book 2)

by Rhonda James

  Once we were seated, and our food was ordered, I leaned back in my chair and awaited the inevitable inquisition. After we had stared at one another for an indeterminable amount of time, I finally cracked.

  “Just ask me already!” I growled.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Come on Travis, I know why we’re here. I know you are all worried about me. I’ll tell you just like I’ve told everyone else, I am fine.” I exhaled loudly, leaning back in my chair.

  “I know you are. If you say you’re fine, then you’re fine. How’s Brooke doing with all this?” He was giving me the big brother stare, you know, the one that penetrates right through you and sees everything. I suddenly found myself feeling very exposed.

  “Okay, I guess. We had a good talk the other night about where we stand. She seems to feel that I have trust issues with her now.”

  “And how did you handle that accusation?” His voice was calm, and somewhat soothing.

  “I told her the truth, that I do trust her.” His eyebrows raised a notch. “What? I do trust her, Travis. Just because I am a bit guarded doesn’t mean I don’t completely trust her. I just have a lot at stake here. I’ve given her everything. Without her around I am basically a shell of a man. I want her here with me. I’m tired of being apart. I want to marry her, settle down, maybe start a family. I want it all.” I raised my eyes to meet his and waited for him to respond.

  “Have you discussed this dream with her? How does she feel about all of it?”

  “I haven’t actually asked her. The night of my birthday I told her I was planning to propose. Then when we first talked again, after we’d left for the tour, I said those words again. But to say that I have actually proposed, then the answer is no.” I took a deep breath and blew it out my nose.

  “What’s stopping you from asking?” Even as the words left his mouth I knew he already knew the answer to that question.

  “Because I’m afraid she’ll say no.” I answered, honestly. “She’ll think I’m only asking her to get her to leave her job in London and be with me.”

  “Would that be true? I mean, I’m sure that would be a bonus but would that be the only reason you would ask her now?”

  “No.” I stated, emphatically. “Sure, that would be awesome to have her with me everyday. I won’t lie. I’m going crazy not having her around. I miss holding her, waking up with her.”

  “Falling asleep with her in your arms after being intimate.” His voice was soft and shaky, almost as if he knew how I was feeling. Then it suddenly hit me.

  “Oh man, I’m such a selfish asshole. Why do you always allow me to go on like that, knowing you feel the same way. Man, Trav, you’re going through the same thing. I’m sure it’s got to be harder on you. You left a wife and a little girl at home.” I hung my head in shame.

  “Nah, man, it’s okay.” He reached an arm over and squeezed my shoulder. “Nat and I have done this enough times that we know how to get through the separation. It doesn’t make it any easier, but she knows that at the end of the day she comes first. I’d walk away from all of this tomorrow if she asked me to. But I know Natalie, and she would never do that. Having her know that I would do that gave her a peace that makes all this possible. There will come a day when I’ll call it quits. I’m sure of it. Until then, we just take it one day at a time. I call every night and tell her that I love them both so very much. Sometimes I even sing Nat to sleep. It’s the only comfort I can offer when I am this far away, but I do it because she needs it, and frankly I need it too.”

  “I used to sing to Brooke. Now I can’t remember the last time I did. I guess if I think hard about it I could say it was probably right after we’d moved her from Ann Arbor.” I smiled, remembering how playful we had been and the pillow fight she’d had with Jade. That night we’d shared a romantic evening on the beach.

  “You should do it again. Remind her why it is that she loves you so much.” He winked.

  Brooke~

  “Have you been online today?” Jade’s voice bristled. I had just settled in for the night. I’d pulled on my PJ’s and crawled beneath the warm comforter, pulling my iPad out to do a bit of reading before falling asleep.

  “No,” I replied, scowling at the urgency in her voice. “Why?”

  “I think you need to see this. Get online and search your man’s name, you’ll know it when you see it.” I tapped out Sebastian’s name in the search bar and a barrage of sites popped up, but one in particular instantly caught my eye. I clicked on the photo and a large image of Sebastian and Dek at a bar with two young women suddenly appeared on the screen. The caption read, “Paradox singer, Sebastian Miles, and guitarist, James Dekker, spotted in Interlaken bar with locals.” Jade remained silent as I kept reading. The brief article went on to question the current state of Sebastian’s relationship with me, even mentioning me by name, and hinted that the foursome went on to spend the entire evening together. There was an old photo of the two of us, taken as we left Nikki’s wedding. What an amazing night that had been, and it felt like such a long time ago. I scrolled back up to take another look at the photo. The brunette was practically sitting in his lap, her breasts resting against his chest, and his left arm was wrapped around her shoulder. He was smiling, not appearing the least bit uncomfortable. Certainly not looking like the lonely, love-sick boyfriend he claimed to be.

  “Wow.” It was the only word I could form at the moment. My body began to feel warm as anger spread through me.

  “Sorry, I hated to do this but I didn’t want people coming up to you and asking you about it.” She stated, her voice full of sorrow.

  “Maybe no one will pay it any attention.” I offered, hopefully.

  “Sweetie, it’s called the World Wide Web for a reason. Believe me, people have seen it.” She sighed, deeply. “The article doesn’t say much about Dek. Did you get a look at the women they were with? I mean, come on. If they wanted to replace us they could do so much better.” She offered a small laugh, not fooling me for one second.

  “I don’t know, maybe Sebastian prefers brunettes, after all Charlotte was a brunette.” Just then my phone buzzed, alerting me that I had another call. I checked it quickly, speak of the devil. “Hey Jade, I have to take this call, it’s Sebastian.”

  “Shit. Call me after you hang up.” She clicked off and I slowly took the other call.

  “Babe, I am so sorry.” Were the first words out of his mouth. I just sat there, breathing. “Brooke? I know you’re there. Listen, I can explain.”

  “I’m sure you can. It seems we both have a lot of explanations to offer lately. The truth is, I’m not even sure I want to hear it anymore. I saw the photo, and read the article. That girl was all over you, and you were enjoying it!” I huffed.

  He sighed heavily before speaking softly. “That’s not how it was at all. Will you let me tell you what really happened? The truth.”

  “Yes.” I answered, calmly, no longer wishing to fight.

  “Well, Dek and I had gone skydiving, you know, the trip you and I were supposed to take. Then we wanted to grab a bite to eat…” He went on to describe how the evening had actually gone. When he was finished I sat there quietly.

  “Do you believe me?” He whispered.

  “I do.” I felt a tugging on my heart as I recalled standing in front of the church, at Nikki’s wedding, and watching as Sebastian mouthed those same words to me during the ceremony. Sebastian was quiet for a few moments, all I heard was the sound of him breathing. “Sebastian, are you alright?”

  “Yeah, sorry. It’s just, hearing you say those words kind of hit me in the heart. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about our future. One day I would love to hear you say those words to me.”

  “You would?” I smiled, longing to hear him say the words. He had told me a few times that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, but he’d never actually proposed.

  “Yeah, definitely.” He answered, his deep voice sounding sexier th
an ever, and all the nerve endings in my body began to tingle.

  “Well, I…I’m speechless. I love you.”

  “And I love you. Hey, can I do something for you?”

  “Sure. What is it?”

  “Can I sing you to sleep? You know, for old times sake.” He sounded nervous as he asked me that question. I smiled at the memory of him singing to me when we’d first started dating.

  “I would like that very much.” I yawned and then settled back onto the pillow.

  “Now bear with me, this is a new song that I wrote right after you left. It’s not my usual style of music but I was in a bad place. Be nice, okay.” He chuckled, softly.

  There’s a picture of you, still hanging on the wall

  I sit home every evening, just hoping you might call.

  My world came closing in on me, the day you said goodbye

  I thought I would get over you, but all I do is cry.

  Come back to me, I’m begging you darlin’

  Come back to me, so I can hold you one more time.

  Don’t leave me hanging, I can’t face the world without you

  Come back to me, I’ll love you right this time.

  Ev’ry day you’re not here, reminds me of all I’ve lost

  Do whatever it takes to win you back, not caring ‘bout the cost.

  Give anything to have you here, and hold you all night long

  Fight like hell to stop the tears, but I’m just not that strong.

  Come back to me, I’m begging you darlin’

  Come back to me, I’ll believe in you this time.

  The bed’s too big without you, don’t leave me alone tonight

  Come back to me, I’ll make everything alright.

  Come back to me, I’ll make everything alright.

  My heart was so full of love as he poured out his soul to me, showing me how vulnerable he had been. Knowing that I had caused that pain was one thing. Hearing the words he’d put together to express that pain was another thing altogether.

  “You’re awfully quiet over there. Did you hate it or just fall asleep on me?” He asked, nervously.

  “I loved it. I loved the song and the man that wrote it. I just hate that I caused you that much pain. I love you Sebastian. I love you now, and I will love you until the day that I die. Thank you.”

  “No, honey. Thank you.”

  “Me? What did I do that you are thanking me for?”

  “Everything. You do, and you are, everything. All that I am, everything good in my life, it’s all because of you. I love you, baby. Now, go to bed.”

  “Goodnight Sebastian.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Sebastian~

  The next week flew by, thankfully, and each day brought me closer to Brooke. Tomorrow we would leave Amsterdam and head to London. I’d told Brooke that we would be arriving late tomorrow night and that I’d meet her at her apartment bright and early the next morning. We had plans to spend the next week locked away, with the exception of rehearsals and the concerts. After singing to her, and baring my soul completely, all I could think about was holding her in my arms.

  At seven o’clock Chris rapped on my door, as only Chris could do. Not one to simply knock, Chris drummed out a beat on the metal door that could easily have been mistaken for a drum solo, and I almost felt compelled to ask him if he was vying for Trav's position in the band.

  “Yo! Hipster King. Let’s roll!” I pulled open the door, shaking my head at the ridiculous nickname they had labeled me with many years ago during a rather questionable fashion stage I’d gone through.

  “Yeah, yeah. I’m here. You ready brother?” I slung my arm around his broad shoulder. I loved this guy.

  “Let’s do this.” He called out, pumping his fist in the air for good measure.

  Our sound check had gone smoothly, and by the time the warm-up band had finished their six-song set I was pumped and ready to take the stage. We made our way around backstage, giving one another a fist-bump for good luck. Chris bounded up the stairs first, taking his spot in front of Trav's drum kit. Dek followed closely behind, making his way across the stage to where his favorite electric guitar sat waiting. There were four lined up behind him, each one used for a specific song. Dek loved his guitars. Travis turned to me, giving me a one-armed hug and a rough pat on the back. I gave a chin tip, and that gesture said it all. It basically said ‘Thanks man, I love you.’ We joined the guys on stage, rounding out the set, and the crowd went wild.

  “Good evening Amsterdam. Is everybody ready to have a good time?” The crowd screamed around us, their collective voices echoing throughout the arena. Not feeling that they were pumped enough, I repeated the question, yelling into the microphone. “I said, is everybody ready to have a good time?” The response was electric, priming Dek for the intro to our first song. More screams followed as the crowd recognized the first riff of his guitar, and I started in on one of our most popular songs.

  I’ve fallen just below the surface

  And now its getting hard to breathe.

  I fight like hell to rise above it

  But something pulls me underneath.

  We made our way through four more songs off our last album. The crowd responded with the same enthusiasm we’d received at previous concerts. This is what keeps us going, we feed off the energy radiating throughout the arena. I turn to Dek, giving him a nod, and take the mic in my hand, walking around the stage. Dek played softly as I started to speak to the crowd.

  “Something happened to me around three years ago. Something many of you never even heard of. You see, I was a young man and I had a girl that loved me. But I didn’t fully appreciate that love. Then, one night our car collided with another and she was killed. That night changed my life. I became a shell of a man. Walking around in a drug induced haze or a drunken stupor. For nearly a year I did every thing I could to put my life at risk, never feeling worthy of more. And then I met Brooke, the one woman that turned my world on it’s axis, and made me look at things in a whole new way. I fell in love, and I fell hard. Guys, you know what I’m talking about, don’t you?” I heard screams of ‘hell yeah, man,’ and quite a few expletives. “Now, I’m on tour and she’s over in London, and I’m not gonna lie, it’s hard. But the one thing I’ve learned from loving her is to hold on tight and never give up. So baby, I love you, and this one’s for you.” I began singing one of her favorites, “Heart Is On Fire.”

  Taking a chance as we walk on a wire

  Never let go until your heart is on fire.

  Erasing the emptiness, like a hit man for hire

  Never let go until your heart is on fire.

  We played through eight more songs, the crowd never tiring, before we left the stage, screams for an encore echoing behind us. We were whipped, but this crowd had been awesome and we didn’t want to disappoint.

  “What do you say guys?” Travis gave a head-tilt, and twirled his drum sticks through his fingers. “Got a few more in you?”

  “Hell yeah!” Chris bellowed, bounding back out there as if someone had just given him a shot of adrenaline.

  “You guys have been a fantastic audience!” I yelled, riling them up even more. “You want to hear some more?” My cocky swagger brought on a multitude of wolf whistles and muffled propositions. Laughter echoed wickedly through the microphone as I moved over the stage.

  “Yeah!” They chorused back at me. It was music to my ears. I slung a guitar over my shoulder and made my way over to Dek. We started in on one of our newer songs, a hard rocking beat with a strong drum-line and lots of guitar solos for Dek.

  A shot rings out in the still of the night.

  Man goes down without a witness in sight.

  Shooter gets away while the blood begins to seep.

  Man calls out but no one hears,

  His voice. Is. Too weak.

  Three songs later we exit the stage as more chanting followed. This time we kept walking, making our way through the maze that made up the ar
ea backstage. Stage hands and roadies called out to us, telling us what a great show it was, as they made their way to stage and begin disassembling the set-up.

  “Great show guys. Really great.” Davis entered the room, clapping his hands firmly together. “I loved that encore kick-off. Sebastian, you and Dek really need to do more simultaneous guitar playing. The crowd ate it up.” His toothy grin took up most of the space on his face. Most days I couldn't stand the guy, but he was good at what he did, so we kept him around.

  “Yeah, it’s all good, but I’m ready to pack up and move out. I need to get to London.”

  “Yeah, come on Davis, let’s get an early start, our boy has a girl waiting on him.” Chris looked over and gave me a jaunty wink. I couldn’t help but shake my head. Man, I love that guy.

  Brooke~

  I love Sunday mornings. Max only keeps the restaurant open for brunch on these days, so that means I go in just before seven and finish up at two. That gives me the entire afternoon and evening to stroll around the city or hang out in my cozy little apartment. This afternoon Reid and I are going to check out the new produce at one of the local shops. We’ve developed a really good rapport with the owner, and he calls to give us a heads up when something new or exotic comes in.

  The restaurant Reid works for is only a few doors down from Lardon’s, so it’s not unusual for our regular customers to also frequent their establishment. Both are known for their equally impressive dishes. I’ve dined there on a few occasions and have to agree that Reid runs an efficient kitchen, plus, the food was amazing. He’s only a few years older than me, but we graduated from culinary school right around the same time. His early years in the kitchen weren’t quite the same as mine. He had to work a bit harder to climb the ladder, but his skills ultimately got him the position he holds today.