Because You Love Me

by Mari Carr

  “No problem,” Rodney said smoothly. “Need a hand with the stove?”

  Matt slapped Rodney on the back in a friendly manner. “Hell yeah. That fucker is ancient. Probably weighs a ton.”

  Rodney turned to her. “Go on up, Bridge. I’ll be there in a little while. Once we’ve sorted stuff out in the kitchen.”

  No doubt her protector intended to minimize the damage she’d done in terms of compromising their cover story. Climbing the stairs, she tried to summon a bit of guilt for messing things up. For some reason, she couldn’t do it. Foolish or not, she felt safe here. Her gut told her she could trust these people. It had been a long time since she’d experienced that. It gave her hope for the future. Maybe she wouldn’t always be frightened. Maybe the old Bridget was still inside, lurking, waiting for the right time to reemerge.

  Please let that be true.

  She had reached the door to her room when she recalled Matt’s tempting offer. She smiled and let herself pretend she really was on vacation. She may be a city girl, but she had no doubt she was more than ready to saddle up and ride with those cowboys. She could just imagine all the juicy daydreams she could conjure up in regards to the James brothers.

  Maybe her time spent in this room wouldn’t be so boring after all.

  For the first time in a long time, the downhill spiral of her life appeared to be changing direction. Yee haw.

  Chapter Two

  The next morning, Bridget sat down for breakfast in the B&B’s dining room. As she’d expected, Rodney had given her an ass-chewing of epic proportions the previous afternoon. It was well deserved, but she was still smarting a bit from it.

  The only reason she had been allowed to come back out in public was because Rodney had determined Todd, Steven and the hunky twin cowboys were decent guys who didn’t have a clue who she and Rodney really were. Besides, as he’d said, the damage was done. There were now witnesses who could identify them to anyone who came looking. The four men would become suspicious if she suddenly took to hiding in the room. He’d decided it would be better if they went about their business as if everything were normal. However, he stressed she wasn’t allowed to set one foot outside the inn.

  So much for her riding lessons dream.

  Because of the mess she’d made, Rodney’s new goal was to find a secluded cabin to rent in the woods near Saratoga while they tried to piece together the clues in the remainder of the letter.

  Much to her chagrin, they would have to leave the B&B immediately. Bridget was loath to return to the solitary existence that had become her normal life the past few months. While Rodney was nice company, she hadn’t realized how much she’d missed people until yesterday’s flirtatious conversation with Matt and Mark. She was tired of being alone and lonely.

  Guilt pierced her heart with that thought. Lyle’s face as he lay dead on the cold warehouse floor flashed before her eyes. She was doing this for him. She’d made him a promise that night. Three more weeks. Twenty-one days until she could see justice served. She owed that to Lyle. Until then, it was too selfish to wish for anything else.

  Once she’d repaid that debt, she’d figure out a way to return to her own life. She just prayed she could find it again.

  “That’s not a very happy face.”

  Bridget jumped, nearly spilling the glass of water Todd had put in front of her only a few minutes earlier. “Oh God!”

  “Damn. Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.” Quick hands reached out to catch the water.

  Speak of the devils. Bridget glanced up to find Matt and Mark looking down at her.

  “Hey,” she said, the racing of her heart no longer based on fear. The sight of the cowboys sent her body into overdrive. “What are you guys doing here?”

  Mark removed his hat, running his hand through his hair. “Todd offered us a big breakfast as a thank you for moving the oven. We don’t turn down one of his western omelets.”

  “They’re that good?”

  Matt followed his brother’s lead, removing his hat as well. “Best in the state. Sorry about scaring you. Thought you saw us walk in.”

  She shrugged off her unwanted fears, forcing a lie from her lips. “I was daydreaming.”

  “Must have been some dream to take you so far away. Didn’t look like a particularly nice one either,” Mark said.

  She used to believe nightmares were only for sleeping. However, after spending the past six months wide awake in the midst of a horrible dream, she now knew better.

  She forced the unpleasant thought from her mind and painted on a smile. For now, she was exactly where she wanted to be—surrounded by nice people in a place that felt safe and homey. She’d focus on that instead. She gestured at the empty seats across from her. “Would you like to join me?”

  Mark grinned. “Thought you’d never ask.”

  She rubbed her hands on her lap as they each claimed a chair at the table. Sweaty palms? Was it due to anxiety from her earlier concerns or girlish nervousness over being so close to the James twins? Rodney would kill her for pushing her luck, but she was running perilously low on common sense or care these days.

  The months since Lyle’s shooting had passed in one long blur of constant pain, limitless fatigue and never-ending motion. She was tired of being suspicious of everyone.

  Prior to Lyle’s murder, she’d never known a stranger. She’d won friendliest in her high school yearbook’s Who’s Who, and she missed talking to people, hanging out with friends, dating. Most of all, she really missed sex. Not that she was promiscuous, but criminy, it had been nearly a year since she’d even kissed a member of the opposite sex. She wasn’t cut out for a chaste lifestyle.

  On top of the everlasting horniness, it was exhausting to look at everyone as the enemy. She hated walking into a room and wondering if someone there was plotting her death. There was something comfortable about the handsome twins that told her she could trust them.

  Matt leaned back in his seat, stretching his long legs out beneath the table. His foot accidentally rubbed against hers. She had to fight to keep her libido at bay. “How’s your headache?”

  She frowned for a moment, wondering what he was talking about. Then she recalled Rodney’s lie. “Oh, it’s fine. All better.”

  Todd came out of the kitchen and made a beeline for their table. “I was starting to wonder if you guys were going to take me up on my omelet offer.”

  “We had a bit of trouble with one of the horses this morning. One of the Appaloosas threw a shoe. It set us back a bit of time,” Mark replied.

  “Well, it’s no problem. I’ve still got my new stove fired up and hot. I know what you guys want. What about you, Bridget?”

  “I’ll just have a bowl of cereal.” She wasn’t a hundred percent sure breakfast was included in the price of the stay.

  Matt shook his head. “Cereal? No wonder you’re so skinny. She’ll have an omelet too. On us.”

  “Oh, you don’t have to—”

  Mark reached across the table and patted her hand. “We’re not letting you leave Wyoming without trying this omelet.”

  She laughed. “Well, in that case, I suppose I’d better relent.”

  Todd poured each of them a cup of coffee before heading back to the kitchen. She’d postponed coming down for breakfast, thinking she could avoid the rush. She thought her plan had worked as she’d had the whole place to herself for a few minutes. Funny, how the space had seemed large and cold when she’d been alone with only her sad memories. Now, with the James twins flanking her, the room seemed pleasantly crowded and decidedly warmer. For the first time in a very long time, fate was smiling on her.

  Mark leaned over and put his cowboy hat on the vacant table next to them. “Did you give any thought to our offer for riding lessons?”

  She tried to find a way to put them off without seeming rude. There was simply no way she could afford to pay for lessons even if Rodney agreed to it, which he wouldn’t. He’d gone off early this morning to find them somewhere
else to stay, and he’d been very firm in his instructions that she “lay low”. There was a good chance he’d succeed in securing them a new hiding spot, and by afternoon, they’d be crawling into some other lonely hole.

  “I have a confession,” she said. Both men were looking at her intently. She was entranced by their similarities. They were mirror images of each other. It was almost unnerving.

  Matt grinned. She’d noticed yesterday that Matt had a slight cleft in his chin his brother didn’t share. It was her only clue in telling them apart. “They say confession is good for the soul.”

  “There’s a difference between wanting something and doing something.” She almost winced as she said the words. She wanted something—two somethings—but there was no way she could do anything about that desire. Mainly because she was running for her life, and secondly, who wanted two men…at the same time? It was ludicrous. “While the idea of being a cowgirl sounds like fun, I’m deathly afraid of horses.”

  The words weren’t exactly a lie. She’d nearly been run down by a horse-drawn carriage in Central Park as a child. The experience had stuck with her, and since then she’d given those carts, as well as police horses, a very wide berth.

  Mark shook his head in disbelief. “What? How can you be afraid of horses? They’re the most loving, gentle creatures on earth.”

  She shrugged. “They’re huge, attract flies, and their eyes are on the sides of their heads. I find that very unnerving.”

  Matt burst into laughter. “I’m not sure I’ve ever heard that excuse for a fear of horses, but you’ve got a point.”

  Mark gave his brother a warning glance that was more amused than annoyed. “Don’t encourage her. She shouldn’t be afraid of horses.”

  Bridget leaned closer. “I’m not sure it’s fear as much as I’m simply not familiar with them. The only horses I’ve ever seen were city creatures—police horses or ones hooked to carriages. The whole concept of getting up on one of those things isn’t a comfortable concept to me. I mean, if you want to know how to get from midtown to Canal Street on the subway, I’m your girl. You want to know the quickest route from point A to point B so the taxi driver doesn’t rip you off, ask me. Put me on a horse and I wouldn’t even know how to make the thing go. It’s not like you can put money in the slot and have it take off.”

  Matt chuckled. “Girl, you haven’t lived until you’ve ridden a horse.”

  “I’m fine with the subway and taxis, thank you very much. I prefer my modes of transportation to have wheels, not legs.”

  Todd emerged from the kitchen carrying three large platters. Bridget’s eyes widened at the sheer volume of food on her plate. “You expect me to eat all of that?” There were two pieces of thick toast slathered in butter, an omelet the size of her pillow, and at least five pounds of potatoes, whipped up hash brown style with green peppers and onions.

  Since going rogue with Rodney, they’d existed on peanut butter sandwiches and cereal. Her mouth watered and her stomach growled.

  “Don’t worry, sweetheart,” Matt said, snatching a slice of toast of her plate. “We’ll help you finish whatever you can’t eat.”

  She reached over and grabbed a piece of his toast to replace hers. “Don’t worry about me. We city girls know how to eat.”

  Mark picked up his fork and lifted an eyebrow. “I find that hard to believe. You’re too skinny to be that good an eater.”

  “You know, that’s the second time you boys have called me skinny. I’m starting to feel like that’s an insult.”

  Matt’s gaze drifted down her body, away from her face. “Believe me, there’s no insult intended.” His eyes lifted and met hers once more. “You’re damn easy on the eyes.”

  She blushed at his compliment. There was something so open, so honest about both men that she found it hard to resist them. She tried to dismiss the thought from her mind because she certainly wasn’t going to have a chance to get to know either of them better.

  Conversation slowed as the three of them dug in to their enormous breakfasts. She had to hand it to the twins. It was, by far, the best omelet she’d ever had, and for the first time in a long time, she let herself enjoy a meal. Lately, eating had become something she had to do to survive. Back in New York, she’d loved going to different restaurants, trying different things. She missed the salad at Carmine’s and the little Thai place in Hell’s Kitchen.

  “Damn, Mark, doesn’t look like we’re going to get to help her clean her plate after all,” Matt joked.

  Glancing down, Bridget realized she’d polished off all of the eggs and was almost finished with the hash browns. “I can’t believe I ate all that, or how good it was.”

  Mark wiped his mouth with his napkin and put it back in his lap. “You looked like you hadn’t eaten in a year. I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

  “I did. I can see why you’d ask for that as payment for work. Todd’s an amazing cook.”

  Matt put his fork down and leaned back in his chair, looking relaxed and well fed. “We come over here quite a bit for breakfast and lunch. Used to be four bachelors living in our house. Cooking wasn’t something we had a lot of time for.”

  Bridget leaned forward and rested her arms on the table. She was genuinely curious to learn more about them. “Four bachelors?”

  Mark joined in the conversation. “Matt and I live with our older brother, Caleb, and our kid brother, Jacob. Caleb’s a doctor at the local hospital, so he works some screwed-up hours. Jacob does a lot of the cooking, but he’s what you might call a free spirit, so counting on him for vittles is risky. Whenever he gets involved in a project—whether it’s an article he’s writing or something for his college class—it can be days before he looks up.”

  Bridget’s ears perked up. “Article?” She missed her writing more than she could say.

  Matt nodded. “Yep. Kid loves to write. He freelances for a couple of magazines and newspapers. Mainly stories about gay rights, living life outside the closet, stuff like that.”

  “Your brother is gay?”

  Mark stiffened up slightly and she backtracked quickly, afraid she’d offended him. “I wasn’t asking to pry or to insinuate anything is wrong with that. Fact is, Rodney is gay too. I was thinking maybe we should introduce them.”

  Matt laughed. “You want to hook our brothers up?”

  Bridget grinned. “No…well, maybe.”

  If Rodney was feeling as lonely and horny as she was these days, maybe a hot hookup with a cowboy would take the edge off. Lately, Rodney had been wound up tighter than a spring. Not that she blamed him. In all likelihood, he’d lost his job at the police station the day he’d stepped off the radar with her. His future was as uncertain as hers at the moment. “Is your younger brother as hot as you two?”

  Bridget wasn’t sure where the words had come from, but the deadly dimples reappeared on both of the men’s faces as their smiles grew.

  Mark leaned toward her, taking her hand in his. She hoped he couldn’t feel the sudden trembling there. “You think we’re hot?”

  Both of them had moved closer, and she had to press her legs together to still the sudden twinge in her pussy.

  Matt grasped her other hand. “Who’s hotter—me or Mark?”

  She burst into laughter as she studied their mirrored images. Mark rolled his eyes at his brother’s inane comment. Then she realized there were other definite differences besides the cleft chin. As she learned more about them, they suddenly didn’t seem so similar.

  Matt was clearly the fun-loving one with a great sense of humor. There was a wicked twinkle in his eyes that guaranteed he was always up for a good time. In contrast, Mark seemed the epitome of a country gentleman: kind, more serious. She had no doubt he was the type of guy who opened doors for women and insisted on picking up the tab.

  “I plead the Fifth on that question. So what did you mean when you said it used to be four bachelors? Did someone move out?”

  Mark shook his head. “Nope, someone moved in.�
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  Bridget’s heart skipped a beat. Did one of them have a girlfriend? She’d never considered they may already have significant others. “Oh?”

  Matt offered the explanation. “Caleb got himself a girlfriend, Jessie. We’re expecting him to pop the question any day now.”

  She smiled, foolishly relieved. “Nice. You like her?”

  “Jessie?” Mark asked. “Oh, heck yeah. She’s a helluva lady. Been through a rough patch this past year. She and Caleb deserve a little happiness.”

  Bridget could relate to tough years. “So she’ll live at the ranch with all of you?”

  Matt shook his head. “Nah. I figure they’ll want to start a family pretty soon. Since Mark and I run the ranch, it’s hard for us to move out. We need to be close to the stables. Caleb mentioned building his own house closer to the main road to make it easier for him during the winter when he’s on call. We have a fairly long driveway, and after it snows, it takes some effort to plow it so he can get out.”

  She was used to snowy winters in New York. It was one of the things she’d missed this year. She and Rodney had spent a great deal of the last few months hopping from safe house to safe house in the south. They’d celebrated Christmas in Phoenix and the temperature had been in the eighties that day. At the time, she’d considered the lack of snow a blessing. With the heat and unfamiliar surroundings, she could pretend it wasn’t Christmas, and it kept her homesickness at bay.

  “Sounds like you own quite a bit of property.”

  Mark nodded. “We do okay. Our family’s lived in this area for several generations. It’s home.”

  “It must be nice to have such solid roots. I grew up in the city, but my parents were originally from Jersey.”

  “You have any other brothers or sisters besides Rodney?” Matt asked.