[2016] A Widow's Love

by Christian Michael

  He didn’t know when sleep finally claimed him, all he knew was it only felt like a few minutes before the rooster was crowing outside.

  Chapter 8 – A New Start

  Fall leaves crowned the tree line at the edge of the field now. Jessie walked slowly, a basked in one hand, the other hand wrapping her shawl around her shoulders. The air was getting chillier, and she rarely left the house without her shawl or a coat.

  This morning, Jessie wanted to take a stroll in the field she had gone to with Toby a couple months before. There was a peacefulness there that she couldn’t find anywhere else. Toby was busy most of the time now, doing something out in the barn.

  He spent almost all of this free time out there, working with the wood he had left over from the extra room he had built on to the house. It had taken him nearly a month to complete it, but was finally done. As soon as that project had been finished, he spent every spare minute he had in the barn.

  Jessie missed Toby. She had grown used to the business like nature of their marriage, and was enjoying the companionship she found with Toby around. She still felt that twinge of emptiness in her heart every now and then, but for the most part she was happy.

  After all, her baby was to be born in just over a month, and she would have her hands full. Every now and then she wanted to go out to the barn and talk to Toby while he worked, but he told her she wouldn’t want to be in that dirty old barn, breathing in the dust in the condition she was in, so she spent her days alone in the house.

  In her free time, Jessie spent hours knitting things for the baby. She had made a scarf for Toby for the turning weather, but she hadn’t seen him wear it. Now she worked diligently on a baby blanket for her little one. It was a bright blue, like the sky had been the first day she had arrived in California.

  Suddenly, she heard a shout, and turned. Toby was calling for her, and hurried to catch up to her.

  “There you are Missy! I have been looking all over for you… come here, I want to show you something.” Toby reached for her hand, and Jessie looked at him in surprise.

  She reluctantly agreed and hurried as best she could beside his lively steps. There was something different about him, something she couldn’t put her finger on, but something that made her heart pound.

  Was it the way he looked at her? Normally, he would speak looking away from her, or just give her a glance when he finished. Now, he looked at her full on, gazing into her eyes. She felt vulnerable when he did that, but excited at the same time.

  They hurried to the barn, and Toby suddenly turned to face her.

  “Now, I want you to go in front of me, and I am going to cover your eyes. Don’t worry, there’s nothing in the way for you to trip on, just walk in a few steps, and stop when I say.”

  “Toby?” She asked, but he shushed her and walked behind her, covering her eyes from behind.

  They walked into the barn, and Toby stopped.

  “Are you ready?” He asked, and she nodded.

  “Look!”

  He lifted his hands off of her eyes, and Jessie blinked, letting her eyes adjust to the darkness of the barn. There, right in front of her, stood the most beautiful cradle she had ever seen. It was carved out of mahogany, and stained with a chestnut stain.

  “Oh Toby!” She cried.

  “Do you like it?” He asked, concerned, then continued. “I wanted to make you something special for your little one, Jess.

  Listen to me. This is hard for me to say, mostly because I don’t understand it myself, but I love you Jessie. I really do. When I was young, and I saw the pain my father felt when my mother passed away, I promised myself I wouldn’t fall in love.

  I wanted to save myself that pain, until I met you. You changed everything for me, Jessie. You are so beautiful and so kind and so charming. I just couldn’t help it. I fell in love.”

  Jessie felt her throat get tight as he spoke. She had never dreamed this is what he was doing out here in the barn, and the fact that he told her how much he loved her made her feel like she was on top of the world. All she had wanted when she came out here was to find love, and now she had.

  “Toby I-“ She began, but he interrupted her.

  “Don’t anything. I don’t want to hear you say anything. All I want is the truth. I know I haven’t been the kind of husband you deserve, and I know I wasn’t the man you thought I was when you moved out here, but I have to know… Do you love me?”

  He looked anxiously into her eyes, and waited.

  A smile slowly spread across Jessie’s face, and she had tears in her eyes as she nodded.

  “Yes, I do love you Toby. I do!”

  Jessie threw her arms around his neck and kissed him, and he gently lifted her up off the floor. She felt complete at last. Her child was going to be born into a home filled with love. A home that was happy. A home that was ready for a baby.

  Toby paced back and forth in the living room. Jessie had gone into labor earlier that day, and now the doctor was in the room with her, and all he could do was wait for the news. He wished there was more he could do to help, this waiting was driving him crazy.

  He could hear Jessie making noise in the other room, and he prayed she would be ok. He couldn’t shake the fear of losing her out of his mind no matter how hard he tried, and he wouldn’t feel better until he knew she was ok.

  After what felt like hours, the doctor finally appeared in the door. Toby turned quickly, though he stayed in the middle of the room.

  “You should be very proud, Mr. Mathews,” the doctor said as he wiped his hands on a towel.

  “You have a new son. Mother and child are both just fine, would you like to see them?”

  Toby hurried into the room to find Jessie holding a small bundle in her arms. She looked up and smiled as he came into the room, and he kissed her. He reached out and took the little baby in his arms, and kissed his son on the forehead.

  Jessie smiled at the sight, and laid back on the pillow. She had never been so happy in her whole life, and she knew no matter what happened next, she was going to be ok. She had her son, she had Toby, and she had love. Everything in life was absolutely perfect.

  She wouldn’t change a thing.

  THE END.

  Hope For A Widow

  Mail Order Bride

  CHRISTIAN MICHAEL

  “I do,” Elle panted, smiling at the man in front of her. Her skin was sticky with sweat, and her beautiful white dress chafed delicate areas of her flesh, but that didn’t stop the feeling of sweet relief to wash over. “I do,” she repeated, unable to help herself.

  Amusement glinted in her new husband’s eyes.

  The church they were in was small and rickety, the floorboards and window frames splintered and faded. There were so many people there to watch her and Duncan Aster get married that these men and women were forced to remain standing while pressing against one another; there were even a few people peeking through the windows outside the church.

  The day was hot and muggy, and the presence of all of these people made the air in the church all the more suffocating.

  Elle knew none of them. These were Duncan’s friends and neighbors, for this was Duncan’s home—Chinnawah, Kansas. She had just gotten off a train from New York City by herself a few days ago. None of her family or friends had followed her, and with any luck, none of them would ever find her.

  “You may now kiss the bride,” the pastor said. He stood before the both of them more like an altar than a person, his arms spread wide and his head held high.

  Duncan leaned forward, and Elle met him the rest of the way. The kiss was brief and gentle, but it made a reassuring warmth shoot through her body. She was finally his wife; she was finally Mrs. Aster. It was as if Eleanor “Elle” Mayweather had faded away in the midst of this rebirth of sorts. Perhaps now she and her unborn child were truly safe.

  The people applauded and cheered, backing away as best as they could so that Elle and Duncan could actually exit the church.


  The pastor said some more words, but Elle couldn’t hear him over the crowd. She just let a grinning Duncan grab her hand and lead her toward the church doors.

  At this point in her pregnancy, Elle merely looked a little round—a little bloated. Thank God Duncan didn’t seem to care. She couldn’t go back to New York if he had turned her down the moment she stepped off that train to meet him, and she didn’t think she could survive in the west with nothing to her name but the clothes on her back, her sack of other items, and the fetus growing inside of her.

  Thank God Duncan hadn’t taken back his proposal—the one he made to her in his last letter to her. She would admit to having basically coerced it out of him. They had only written back and forth to each other a few times, and neither one of them truly knew the other, but Elle didn’t have the time to take things slow. She had had to leave New York City as soon as possible.

  “It’s beautiful here,” she said as they walked back to his—to their home.

  Duncan had a small house on the outskirts of town. It could be seen from the church—out in the dirt-covered valley, the horizon seeming to slice through it from the angle Elle was seeing it at. There were no other homes near this place, nor any barns. It was just a house and its land, and that was just fine with Elle.

  Duncan snorted at her. “You’re being kind.”

  “Obviously,” she said, tightening her grip on his hand as she bumped into him. “I’m a kind person. I can’t be anything but kind.”

  He turned to her and gave her a playful smirk. Though she hadn’t initially cared if Duncan was handsome or not, she had been delighted to discover that he was. He had a strong jaw, piercing blue eyes, and a well-toned body that made her shiver in all kinds of ways. But the best part about him was how easy going he was. He didn’t intimidate her, nor pressure her, and that was what really mattered in the end.

  Thinking of this, Elle glanced over her white dress as they continued to walk. It was getting stained by the orange and brown dirt that blew through the wind, especially around the dress’s bottom trim. However, she wasn’t bothered by it, nor was Duncan. Duncan had given her the dress as a formality, and neither one of them felt too emotionally connected to it. Perhaps if he had courted her the more proper way, she might have felt differently about it. Maybe they both would have.

  They continued on in companionable silence after that. Once they were inside the house, Elle began to unzip and shimmy out of her dress. Being bold wasn’t new to her, but she still felt a tinge of nervousness jitter within her stomach. This was going to be hers and Duncan’s first time, after all.

  Standing in the entryway, Duncan gaped at her. The sunset casted bright orange light through the house’s windows, making the furniture within the home seem to glow with an orange-ish, yellowish hue.

  It was a nice setting, Elle thought as she peeled out of her poofy and stained dress. It relaxed her, even as she mentally prepared herself for her upcoming wedding night.

  “Elle,” Duncan said, his eyes conveying conflicting emotions. “We don’t…I mean, if you’re not ready…”

  In her undergarments now, Elle walked over and grabbed both of his rugged hands. Her heart hammered in her chest as her skin began to seep out more sweat. However, as nervous as she was about all of this, she was even more nervous about not getting this process over with. After all, it was imperative that Duncan believe that the child in her womb was his.

  “Come on, honey,” she whispered, keeping her mouth open a little. She took deep breaths and forced her body not to quiver. “I’ve been waiting so long for you.”

  Duncan still looked unsure. Perhaps he had never been with a woman before; perhaps he was insecure. Or perhaps he was simply trying to look out for her. No matter what the case, Elle recognized that she would have to be gentle and reassuring.

  “I want this,” she said, smiling. “If you want to take this slow, we can take it slow. I won’t bite.”

  He huffed at that, shaking his head. “We’ll take it slow.”

  She nodded, her smile softening.

  He visibly relaxed before nodding in return. “Okay.”

  When she tugged him toward her, he followed and immediately wrapped his arms around her waist. She moved her head upward and kissed him. As promised, she moved slowly against him. It was actually kind of calming, the way they seemed to synch to one another so readily.

  Then their kiss grew hungrier—needier. She moaned, bringing her hands up to claw into his scalp.

  Whatever reservations Duncan had had, they were clearly gone as he pulled and pushed her toward their bedroom.

  ***

  Duncan lived off of his family’s money, unbeknownst to them—or, well, they probably knew by now. Either way, he kept his purchases cheap and his lifestyle manageable, so he hadn’t had to worry too much about finding a job just yet. And at times, he would sell some of his old things or barter with the neighbors, and that worked out fine with him. It had been lonely way to live though. He had enough money to last him years, but no one to share it with. He certainly couldn’t return home, and the people in town were either married or uninterested in someone as closed off and lazy as him.

  Putting an ad for a wife in the paper had been a Hail Mary, and Elle’s response had been a miracle.

  She wasn’t what he thought she would be; she was simple, flexible, undemanding, patient—a lovely woman, through and through. He had some doubts when he first sent his proposal to her, but she had been so eager to leave her city-life behind, and he had grown very curious about what she looked like and what she sounded like. He also was tired of his own loneliness, and even a little desperate to make it cease.

  The moment he officially met Elle at the train station, Duncan hadn’t been disappointed. She was beautiful and charming. She had worn a baby blue dress and a dark bonnet, her vibrant eyes somewhere in between those two colors. And she was so straight-forward with him about every little thing—how she felt, what she wanted—and the way she flirted with him…at times, she actually had him blushing and stuttering like a schoolboy.

  He could definitely fall for this woman. And now, a few days after their wedding, life was already better. Sleeping next to her seemed to be giving him pleasant dreams again, and hearing her walk around the house soothed the weariness out of his heart. Air was easier to breathe, despite the fact that the summer was muggy.

  Sitting on the porch’s front steps, Duncan sipped from the glass of ice-cold lemonade Elle had brought out for him. He stared at the distant town with a hazy kind of awareness. The heat made the air warp and jiggle, and he watched it with curiosity while the beverage in his gut cooled him. So content, he thought he might just let himself drift off then and there—fall asleep in an awkward sitting position. Elle would wake him if she needed him. The thought had him smiling.

  As if thinking her name had summoned her, Elle opened the front door and walked toward him. By the time he was turning to regard her, she had already plumped herself down next to him. She clutched his arm with both of her small hands, and he couldn’t help but smile wider in response.

  She looked at him for a moment, her eyes narrowed and her lips pressed together. She didn’t seem perturbed, rather calculating. Before he could ask her what was wrong, her expression broke out into one of pure joy and excitement. “I’m pregnant,” she blurted.

  Duncan’s stomach dropped, and he nearly lost his grip on his glass. “Wha—?” It took him a few seconds to fully comprehend her words, and when he did, he furrowed his brow. “How could you know so soon? We just had…we…” He cleared his throat. Normally, he wouldn’t be so embarrassed about subjects like this, but Elle had made him…softer, in lack of a better term. “Is that possible?”

  “Woman’s intuition,” she said proudly, still beaming at him. “Isn’t this great? We’re going to have a family. A little boy or a little girl.” She bounced a little in her seat, her grip on his arm tightening.

  It wasn’t that Duncan hadn’t expected to
have children with Elle, but he thought that it wouldn’t happen until much, much later. Hell, when one of his neighbors’ wives got pregnant, the two of them had been married for over three years. And when Duncan’s parents first conceived him, they had been married for eight months.

  “Unbelievable,” he said, forcing himself to smile. He glanced her up and down, confused. “Are you sure? I mean…that’s awfully fast, don’t you think?”

  “Trust me, darling,” Elle said, leaning against his shoulder and pressing a kiss against his jaw. “A woman knows when she is carrying a child.”

  Duncan couldn’t think of a response to that. He supposed it made sense, not that he knew much about pregnancies or women’s anatomies. He gulped down the rest of his lemonade, the icy liquid sending pleasant chills throughout his torso and gut. It wasn’t quite as effective as a shot would have been to numb his sudden stress, but it was fine enough. And it was all he had at the moment.

  “Are you alright?” she asked him, her tone much softer now. “You look worried.”

  He lowered his glass and coughed up some lemon-flavored spittle. “I’m fine.” He nearly winced at his choice of words, and instead turned and grinned at her. “I’m really happy. I’m going to be a father.”

  “It is exciting, isn’t?” She patted his shoulder. Then her entire expression shifted into something casual, as if the last few moments hadn’t even occurred. “Alright, I’m going to start making lunch. Is there anything in particular you feel like eating today? Preferably something that goes good with lemonade. I made a lot of that.”

  He shook his head, and before he knew it, she was bounding up the porch’s steps and back into the house.

  Duncan sighed, his chest constricting. He had been a terrible, terrible son to his own father. How could he raise a child? He wasn’t quite sure if he was a good husband yet. Elle seemed happy enough, but she also sometimes felt distant. Although, how could he blame her? They had only been with each other for a few days now.