The Trouble with Patience

by Maggie Brendan

  “Something like that,” he said. “Let’s not waste our time talking about it. Not now.”

  “All right, but you might consider forgiveness, Cody. If you have resentment in your heart, it will only eat away at you. Besides, you’re still here and enjoying life, it seems.” She squeezed his hand.

  “I don’t think forgiveness is likely,” he muttered. The dance ended, and after another glass of punch, Patience said, “I’m about ready to get back home—how about you?” She looked around at the other guests beginning their departures.

  “Really? All tuckered out? I’m not, but I’ll take you home,” Cody abruptly responded.

  “It is getting rather late, and I promised Emily we’d go to church together tomorrow. I’d better get home. But if you’d rather stay longer, I can catch a ride with her and Monty.”

  “Aww . . . I hate for you to do that . . .” But even as he said it, he was glancing around the dance floor. Is he looking for Millie, or one of the other ladies?

  “Oh, it’s no problem,” she assured him. “You stay and enjoy the rest of the dance.”

  He turned back to Patience. “If you’re sure. I am having a good time . . .”

  Yes, and it doesn’t include me! I don’t know why I thought he was attracted to me. I should’ve known better. “Truly, it’s not a problem,” she said, taking a step toward the door.

  “Okay. See you soon.” And before she could respond further, he hurried away, making a beeline for Millie.

  Well! He could’ve at least walked me to the door. Apparently I don’t begin to compare to Millie. Slightly miffed, she gathered up her skirts and hurried away to find Monty and Emily.

  She was just about to give up when Jedediah approached her. “Are you looking for someone?” he asked, an eyebrow cocked. “Cody’s inside dancing with Millie,” he said with a grin, apparently not too worried that she would be perturbed.

  “Silly, I know that! I was looking for Emily and Monty,” she told him, eyes still searching the room.

  “Sorry, but you just missed them. They left about five minutes ago,” Jedediah said.

  “Oh, dear! I was hoping to catch a ride home—”

  Jedediah laughed, and pointedly looked over at Cody, still dancing. “A lovers’ quarrel?”

  Patience rolled her eyes. “Hardly. I’ve told you before we’re only friends. I wanted to leave, but Cody wanted to stay longer. Neither of us was with someone special tonight,” she added, looking at Jedediah, then quickly away as she felt her cheeks warm.

  He pushed his hat further back on his head. “Well, you’re in luck,” he said with a grin, obviously enjoying her discomfort, “because I’m just about to pull out of here. Millie seems to be enjoying Cody’s company more than mine. You’re welcome to hitch a ride with me. Or of course you can stay here and wait for Cody. But I have a gut feeling he’s going to be leaving with somebody else tonight.”

  Patience pretended to consider his offer. “Well . . . I suppose you’re right. Yes, and thank you,” she added, her formal tone belying her rapidly beating heart.

  Moments later, in Jed’s carriage, Patience draped her shoulders with her shawl, crossing her arms to her chest—to protect her shoulders from the cool air or from Jedediah’s closeness? She wasn’t certain. He had a magnetic pull on her that she couldn’t quite explain. She wondered what he was thinking. Is he feeling—?

  “Are you comfortable?” his voice interrupted her thoughts. “If you’re cold, I have a blanket in the back of the wagon I can put over your legs,” Jedediah said.

  “No, thank you. I’m perfectly warm.” She peered through the darkness at him, his profile outlined in the lantern’s light.

  He clicked to the horse, and they headed toward Nevada City, the bright lights from the ranch fading into the distance behind them.

  “Did you enjoy the evening?” Jedediah asked in a conversational tone.

  “It was fun,” Patience told him, also keeping her voice neutral. “I admit that I had two left feet when it came to the square dancing. But it was loads of fun trying to learn the calls.” Patience glanced at him again but couldn’t tell much about his expression in the dark.

  A great horned owl startled her with hoots from its perch, and she looked to her right in time to catch a glimpse of those bright yellow eyes staring back at them. “What a beautiful creature!” she couldn’t help but exclaim. “His eyes seem to pierce right through to my soul . . .” Patience twisted in her seat as they drove past the bird perched on the limb of a ponderosa pine.

  “Right you are. I’ve felt the same way.” Jedediah turned to look at her. “Have you ever sat below a wonderful ponderosa pine?”

  “I can’t say that I ever have,” she answered, wondering if he would continue.

  “In the hot summer, the tree smells like a mixture of citrus and turpentine, but the bark smells like vanilla. It’s very pleasant.” He looked back at the road, then added, “Maybe we could have a picnic beneath one sometime so you can experience that.”

  Patience’s next breath caught in her throat. “How interesting,” she finally managed. “I like your idea. Yes, perhaps we can have a picnic soon. I could put together a basket . . .”

  “Unless, of course, you and Cody have an understanding . . . ,” Jedediah put in, obviously trying to hide a grin.

  Patience chuckled. “Cody and I are only friends, as you might have noticed tonight. It would be—would be nice to have someone to do things with.” Her voice sounded rather lame to her own ears.

  “You do, Patience,” he said, a smile in his voice. “You’ve got Emily.”

  “Jed, is it possible you might be just a bit . . . well, a bit envious of my time spent with Cody?”

  “Nah,” he said easily. “But maybe since Emily works with you now, you two could find plenty to do together.” He looked at her, his grin making clear he was purposefully acting thickheaded, then added, his voice now gruff, “It seems to me Cody’s just about worn his welcome out, hanging around the Creekside.”

  “He was looking for work and helping me out too. He did have a room at the boardinghouse until he got his ranch job. He’s not renting a room there any longer.” She chuckled softly. “I hardly think he’s got any designs on me—at least not any longer. You’re right, Jed. I saw how he flirted with all the eligible ladies at the dance.”

  “In that case,” he responded carefully, “do you think I was out of line . . . with the embrace earlier tonight?” He’d slowed the horse’s pace to a walk, then did a half turn in his seat, the reins resting across his legs.

  Patience could feel her heart beating faster. Oh, what do I do, Lord? I don’t want my heart broken again. But I do think I’m beginning to care about him.

  She swallowed hard, then answered, “Uh . . . not exactly. It was a surprise though. I didn’t realize you had any feelings . . .” But she couldn’t finish.

  Jedediah steered the horse to the side of the road and pulled back on the reins. Only the lantern shone through the darkness surrounding them, silent at the side of the road.

  ———

  Her eyes were large and luminous in the lantern’s light but held a softness beneath those long lashes. They also held uncertainty, and Jedediah, who yearned to kiss her, knew she wouldn’t want that right now.

  It had been a very long time since he’d allowed himself to even imagine that any woman might be drawn to him. Was it possible? He turned away with a ragged breath and looked into the darkness, then back at her. But she simply sat there staring at him. Finally she straightened her shawl over her shoulders, looked away, and brushed at her eyes.

  Was she blinking back tears? He hoped they were good ones. “Patience, I hope you don’t think me too forward,” he said, his voice low.

  “I don’t know what to say. We haven’t known each other very long, and I don’t want to get ahead of myself or the Lord. I am coming to . . . to care for you, but I think we should take our time, get to know each other better before . . .”
/>
  “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” he said when she didn’t finish. “I think I understand what you are saying. Please forgive me.” His brow felt damp in the summer night, despite the cooling air. He picked up the reins, and the horse began to move forward. “But I’m glad you have been honest with me about your feelings,” he managed to say, his throat tight with emotions, his mind crowded with thoughts. After a while he asked, “Does this mean I may court you in the proper manner?” When she didn’t answer right away, he was sure he’d made a huge mistake. He glanced quickly at her. “Well?”

  Patience sighed. “I’m not sure I’m ready for anything that serious.”

  “Who said anything about serious?”

  She gave a small ladylike cough. “Well, doesn’t ‘serious’ go along with a man who asks about courting?”

  Jedediah was thoughtful for a moment. “Sometimes . . . but not always. Courting, at least at the beginning, gives two people time to get to know each other, see how well they might fit together . . . sort of like a puzzle.”

  “I see.”

  “We could start with that picnic next week under the ponderosa pines, if you’re willing.” He couldn’t believe he had worked up the nerve to ask her again. He’d spent a few sleepless nights thinking about just such an outing.

  The lights from the town were getting closer. “Let me think about it,” she finally answered.

  Jedediah sure didn’t want to push what seemed to be a glimmer of good fortune. To fill in the time during the remainder of the ride, he asked, “Do you have any siblings?”

  “No. I was an only daughter. Mother has a weak heart. Gradually it was more and more clear to me that she had wanted a son . . .” Her voice trailed off, and he saw her hand once again wipe at her eyes.

  “Mmm . . . I’m glad you turned out to be a daughter. I don’t think I’d be interested in picnicking with a son,” he said, trying to lighten the moment.

  He heard her small chuckle, then a sigh. “Sometimes I wonder. I basically took care of my mother with all her myriad ailments till I inherited my grandmother’s boardinghouse.” She sighed again, then turned to him. “What about you? Have you lived here long?”

  Jedediah didn’t want to talk about his past, and she didn’t need to know everything. “I lived in a few places before being appointed Deputy US Marshal when Montana became a territory. Then I came to Nevada City.”

  “Have you always had positions with the law?”

  “No, I didn’t have much schooling, and I’ve tried my hand at several different trades.”

  “Really? Like what?”

  Man, she’s full of questions! Was she persistent or just plain nosy? “Well . . . let’s see, I was a brick maker once and tried out farming in Kansas. I even took up shoemaking, but that was a most tedious job. I didn’t have the patience for it.” He looked over at her and grinned. When she looked puzzled, he said, “‘Patience’—get it?” and she laughed.

  “All very respectable trades, Jed,” she told him.

  “I suppose, but none seemed to fit me,” he said, trying to end the conversation before she attempted to dig anything else out of him. By now they’d entered Wallace Street, he noted with some relief. “I’ll bring you back to the Creekside, then get the horse and carriage on to the livery.”

  She nodded. “We can continue our conversation later. It’s very late.”

  He was happy to hear that she seemed to want to talk again, though he hoped it would be a new topic. “I’ll walk you to the door.” He turned to step out of the buggy, but Patience put her hand on his forearm.

  “No need to. I’m sure Emily and the others are back by now. I’m not afraid, you know.”

  “I know that for a fact, Patience, or you would’ve never come here on your own and lived alone. But a gentleman must walk the lady to her door.” He stepped out of the carriage and reached his hand up to her.

  “Even if she’s not the one he brought to the dance?” she joked, eyebrows quirked.

  Jedediah chuckled. “Even more so.”

  It felt rather odd to have a woman at his side, but he surmised that he could get used to it if given half a chance. He held her elbow up the front steps and turned to say good night, when a figure sitting at the end of the porch stood and moved out of the shadows toward them.

  15

  Patience gasped, and her hands flew to her mouth. “Mother! What on earth!” she exclaimed as the woman stepped out of the shadows. “Whatever are you doing here in Nevada City? And waiting here in the dark? You could have gone inside—”

  “Well, dear, is that any way to greet your mother?” Charity Cavanaugh asked archly. “I couldn’t very well go into the building this late without a key, could I? And it seems everyone has gone to bed—with the exception of you, of course.” She turned her head to look at Jedediah, then back to Patience. “Don’t you think it’s rather late to be out? And without a proper chaperone?” She didn’t wait for an answer but continued her chiding. “You certainly must remember, don’t you, that this cool mountain air is bad for my rheumatism and my heart?”

  No hug, nor even an “I’ve missed you.” The same attitude and comments that had compelled Patience to leave home. “Mother, you should have told me you were coming, and I would have made certain I was home.” Patience took a tentative step toward the woman.

  Charity waved a delicate white hanky, dismissing Patience’s explanation. “Please take me to a room with a nice, warm bed, and I’ll be grateful. Much better than that dusty old stage ride to get here.”

  Patience sighed and silently prayed that the visit would be a short one. “Mother,” she said, turning, “I’d like you to meet Jedediah Jones. He’s our town’s marshal.” She motioned with her hand. “Jed, this is my mother, Charity Cavanaugh.”

  Her mother turned to take another look at Jedediah. “So, you’re on a first-name basis with my daughter?” she said, the short, clipped tone all too familiar.

  “How do, ma’am,” Jedediah said, quickly sweeping off his hat. “Mighty nice to meet you.” He reached out his hand, which her mother barely touched with her leather-gloved fingertips.

  She’s already passed judgment on him. Patience knew it didn’t matter that her mother didn’t know anything about him. Charity wanted to be the one to choose whom Patience would be courted by—or, for that matter, married to. Patience could feel a headache coming and wished somehow her daddy would appear.

  “Right, Mother, let’s go in and get you settled. We can talk further in the morning.” Patience slipped her key out of her reticule and opened the door.

  “Can I carry that upstairs for you?” Jedediah motioned toward the two bags next to the rocker.

  “That won’t be necessary,” she snapped. “Patience is strong as an ox!”

  Well, thank you, Mother, for pointing that out. But Jedediah already had the bags in hand, and he slipped inside and quickly moved up the stairs and deposited them on the landing.

  “Humph,” the woman muttered, and followed Patience through the door.

  “Then I’ll leave you two alone,” Jedediah told them, stepping back onto the porch and putting on his hat. “I’ve got to get this carriage back to the livery now. Patience, thank you,” he finished somewhat indirectly, touching his finger to his hat.

  Patience ignored his attempt at discretion in front of her mother. “Thank you for bringing me home, Jed. We’ll talk again soon. I must go now and see to my mother’s needs.” She breathed deeply. Her mother’s presence seemed to have brought her scattered thoughts and feelings into some kind of order.

  “My pleasure, I assure you.” He tipped his hat, and Patience watched him climb into the carriage.

  Patience led her mother up the stairway, then picked up the larger one of the bags at the top. What in the world did she have stashed in there? She lugged it toward the only empty room and leaned for a moment against the smooth wood of the door to catch her breath. Her mother cleared her throat.

  �
��I must get the room key,” Patience said. “Fortunately there is one room not yet rented.”

  “Oh, don’t bother, dear. I can just share your room. I promise not to inconvenience you in the least.”

  “Oh no,” she said over her shoulder, already heading downstairs for the key. “That won’t work—I must be up very early. I’ll give you the best room in the house,” she called up the stairs, “the one at the front overlooking the main street. It’s only two doors down from mine. I usually use that one for newlyweds or someone special.”

  Charity was nodding, looking somewhat mollified. “Nice to know I’m special,” she called back. “Show me the way then, Patty. I’m thoroughly exhausted. If it weren’t so late, I’d have hot water for a bath brought up.”

  Patience brought the second bag to the room when she returned with key in hand. “Mother,” she began, holding herself in check with some effort, “you need to know it’s only Emily and I that work here, and with all the other things we must do, we are not able to draw baths for our boarders.” Patience turned the key in the lock, pushed the door open, and deposited the luggage inside. “As I said, we have no assistants, but tomorrow I’ll make time to bring up hot water for your bath.”

  Her mother leaned over to give Patience a peck on the cheek. “What a thoughtful daughter you’ve turned out to be. But who’s Emily?”

  “You’ll probably get to meet her tomorrow at breakfast.”

  “I’ll have mine on a tray in my room, dear, until I’m feeling more like myself,” Charity announced with a “poor me” face.

  Patience pressed her lips together to keep from saying something she might regret, such as the fact that her mother was quite capable of coming downstairs for breakfast. She paused at the door. “Mother, how long do you plan to stay?”

  Charity put a finger to her chin. “I haven’t decided, but I must see how you are doing, since I haven’t gotten more than a letter or two from you. If the answer is that things are going well, then I shall be satisfied. Daddy would want that.”