Stages on Life’s Way
Page 57
Alas, alas, alas! How fortunate that there is no reader who reads all the way through, and if there were any, the harm from being allowed to shift for oneself when it is the only thing he wishes, is, after all, like the punishment at the hand of the men of Molbo who threw the eel into the water. Dixi [I have spoken].588
SUPPLEMENT
Key To References
Original Title Page of
Stages on Life’s Way
Selected Entries from Kierkegaard’s
Journals and Papers Pertaining to
Stages on Life’s Way
KEY TO REFERENCES
Marginal references alongside the text are to volume and page [VI 100] in Søren Kierkegaards samlede Værker, I-XIV, edited by A. B. Drachmann, J. L. Heiberg, and H. O. Lange (1 ed., Copenhagen: Gyldendal, 1901-06). The same marginal references are used in Sören Kierkegaard, Gesammelte Werke, Abt. 1-36 (Düsseldorf Cologne: Diederich, 1952-69).
References to Kierkegaard’s works in English are to this edition, Kierkegaard’s Writings [KW], I-XXVI (Princeton: Princeton University Press, 1978-). Specific references to the Writings are given by English title and the standard Danish pagination referred to above [Either/Or, I, KW III (SVI 100)].
References to the Papirer [Pap. I A 100; note the differentiating letter A, B, or C, used only in references to the Papirer] are to Søren Kierkegaards Papirer, I-XI3, edited by P. A. Heiberg, V. Kuhr, and E. Torsting (1 ed., Copenhagen: Gyldendal, 1909-48), and 2 ed., photo-offset with two supplemental volumes, XII-XIII, edited by Niels Thulstrup (Copenhagen: Gyldendal, 1968-70), and with index, XIV-XVI (1975-78), edited by N. J. Cappelørn. References to the Papirer in English [JP II 1500] are to the volume and serial entry number in Søren Kierkegaard’s Journals and Papers, I-VI, edited and translated by Howard V. Hong and Edna H. Hong, assisted by Gregor Malantschuk, and with index, VII, by Nathaniel Hong and Charles Barker (Bloomington: Indiana University Press, 1967-78).
References to correspondence are to the serial numbers in Breve og Aktstykker vedrørende Søren Kierkegaard, I-II, edited by Niels Thulstrup (Copenhagen: Munksgaard, 1953-54), and to the corresponding serial numbers in Kierkegaard: Letters and Documents, translated by Henrik Rosenmeier, Kierkegaard’s Writings, XXV [Letters, Letter 100, KW XXV].
References to books in Kierkegaard’s own library [ASKB 100] are based on the serial numbering system of Auktionsprotokol over Søren Kierkegaards Bogsamling [Auction-catalog of Søren Kierkegaard’s Book-collection], edited by H. P. Rohde (Copenhagen: Royal Library, 1967).
In the Supplement, references to page and lines in the text are given as: 100:1-10.
In the notes, internal references to the present volume are given as: p. 100.
Three spaced periods indicate an omission by the editors; five spaced periods indicate a hiatus or fragmentariness in the text.
STAGES ON LIFE’S WAY.
Studies by Various Persons.
Compiled, forwarded to the press and published
by
Hilarius Bookbinder.
Copenhagen.
Available at University Bookseller C. A. Reitzel’s.
Printed by Bianco Luno Press.
1845.
SELECTED ENTRIES FROM KIERKEGAARD’S JOURNALS AND PAPERS PERTAINING TO STAGES ON LIFE’S WAY
See 199:25
What in a certain sense is called “spleen” and what the mystics knew by the designation “the arid moments,” the Middle [II A 484 186] Ages knew as acedia (ἀϰήδιɑ, aridity). Gregory, Moralia in Job, XIII, p. 435:1 Virum solitarium ubique comitatur acedia . . . . . est animi remissio, mentis enervatio, neglectus religiosae exercitationis, odium professionis, laudatrix rerum secularium [Wherever aridity encompasses a solitary man . . . . . . there is a lowering of spirit, a weakening of the mind, a neglect of religious practice, a hatred of professing, a praise of secular things].* That Gregory should emphasize virum solitarium points to experience, since it is a sickness to which the isolated person [is exposed] at his highest pinnacle (the humorous), and the sickness is most accurately described and rightly emphasized as odium professionis, and if we consider this symptom in a somewhat ordinary sense (not in the sense of churchly confession of sins, by which we would have to include the indifferent church member as solitarius) of a self-expression, experience will not leave us in the lurch if examples are required.
July 20, 1839
The ancient moralists show a deep insight into human nature in regarding tristitia [sloth, dejection] among the septem vitia principalia [seven deadly sins]. Thus Isidorus Hisp. See de Wette, translated by Scharling, p. 139, note q, top; see Gregor and Maximus Confessor in the same note—JP I 739 (Pap. II A 484) n.d., 1839
In margin of Pap. II A 484:
* This is what my father called: A quiet despair.2 —JP I 740 (Pap. II A 485) n.d., 1839
See 325:27-28:
Leibniz tells about a Baron Andrè Taifel who had a satyr and the following Spanish inscription on his coat of arms: mas perdido y menos arrepentido, plus perdu et moins repentant [the more lost, the less repentant],3 and that later a Count Villamedina, who was in love with the queen, used the same motto to indicate a hopeless passion that one nevertheless will not give up.
See Erdmann’s edition of Leibniz,4 p. 652, col. 2.—JP III 2362 (Pap. IV A 26) n.d., 1842-43
See 219:35-220:18:
If I should ever be accused of something, I would immediately petition His Majesty the favor of promptly receiving the most extreme (relative to the incident) sentence, even if it were execution, and that it be carried out immediately. I would make the petition for the following reasons: (1) because the trial costs money, (2) it costs time, and I have no time to wait for men to decide what is just, which is a matter of indifference to me, anyway, if I can just get it over with, (3) because all the talk about justice is drivel, and one may just as well have oneself executed outside the law and without being sentenced as by the verdict of three courts.5—JP V 5610 (Pap. IV A 34) n.d. 1843
See 283:1-25:
Outline
Once in his early youth a man allowed himself to be so far carried away in an overwrought irresponsible state as to visit a prostitute.6 It is all forgotten. Now he wants to get married. Then anxiety stirs. He is tortured day and night with the thought that he might possibly be a father, that somewhere in the world there could be a created being who owed his life to him. He cannot share his secret with anyone; he does not even have any reliable knowledge of the fact. —For this reason the incident must have involved a prostitute and taken place in the wantonness of youth; had it been a little infatuation or an actual seduction, it would be hard to imagine that he could know nothing about it, but now this very ignorance is the basis of his agitated torment. On the other hand, precisely because of the rashness of the whole affair, his misgivings do not really start until he actually falls in love.—JP V 5622 (Pap. IV A 65) n.d., 1843
See 283:34-284:25:
Outline [IV A 68 25]
A man who for a long time has gone around hiding a secret becomes mentally deranged. At this point one would imagine that his secret would have to come out, but despite his derangement his soul still sticks to its hideout, and those around [IV A 68 26] him become even more convinced that the false story he told to deceive them is the truth. He is healed of his insanity, knows everything that has gone on, and thereby perceives that nothing has been betrayed. Was this gratifying to him or not; he might wish to have disposed of his secret in his madness; it seems as if there were a fate which forced him to remain in his secret and would not let him get away from it. Or was it for the best, was there a guardian spirit who helped him keep his secret.7—JP V 5624 (Pap. IV A 68) n.d., 1843
See 16:18-19:
There is a place out in Gribs-Skov which is called the Nook of Eight Paths.8 The name is very appealing to me.—JP V 5643 (Pap. IV A 81) n.d., 1843
Deleted from journal; see 300:33-301:2:
At vespers on Easter Sunday in Frue Kirke (during Mynster’s sermon
), she nodded to me. I do not know if it was [IV A 97 37] pleadingly or forgivingly, but in any case very affectionately. I had sat down in a place apart, but she discovered it. Would to God she had not done so. Now a year and a half of suffering and all the enormous pains I took are wasted; she does not believe that I was a deceiver, she has faith in me. What ordeals now lie ahead of her. The next will be that I am a hypocrite. The higher we go, the more dreadful it is. That a man of my inwardness, of my religiousness, could act in such a way. And yet I can no longer live solely for her, cannot expose myself to the contempt of men in order to lose my honor—that I have done already. Shall I in sheer madness go ahead and become a villain just to get her to believe it—ah, what help is that? She will still believe that I was not that before.
Every Monday morning between nine and ten she met me. I made no effort to have it happen. She knew the street I usually walk; I knew the way she
[A page removed from the journal]
[IV A 97 38] I have done everything in order that she may not suspect that she perhaps bears a little bit of the guilt herself. A young girl should, after all, have calmness and humility. Instead, it was she who was proud; it was I who had to teach her humility by humbling myself. Then she took my depression wrong; she believed that I was so meek and humble because she was such a matchless girl. Then she took a stand against me. God forgive it—she awakened my pride. That is my sin. I ran her aground—she deserved it, that is my honest opinion—but not what happened later. Then it was that I became depressed; the more passionately she clung to me, the more responsible I felt. It would never have been so difficult if that conflict had not taken place. Then the bond broke.—JP V 5653 (Pap. IV A 97) n.d., 1843
See 287:6-35:
[IV A 105 40] The only person with whom I have ever had obscene talk is the old China-captain I converse with in Mini’s Café9 and who thinks I am forty years old. But our conversation is rather [IV A 105 41] more humorous. When he begins to tell me how in Manila everyone has a tart or about the fun he has had in his youth with tarts (it is his pet expression) in London, whom one treats with a glass of grog, “for they are so fond of it”—the situation is humorous enough, an old China-captain (seventy-four years old) talking with me in that way about such things. But he certainly was not particularly involved himself, for there is still a purity in him that testifies for him; as a consequence what he says is more humorous than obscene.10—JP V 5656 (Pap. IV A 105) n.d., 1843
See 262:38-263:21
What is the happiest life? It is [that of] a young girl sixteen years old, pure and innocent, who possesses nothing, neither a dresser nor a tall cupboard, but who makes use of the lowest drawer of her mother’s bureau to hide her treasures—a confirmation dress and a hymnbook . . . . . . Fortunate is he who owns no more than that he can live drawer to drawer with her.
What is the happiest life? It is [that of] a young girl sixteen years old, pure and innocent, who indeed can dance but who goes to a party only twice a year.
What is the happiest life? It is [that of] a young girl sixteen years old, pure and innocent, who sits by the window busily sewing, and all the while she sews she steals glances toward the window of the ground floor apartment opposite, where the young painter lives.
What is the unhappiest life? It is [that of] that rich man of twenty-five years who lives opposite on the first floor.
Is one equally old if one is thirty summers old or thirty winters.—JP V 5661 (Pap. IV B 140) n.d., 1843
Deleted from journal:
May 17
If I had had faith, I would have stayed with Regine.11 [IV A 107 41] Thanks to God, I now see that. I have been on the point of losing my mind these days. Humanly speaking, I was fair to her; perhaps I should never have become engaged, but from that moment I treated her honestly. In an esthetic and chivalrous sense, I have loved her far more than she has loved me, [IV A 107 42] for otherwise she would neither have treated me proudly nor unnerved me later with her pleas. I have just begun a story titled ‘”Guilty?/’Not Guilty?’”;12 of course it would come to contain things that could amaze the world, for I have personally experienced more poetry in the last year and a half than [is contained in] all novels put together, but I cannot and will not do it, for my relationship to her must not become poetically diffused; it has a completely different reality [Realitet]. She has not become a kind of theatrical princess;* so, if possible, she will become my wife. Lord God, that was my only wish, and yet I had to deny myself that. Humanly speaking, in doing that I was perfectly right and acted most nobly toward her by not letting her suspect my agony. In a purely esthetic sense I was generous. I dare congratulate myself for doing what few in my place would do, for if I had not thought so much of her welfare, I could have taken her, since she herself pleaded that I do it (which she surely should never have done; it was a false weapon), since her father asked me to do it; I could have done a kindness to her and fulfilled my own wish, and then if in time she had become weary, I could have castigated her by showing that she herself had insisted on it. That I did not do. God is my witness that it was my only wish; God is my witness how I have kept watch over myself lest any memory of her be effaced. I do not believe that I have spoken to any young girl since that time. I thought that every rascal who happened to be engaged regarded me as a second-rate person, a villain. I have done my age a service, for in truth it was certainly [here some illegible words].