Clare Kauter - Sled Head (Damned, Girl! Book 2)

by Unknown

  “Ah,” she said, nodding. “And you wanted to ask me about the elves?”

  “Yes,” I said. “I know that elves are creatures of the light, and –”

  “Being a creature of the light doesn’t automatically make someone good, just as being a creature of the dark doesn’t necessarily make someone bad.” She paused, giving me a meaningful look. If only I could have gotten rid of Henry I could ask what the hell she meant by that.

  “So you mean…”

  “I mean watch your back.”

  Great. Evil Santa came with evil elves. I was never going to feel the same about Christmas again.

  “I don’t suppose you have any idea how to go about finding Santa?” I asked.

  She reached around behind her and grabbed for something I couldn’t see. (This spiritual Skype projected her clearly, but her surroundings were a little too dark to see.) Turning back to face me, she held up a small red orb. “This should help,” she said, and blew on it. It lifted gently off her hand and flew towards me, as some point crossing the wall between the ethereal and corporeal realm. I caught it. It burned in my hand and I felt a strong pull, leading me (presumably) towards Santa and his elves.

  “Thank you,” I said, staring down at the glowing crystal. Its surface was smooth, although I could see a couple of imperfections running through it. The billowing mist inside it reminded me of the Doomstone – and, by extension, Ed. “And how are you?” I asked, wanting to take my mind off the subject.

  “Oh, good, good. Obviously we’re busy with the inquest, but –”

  “The inquest? What inquest?”

  Oh god, had someone discovered the bodies of those grabbers I’d killed? I thought they’d all been burned in that (ahem) mysterious bushfire?

  She sighed. “Into the handling of the whole Doomstone debacle.”

  Argh, of course. Ed again. He’d screwed everyone over. “But surely you’re not going to get into trouble for that, right? I mean, it was obviously not your fault.”

  She shrugged. “We’ll see, I guess. Anyway, I’d better go. Nice to see you, Nessa. You too Henry. And, uh, startled onlookers. Good luck finding Santa.”

  “Thanks, Daisy,” I said as the flames flickered, spluttered and died, just like my hopes of finding out anything about myself over the course of that conversation.

  The group dispersed, chattering excitedly about the séance, and Henry and I wandered back into the village. “I think we should get camping supplies and head out on foot immediately,” said Henry. “It’ll get dark soon – day doesn’t last long out here.”

  “Sorry, did you just say ‘on foot’ and ‘camping’ in the same sentence?” I asked. “No way. We are finding a magical supplies store and putting our séance money to good use.”

  Given that the village consisted of a single street, I wasn’t expecting too much from their magic shop. However, I was hoping since they obviously were a tourist town trading on the magical (Santa and his elves, for example), they might have a small selection of goods. What we found, however, wasn’t exactly what I had in mind.

  A discount store of magical knick-knacks.

  “Right. I don’t know about you, but the ‘crystal’ orbs made from plastic don’t exactly fill me with confidence,” said Henry. “If we buy supplies from here, they’re going to kill us.”

  I had been distracted by a nearby bargain table. “Henry, look! Self-cleaning cauldrons!” I looked inside and saw that the pot seemed to be oozing some sort of green goo. I sat it back down. “Uh, maybe not.”

  Next I moved over to a stand of enchanted Christmas decorations. There were angels for the top of the Christmas tree that would sing carols to passers-by (although, to be honest, their tinny voices left a lot to be desired) and miniature reindeer flying around pulling a sleigh – although judging by the number of things they were running into in the shop, I don’t think I’d want to set them loose in my house. I was messy enough without that added factor.

  “What were you hoping we’d find?” asked Henry.

  “Supplies,” I replied, somewhat ambiguously. OK, so I wasn’t sure what I was looking for. Something to make our journey easier. A magic carpet, maybe or a…

  Henry realised what I was eyeing off and went into panic mode. “No. No way. That is the most horrendously dangerous idea you’ve ever had.”

  I frowned. Henry was more than a little bit wrong about that, but I thought it best not to correct him. “Come on,” I said. “It’s not like you’ll have to use it, anyway. You can just shift.”

  “I’m not letting you get on that thing.”

  “Fine. What exactly is the alternative, then? Do you want me to ride you?”

  We made eye contact at that point and my eyes widened in realisation of what I’d just said. Henry looked equally as shocked. We both stared at the floor and mumbled boring things about how nice the wooden boards were and looked intently at things on nearby stands and just generally made innocuous conversation as we waited for the awkward moment to pass.

  Eventually, I felt my face cool and knew I’d returned to my usual colour.

  “I’m buying it, Henry,” I said. “You can’t stop me.”

  He looked unimpressed, but seemed to realise that arguing would be futile.

  “Fine,” he said. “Buy it and let’s go.”

  I made my way to the counter, picking up a portable campfire-in-a-jar on the way. After I made my purchases, we headed to an outdoor-supplies shop down the road for camping gear. Once we were all done, Henry shifted into a bat (which personally wouldn’t have been my first choice of flying creature, but whatever – he was a bit of an oddball) and I mounted my brand new (and possibly hugely unreliable) discount shop flying broomstick.

  “Let’s go,” I said, pushing off from the ground. So far, so good. The ride was a little wobbly, but that was probably due to my lack of experience rather than being any fault with the broom. At least, that’s what I told myself. (I hadn’t bothered mentioning to Henry that this was my first time on a broom – I didn’t want to stress him out any further.)

  “I hate flying,” Henry whined.

  The wind was icy at this height, but the temperature was freezing at any altitude so I just gritted my teeth and got on with it. At least it would be over quicker this way. I was holding the red stone that Daisy had given my in my hand, allowing it to pull the broom along in whatever direction it wished as Henry flew alongside me. The trees beneath us fell away, and suddenly we were flying over open water.

  OK, maybe this is good. I won’t hit the ground if I fall off, I told myself. No, I’ll just fall into freezing water and either drown, die from the cold or be mauled to death by a Greenland shark. (OK, maybe I’d been watching too much ‘River Monsters’, but it was a possibility, right?)

  We flew on in silence for a while, Henry concentrating on not squealing in terror and me concentrating on keeping a grip on the broom despite my frozen hands. It was all relatively uneventful.

  That is, until my broom started to drop.

  I screamed.

  The broom stopped dropping. It had only fallen about five metres, but that was enough to make my stomach lurch.

  “What happened?” asked Henry worriedly.

  “I don’t – AAAAARGH!” I screamed as it began to drop again. This time there was no sign of it stopping. Henry didn’t have a hope of catching up to me and shifting into something that could save me in time. I was going into the water in five, four, three… I took a deep breath.

  And plunged into the icy depths.

  Chapter Five

  “Fuck!” I screamed as I broke the surface. “Shit shit shit!”

  I had never been that cold in my life. It felt as if the water were stabbing me all over with a thousand knives (or, rather, icicles). My whole body ached, and I could feel myself seizing up. I let go of the broom and it disappeared in the waves. My clothes had become so soaked with water that I was worried that even if Henry transformed into a dragon to lift me out I’d sti
ll be too heavy. (Even as a dragon, I couldn’t see Henry being all that strong. I’m pretty sure he spent most of his time as a gorilla just to make people think he was a big guy, but everyone could see through that.)

  “H-help,” I stammered through chattering teeth.

  “Um, Nessa, I don’t mean to alarm you,” Henry said, looking behind me, panic written all over his face. “But, uh, we aren’t alone.”

  Oh, great. The Greenland sharks were coming for me. Well, that just did it. I turned to give them a piece of my mind – who cared if they couldn’t understand me? – and stopped dead.

  There in front of me was a group of five huge black fins protruding from the water. The smallest one was more than a metre high. I gulped. The animals shifted so their heads were poking out of the water.

  Orcas.

  “Uh, hi,” I said. No one had every been attacked by an orca in the wild, I told myself. They’re basically puppies. Big, toothy puppies.

  “Hi yourself,” said one of the orcas. “You lost?”

  Oh, OK. So orcas speak. Cool, alright. No need to panic. No need at all. Deep breathing.

  “F-fell off my broom,” I stuttered.

  “We saw,” said another orca. “Thought you might need a ride.”

  “Thank you! Oh my goodness, that would be amazing.”

  I clambered onto the back of one of the larger orcas, who swum underneath me to make it easy for me to climb on even with my saturated clothing. I didn’t feel much warmer even out of the water, and I was still a little worried that I might freeze to death out here.

  “You got magic?” asked one of the orcas. I nodded. He paused as if waiting for something. I didn’t know what he meant. “Reckon you should use it to dry your clothes out, then.”

  “Oh, right. Yeah. Thanks.” Face palm.

  Using a warming spell, I heated my body temperature back to above zero and thawed out my frozen clothes (literally frozen), before drying them. I was a little weak from the swimming/being frozen/nearly dying, so the orcas shot some magic my way. Of course, I realised. They’re wereorcas.

  “Is your shifter buddy OK?” whispered the orca whose back I was perched on.

  I looked over at Henry, still in bat form, hanging in mid-air, terrified. I sighed. “Don’t mind him. He’s scared of everything.”

  “He’s probably just heard some rumours about us,” said one of the other orcas. “About some of the actions of the more… extreme members of the movement.”

  “The movement?”

  “Empty the tanks,” explained another orca, this one a female.

  “Right, of course,” I said. Weres and shifters were usually very vocal animal rights activists, for obvious reasons. “What kind of actions?”

  “Oh, nothing to worry about. Where can we take you? I’m Dave, by the way,” said the orca I was sitting upon. The abrupt change of subject did not go unnoticed by me, but I decided to let it go. I agreed with the sentiments of the ‘empty the tanks’ movement, and besides, who was I to judge other people’s actions? I was on my way to slaughter Santa.

  “I’m Nessa,” I said. “And the shifter’s name is Henry.”

  We went around the circle of orcas and I met Nina, Keiko, Josh and MacGyver.

  “And where would you like a lift to?”

  “Well, if it’s no trouble –”

  “None at all,” Nina assured me.

  “Well, I actually have a seeking stone.”

  They all nodded. “Right,” said Dave. “You give me directions, then.”

  “OK,” I said. “Uh, straight ahead.”

  That was the only direction I gave.

  Henry was oddly silent throughout the trip, barely saying a word the whole time we swam across the ocean. They invited him to shift into an orca and swim with them, which he refused. He didn’t even join in when we were singing rounds. I wondered why he was being so rude. Wereorcas weren’t like werewolves, as far as I knew. From what I heard they were very smart and generally had a good reputation. Besides, I thought Henry would agree with the ‘empty the tanks’ thing.

  Eventually we arrived at another icy landmass where we had to part with our newfound pod of friends. I stood on the shore saying goodbye to the weres while Henry flapped away beside me.

  “Goodbye!” I called. “If you’re ever passing Watergrove Beach, sing out! I live in the dodgy-looking dilapidated shack!”

  “Will do!” called Dave. “Happy travels!”

  And with that, they resubmerged and swam away.

  I turned to Henry. “What was that all about? Why were you so scared of them? They were lovely! They saved my life!”

  “Do you have any idea what they were doing out there?”

  I shrugged. “Going for a swim? Orcas do that.”

  “They’re baiting.”

  I sighed and rolled my eyes. “What are you talking about?”

  “They’re baiting whalers and capturers. People going after real orcas.”

  I frowned. “You mean like a bait and switch?”

  “I mean like a bait and maul to death.”

  “Wow,” I said quietly. I was silent for a moment.

  “Exactly.”

  “That’s brilliant.”

  Henry frowned. “Um, it’s not brilliant, actually. It’s hugely unethical – not to mention illegal – and –”

  I raised my eyebrows. “Oh, you mean like murdering Santa would be?”

  “He deserves it!”

  “So do the whalers!”

  “I – well, yes, I suppose… But those wereorcas are still dangerous!”

  “Not to us.”

  Henry sighed. “Yes, well… I guess you’re right.”

  “Excellent. Then next time we meet them, you can apologise.”

  “I can’t be seen fraternising with criminals!” he hissed. “I’m a Department official!”

  I groaned. “You’re so uptight, Henry. Learn to live a little.”

  We trudged through the snow, Henry back in wolf form. He was silent, still mad at me for calling him uptight, as he stalked along beside me. It was already dark – it was almost always dark here – but we pushed on anyway. If we only moved during daylight hours, we weren’t going to make progress very quickly. We were in another forest, almost identical to the one back on the other landmass. (I still had no idea where we were geographically, but I trusted the stone to lead us on our way.) Eventually, we reached a clearing and decided to stop and set up camp.

  “I can’t believe we have to camp,” I grumbled. Henry had shifted into a gorilla to help put up the tent.

  “How instead of just standing there complaining, you go and find some firewood?”

  I reached into my bag and pulled out the portable campfire in a jar that I’d got from the occult $2 shop. I shook it, just like it said on the label.

  “That is not going to – ”

  The fire roared to life inside the jar and I sat it on the ground, impressed by how well it seemed to heat up the area while the jar itself was barely warm to the touch.

  I poked my tongue out at naysayer Henry. He rolled his eyes at me and got back to constructing the tent. Not that I was planning on telling Henry, but he was right – the fire hadn’t worked. I’d charged it with my own energy. He didn’t need to know that, though.

  By the time Henry finished putting up the tent roughly three hours later (I guess he wasn’t an outdoorsy type either), I was more than read for bed. I crawled into the tent, clutching my portable fire, and hopped into a sleeping bag, still fully clothed. OK, so I wasn’t that comfortable, but at least I was warm. That was until I sensed something moving outside the tent and my blood ran cold. I turned to Henry and saw that he had sensed it too.

  Outside, surrounding the tent, were fifty – at least – tiny little pockets of energy. My guess was that those pockets of energy were in the form of ice elves, and they weren’t too happy to see a shifter and a – well, a whatever – on their land.

  “What do we do?” I hissed. />
  “Negotiate,” said Henry, looking green, which was quite a feat for a gorilla. “I’ll go out and – ”

  There was a whooshing sound and Henry and I both dropped from our seated positions to flat to the ground. An arrow fashioned from ice-fire pierced the air where our heads had been moments before.

  “I think we’re beyond negotiating,” I said. I looked up to the ceiling. “Satan, now would be a really great time to send the Reaper to help us.” At the very least, he could help with the clean up.

  There was no reply. She was probably busy working on her marketing campaign. I vaguely remembered her saying that she had a magazine interview at some point this week. Just my luck that it would be now.

  More arrows flew overhead, decimating the canvas sides of our tent and leaving blue flames burning where they’d broken through. We weren’t safe in here. We had to get outside, not that out there was going to be any safer. I grabbed Henry’s hands and we threw up a quick ward. I charged with as much magic as I could muster and watched his eyes grow wide. He knew how much power I contained now. My stomach filled with dread. Even if we lived through this, I would have to explain my magic to Henry and deal with The Department examining my every move.

  The ward blocked the arrows as Henry and I moved outside, back-to-back, ready to fight. I’d given away the game now, so I didn’t bother holding back. The arrows were coming thick and fast, glancing off the ward, and if I didn’t do something quickly they were going to pierce the bubble of protection Henry and I had cast around ourselves. I sighed. I figured Henry had already seen my magic potential. Now it was time for him to witness my crazy purple death ray. I cracked my neck and crouched slightly, ready to cast, when suddenly –

  All the arrows stopped.

  “What –” I began to ask, before noticing that Henry had collapsed to the ground. Despite the portable fire, things had begun to grow very cold. It was just like last night at the inn… The same creature was approaching us. I looked around at the elves, and although I couldn’t see them very well in the dark, I could hear a murmur of panic. But that couldn’t be right – if it were Santa coming our way, surely they wouldn’t be worried. They’d be used to his weird ‘light magic void’ thing, right? Come to think of it, Krampus probably wouldn’t use the void on his own warriors. Which meant…