Journey from Darkness

by Gareth Crocker

  It was not from South Africa.

  As if for some reason it needed to be handled with care, he took his time opening it.

  Inside was a small photograph.

  It was an image of an enormous elephant and her calf wading through a lake, the limbs of a glorious tree flanking the picture.

  As he turned it over, he saw there was a short message written on the back.

  How do you thank a man for giving you back your life?

  Morgan glanced up from the newspaper and noticed the confused look on Noah’s face. ‘What is it?’

  Noah frowned and shook his head. As his eyes again drifted over the words, he felt a coldness rush through his fingers. He watched, as if separated from himself, as the photograph slipped from his fingers and cartwheeled to the floor. Before he even knew what he was doing, he was up from his chair and running to the cell. He snatched the keys off his belt, unlocked the gate, and threw it open. Without uttering a word, he stepped inside, pulled Derek into a sitting position and then ripped open the front of his shirt. He was looking for the elephant tattoo on his chest, the one he had seen on the day of their accident.

  A tattoo that was no longer there.

  Noah felt his mouth open. ‘Who the hell are you?’

  The man stared back at him and then slowly rose to his feet. The haunted expression that for days had plagued him, lifted.

  ‘We all have our secrets, Detective.’

  Noah grabbed him by the shoulders and drove him into the wall. ‘I asked you a goddamn question! Who are you?’

  ‘My name,’ he whispered, and then took a deep breath as if cleansing his body of a great untruth, ‘is Edward Hughes.’

  65

  ‘You’re brothers … twins …’ Noah said, almost choking on the words. ‘That’s it, isn’t it?

  Edward nodded, but volunteered nothing further.

  ‘That’s why you looked so thin! Why you seemed a different person … because you are a different person,’ he whispered. ‘How did you do this?’

  Edward locked eyes with Noah and then slowly sat down on his bunk. ‘Derek left me a letter explaining everything. The murders, the confession … even that you would be waiting for him at the border.’

  Noah blinked as the information hit home. ‘So you went ahead of him? So that I would think you were him?’

  Edward nodded again. ‘And it worked.’

  ‘That’s also why there was no elephant,’ Noah continued, piecing the story together. ‘You never lost track of her. She was with Derek all along.’

  ‘Yes.’

  Another hesitation. ‘How far was he behind you?’

  ‘Maybe half a day. A couple of hours. I don’t really know.’

  ‘That’s why you were there at dawn. You didn’t want to run the chance of arriving at the same time as him.’

  Edward allowed Noah to work out the rest for himself.

  ‘So when he reached the border and we weren’t there to arrest him, he thought we’d decided not to come. That we had allowed him to pass.’

  Morgan closed his eyes as it all came crashing together. ‘So Derek knows nothing about this?’

  ‘He thinks you let him go. I presume that’s what the envelope was about.’

  ‘He doesn’t know what you’ve done,’ Noah declared numbly.

  ‘No. He’s waiting for me over the border and, by now, is probably wondering why I haven’t arrived yet.’

  Noah leaned against the bars of the cell, his head reeling. ‘That’s why you became so quiet. When we were speaking about the investigation you didn’t want to let on that you really didn’t know any of the details. So you acted like there was something wrong with you.’

  ‘It’s all I could think to do.’

  ‘What was your plan after this?’

  ‘Apart from allowing Derek to cross over the border, there was no plan.’

  ‘When were you going to reveal your identity?’

  ‘In court. Once I’d seen a lawyer.’

  ‘So you did all this to protect Derek?’

  Edward frowned at Noah’s disbelieving tone. ‘Of course. He’s my brother.’

  Having being betrayed and made a fool of for the second time in a matter of days, Noah’s eyes suddenly narrowed with anger. ‘You realise you’re in serious trouble here?’

  ‘Maybe, but what choice did I have? What would you have done if it was your brother?’

  ‘What choice did you have? How about letting your brother face up to what he’s done? How about staying the hell out of this?’

  ‘As I said, he’s my brother.’

  ‘Who murdered two men.’

  ‘Who maimed and butchered with impunity.’

  ‘That’s for the law to decide.’

  ‘Really? If Derek had followed the law you’d both be dead.’

  ‘That’s not the–’

  ‘Get your head out of your ass! Don’t you get it? He saved you. Both of you.’

  Furious, Noah stepped forward. ‘You expect me to stand here and be lectured to by the likes of you?’

  ‘Frankly, I don’t care what you do.’

  ‘You’re going to face jail time for what you’ve done. Do you care about that?’

  ‘Really? The way I see it, you’ve arrested the wrong man. This is a simple case of mistaken identity. You’ll be lucky if I don’t press charges against you.’

  Noah laughed. ‘You’re dreaming.’

  Edward glared back at him. ‘If I have to go to prison for this, it’ll be wrong, but I’ll accept it.’

  ‘I don’t think there’s any doubt about it. You can’t do what you’ve done and not expect repercussions.’

  ‘Sounds like the same old song, Detective,’ Edward sighed. ‘I’m guessing you never served actively in the war.’

  Noah folded his arms, but said nothing.

  ‘Well, I did. And so did Derek. And do you know what the law compelled us to do? Kill as many men as we could manage. The law wanted us to murder. Hell, it demanded death. I could slit a boy’s throat and the law would smile at me, want to shake my hand. If I slit enough throats, it would pin a medal on my chest. So you take your precious law and shove it up your ass, Detective. The really tragic thing here is that by the time you realise you’re wrong about this – and it’ll happen – it will all be too late. Innocent people will already have suffered for your ignorance.’

  ‘Innocent people like your brother?’

  ‘That’s right.’

  ‘Do you know that your brother shot the one victim in his face? And that was just for starters. He led his other victim into a gin trap and then gave him the option of being eaten alive or sawing off his own leg. I suppose the word innocent is open to interpretation.’

  If Edward was surprised by how Derek had killed the men, he did not show it. ‘Sometimes violence is justified.’

  ‘That’s exactly what I would expect you to say.’

  ‘Go to hell.’

  Noah took a breath and then turned to Morgan. ‘Lock this cell. Nothing’s changed. Only the prisoner’s crimes are different.’

  As Morgan stepped forward to lock the gate, Edward lay back down on the bunk. ‘If Derek had followed your little policeman’s handbook, you would have been nailed to a cross by now. Think about that, Detective.’

  66

  For the first time in his life, Noah failed to arrive for work. First for a day. Then another. Then one more. Morgan had twice gone out to his house to look for him, but on both occasions had returned empty-handed. By the end of the week, he was convinced something had happened to him. He began asking around town, to find out if anyone had seen Noah or even heard from him, but nobody had. He checked both the hospital and the two small clinics in the area and even took a drive out of town to see if he was perhaps holed up in his father’s old farmhouse. But there was no trace of him. Nobody had seen or even heard from him in days. Without so much as a single word, Noah had simply vanished. Either something had happened to him or, for rea
sons that were not yet clear, he did not want to be found. The more Morgan thought about it, the more he realised that something untoward must have happened to him. He could not think of anything that would cause Noah to walk away from his job without so much as a word of explanation. Desertion was just not in his nature.

  ‘Still no sign?’ Edward asked as Morgan entered the station.

  ‘None. Not a soul’s seen or heard from him.’

  ‘Did you get into his place?’

  Morgan nodded and dropped his keys onto the table. ‘All his personal stuff is still there. His books, clothes, everything.’

  ‘And he’s never done anything like this before?’

  ‘I’ve never even beaten him to the station. He’s never late. He even works on weekends. Probably Christmas as well.’

  ‘Maybe you’re missing something. What about a bender? Does he drink?’

  ‘Sure. Coffee.’

  Edward nodded, knowing full well that Noah was unlikely to have any real vices. ‘Have you checked your desk again for a note?’

  ‘Of course.’

  ‘Maybe it fell on the floor.’

  ‘It’s not on the floor, Edward. Besides, nothing would keep him away from this place for this long. I can’t even remember him taking time off for a holiday. If you haven’t already worked it out, this place means everything to him. It’s his entire life.’

  Edward was feeling increasingly guilty about his last conversation with the detective. Despite their disagreement, the truth was he liked Noah a great deal. As Derek had suggested, they had much in common. ‘Have you checked the hospitals?’

  ‘There’s only one. And yes, of course.’

  ‘Does he have any enemies in town?’

  ‘None that I can think of.’

  ‘What about prison? Maybe he put someone away who has now been released and is looking to scratch an old itch.’

  Morgan was about to sit down when he stopped, hovering above his chair. ‘That’s not impossible.’ He paused. ‘There was one guy. A real piece of shit who raped two women and put his wife in hospital when she tried to stop him.’

  ‘What? How did the wife happen to be there?’

  ‘He was raping her daughters. As I said, a real piece of shit. The guy was mad as hell when Noah brought him down. He promised to slit his throat when he got out.’

  ‘How long was his sentence?’

  ‘A couple of years … a couple of years ago.’

  ‘Where?’

  ‘Lamontville. It’s a small jail just outside Johannesburg.’

  Before Edward could even suggest it, Morgan was reaching for the phone.

  67

  Derek was bathing in the vast lake barely yards away from Shawu and her calf when he noticed a lone figure approaching through the early-morning sun. ‘It’s about time,’ he whispered to himself, a broad smile spilling onto his cheeks. Still lathered in soap, and not bothering to rinse himself off, he clambered out the water and scrambled for the bank. He had been expecting Edward for days now and was becoming concerned that something had happened to him. He hurried into his trousers, grabbed his boots and, while stumbling into a run, managed to slip them on. As his arms flashed at his side, the cool morning air rushing over his wet skin, his emotions prickled to the surface. Edward’s arrival was more than just a reunion, it marked the true end of Shawu’s journey and the fulfilment of something extraordinary. Something that somehow seemed both to add to, and provide an ending to, their father’s story.

  Derek suddenly felt both rejuvenated and blessed, as privileged as any man who ever had cause to run. But as his eyes lifted once more to the horizon, straining in the bright face of the sun, he realised something peculiar.

  Edward was still only walking.

  Why? he wondered. Was there bad news? And if so, what could it possibly be? Surely Edward could see him running? Why had he not responded in turn?

  And then, feeling the weight of a stone in his stomach, it all made sense.

  Edward would have been running. Which could only mean one thing: The man in the distance was not his brother.

  Cupping his hands over his eyes, he squinted towards the horizon once more.

  When he finally saw who it was, he slowed to a walk and then drew to a halt.

  As the man closed the gap, Derek reached for something to say, fumbling for the gossamer slip of a few words, but found none.

  ‘These pans are something else,’ Noah remarked, stopping in front of him. ‘So much larger than you’d imagine. The articles don’t do them justice.’

  Derek felt his head nod.

  ‘Is that her? And her child?’ he asked, glancing over Derek’s shoulder.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘She’s extraordinary. Truly,’ Noah said, and then slipped his hands into his pockets as if theirs was a casual exchange between passersby.

  ‘How did you find me, Noah?’

  ‘I track people for a living, Derek. Turns out it’s even easier to track an elephant.’

  ‘You followed me here … on foot?’

  A nod. ‘I wanted to feel some of what you feel.’

  ‘Why?’

  Noah thought for a moment, his face blank. ‘Because I don’t understand enough about you, enough about what you did.’

  ‘Noah, I don’t really know what to say. You obviously got my letter?’

  ‘I did.’

  ‘I wish there was something more I could do to thank you for letting me go–’

  ‘Tell me something,’ he interrupted, a faraway look now in his eyes. ‘Why are her tusks so long?’

  Derek did not know what to make of the sudden change in subject. ‘She’s a Desert Elephant. Up until this year, there hasn’t been a recorded sighting of one in decades. Many people don’t even believe they’re real.’

  ‘She was part of a herd, wasn’t she?’ he said quietly. ‘The ones we found in the river.’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Which Xavier and his brother butchered?’

  Derek nodded.

  As Noah watched Shawu and her calf wade across the lake, Derek could no longer bear it. ‘Noah, forgive me. I’m very pleased to see you again. But why are you here?’

  The detective looked back at him and, for the first time, a spark of emotion flared in his eyes. It was neither anger nor satisfaction. It was something else. ‘I’m searching.’

  ‘For what?’

  ‘The truth. Answers.’

  ‘Answers?’

  ‘Uh-huh. I’m trying to work out some things.’

  ‘About what?’

  ‘You … the killings … your brother.’

  Derek’s eyes widened at the reference to Edward. ‘My brother? What do you know about him?’

  ‘Quite a lot, as it turns out. I know he’s your twin. That he has the same mind as you, the same eyes as you, just without the anger. He’s really you without the sharp edges. And, as it turns out, without the elephant tattoo on his chest.’

  ‘The tattoo? I don’t understand. How do you even know about him?’

  ‘Because, Derek, I was there in the river that day, waiting for you. The only reason you weren’t intercepted is because your brother arrived a few hours before you did. He assumed your identity and told us he’d lost touch with the elephant. We arrested him because we thought he was you. He’s quite the actor.’

  For a moment, Derek was unable to speak. ‘No, that can’t be … It can’t! How would he even know to do that–’ he began, but then remembered the letter he had left for him. ‘Oh no, no …’

  ‘You can imagine my surprise last week when I received a photograph from you, from this place,’ Noah continued, spreading his arms, ‘when I thought you were sitting in a cell ten feet away from me.’

  ‘Edward’s in jail?’

  Noah nodded. ‘Of course.’

  Derek felt his mouth turn dry. ‘So what is this? What happens now?’

  ‘That depends.’

  ‘On what?’

  ‘What
you decide to do next.’

  ‘What are you saying?’

  Noah held on for a moment. ‘I’m proposing an exchange. Come back with me and I’ll let your brother go. All charges against him will be dropped.’

  ‘I’ll do it,’ Derek replied immediately. ‘Just give me your word that you’ll let him go.’

  ‘Done. You have it.’

  Derek looked back at Shawu, his head feeling light and then heavy all at once. Everything was happening so fast. Questions swirled, battered his mind. ‘W–When do you want to go?’

  ‘Right now.’

  ‘You want us to walk back?’

  ‘To the border. That’s where I left my truck.’

  ‘But,’ Derek argued, trying to get a grip on their conversation. ‘It’s days away.’

  ‘I know. I just did it,’ he said, and then gestured to the bag on his back.

  Derek looked down at the ground and then lifted his gaze to Shawu. His mind was in freefall. ‘You know, when I arrived at the border and you weren’t there, I couldn’t believe it. Based on everything I knew about you, I just couldn’t see you letting me through. I couldn’t imagine how you would allow me to pass.’

  ‘That’s because,’ Noah replied, turning and walking away, ‘I never did.’

  68

  For days they trudged towards the border in almost complete silence.

  Derek used the time to relive long stretches of his journey with Shawu. Breathless vistas overlapped with bursts of fire and storms, flashes of lions and swollen moons. Stars flickered between sunsets and sunrises; sounds and smells danced like lovers, entwining and embracing as one. The more he dwelled on the memories, the more it felt as if they had been pried from someone else’s mind. It seemed impossible that they belonged to him. Just how could they? he thought. How could he have been lying in a frozen trench, grappling to stay alive, and then – as if time and the world itself was a door that could merely be stepped through – be granted the remarkable honour of embarking across the African bushveld in the shadow of an ancient Desert Elephant? An animal that existed more commonly in myth and in parable than in the light of day. It was plainly beyond his ability to reason.