Valley of Shadows and Stranger in the Shadows: Valley of ShadowsStranger in the Shadows

by Shirlee McCoy

  When she surfaced again, the room was silent but for the quiet beep and hum of machinery. Miranda’s pain crested and receded with every breath she took. She tried to open her eyes, but her lids seemed fused together, all her effort not producing even the slightest movement. Panic beat a hard fast rhythm in her chest, each beat of her heart only adding to the pain. She wanted to scream, but her vocal chords seemed paralyzed, her body refusing to respond to any of her commands. The slow beep of the machine accelerated and Miranda wondered if she’d die here, frozen in place, unable to call for help.

  A warm hand pressed against her forehead, the touch so comforting tears slipped from her eyes. If she were going to die, at least she wouldn’t be alone.

  “No more tears, babe. My heart is already broken enough.”

  Hawke. Miranda tried again to open her eyes, focusing on the gentle brush of his hands against her cheek. Finally she managed it, the effort making her queasy. The room was dimly lit, the television off, Hawke’s rugged face bent close to hers, the shadow of a beard covering his jaw.

  “There you are. I was wondering when I’d look in those beautiful eyes again.” He spoke quietly, setting a book down on the table and grabbing a cup with a straw sticking out of it. “Here. Take a sip.”

  She did, the icy water easing some of the burning in her throat, though it did little to ease her pain. “Thank you.”

  But more tears slipped out, sliding into her hair, dripping into her ears.

  “Shh.” Hawke wiped the tears away, his hand a butterfly kiss against her skin. “Are you in pain?”

  “Yes.”

  “Here. Press this and the pain will be gone before you know it.” He put her thumb over a small button.

  Miranda didn’t even ask what it was, or what it would do to her. She just wanted every breath to stop being agony.

  Within minutes the pain eased to a dull ache, her tense body finally relaxing.

  “There. You already look more comfortable.” Hawke brushed a hand along her shoulder and down her arm, gently cupping her hand in his. “Your sister said you woke earlier. Didn’t she tell you about the morphine pump?”

  “She was too busy telling me what an inconvenience I’ve been to her. Where is she? And Max? Isn’t he here, too?” Miranda’s throat was burning again, an aching dryness that she couldn’t ignore. “Can I have some more water?”

  He nodded, held the cup while she sipped again, his eyes silvery gray and filled with emotion Miranda couldn’t name. “Your family is at their hotel. I convinced them it would be for the best if they got some rest. Would you like me to call them? They’re close. It won’t take long for them to come.”

  She shook her head. “I’d like to see Max, but I can’t handle Lauren right now.”

  “You don’t have to handle anything, babe. I’ll handle it for you.” He spoke in smooth soothing tones designed to comfort and Miranda let herself be drawn into them, her muscles relaxing, her head easing back onto the pillow.

  “How is your brother?”

  “Simon is great. He’s been here several times and is anxious to thank you for saving his life.”

  “And Austin?”

  “He’s recovering from several gunshot wounds. He’ll live, but I’m not sure he’s going to be happy about it.”

  “Did he confess?”

  “Not at first, but once Jack threatened to hand him over to the Thai authorities, he was more willing to talk. He admitted that he’d been in the Wa’s pocket for years, almost from the day he’d arrived in Thailand. That he passed on information about me to Green.”

  “He must have known he’d eventually get caught.”

  “Maybe he did. Maybe he didn’t care. His cause was everything. He’d reconnected with his birth mother and her father years after he was adopted and was brought into his grandfather’s militant philosophy. When his grandfather died, Austin took up his cause. A few months after he arrived in Thailand, Sharee offered him big money to be the Wa’s informant. He agreed and has been sending money to Chechnya ever since.”

  “And Green? Liam?”

  “Both have been arrested. Neither will admit to anything, but there’s enough evidence to convict them.”

  “And Randy?”

  Hawke shook his head and squeezed her hand. “He’s disappeared. I don’t think he’ll ever be found.”

  “You think he’s dead?”

  “Yeah. I do. Liam and Green would have seen him as the weak link. Getting rid of him would have assured his silence.”

  “I hope you’re wrong. I hope he’s alive somewhere and that the police find him. I hate to think of him being murdered.”

  “Then don’t think about it. Think about getting better.” He brushed strands of hair from her cheek, his fingers lingering there.

  “I guess this means the police aren’t after you anymore. You’re finally in the clear. I’m so glad.”

  “I told you before you didn’t have to worry about me, but I think I’m starting to like it.” He smiled and Miranda’s heart filled with an emotion she didn’t want to name. One she hadn’t wanted to feel. But it was there, as real as the man sitting beside her, as real as the connection between them that had become stronger with each passing day, each passing moment.

  “Hawke—”

  He pressed a finger against her lips. “Enough talking for now. You’ve got to rest so you can heal.”

  “I’ve been resting for five days.”

  “Five days isn’t nearly long enough, babe. You almost died in Mae Hong Son. They airlifted you here once you were stabilized. Performed surgery to repair your lung. Had to go back in twice more to stop internal bleeding. It’s been a tough few days. Now that you’re awake, things are looking up. Let’s keep it that way.”

  “I don’t remember anything about what happened.” Except the pain. And Hawke. He seemed to be part of all her memories, all her thoughts, and having him here made the world seem much more right than it had when she’d opened her eyes to find Lauren. “But I know I’m glad you’re here.” The words slipped out and she didn’t wish them back.

  “And I’m glad you’re here.” Hawke leaned in, pressing a tender kiss to her lips. “I thought we were going to lose you.”

  “I guess I’m tougher than you thought.”

  “You’re exactly what I thought—a sweet, strong, funny woman who cares just a little too much about everyone. Meeting you has changed me, Miranda. For the better. I want you to know that.”

  He was going to say goodbye. Miranda knew it and she fought unwelcome tears at the thought. She’d known from the very beginning that they were from different worlds, that they had nothing in common. “Are you leaving now?”

  “Leaving? Babe, I’ll stay here for the rest of my life if you want me to.” He grinned, but there was a seriousness to his voice that made Miranda’s heart jump.

  “The rest of your life might be a long time.”

  “The rest of my life won’t be nearly long enough if I get to spend it with you.”

  “Hawke—”

  “I know this isn’t the time to discuss it, but every time you were wheeled into surgery, I prayed that God would give me the opportunity to tell you what an important part of my life you’ve become.”

  “I feel the same.”

  “Then maybe when you’re feeling better and finally get out of here, we can spend time doing what normal couples do—dinner, movies, walks on the beach.”

  “As opposed to running from drug dealers, racing through the jungle and getting shot?”

  “Exactly.”

  “I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.”

  Hawke smiled again, lifting her hand, kissing her knuckles, his lips warm against her flesh, his eyes promising all the thi
ngs she’d thought she’d never have. “Me, too. But first, healing. How’s the pain?”

  “Better. I can’t even tell where I was shot.” Miranda glanced down, trying to find bandages, but a blanket was pulled up to her shoulders and she could see nothing.

  “A few inches below your collarbone. The bullet missed your heart, but went through your lung and out your back. The doctors say you are very lucky to be alive. I say you are very blessed.”

  “A week ago, I’m not sure if I would have agreed. Now, I know you’re right. It was so hard to lose Justin. For a while I was sure God had turned His back on me. He didn’t, though. He was there for me. And He’ll keep being there. I know that now.”

  “I understand. I’ve spent ten years looking for justice only to realize that justice is for God to mete out. Not me. I’ve quit my job with the DEA and I’m selling my portion of the business to my brother. He plans to stay here.”

  “And you?”

  “I’m going to Virginia. My friend Noah told me a year ago that he had a job for me if I ever wanted one. I’ll be training service dogs.”

  “That’s wonderful.”

  “Yeah, it is. A new life. A new home. And something that appeals to me even more.”

  “What’s that?” Her heart thumped a slow, thick rhythm as she looked into his eyes.

  “I’ll only be a few hours away from a woman I can’t imagine living life without.”

  Miranda smiled, her eyes drifting closed, sleep wanting to steal her away again. A thought floated on the edge of dreams and she forced her eyes open, looked into Hawke’s eyes. “I’m getting tired of living in Essex.”

  “Are you?”

  “Yes. And I can open a bakery just about anywhere.”

  “Where are you thinking would be a good place?”

  “Somewhere close to you.”

  Hawke’s smile lit his face. He leaned toward her, gently pulling her into his arms and the emotion Miranda hadn’t wanted to name welled up inside, the word for it dancing through her head and in her heart until she couldn’t deny it any longer. “I love you, Hawke.”

  “You know what, babe? I love you, too.”

  Epilogue

  “You really don’t intend to live here?” Lauren’s voice was high pitched, her blue eyes, framed by stylish glasses, scanned the small living room she and Miranda were standing in.

  “Actually, I do.” Miranda lifted a box from the floor, wincing a little as the muscles in her chest and back pulled against scar tissue.

  “But it’s…” Lauren looked around the little bungalow Miranda had purchased a week after her return from Thailand. It had taken another few weeks to finalize the sale of her bakery to an employee who’d jumped at the chance to own it. The town house had also been easy to sell. Now, after a month of nervous anticipation, moving day had arrived. Unfortunately, Lauren had felt the need to be part of it and had followed Miranda’s Saturn and the moving truck and crew she’d hired, her Mercedes crammed with boxes of Miranda’s belongings.

  “It’s what?” Miranda glanced around the cozy room—the gleaming hardwood floors, the muted yellow paint, the windows that lined the front wall and looked out onto the blue-green water of Smith Mountain Lake.

  “Small. Old.”

  “I think it’s cute and homey.”

  “Which just shows how confused you are. Miranda, this is just a bad idea all around. You’ve fallen for a man who isn’t right for you. That’s bad enough. But to move hundreds of miles from home to be near him. That’s insane. Obviously you still haven’t recovered from your injury.”

  “The injury was to my lung, not my brain.” Miranda pulled a pile of books out of the box and placed them on one of the built-in bookshelves that flanked the fireplace. The clock on the mantel said twelve-thirty. When she’d spoken to Hawke the previous night, she’d told him she’d be at the house by noon. He’d said he would be there to meet her. She’d counted on it. Now disappointment beat a sullen pulse behind her eyes, the headache she’d been fighting off during the five-hour drive from Maryland slamming full-force through her skull.

  She pulled another pile of books from the box, shooting a look at her sister as she did so and gesturing toward the partially open front door. “Why don’t you head to the airport, Lauren? You wouldn’t want to miss your flight.”

  “I’ve got hours before it takes off. Besides, I’ve been thinking of canceling the photo shoot.”

  Miranda knew that wasn’t the truth, but she played the game anyway. “Why?”

  “Because you obviously need me here. I’d hoped that Max could leave his job for a week and come stay with you, but he just refused to take more time off.”

  “He refused because he’d already stayed with me in Essex for two weeks. I wanted him to get back to his life, so I told him I’d be fine on my own. And I am.” She dropped the empty box, lifted another one and froze as a short, sharp rap sounded on the door. It swung open the rest of the way, a tall, dark figure filling the doorway.

  “I knew if I was a few minutes late you’d get into trouble.” Hawke’s gravely voice was so familiar, so welcome, tears filled Miranda’s eyes.

  “I’m not getting into trouble. I’m unpacking.”

  “And I think that was exactly what I told you not to do.” He strode forward, took the box from her hands, a gentle smile softening the harsh planes and angles of his face. He’d left his hair down and it fell forward, brushing against Miranda’s skin as he leaned down to capture her lips in a searing kiss.

  “Excuse me, but you’re not alone, you know.” Lauren huffed the words and Miranda pulled back, her cheeks heating.

  She might have stepped away, but Hawke hooked an arm around her waist and pulled her close. “Do you see that comfortable-looking chair over there?” He pointed to the antique rocker that the movers had brought in a half hour ago. “I want you to sit there and relax while I take care of the rest of these boxes.”

  “We’re doing fine without you, Mr. Morran, and one more person in this room will only make it more claustrophobic. Feel free to leave and come back later after we’re done.” Lauren’s voice was icy cold, her expression haughty.

  “I invited Hawke here because I wanted him here, Lauren. And since this is my house, I think I get to decide who stays and who doesn’t.” Miranda leaned her aching head against Hawke’s shoulder and his arm tightened around her waist.

  Lauren stiffened, her back ramrod straight and her eyes slitted. “I went out of my way to help you today, Miranda. You act like you don’t appreciate it.”

  “Of course I do, but that’s beside the point. You’re being rude and you know it. If you can’t be more pleasant, you can leave.” Miranda’s heart broke as she spoke, her dreams of building a relationship with Lauren dying in the face of her sister’s inability to think of anyone but herself.

  “Obviously, you’ve decided you don’t need family now that he’s in your life.”

  “Hawke is the closest family I’ve ever had.”

  Lauren blinked and for a moment Miranda thought she’d soften. Then she shrugged, started across the room. “I’m sorry you feel that way. I guess I’ll leave you to your family.” She stepped outside, closing the door firmly behind her.

  “Lauren—”

  “Let her go, babe. One more word out of her mouth and I was going to throw her out anyway.” Hawke spoke quietly.

  “I know she’s obnoxious, but she’s my sister.”

  “And maybe one day she’ll realize it. How two such different women could come from the same family, I don’t know.” Hawke brushed a hand over Miranda’s hair, his fingers tangling in the strands and massaging the base of her neck. “You okay?”

  “Better than I was when I arrived and saw that you weren’t here.”

>   “Sorry about that, babe. I picked up a surprise for you on my way here and it wasn’t cooperating.”

  “A surprise?” Miranda smiled, easing away from Hawke’s arm and turning to face him, her fingers tracing the strong line of his jaw, the ridge of the scar on his cheek. “Did Simon finally decide to visit?”

  “Not yet. He’s planning to come out in November.”

  “Then what’s the surprise?”

  “Sit down and I’ll tell you.”

  “Bribery?”

  “Whatever works.”

  Miranda did as he asked, easing down onto the rocking chair and smiling up at him. “Okay. I did my part. What’s the surprise?”

  “It’s in the car. Wait here and I’ll bring it in.”

  He disappeared out the door and was back moments later, a wiggling, squirming bundle of fur in his arms, the big pink bow tied around its neck sliding and slipping as it moved.

  “A puppy!” Miranda reached for the little fur ball, laughing as it licked her chin. “She’s adorable. Oh, Hawke, thank you!”

  “I thought you might like some company when I couldn’t be here.”

  “You thought I needed a guard dog is more like it.” Miranda laughed again, reaching for Hawke’s hand, loving the way the solid warmth of it felt.

  “Does she look like a guard dog?”

  Miranda studied the puppy’s brown fur and dark face, her soulful eyes and wagging tail, the pink bow and the shiny gold ring hanging from one end of it.

  Shiny gold ring?

  Miranda’s breath caught in her throat, her hand shaking as she reached out to touch it. A marquis diamond flashed in the overhead light, reflecting all the colors of life, of hope, of dreams fulfilled.

  “My friend Noah said I should wait. He said it was too soon to ask you to marry me. But I don’t want to wait, babe. Not a year. Not two years. Not somebody else’s idea of what a reasonable amount of time is.” He knelt down in front of her, his eyes glowing with silver fire. “I love you now. I’ll love you tomorrow. I’ll love you an eternity from now. So, what do you say?”