Beyond: Book Four of the State Series

by M. J. Kaestli

  Her comprehension and motor skills for writing letters were probably average to the rest of the community. Her lack of knowledge or skill in the matter wasn’t the issue—nothing Miriam said seemed noteworthy. If a piece of information struck her as vital or complex, recording it in this archaic fashion couldn’t possibly aid her.

  All these thoughts passed through her mind in a flash, but her actions did not match her thoughts. Hope slid the paper towards her and dipped the quill in the pot of ink. Adah warned her about being difficult. Miriam had the most contact with her in the community. She would be the target of everyone’s inquiring minds. If Miriam wasn’t enthralled with Hope, she would have a continuous and abundant audience for her tales.

  “Yes, of course, Miriam. My mistake. Please proceed.”

  Miriam jutted out her chin and spoke again. Hope took notes, wasting the paper she knew she would never refer to.

  A glimmer had both ignited and been snuffed out so quickly. An idea of a possible future where the two of them were friends had danced around in her mind. The thought was no more. Miriam was the instructor and had grown rather accustomed to being the smartest female around.

  ***

  Miriam led Hope to the women’s home they were about to attend. It had been difficult for Hope to understand how to navigate around this town and remember where everyone lived. They built each house into the ground with a trap door to access the dwelling, making each space essentially look the same.

  Miriam crouched and gave a curt knock on the door before she opened the hatch and began her descent. This was Hope’s first house-call, stepping away from the security of the classroom where she would be expected to assist. It was a little awkward for her to do a house call for a woman she previously only knew by name. Miriam spoke of Ruth often in the classroom as this was a high-risk pregnancy. She had learned all there was to learn in theory but lacked any hands-on experience.

  “Hello, Ruth. How are you feeling today?”

  Ruth walked over to them in her pregnant waddle. “Hey, ya’ll.”

  “Ruth, this is my midwife in training, Hope. She will observe us during your checkup today.”

  “Oh, yes, Hope. You are the really smart girl who got lost and married Joshua. I know who you are.”

  Hope wasn’t quite sure what to say in response to her. She studied her for a moment as the horrible truth set in—Ruth was just a girl. Although this was the very reason Miriam had spent so much time speaking about Ruth’s tender age, seeing Ruth in the flesh made the severity of the situation real to her.

  “Yes. I suppose everyone has heard of me.”

  “Of course we have. No one thought Joshua would get a girl to marry him. He’s easy on the eyes but a hunter is every woman’s last choice for a husband. He kept getting passed over time and time again.”

  Hope wasn’t entirely sure how to respond. She had known of Joshua’s trouble in finding a wife yet openly discussing it made her uncomfortable. She loved him dearly, and it felt as though she had to defend her choices.

  “Oh, so you do realize he is ruggedly handsome. I thought the women in this community must be blind to pass him over.”

  Ruth giggled. “No, not blind. Just cautious.”

  Miriam had been rather vague in her explanation as to why being married to a hunter was frowned upon. The way he smelled of his kills wasn’t that repulsive. He always cleaned himself and his clothing when he was finished. As Ruth seemed keen on a little gossip during her checkup, Hope pressed her advantage. “Why is being a hunter considered less desirable when picking a mate?”

  Ruth giggled. “They say you talk funny.”

  “I suppose I do.”

  Ruth laughed again before she blurted her response. “Hunters get killed or hurt hunting more than any other kind of work. Hunters make the most widows. They tend to die young and leave women tending to babies all on their own. I wouldn’t want to take that chance, not if he hadn’t already captured my heart before I knew better.”

  Miriam looked at Hope uncomfortably and back at Ruth. Ruth was young and lacked any sort of tact when delivering such information. It was news to Hope, something she had never considered. She had never thought of his job as dangerous or more dangerous than others, but she had often wondered how no one had taken a shining to him.

  The soft smile on Hope’s face fell. Will this be my fate? Will he neglect to return home one evening just as I neglected to return to my people? Somehow, realizing she had already disappeared from her people made it more terrifying. There had to be someone or a group of people who mourned her loss. The reality was, she thought she was married before Joshua came along. It terrified her to think there was a man somewhere who loved her and thought she was dead. What if Joshua did the same thing to me?

  “Ruth, I’m going to have you lay back on the bed while we have a look at you.”

  She did as instructed. Ruth had been wearing a loose dress, and she lifted the fabric above her belly. Miriam pressed on different areas of her belly and ask her questions. Hope stood back and observed her in action, trying to shift her thoughts to the theory behind everything Miriam was doing.

  “So far, everything looks good. Your hips and pelvis are spreading nicely, which can be a concern with someone as young as you are.”

  “I know, I know. My momma taught me about how to avoid a baby till I was old enough but I didn’t listen.”

  Miriam stopped and looked at Ruth sternly. “Your momma just wanted what’s best for you. Our bodies aren’t meant to start making babies quite as young as you. I need to make sure you are getting enough rest and taking it easy. Babies tend to come early if your body hasn’t finished growing—they just aren’t ready to start growing people yet. I don’t want you to do any washing anymore and avoid lifting anything except your dinner fork. You need to get plenty of sleep, and I especially don’t want that husband of yours taking any liberties.”

  Ruth’s face flushed, but she nodded in agreement. “What happens if the baby comes early? It can’t come out before it’s done growin’, can it?”

  “Unfortunately, it can, and it might not make it if it does.” Miriam paused and let the gravity of the situation sink in. She continued with her examination for a moment, then stopped and looked Ruth directly in the eyes. “Did you lay with your husband this morning? Because it will be the last time till after this baby comes out.”

  Ruth’s face flushed once again, and she nodded to acknowledge the remark. She turned her attention to Hope as a means of distraction. “How you like it here so far?”

  “I like it just fine, thanks.”

  “How’s it different from where you come from? I hear your people are heathenistic savages and you almost don’t know how to speak proper.”

  Hope blinked rapidly before responding. When it came to speaking, she thought they were the ones who were a little grey on the rules. “I don’t know if I would say savages, but we don’t have the Bible or religion.”

  “No religion and you say they ain’t savages?”

  Hope shrugged. “It was peaceful enough there. People were kind and care about each other.” Hope couldn’t remember a specific person or how their society ran, but she felt an odd desire to defend them. She didn’t know for certain if they had religion or not but it didn’t ring a bell. There were certain concepts or objects that made sense to her and others her mind could hardly grasp. That was how she gauged what was similar or different between the two places. She knew something happened to hurt her and kill the people she was with, but she wasn’t sure if they were really bad. They may have disrespectfully abandoned the bodies, but she couldn’t conceive they ran around killing each other either. The people in this town seemed to think if it weren’t for Jesus everyone would commit murder for sport.

  “Well, that’s why you got lost. You left your place to look for food and you found Jesus instead. He always provides, you know.”

  Hope smiled and nodded. “Yes, he does.” She looked away, trying to find a
change of topic.

  “Well, we are sure happy to have you here. And now you is gonna help to bring more of God’s chosen people into the world. I see nothing but God’s love shining down on you. You are a true miracle.”

  “Yes.” Hope plastered a grin from ear to ear.

  “Alright. You, my dear, are finished for today. You make sure you leave all the work around here to someone else. We need to give that baby as much time to cook as possible.”

  “Will do, ma’am.”

  Hope smiled and nodded. “Nice to have met you.”

  They exited the home and walked to the next.

  “You will get used to everyone knowing your business.”

  Hope smiled. “You sure?”

  “Ruth is a sweet girl but not too bright. If she was, she wouldn’t have gotten herself pregnant to begin with. I don’t know why her parents consented to let her get married before seventeen.”

  “Do you think she will be okay? I mean, the baby.”

  Miriam grimaced. “Tough to say. I have seen some underage girls carry full term, but they are usually a bit brighter and listen to instructions better. I doubt she’s going to listen about her husband, or he won’t listen to her. Who knows, maybe she’ll just get bored and start cooking a giant pot of soup forgetting she isn’t supposed to lift anything. It’s more often people’s own stupidity which causes them grief than their circumstances.”

  Hope nodded. One of the first things she was taught in her training was how to track her cycle to plan to conceive or avoid pregnancy. Joshua told her God would send a baby when he saw fit, but she thought maybe she would let the first one come when it did, then put some thought into tracking her cycle after. Not every woman wanted to track or control their fertility, but she knew Ruth would have been taught explicitly to avoid a baby at her age. She could see why Miriam didn’t think she was too bright.

  “What now?”

  “We are going to another house to check on a woman who is due in two months. I’ll have you step forward and examine her before me and I’ll talk you through it. You need to get a hands-on feel for this sort of thing.”

  Hope gulped hard. She did not understand what kind of responsibilities she had before coming here, but she didn’t feel it would have had to do with human anatomy or getting into a close proximity of it.

  Chapter 13

  Joshua walked, dragging his cart. It was loaded high with hides and pelts. He had been drying the hides for some time, only focusing on hauling in the meat. The cart was cumbersome. It was such a large and awkward thing, poorly designed. There were two large wooden wheels on the wooden-framed cart. It was heavy, and the wheels were not properly round. It appeared the axle produced more friction than assistance. Hope wondered if he would do better to simply drag the items instead of fighting with the cart.

  He struggled through the long walk into the village where he unloaded the furs to the women who would work it into clothing and bags. Josh walked over to the supply tables and rummaged around.

  As she had yet to make friends, Hope wandered from the market. She walked along the greenhouses and saw sparks flying from Ruben’s hut. He was hunched over wearing a mask, holding a long tool to a chunk of metal. A small blue flame came from the tip and sparks were forming between the metal object and the flame. She couldn’t explain how she knew it, but they called what this man was doing welding. The moment she saw him, she somehow knew not only this word, but she also knew exactly how welding worked. After a few moments of observation, she realized she didn’t just know what this was, she could perform this task herself.

  The man lifted his helmet, wiped his brow and looked up at Hope. “Hello there. You look like you need something.”

  “If you can weld, why does my husband have wooden wheels on his cart?”

  He laughed at her question. “Well, knowing how to weld and having the metal to do it are two different things. Most people don’t want to go digging for the metals to make the tools. I use the limited materials I have to serve the community, not the individual.”

  “Where can I dig for it? Where does the metal come from?”

  “It’s not where it comes from, it’s where we find it. You dig up old things that were made of metal and melt it down.”

  “But what used to be made of metal? I know some of the trap doors are, but not much else. Why would people leave it sitting around if it is so valuable?”

  He looked at her funny for a moment. “They didn’t hunt for metal where you’re from?”

  She felt panic stir in her core. She avoided having conversations with members of the community which might expose her memory loss. Most people usually talked about the Bible or the last church service and so she didn’t have to worry about this. Most often she could be generic about her past but she was afraid she had gotten too specific this time.

  “I’m not sure. I don’t know if I ever asked where it came from. It was just there, and I used it as I needed it.”

  “Did they have people who went out to collect it every day? You must come from an area that was once greatly populated. We didn’t have much materials to re-work in these parts.”

  Her face flushed a little deeper. “I’m sorry, I guess I always took it for granted. Judging by my husband's cart, I thought no one here knew how to weld. The axle is worse than the wheels. I would have brought it up sooner but I only know how to weld, not to make a soldering iron.”

  His head jerked back at her remark. “You know how to weld? That’s a man's job.”

  She had to work to keep her facial expressions neutral. She didn’t understand what gender had to do with soldering ability, and she didn’t care to find out either. “Well, both men and women can do it where I come from. We don’t have jobs divided according to gender.”

  He smirked. “Can you show me?”

  She raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you believe me?”

  “No, nothing like that. I would just like to see you do it.” He stood. “There ain’t no one but me and my boy who know how to do this. I’m curious to see anyone do it other than us, but also to see if you do it differently. I’m from a long line of welders. Our family has taken care of all of that since this here town formed.”

  Her jaw dropped. “Isn’t that dangerous? What if something happened to your family? Suddenly, there would no longer be any such thing as welding. What if Miriam dies before she trained me or anyone else? What if this town forgot how to deliver babies?”

  He shook his head. “Don’t know what to tell you. People have been having babies long before midwives, and I don’t know who invented welding but I’m sure someone would figure out how to do it when the need arose. This is just the way it’s always been. How do your people do it differently? Do they learn everything instead of being specialized? Doesn’t that waste too much time in school instead of working? Did you do other things than weld?”

  She stepped closer to him and held out her hand for his helmet. She didn’t know how to answer his questions but if she started to weld then she could at least have time to think of something, or at least distract him.

  She slipped the helmet in place and grabbed the soldering iron from him. Taking the tool in her hand felt so natural, more natural than anything she had done since Joshua found her. Everything about this life had felt foreign to her as though she had lost her muscle memories more so than the images stored in her mind. She could have sworn she had never lifted a finger to prepare a meal before—something Joshua often grumbled about—nor did she understand anything about gardening or butchering meat or curling hair. What she seemed to know was how to fix things. How something could be constructed efficiently. She wanted to disassemble almost everything she saw which contained moving parts and build it into something better.

  After adjusting the iron, she hunched down and picked up where he had left off. Every single moment of the time she spent welding felt so easy and smooth to her. It was something she instinctively knew how to do but couldn’t explain it or instr
uct another in the craft. She continued working until the job was complete and stood up, handing the iron back to him.

  “Hot damn woman! You do know how to do this.” He leaned in a little closer, and then looked back at her. “This is better than my boy can do.”

  She wasn’t sure if she should thank him or explain herself.

  “What else can you do? What else did they train you in?”

  She shrugged. “I fixed old things and built some new.” As she said it, she knew it was the truth. She could weld, but she had a feeling she could do much more. She just needed to try a few more tasks to figure out what those things were.

  ***

  Hope tucked into bed with more space between herself and Joshua than normal. She wasn't certain if she should tell him about her experience with Reuben and the welding.