Control Freakz

by Evans, Michael

  Ethan paused, waiting for screams and cries in objection, but the crowd stayed silent, seemingly intent on hearing his last words.

  “I think it is only fair, being that I’m the only one who heard it, to share what that man, who goes by the name of Jacob, told me.” He paused again, swallowing down a bit of the anxiety and terror, that was beginning to coalesce in his mouth like a malignant tumor. All eyes were glued to Ethan, as they anticipated the bombshell accusation he was about to drop. “So Jacob told me the reason why he was looking for John, and it is pretty surprising. Apparently, John was in contact with leaders from other rebel groups. This caused our camp to be at risk for government attack, due to satellite communications being monitored by the Protection Services Agency.”

  Ethan stopped to walk closer to the crowd. “Jacob, said that he came here to remove John from power, because he was a threat to the organization and to our livelihood. After he heard that I had actually taken care of him, he was happy, and congratulated me.” Ethan paused, almost for the affect to let his words marinate into the minds of the crowd. “He then asked me if we needed a new leader, and I said that it was me. He then said he would be in contact with me, and got back in the helicopter and left.”

  Ethan finally closed his mouth, only to receive dozens of astonished looks from the crowd. For the first few seconds, there was an awkward silence, where no one knew quite how to react, but then my ears became overwhelmed with the cacophony of sound as everyone began either asking questions or arguing belligerently with each other.

  Hunter and I both exchanged glances, as Dulce stared forward silently at the pandemonium. My mind was still in shock that the guy, whose name was supposedly Jacob would say that. How could he be cool with Ethan killing one of his trusted leaders? Then my mind, had a second thought. What if Ethan is just lying about everything that Jacob told him?

  “Who said that you are our new leader? No one ever agreed to that.” Anna was already snapping back at Ethan.

  “No one objected to it when I announced it,” Ethan countered.

  “Because no one took you seriously. We all thought you were just some crazy lunatic, and now that we know that you are, we want you dead.” There was a coldness to her tone, and I could not pinpoint the exact location from which it originated. She was one of those truly nasty bitches, who always had an infinite number of grudges draped across her shoulders. I couldn’t even fathom the amount of pain and emotional torture she had been through to feel the need to inflict that much foulness on other people.

  “Anna, calm down.” It was Max, her on-and-off boyfriend, who had long, black hair brushed down almost over his eyes, and pale white skin that perfectly matched Anna’s. “Maybe Ethan just saw something in John that the rest of us didn’t see. We should be thankful he did that. Who knows what could have happened to us if he hadn’t.”

  I could see people in the crowd visibly nod in agreement. But there were still quite a few people, who were skeptical.

  “How are we even supposed to believe you, after you lied to us all?!” One man shouted out.

  “I’m telling the truth. I swear on my life.” The relaxed tone to Ethan’s voice faded to reveal the sheer amount of desperation inside of him. “If I am lying, then tell me why Jacob just flew back in his helicopter without taking me with him, or even punishing me?”

  There was silence in response.

  “See,” Ethan continued, just to emphasize his point. “I am telling the truth. There is no other explanation for that. Jacob really was okay with what happened. In fact, I just made his job easier.”

  I felt disgusted at the fact that people could view the value of human life as such a worthless thing. People shouldn’t just be okay with other people dying. But in today’s world, frankly, nothing surprised me.

  “I say we let him live.” Liam, who had been quiet for a while, spoke up again. Just his presence instantly causes people to agree with him. “Well, at least for now.”

  “Yeah!” Bianca yelled obnoxiously in her wheelchair from the back of the crowd.

  “I agree.” Another woman spoke up in a more somber tone. “But I don’t think he should be our leader.”

  “No, we can’t let that happen.” Anna narrowed her eyes at Ethan, accepting that her bid to kill him instantly was lost. “But I think we should put him on trial, and really try to find out what happened. We can search John’s computer to validate his claim and see if there are any witnesses of the moment when he killed John.”

  I instantly froze as the words came out of her mouth. No way. Panic coursed through me just at the thought of it. There’s no way in hell that I am going to be a witness.

  I shuddered, as most of the crowd nodded in agreement. I had to agree, that bitch Anna actually had a pretty logical idea. But no, just no. I tried to yell something out and stop it, but my scream just became drowned out in the cacophony of sound that erupted from the crowd.

  I turned toward Ethan, who began to storm off in the opposite direction toward the edge of the cliff. For a moment, I thought he was just going to jump off and end it all right then and there, but he stopped and sat down letting his legs dangle off the side of the mountain. Even from back here I could see the tears begin to pour out of his eyes vehemently, and see his bony body that began to shake erratically.

  I stared in horror at the heart of the camp, where all the tents and shacks were located with messy lines of drying clothes hanging from the sides of the structures, and at the group of people, who began to walk toward the shack that contained John’s computer.

  Well, shit. The disappointment and resentment bubbled up inside of me and fizzed out of my throat in an angry scream. I felt Hunter’s arms wrap around me in the same moment that tears began to pour out of my eyes. We’re done.

  I felt all the hope in my mind instantly crash as I pictured the inevitable happening. They are going to find out about Danielle, and they aren’t going to let us go.

  The vanquished feeling, along with sorrow and anger, crashed over my body out of nowhere, like the surge of a tidal wave pounding against the shore. I could feel my body succumb to the will of the waves of emotions inside of me, as my mind drifted further and further into the ocean of blues. Everything felt like it was caving in on me, and it is only a matter of time until the pressure became too much and my body collapsed under the weight of my emotions and the emptiness inside of me.

  Our one chance, gone. I closed my eyes, trying to wish away my reality and envelop all the light around me into the reddish blackness that adorned my eyelids. My only hope, crushed!

  My legs gave out from underneath me, and I fell to the ground with Hunter still smothering his arms and body around me.

  It’s all useless. It’s all done. I looked up at one of the many thunderstorm clouds, that seems to loom above me perpetually, even lurking on the horizon on a sunny day. I accept defeat.

  Chapter 11

  The warmth of his body provided my mind a sweet escape from the devastation of reality. Hunter’s defined, muscular body brought me a sense of comfort, and it made my mind start to spin wildly. He’s so hot. The thought crossed my mind before I realized that the statement is true both figuratively and literally. Despite the evening sun starting to set below the horizon, the heat of day still weighed down the air.

  The flame of orange was beginning to refract against the clouds and create light waves of pinks and purples that bled, like color from an oil painting, through the sky. The entire valley that Phoenix was in became shrouded in a thin layer of darkness as the sparse amount of light from the buildings began to emanate into the sky. I could feel the darkness expanding, continuing to swath over the light, and take over the mountains surrounding Phoenix.

  I looked up into Hunter’s bright blue eyes, and couldn’t decide what was more beautiful; the spectacular sunset draped across the sky, or Hunter himself. His blue eyes had a creamy texture to them, just like the sky has a rich splendor of colors, that included shades of red, purple, a
nd pink.

  “I don’t want to leave you,” he said.

  We were both standing up at the edge of the cliff, invisible from the rest of the camp due to the ominous shadows of twilight beginning to envelope the sky. His warm voice had a way of assuaging my nerves, and causing the tenseness in my body to instantly disappear. Everything about him made me instantly want to surrender, and I could feel the emptiness inside of me, struggling to muster up enough of myself.

  “But you don’t have to.” My voice was soft, and I let my lips move slowly. My hand subconsciously ran down his arm and finally stopped on the crease of his forearm.

  “No, Natalie.” There was a special sparkle in his eyes, and I could feel the energy radiating off his body that was just inches away from mine. “I don’t want to ever leave you.”

  He moved a soft hand from my waist and brushed away a loose strand of my dirty, blonde hair. In one smooth motion, I felt him pull my body even closer to his, and lean in and let our lips connect. A familiar, blissful, rush of adrenaline coursed through my body. His hands gradually moved downward from my waist, and I could feel my hands, that always seemed to have a mind of their own, begin to climb up his shirt. Just in the short amount of time that Hunter and I shared that moment, I could feel my mind drifting away from all the anxiety and trauma wrapped in my brain, and beginning to escape into the wormhole in my brain, that supposedly leads to happiness. The problem with that particular wormhole was that even though it theoretically existed, it was impossible, given my current state of mind, to allow it to open up and travel down into what could be the happiness and joy that was missing in my brain.

  It was easier with your eyes closed, and your entire body caught up in the wonders of the pleasure of someone else, to forget everything. It was easier, with everything inside of you spinning wildly, to pretend like life was all good. And it was easier, despite reality, to let yourself evade your true emotions and try to channel what felt like a short burst of fleeting happiness.

  I could feel his lips pull back, and my eyes open soon after. His blue eyes were shining with such intensity that I actually thought that they were going to burn through his eye lenses. They are so gorgeous. I took a deep breath and felt a calming feeling surround my body like an aura of warmth and comfort. In the moment, Hunter’s toned body, that felt like it could permanently reside next to mine, provided a shell of protection that shielded me temporarily from the horrors of the world around me. His brown hair glowed in the last rays of the sunlight, and his blue shirt seemed to be a perfect, tight fit around his body.

  I opened my mouth to say something in response, but just continued to stare into his eyes in awe. The sweet taste of his lips still lingered, like the aftertaste of chocolate, in my mouth. It’s just one of those things that tastes and feels so good, that you can just keep having more and more of it. Completely unaware of what my body was attempting to do, I could feel my arms pull Hunter back toward me, and our lips connected once again to instantly spark a plethora of emotions inside of me. I felt a sort of pain-like feeling jab in my side; it was not only my mind that longed for him, my body ached for him as well.

  “I can’t ever leave you,” he said, a sort of frantic, desperate tone to his voice. He glanced at the sky that was beginning to turn dark all around us. His face had a red tinge to it due to the deep colors of the sunset reflecting off his face.

  “Well, you don’t have to.” I smiled at him, and I had to suppress the urge in my body to claw at him for more. You are on a cliff, I could hear one part of my conscious mind screaming at the other. Not a good place to get horny.

  “No, I will have to!” The sadness spilled out of his eyes and intensified the glassy look to his face. “Natalie, it’s inevitable. Life just doesn’t work out this way.”

  I looked at him, and into his eyes and at his defined jaw line, and soft, smooth lips that reminded me of a warm blanket, with a confused expression strewn across my face.

  “Hunter,” I said, trying hard not to show the incertitude in my tone, “what are you talking about?”

  He sighed, letting the anger and frustration seep out of him in hot steam from his nostrils. I could see an expression of regret and despair swath over his face and cause his entire body to tense up as he tried to hold the tears back that were attempting to spill out of him onto the ground. Deep in his blue eyes there was a deep hatred for the world, burrowed beneath the sadness that started to culminate in a few drops of tears in his eyes.

  “Natalie, they have already taken everything from us.” His voice was so weak that I thought it would just snap in the middle of him talking. I could feel his strong, yet shaky hand try to brace itself around my waist. “And it’s only a matter of time before they take the last of what’s left of us. It’s only a matter of time before they take you from me.”

  The agonizing realization hit me hard in the chest, that one day I would truly have nothing; not even the fleeting memories of the happiness I fruitlessly attempted to get, and not even the few sweet, seconds of escape when I could absorb myself into Hunter’s warmth. One day, my body and mind would exist in a perpetual state of nothingness. And he was right. It was only a matter of time until the cumulonimbus cloud towering into sky above me dropped down to the ground and forever surrounded me in a deep, thick fog, that would make it impossible for me to even see the light of day.

  The miserable, defeated feeling moved so slowly through my blood vessels, that it threatened to clot them, and caused my heavy heart to sink even further into a state of ever-lucid depression. I could barely even manage to open my mouth to respond. The only thing I could do was throw my arms around him, and try to hold onto his body forever. You can’t leave me. The desperate feeling in my chest exploded out of me in a new round of forceful tears that reluctantly began to escape my eyes. I can’t just let you go.

  I would do anything, anything, to prevent the last good thing in my life from being taken from me. And I would do anything, absolutely any goddamn thing it took, to try and get some of the rich happiness in my old life back.

  I felt Hunter’s firm, toned arms wrap around me. In that moment, my body literally felt attached to his; it felt like it belonged with him.

  He can’t leave me. The thought only caused tears to stream down my face with more intensity. He’s the last thing left, and I won’t let them take it. My mind flashed back to my father; he was the one true rock in my life. Those first seven years of my life, whenever I needed anyone or anything, he was always there. He was truly the only person that took it upon himself to show me the world, and all of its mystic beauty. He was the one true constant in my life, until he was ripped away from me. Until he decided to run away, to evade the monsters lurking underneath his bed, and to escape death, and the government itself, that threatened to bring down hell upon him.

  And with that rock gone, I now had nothing to lean on. With him out of my life, for the longest time I had nothing, absolutely nothing and no one, to help me during my gravest hours. But that changed. With the arrival of Hunter in my life, there was the arrival of maybe just a little bit of all the goodness in my life that my father represented. Maybe, without me even consciously realizing it, Hunter became the single and lone pebble that I could count on.

  Hunter, with his compassionate blue eyes, and soft, comforting voice, vaguely reminded me of my father. Hunter, despite his imperfect flaws and the emptiness that was omnipresent, somehow embodied a little of what my dad brought into my life. Hunter, in light of everything, became the one and only constant in my life.

  But if that gets mercilessly torn away from me; if he somehow disappears from my life, then I will truly have nothing left. With Hunter gone, the constant reminder that life could get better would elude me, and the thick blackness, already having destroyed most of my insides, will begin to eat away at the last of the good left in me.

  “Well, I won’t let it happen.” I finally managed to croak the words out. There was a new defiance in my tone as I held him c
lose, very close, staring up into his eyes and the profusion of colors behind him that rivaled the beauty in his face.

  “You can say that, but you don’t have that power.” His tone sounded so defeated that it almost appeared as if his body was just going to collapse to the ground.

  “But, I have this power.” I pulled him even closer to me, and let my lips connect with his. I could feel the warm energy circumventing through his body into mine. I tried to lose my body in the moment, attempting to let the adrenaline flow through my insides and make me forget that the world was coming to an end. I wanted, in that moment, to forget everything, and only hold onto this one feeling, forever.

  As my arms forlornly grabbed onto his body, I could feel the euphoric rush of emotions cascade through my body. As sad and as boring of a life as it would be, I could let myself escape into this realm of lust forever. And, I could feel my body, desperately pulling on my mind to follow it into this new world, and to forever forget the harsh reality that plagues the real world. With every breath another rush of the hot, dry reality smacked me in the face and its aridness threatened to not only chap my lips, but crack my body altogether.

  Who knows how much time passed until our lips finally parted, and before my hands stopped dancing around his body. All I know, is that when I opened my eyes, the breadth of colors once apparent behind him had faded into the thin blackness of twilight. Time seemed to stand still. Everything around us stood frozen still, encapsulated in its beauty, and Hunter himself looked like something out of a dream. With the blackness and waning colors behind him, along with the entire valley of Phoenix that we appeared to be floating above, Hunter had a strange tinge to his entire body that almost made him look unreal.