The Amish Christmas Secret

by Vannetta Chapman

  And when Clyde fell despondent because he couldn’t walk to his girlfriend’s in the snowstorm, it was Daniel who told him to take his buggy.

  The truth was that he cared about her family.

  That wasn’t fake.

  That wasn’t a lie.

  It was an uncomfortable truth—uncomfortable because it made her question whether he cared for her. It seemed as if he did, but then, why had he lied to her for so long?

  It was after she helped to clean the dinner dishes, finished the last preparations for the next day’s celebration, and tucked Isabelle and Hannah into bed that her mamm tugged on her arm and suggested they walk to the barn together.

  Becca walked straight to the stall that now held all of her chickens. Carl-the-bad-tempered-rooster was sitting on top of the chicken house they’d built. The hens peeked out from their nests. She didn’t believe for a minute that her wayward rooster had changed his stripes, but she was grateful that for this one evening he’d chosen to behave.

  Becca made her way to Old Boy’s stall, intent on giving him all the carrots in her pockets. Then Constance stuck her head over the door, nudging her arm, and she couldn’t help laughing. It was ridiculous to be angry with the horse. It wasn’t the mare’s fault that her owner was dishonest.

  Her mamm stepped in front of Old Boy’s stall, cooing to him and scratching him between the ears.

  That image—of her mother so completely satisfied with life—caused Becca’s tears to flow freely. She tried to swipe at them casually, but little passed her mother’s notice.

  “Want to talk about it?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Okay. So start, and if you change your mind, you can stop.”

  “You make it sound so easy.”

  “There’s nothing easy about being hurt, Becca. Now tell me what happened.”

  So, she did. She confessed her feelings for Daniel, his feelings for her, his proposal the evening before and what seemed to her to be this insurmountable thing between them.

  “Let me see if I have this straight. You’re angry because he’s rich and he didn’t tell you that from day one.”

  “Not day one. I’m not naive. I know you don’t share those sorts of details with just anyone. But Mamm, he knew our family’s situation...”

  Becca stopped talking when her mamm began shaking her head. “Let’s keep those two things separate for now. It’s certainly not Daniel’s fault that we have limited resources.”

  “We’re poor. Just call it what it is.”

  “Do you really think so?” Her mamm’s smile was gentle, but her voice held a tinge of impatience. “Becca, I wish that you didn’t struggle with this. I wish I had gut advice to give you for every possible problem you will encounter. But I have never wished for a different life. Your dat has been a gut husband, and I love my family.”

  “But—”

  “There is no but on this point. What you insist on seeing as a huge obstacle is no more than an insignificant detail—like the bow on a gift. What counts is the intention behind the gift. What counts in this family is that we care for each other, not whether we can afford a new buggy.”

  Becca felt appropriately chastised but still confused. “So you don’t think he was wrong?”

  “Wrong about what?”

  “About keeping the truth of his finances a secret. About pretending to be poor. What if...what if he was laughing at us the whole time?”

  “Do you think he was?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “You do.” Her mamm stepped closer, waited for her to look up and then repeated her question. “Do you think Daniel was laughing at this family?”

  “Nein.” She felt miserable admitting it, but also as if a giant burden had been lifted. “I guess I’m a bit sensitive on the subject.”

  “A bit?” Her mamm reached forward and thumbed away her tears, then straightened her kapp. “What’s really bothering you?”

  “I know how to be poor. I’ve done it all my life, but I have no idea how to be rich.” The confession startled her. Was that really what was bothering her? Fear of the unknown? An unknown that she had been chasing for years?

  “Then we will pray that Gotte grants you wisdom and clarity in this area. One thing I know is that if you agree to marry Daniel, you have to accept all of him, including his past. It’s time for you two to grow up and understand that there are some things in life we don’t get to choose. Instead, we trust Gotte’s design for our life and then do the best we can.”

  She hooked her arm through Becca’s, they said good-night to the horses and rushed back across the snow-filled night to the house.

  Becca was relieved that Daniel wasn’t waiting for her.

  She needed time to think and pray.

  * * *

  Christmas morning dawned with a clear blue sky and sunshine that would probably melt the snow before evening. Hannah and Isabelle were already at the table by the time Becca made it downstairs.

  “We’re fasting,” Hannah declared.

  “That means only milk for breakfast.” Isabelle sipped hers carefully, then whispered, “Because the baby Jesus didn’t have much when He was born.”

  “Ya, and we want to remember that.”

  “But later we get cake.”

  “And ham.”

  “And presents.”

  Becca ruffled the hair of both girls, remembering Christmases past—the first time she’d understood what it meant to fast, the time her grandparents from Ohio had come to stay with them, the year when the twins were only babes.

  Her mamm pushed a mug of coffee into her hands, and before she’d drank even half of it all the men came in through the mudroom, stomping their feet and declaring it a perfect Christmas morning.

  It was during the reading of the Christmas story that she finally met Daniel’s gaze. The entire family was there—even Abigail, Aaron, William and Thomas. Abigail would have her baby in the next few days. She’d have to. There was simply no way she could get any bigger.

  It wasn’t uncomfortable with all of them crowded into Daniel’s living room. It was cozy. It felt good and right that they should be together like this.

  Would she want a bigger house?

  It wouldn’t make a bit of difference. She could see that now. What mattered was that they were together.

  “Why did Baby Jesus have to sleep in the barn?” Hannah asked.

  Isabelle perked up. She always perked up when she knew an answer. “Because the motel was full.”

  “Inn,” Francine said. “The inn was full.”

  “What’s an inn?”

  “It was a place where people stayed when they were away from home—a long time ago.” Georgia pushed up her glasses. “The barn must have been cold and a little smelly.”

  “It’s probably true that it wasn’t where Mary and Joseph wanted to have their baby.” Her dat stared down at the open Bible in his lap. “But it wasn’t a surprise to God the Father. Listen to what the angels told the shepherds. Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. It was a divine appointment they had, and the birth of the Christ Child in a manger? That was Gotte’s plan all along.”

  Hannah squirreled her nose. “I’d rather have a divine appointment in a house than in a stinky barn.”

  “But barns are nice, too.” Isabelle clasped her hands in her lap. “When the hay is fresh, and there’s that horsey smell. I kinda like barns.”

  “I think there’s more to this story than whether the babe was born in a smelly stall or a clean room.” Clyde shifted in his seat.

  Watching him, Becca realized that he’d become a man. When had that happened? While she’d been chasing schemes to improve their lot in life, her bruder had grown up. She’d missed it. Glancing around the group, she realized she didn’t want to miss anything
else. She didn’t want finances to be her focus. Maybe she could trust her parents to care for them. Maybe they didn’t need her help. Maybe Gotte had a plan.

  “Explain what you mean by that, son.”

  “It’s that there was no pretense. Can’t go much lower than a barn. I think the point might be that we can all approach the Christ child, we can all approach the Lord, without worrying about our status in life.”

  “Oh, come let us adore Him,” Daniel said.

  Which started the twins singing, and soon they all joined in. It was a precious moment, one that didn’t last nearly long enough. Becca thought that perhaps when she was very old—if she lived to be very old—she would remember them all crowded into Daniel’s sitting room as they sang that age-old hymn.

  * * *

  Daniel searched his memory, trying to recall a Christmas like the one he was experiencing, but he couldn’t. His family had never had the kind of peace he saw in the faces around him. He was sure that on one level his family did love each other, but there had always been friction between them. The money they’d inherited had only intensified those feelings.

  After their Scripture reading, everyone drifted off to various spots. The next few hours passed in a sweet atmosphere of quiet and contemplation. He read his Bible, wrote in his notebook, prayed for himself and this family surrounding him, and he prayed for Becca. He asked that Gotte would guide them, even as he realized that he’d lost his heart to her long ago. There was no going back. Regardless of what she decided, he loved and would always love Becca.

  He gradually became aware of folks moving around, dishes being heated in the kitchen, laughter and teasing. When he finally walked out of his room, he gasped at the spread on the kitchen table.

  “Did you think we were going to eat sandwiches?” Sarah handed him a platter filled with a giant turkey that she must have cooked the day before. It was stuffed with dressing full of carrots and celery. His stomach growled so loudly that Abigail laughed and nudged him with her elbow. “I’m supposed to have the stomach that draws all the attention.”

  “I suppose you’re ready to have that boppli.”

  “We both are,” Aaron admitted. “The rascal wakes us both up in the middle of the night.”

  Soon they were all gathered around the table, a veritable feast laid out before them. After the blessing, Daniel glanced up and caught Becca watching him. She didn’t look away. Didn’t blush or smile but simply waited, and Daniel knew what she was waiting for.

  He knew what he needed to do.

  What he should have done long ago.

  So, as the turkey was passed, and the vegetable dishes were shuffled back and forth, he cleared his throat and dove in.

  “There’s something I’d like to share with each of you—something I should have shared many weeks ago, but I didn’t know how. I suppose I was a little embarrassed. To be truthful, in the past when people learned the truth about me, the result wasn’t always gut.”

  He had everyone’s attention now, and he didn’t want the wonderful meal that Sarah had prepared to go cold, so he got right to the point.

  “I’m rich. I inherited a large sum of money a few years ago—my entire family did. It caused quite a bit of strife between everyone. My bruder even left the faith, though I hope and pray every day that he will find Gotte on whatever path he chooses. That’s all beside the point. I’m sorry that I wasn’t honest, and I appreciate the way you’ve made me feel at home here in Shipshewana.”

  David leaned toward Eli and said in a mock whisper, “That’s how he paid for Constance.”

  Which started everyone laughing, then the meal proceeded as if he hadn’t revealed this long-held secret.

  “Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm?” Samuel asked. He glanced at Daniel—eyes sparkling and a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. “Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.”

  Groans and laughter echoed around the table.

  Even Becca smiled and rolled her eyes. The conversation turned to the meal and gifts and the return to school the following week.

  His big revelation hadn’t made much of an impression on this group, and that, more than anything else, convinced him that he’d done the right thing.

  Now he only had to wait to see if Becca would forgive him.

  Chapter Thirteen

  After the leftovers had been put away and the dishes washed, they all gathered in the sitting room again. This was one of Becca’s favorite moments of Christmas—not because she cared about what gifts she received. She loved watching the expressions of her bruders and schweschdern as they opened their presents.

  Each person pretending to be surprised.

  Each person exclaiming over a small thing that was either handmade or cost very little.

  Because of the fire, this year they had even less than usual. In fact, they had practically nothing, but somehow everyone had scrambled and managed to come up with gifts.

  Hannah and Isabelle received new dolls and new frocks. Both had been donated by members of their church, but they didn’t know that. They threw their arms around their mamm and thanked her over and over.

  Georgia received not one but three new-to-her books.

  Francine had taken up knitting, and she received a set of circular needles and a bag of yarn. Becca had stopped by the yarn shop in town hoping to find something on clearance, and the owner had insisted on donating the items. “Fires are terrible things. My parents lost everything in one years ago, and I’ll never forget the tragedy of it. The community pulled together, though. That’s what they did then, and I think it’s what we should still do now.”

  She wouldn’t even consider letting Becca set up a payment plan for the items.

  David and Eli received new work tools that they claimed they’d been eyeing for months.

  Clyde received buggy blankets for the buggy he hadn’t purchased yet. “Glad the money I’ve managed to save wasn’t lost in the fire.”

  “Where was it?” Daniel asked.

  “In the bank—definitely not under my mattress.”

  Abigail’s little boys received puzzles, a new ball, and two used bicycles that had been hidden in the barn when the fire occurred. They were used, but her dat had cleaned them up with a coat of paint and new seats.

  Abigail and Aaron were given the only thing that actually cost money, and the entire family had pitched in. “A gift card? But...”

  “We all contributed, dear.” Sarah wrapped an arm around her daughter’s shoulder. “It’s so you both can pick out what you need for the baby—once you know whether it’s another boy or a girl.”

  “Danki,” Aaron said. “We didn’t expect that.”

  There was a surprise for Becca’s parents, as well. They all had to troop over to the barn to see it.

  “Oh, my.” Sarah’s fingertips covered her mouth. Sitting in the middle of the room were two rocking chairs.

  “For the new front porch, once the house is rebuilt.” Abigail put a hand on her stomach.

  When it seemed her mamm and dat still didn’t know what to say, Clyde stepped forward. “We didn’t waste money on them. Don’t worry about that. We found them in town, at a garage sale. The guy had heard about our fire and insisted on giving them to us. We all spent a little time out here the last few days refinishing them.”

  “Danki,” her father said. “This was very thoughtful, and it helps us...”

  He swiped at his eyes, then smiled at his family. “It helps us to focus on what’s to come rather than what we’ve lost.”

  He stared at the ground a moment, then looked up at his family. “I hope you all know that we thank Gotte every day for your safety. That house on the hill that’s simply a charred ruin now...it doesn’t matter. What matters is each person in this room.”

  Becca felt as if her heart were being wrung like a dis
h towel. Why was it that her heart felt so tender? Watching her parents, her siblings, even Daniel, reminded her that she’d been focused on the wrong things for too long.

  She realized with a start that she didn’t feel poor. Their circumstances hadn’t changed, not really, but she felt very wealthy.

  Her somber thoughts were interrupted by Hannah and Isabelle shouting, “Now for Daniel’s present.”

  “But I didn’t get you all anything.”

  “Because we told you not to, Daniel. Because you’re giving us a place to stay.” Becca’s mamm reached over and squeezed his arm. “That gift means more than any other ever could.”

  Clyde, Hannah and Isabelle had run to one of the back stalls. Now they walked out with a long box holding Daniel’s gift.

  “I believe I saw that box under my bed.”

  “Ya, it was there, but we had to move it. Didn’t want you finding it.” Francine ran her fingers up and down her kapp strings. “I hope you like it.”

  “I’m sure I will.” Daniel glanced at Becca, his eyes questioning, but she only shrugged. She wasn’t going to spoil the surprise now.

  He opened the box to reveal a brand-new dark gray horse blanket with the word Constance embroidered across the bottom.

  “In case we have a cold front, and she needs it.”

  “Everyone knows how much you care for the horse.”

  “It was at Lydia Kline’s, being embroidered the night of the fire.”

  Becca heard all the comments from her family, but her attention was on Daniel. Were those tears in his eyes? Over a horse blanket?

  But of course, it was more than that. It was that they had, out of their poverty, found a way to give to him. Which was what neighbors and friends were supposed to do. The only question was whether Daniel Glick was merely a friend and neighbor, or did she want him to be more?

  * * *

  Later that evening, when once again she couldn’t sleep, Becca made her way to the kitchen. When she saw Daniel sitting there at the table, she almost backed away.

  “Please. Don’t leave on my account.”